TTC After MC 12: Hopeful Twats and Emotional Wrecks welcome!

[BertieBotts]

Come one, come all, new and old, no-one wants to be here, but at least we're glad we've got each other :)

Hope your stay here is short.

Now, some BFPs if you please and BFNs for those who are waiting for them too!

HFH I had exactly the same experience with my last pregnancy - you get that feeling don't you, that you just "know". It did show up eventually! I honestly think intuition for being pregnant really exists as I've had it both times and also lost that sure feeling I had as soon as the babies stopped growing in my mmc and a few days leading up to my second, natural mc. I would just leave it a week and test again. I have everything crossed it will be a bfp next time!

In terms of the blow out - do it! A one off won't harm a baby this early on anyway, even if you are. As Anne said, nurture yourself - it's so important.

Fox, maybe someone meant to write ov for ovulation but it either changed it to ob or they just pressed they b instead of the v with them being next to each other?!

Thanks for everybody's well wishes. I'm obviously testing every hour just to make sure I'm not leaving the group til I know more. It doesn't feel real yet. I tried for nine months and it resulted in a mc. I can't believe we have only dtd 7 times and now I'm pregnant again. It's crazy! It's early days and I'm really scared. I'm on constant knicker watch. Analysing every twinge.

I'm still angry at the gp. She never even let me look at the test she did but I guarantee there would have been a line on it. The more I think about it the more odd I think it was.

She said "I don't want to ruin your dreams but that's a negative"

"There is no line on this test it's blank" as she threw it in the bin.

"stop worrying about your progesterone levels, that wouldn't be an issue at 33 years old"

I'm a better doctor than her!

Bertie, missed your post - kinda funny(?) but also awful! Your poor OH! Bless him. That'll teach him for trying to be creative! 😉

Lime, I'm still angry at your bloody gp! It's making me furious that someone can just play with people's emotions like that in such a throw-away way! I don't blame you for feeling anxious. Lots of Netflix as a way to chill and distract?

Step, it was me who had the scratch. It's supposed to improve chances by 25% and I have got pg next cycle.

I had it as part of a research programme through the RMC. It was like a quite uncomfortable smear but I closed my eyes and pretended to be on the beach. Over quite quickly.

Was that at Coventry, msjuniper? Or St Mary's? I'm going for my first appointment at Coventry on Monday.

Hi Ladies,

I haven't posted in a while - some of you may remember I found out I was pregnant in may and have been following silently still and even now at 14 weeks I'm not quite ready to leave, luckily after 3 losses all is going well with this pregnancy so please have hope. I only know how hard that is trust me but it will happen.

@annelovesgilbert - you mentioned someone having the endometrial scratch. It was me (well I might have) I was part of the trial at Tommy's and either had it or didn't (I won't find out intol next year) but seeing as this is the only pregnancy out of 4 that's made it to the 12 week mark I am going to believe I have.

It might be worth mentioning what I did the month I conceived as I know it's so hard every cycle when AF arrives.

I brought fertility crystals and had them on my bedside table next to a photo of myself and my husband and we wrote a girls name and boys name on a piece of paper and left that under the stones (our baby names)

Used digital ovulation sticks and did the deed on the day off and day after smiley face.

Took vegan prenatals which contain folate instead of synthetic folic acid.

Can't think of anything else but I wish you all the baby dust in the world Ladies and never give up. Xx

All those with bfps please don't leave us! You guys give us all hope & we're rooting for you.

@BertieBotts everyday's a school day isn't it?! I genuinely thought blue balls was senior school lies! 😂

Also I read the yesterday that opks in the first cycle after mc don't work effectively. Has anyone else heard this?

Lisa my scratch was at St Mary's. Are you having the NK cells testing at Coventry? I am thinking of doing that if this pregnancy doesn't stick.

Yes, I am. Slightly nervous about it hurting - they tell you to bring a sanitary towel in case it makes you bleed. Was joking about it with DH today - I'm seeing the other one there, but had been hoping for an appointment with Siobhan Quenby - she's a miscarriage celebrity!

yellow I i imagine that might be as they can be positive from hcg if you haven't had a negative test yet? I'm debating whether to give them a go this weekend or not as I think i'm getting some EWCM today, but might just dtd and relax a bit this cycle as I don't think I ov'd the first cycle after MC last time!
Please stick around all those with BFPs, it gives me hope!

Ladies, bestie is just about to arrive but just wanted to say a huge thank you for your support and for making me feel much less guilty if I just say sod it and grab the wine bottle! Much appreciated!

Lisa, I saw Dr. Quenby at Coventry. It was a really quick appointment - maybe 15 minutes - and then some time with the nurses. I had a follow up call to tell me everything was fine with the tests and then a letter today. I think I was expecting her to have all the answers, which she didn't of course. But I wouldn't be too disappointed not to see her - it was a bit of an anticlimax. Dr. Brosens is the specialist in NK Cells anyway

Thanks for the info about endo scratch, MsJuniper and Nicola. Really encouraging that both of you got preggers off the back of it! I'm in the Tommy's trial at Coventry so I might call and ask them about the endo scratch. If not, probably private. I wasn't offered the NK killer cells test but I don't know if that's because I already had DD. Unfortunately I've found most of the professionals are dismissive because of my age (40) in that "it's your age so you just have to keep trying until you don't have a miscarriage" which is so depressing. I've been advised against IVF as apparently no better odds so I just have to hope I can buck the statistics.

Lisa, I am furious on your behalf for your stupid doctor. What a massive tool. I would be kicking off at the surgery and defo seeing another doctor.

Plenty of baby dust to all you lovely ladies so we can carry on with these BFPs... x

HFH, get on the wine!!! x

Struggling tonight with the "my life is in limbo" feeling. Which is dumb I know given it's only cycle 3 post mc but we started trying in January, since when I've gotten pregnant (in march), stayed pregnant for almost 3 months, told family and friends, miscarried (in may), and now feel like I've wasted all this energy over the last 7 months and I'm no closer to having a baby.

It's like I've become so fixated on pregnancy that the idea of a real live baby is now unimaginable. When I was pregnant I used to get flashes of realisation and cry with the overwhelming massive beautiful emotion that I was carrying our child.

Sorry to moan - I know many of you have been trying for a lot longer than me. I'm 2dpo and just feel depressed that this is probably another failed cycle. I have no faith at all that it will work. Ironically my DD was born as a result of an unplanned pregnancy when I was 18! And this time I had it all nicely planned. Thank you universe

Being in limbo is crap.

Those 9 cycles before I got pregnant 1st time were loooong. I'll be honest I was only "keen" for about 2. Then I became desperate, then I didn't care, then I was desperate again. It was long and dull and took over my life. I had to untell about 5 million people when it all went tits up! I'm pretty sure there are still people in this world that think I should be around 22 weeks by now (awkward).

It's very stressful. And a phase of my life that I'm looking forward to be done with. I don't think I'm going to be one of those people that wants even more kids after they think they are "done". I dont want to push my luck.

Oh, Grumpy and Lime, sorry to hear you're struggling. Being in limbo is truly and utterly shit. The hardest thing I think is just not knowing - if someone could say 'don't worry you'll be pregnant in 3 months and have your baby in a year' then you'd be able to relax. Don't apologise for moaning - it's what we're all here for. Take care of yourself and try to enjoy the weekend as much as you can. For me that would involve prosecco, chocolate and a good read but whatever floats your boat x

And now I'm in limbo because I have a whole punch of positives and a gp that doesn't believe me, you couldn't make it up! I'm just gonna sit tight and find another focus for now.

I've got a huge family wedding next week. I do not want anyone to know my potential news. The not drinking is going to be an issue. And if anything bad happens, I don't want it on that day!

Lisa I was the same at St Mary's with Professor Regan, I bumped into her in the ladies and she smiled and said hello and it was like meeting a celebrity! I was slightly disappointed to be referred to Raj Rai in the end...

I did need a sanitary towel after the scratch but it didn't hurt once it was over, just that really icky feeling you get after a smear (well I do).

Things are not feeling great this evening. I can't put my finger on it but I keep expecting to see blood when I go to the loo.

Can someone tell me the secret to getting a bfp? Cycle 5 post mc and I'm getting very frustrated. Is there anything I can do?

I'm already taking pregnacare plus, I usually track ovulation using opks, DTD every day during the week leading up to ovulation and then for a good couple of days after.

Things I've started for this month (cd 4) agnus castus and evening primrose oil. Planning on temping once af is finished.

Shall I start aspirin too? I tried to talk to my GP about it all, but he was pretty useless and just kept on telling me it hadn't been long and that it'd probably happen when I wasn't so stressed why can't they take my concerns seriously?

I'm sure my periods have been lighter since my ERPC and I don't get anywhere near as much EWCM. Surely that is an indication that something is up or different? How can I fix it? I'll try anything!!

I hadn't heard about the scratch before. Something to look into if things go wrong again. MsJuniper I know what you mean and feel the same. Maybe - hopefully - it's common to feel this way around this time???

Grumpy I know exactly how you feel. It's so hard isn't it. I'm not sure I can say anything to make it better becuse if you're anything like me, the only thing that will fix it is a bfp. I do hope this a successful month for you, keep going, make nice plans for each day and that'll help take your mind off it.

Double I wouldn't try aspirin unless it is advised medically - it's more to keep a pregnancy if you are prone to clotting.

Have you read It Starts With The Egg? I followed the advice in that for the cycles before I got this BFP. Who knows whether it helped but if nothing else it gives a tiny sense of control during a very stressful time.

Thanks @Doublechocolatetiffin sorry to hear it's taking a while for you too. I did try aspirin last cycle but didn't seem to make any difference to anything as still didn't get a BFP! This cycle I have adopted a "fuck it" attitude and some days even skip my vitamins... living on the edge I know plus coffee and alcohol are the only things that make me happy right now so not bloody giving them up only to get AF again!