When the going gets tough, the tough get Yams

[SoozC]

Thread five!

A safe place for those of you who have been trying to conceive for 6+ months and even yams aren’t helping. Come and have a good ol’ bitch and a moan without judgement.

The Yam Commandments are as follows;

• Thou shalt not arrive one day and post BFP next day

• Thou shalt not give advice to others when TTC for one month only

• Thou shalt not participate in one-up-manship and realise TTC is shit for everyone in different ways

• Thou shall allow posters to be fucked off with the world and everything in it at regular points in the month

• Thou shalt not be offended by strong language

• Thou shalt not tell everyone to eat yams

• Thou shall accept being called a muppet for testing at 7dpo at 9pm at night

And most importantly...

• Thou shalt not symptom spot during the two week wait and must be prepared for a telling off if you do so.

Thanks @QuietTime and @FairyAnn

Did a FRER this morning and got a good dark line so feeling a little reassured. I hope you don't mind me lurking for a bit, hoping you all have a marvellous March x

@RhiBee29 congrats! Wahoo.

Looking for some advice ladies
What day do you usually ovulate? I'm on cd 10 and have been doing opks for 4 days to get an idea
These are the order top to bottom in the picture
CD6 10pm
CD7 7pm
CD8 9am
And 1pm
CD9 9am
And 6pm
CD10 midday
And 6pm
Will do another today shortly as haven't been to the loo since 6pm
They look to be going the right way to me but I haven't done them this religiously before
One app is estimating I will ovulate on CD 17 and the other CD 19
My periods have been a bit off the past few months but average cycle length is 30-32 days. Also temping but I know that won't show anything until after I ovulate

@Bubblegum89 fingers crossed this is a proper period for you!! And yay to booking the holiday too! We are off away in July - almost never booked it way back when cause of ttc, how silly and annoyed I'd of been at myself now if I never had that to look forward to!
@FairyAnn sorry to hear you're feeling crappy - those days are the worst when they do come along. Sending hugs your way and hope you feel more positive tomorrow!
How are you doing @LimpLettice
@RhiBee29 pleased to hear you've got a strong line!
Sorry I've been pretty absent recently, ttc, work, and a load of other shit taking up all of my time - hoping all you lovely yammers are ok xx

@bama4 I would get dtd if I were you! Your last opk looks nearly +ve. I ov between CD10 and 14 and my cycles vary between 24 and 28 days.

12dpo and feeling completely un-hormonal this month. No sore boobs, no pre-af downer (yet), can't help thinking I didn't ov this month? Ttc is so crazy - I feel better than I have done for months and all I can do is worry about why!!

@Chooklass thanks! We dtd for the past 2 days - did another opk last night and it was the same colour as the last one so I will do a couple more today and hope they are darker!

@bama last cycle I ov’d cd16 and had a 30 day cycle. That’s a late ov for me and a longer cycle! So cd17 doesn’t sound that late. Hope you have the energy to keep dtd!

2ww for me at the moment. We have the SMEP thing a go. 3 days in a rim was completely knackering!!

I looked into the progesterone cream as I often have ore af spotting, but decided against it. If you do get pregnant you need to continue the cream or there's a risk of mc, and I was worried I might forget to do it....also looked like a load of side effects. Might look into B6 if this cycle is a no go.....

My ov date has varied between day 14-22 with my cycle 25-33 days.....

My OV date is usually around CD17, but has been as late as CD22 (that was a 38 day cycle).
This cycle I think that I OV'd on CD14, which fits with my new shorter cycle (hopefully anyway).

Thanks all - hopefully I ovulate pretty soon then or this could get tiring! Determined not to miss it this month

Spoke too soon about af. It’s pretty much disappeared other than a couple of brown/grey(?!) spots when I wiped this morning. Wow a whole 2 day period, great work, uterus...

Ok I suppose thank you Bama. Trying to just get on with it really. Thinking about ttc again when it's all over but feel very halfhearted about it. I've been in a bit of pain today and a tad scared of infection so Friday's follow up scan is important even though I'm dreading it.

My scan consultant marked a swollen or fluid filled tube, which he said had nothing to do with miscarriage, on the other side from the ovary which produced this egg. Bit worried that's been hampering us but who knows if it makes any difference. It's not like I'm not getting pregnant, I'm just not keeping them.

Bit late but Fairyann that is something that just makes me rage. I know a fair few people irl who have just thought ooh, I fancy a baby, yes we've only been together 6 months / he's abusive / he has kids with 3 other women...and bam, they're pregnant. It hurts.
Yes I know their baby is not my baby blah blah blah but grrr.

Already beginning to feel like this month is a busy. DD is poorly and waking up every 10mins, I’m 2 days away from ovulating and we haven’t managed to dtd once yet 🙄😥

Glad to know I'm not the only one who gets down about it. Oh well, new month, new chances!

Hi guys, I'm wondering if I can put a suggestion forward: could we have a policy of no bfp photos? I don't look at bfp photo threads and if someone here says they have a bfp, I trust them. We used to have a Yammers rule of no bfp photos... Possibly because we weren't getting any bfps at that point! But now we are, which is great, but I find photos upsetting. So it's a personal request.

If you don't want this that's fine, but I just wanted to put it out there. I guess I am struggling mentally and emotionally. x

I agree Sooz I’m actively avoiding BFP threads now (I don’t think they should be posted on the conception boards full stop tbh...) As happy as I am for all of you, I’m struggling a bit at the moment too

@SoozC I'm happy for this to be a policy on this thread
Very happy for any yammers getting their bfp though and hopefully we'll all get there eventually

I don’t mind having a no pictures rule, I personally don’t find the bfp announcements on here that hard to handle but I do stay away from announcement threads and for some reason pictures do make it harder to see.

I agree Sooz although I find even a post about a BFPs hard enough at the moment because I'm bitter and twisted

Guys, thank you for being so understanding. I agree, Dreamer, that even a bfp announcement is hard, although I'm happy for people on here and the mc thread I'm on (still makes me sad for myself though).

Like I said, I am happy people are getting lucky, really! But there have been so many bfps around me lately I have found it incredibly hard to remain positive for myself.

Two pregnant teachers at school. As their bumps grow I know I'm going to find it harder and harder, because I'm still grieving for my lost bump. Having told the HT we're still trying, if I end up teaching a full year from September and fail to get on maternity again I will be so embarrassed. I hate people knowing we're trying when it hasn't come to anything. I told one person at my last place when we just started trying; two years on, I'm still not pregnant and she got pregnant a few months after starting ttc and now has 4-month-old twin girls. I hate it.

Sorry, maybe I need to step back from the thread, I realise lots of my posts lately have been self-serving and miserable. And that doesn't help any of you. x

Sooz please don't step away. I understand so much. Even posts are hard to swallow, much as I'm pleased for everyone on here. I've had such a difficult time watching a close colleague fall pregnant, grow in front of me then have twins, all the while I've miscarried twice, had a chemical, and basically feel like biggest biological failure of all time. Even if I do get another bfp, at this point I'll just sit and wait for it to fail which is horrible. I was on a thread last year where I got the first bfp, then as I miscarried every single other poster got a bfp. They were lovely but it was dreadful. They're all starting to be due now and I'm just

This one is different though I think, and actually having somewhere to be openly hurt and upset is healthy. I hope. Although I might be too doom laden for the positive ladies here too.

@sooz and @limp it’s so hard to see another bfp, I get it. I’m really happy for those who’ve been TTC for ages but it doesn’t lessen me wishing it for myself and being distraught that it’s hasnt been me ever yet.
IRL I’m surrounded by friends with children or pg. as much as some have been very sympathetic and listened to me this is the thread that has helped me feel less alone, less like a failure, less of a biological freak. I may not be part of the pg groups but I feel part of the yammers. Part of this is sharing the positive and the negative mood swings- of which mine feel extreme and frequent!

As well as being a mixture of hilarious and informative - for example I’m now aiming my wee into the wrapper the opk comes in (Genius suggestion!) There is much support here, from those who genuinely understand the pain of TTC.

We all get sad and I think it is healthy to share the sadness and frustration. And then breathe and try to get on with dtd.

Ladies after the opks I posted the other day
Done 3 yesterday all lighter than before and one today can barely see the line - does this mean I could have ovulated already? Not ovulated at all? Can you get an almost positive then lighter tests then a positive later on as I wasn't expecting to ov till cd 17ish and I'm on cd12 now
Sorry - first time doing them and I'm so confused. Have posted the pic from the other day again below the bottom 2 are midday and 6pm on cd10