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When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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TTC after pregnancy loss. Thread 16. New Year, new hope for all!

999 replies

NoCatsHere · 18/01/2018 14:31

Hello to anyone TTC after suffering pregnancy loss at any stage. Supportive group for all hoping for their rainbow babies.

OP posts:
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HoldTightPretendItsAPlan · 29/01/2018 11:56

PassTheAfterEights sounds exactly like my two at 5 and (just) 6 weeks. If your are worried though, do push to see someone Flowers

Skittlelover · 29/01/2018 14:42

Passtheaftereights I had a similar time with my second miscarriage and I waited a week and took a test again which was negative so i tried again. But do see someone if you are worried about anything.
Gp is referring me for tests now which is good but also very depressing, they said to wait til after the appointment to try again :(.

Boboelephant · 29/01/2018 18:28

@Cookiefiend glad your body seems to be getting back on track!
@cakelaur I didn't know that about the pelvic muscles. Thanks for sharing!
@PassTheAfterEights I haven't had a spontaneous loss but I think as long as your test is neg and you ovulate go for it!
@Skittlelover glad you got the appt although sorry you have to wait. There was another girl on here who had 3 losses but a DC in between and still went to the RMC

HoldTightPretendItsAPlan · 29/01/2018 18:45

Thanks for the advice Boboelephant and Cakelaur I'll give it a go & might pick up a copy of the book too.

Eastend2015 · 29/01/2018 21:57

Hello guys- and welcome newbies, I’m so sorry for your losses. I’m still here but trying to take a bit of a step back from TTC because it was really doing my head in. I’ve just signed up for a new art course and been busy decorating. skittles I had an EP, then MMC, then DS then another MC in December. Thanks to a very supportive GP we are booked at the RMC on 7th.

Cakelaur · 29/01/2018 22:31

The book is amazing. Massively explanatory and put my mind at ease big time.

Glammeup · 30/01/2018 01:33

Hi had a blighted ovum at 10.6 weeks empyt sac two children 13 and 4 am 39 so scared same thing will happen again . Sorry for all your losses here’s to Hope ..

Cookiefiend · 30/01/2018 15:49

Sorry @Glammeup . It's hard isn't it. Like you I had two children from two easy pregnancies and it never really occurred to me there might be a problem with the third. I too am worried it will happen again, but am clinging to the idea that we are all just playing the odds- it happens in around 1/3 pregnancies. So it is no more or less likely to happen next time.

It's hard to believe that though. Sorry for your loss. Hope next time is fine.

MrsMac1489 · 30/01/2018 17:27

I just don't trust the clear blue OPKs. I never get a peak day with them considering how much they cost and I'm testing twice a day at the moment because of the MC I want to know where I am. The cheap ones work much better, you can see the two lines and you know when it's positive or not. I don't know if anyone else has had the same experience? I'm getting really frustrated with negative or high days but never seeing a peak.

Glammeup · 30/01/2018 19:53

Hello all sorry your all going through this yes @cookiefiend really hard to stay positive but we have to

Glammeup · 30/01/2018 19:56

Yes mrs mac i don’t understand - after miscarriage the cheaper opk gave me a positive for two days ok so that was day 9 of first cycle after miscarriage no stringy mucus think maybe cycle all over place .any advice welcome

Cookiefiend · 30/01/2018 20:09

Not to sound like a total idiot- but OPKs show when your hormone surges and that indicates you will ovulate in 12-36 hours. When do you have sex?

So I got a positive OPK the first day I tested (that is when they arrived). Had sex the day before (no idea what an OPK would have said) and the day of. But not the day after. Now I am worried I missed my chance if i ovulated the day after. The strength of the line has now decreased so that was definitely the surge.

Also- is it worth continuing to test now the surge has gone since my body has been weird. Or do I wait until after AF?

Gosh I have never thought of all this before. I feel like I'm making it all a bit less fun!

How is everyone else doing? I guess I'm in the tww- never even given that much thought in the past. Where are you all?

Cookiefiend · 30/01/2018 20:11

I'm reassured that @Glammeup and @MrsMac1489 are also baffled by OPKs. Maybe they just give lines randomly to busy us and give us something to think about!

MrsMac1489 · 30/01/2018 20:17

It's like the cheap "two lines" ones give me a definite positive, the month we conceived we did it like every other day and I got a positive ovulation test. I think about it like "if this was a pregnancy test would I be 100% convinced. No squinting necessary." But with the clear blue ones I can test all the time and not get a consistent result. Even when my various (3 to be precise) apps tell me I'm ovulating. I'm still waiting for my temperature surge. I trust my temperature more than the ovulation tests.

emwithme · 30/01/2018 20:53

Back to CD1 here. Have had a really shitty 30 hours, my dad (we were LC for years, NC at times, very shitty complex relationship, he had alzheimers) died yesterday. I wanted a drink last night so POAS and BFN. So I drank. Possibly more than I should, but hey. I'm an orphan. And I should be either holding a 4 month old or 8.5 months pregnant but I am neither, and then today I came on again. And now I'm angry. Angry at my shitty body for not being able to hold on to a pregnancy. Angry at my shitty father for leaving my mum and, despite being a wonderful man to everyone else, being an absolute bastard to me.

Cookiefiend · 30/01/2018 21:49

@emwithme Flowers

Sorry you are having such a shit time.

Cakelaur · 30/01/2018 22:55

@MrsMac1489 I usually love my cbafm but since the MC it’s going mental. I reset the cycle and hoping that it’s sorted itself out. It reckons I had an oestrogen surge this morning now waiting for LH surge. Cheapies are currently negative finally (after being blazing positive for the last 10 days! 🙈) So may see a surge in a couple of days. Hoping to test negative for pregnancy in a couple of days too!
@emwithme so sorry you’re feeling shitty!! I had a total meltdown today and just cried at my other half the whole way through dinner. So angry that all our plans for this year are ‘ruined’ now that baby isn’t due and we should be 12 weeks on Thursday. So sorry for your losses.

MrsMac1489 · 30/01/2018 23:09

@Cookiefiend the little Spermies live for a while in there. So even if it's the day before ovulation they still have a good chance of reaching the egg on its way down.

Clare2000 · 31/01/2018 16:31

I spent so much time in the middle of many nights last year on these threads after having a surgical abortion (due to complications) at 14 weeks and now I'm posting after 7 months trying to conceive again and one chemical, I'm now sat awaiting a miscarriage after getting a BFP on new years day, the irony - thought it was to good a start to the year to be true. The 8 week scan yesterday showed nothing had developed - it feels like (am almost 39) that I only produce eggs that are chromosomally challenged. It's hard enough being disappointed every month when TTC and I thought we'd had out shit luck, but that's the only answer I've had - that it's just bad luck. I suppose I'm hoping for some light at the end of the tunnel here? Nit nervous of the miscarriage too, apparently it's not grown past 4-5 weeks so shouldn't be too bad?

Glammeup · 31/01/2018 17:34

Em sorry to hear this that’s exactly how I feel Claire only produce bad eggs at 39

Cakelaur · 31/01/2018 17:38

Evening ladies. Sorry everyone is feeling a bit shit. It’s hard. After a total melt down last night I’ve had some good news this evening... a negative pregnancy test and a normal looking opk.
There hope in that right there. Never imagined being excited by a negative pregnancy test. But now I can start again.

TTC after pregnancy loss. Thread 16. New Year, new hope for all!
Glammeup · 31/01/2018 18:14

Clare I think you’ll still have some clotting unfortunately as in some cases the sac continues to grow - sorry to hear :(

Ferny2000 · 31/01/2018 18:30

@glammeup Sorry to hear your feeling the same, great being 'old' isn't it. I've got another scan Tuesday and a surgical booked weds morning if it hasn't happened by then, it can't be as bad as last time at least. I never envisaged having a child would be this hard!

HoldTightPretendItsAPlan · 31/01/2018 20:14

I never envisaged having a child would be this hard!

This resonates with me so much. Growing up I thought looking at a man would get you upduffed.

Primrose16 · 31/01/2018 20:23

Hi there. Is it okay to bob in now and then. Had my 3rd miscarriage on the 12th January and not entirely sure what I’m doing. Head is a mess. This pregnancy wasn’t planned as my little girl is only 14 months and didn’t feel ready. Now I have lost I feel that I need that small age gap. But I’m sooooooo scared of trying again. I don’t think I could take another loss- but the thought of not having another breaks my heart. I had my first mc Dec 14 and mmc Aug 15. It took 4 months to drop on then 8 months after mmc to conceive my daughter. My pregnancy with her I hated and missed out on so much through fear of loosing.
I don’t know the point to this ramble at all. Just so so confused