Trying to conceive...8

[Azure]

Come and join me in this new thread. I want a least one graduate per week and no ttcing to take longer than two months for everyone here!!

I'm in the same boat Azure, cd 32, 12 dpo, and going to Frankfurt for the weekend to stay with friends...
However, I can't bear to get a BFN and feel like I'd be tempting fate if I test tomorrow...
If I'm realistic I know that last month (first month of temping) I had a luteal phase of 12 days, my temps look very similar and I've had no symptoms that can't just be put down to it being nearly time for af.
Trying to convince myself that if af does arrive at least I'll be able to drown my sorrows, rather than keeping it to a few glasses 'just in case', but who am I kidding - I'd love to find out I can't drink this weekend!!

Sorry for duplicating this post on 2 threads.
Looks like Malinki isn't about.
I wanted to ask her personally rather than tempt fate on public board. I am on cd57, cycle been 60days. I tested today, and I have positive result! can't quiet believe it after 18 months of ttc. I have done another different make test and that also +. Malinki suffers from PCOS like me, and I know she had 8 positive tests, which turned out to be wrong, as it was just hormone surge. I wanted to know if her + had been faint or not. Both mine are very very strong and immediate.
I have booked to see my GP tomorrow morning. and I have left a message for my fertilty specialist to call me back, as I am currently on Metformin, and want to know if I should carry on/stop or wait til GP has confirmed?
I am so confused at the moment. I didn't say anything to DH this morning, which was really hard, but I don't want to get his hopes up, only to find it's just a surge.
I really wish malinki was here as she has the exactly the same probs as me, and has been through all this before.
My other huge problem is I am out with friends tomorrow night a big night out, the thing is I normally drink & smoke, if I don't they will know straight away, and I really feel thats tempting fate, especially when I haven't told DH. But then I feel disgusting if I was to smoke & drink after trying so hard ttc. Any advice welcome, but please if I could ask for you to hold back from Congratulations, as I need for it to be confirmed before I can even think of that!

Hi Stacey and I hope that congrats are in order. Don't worry about the Metformin as my specialist told me it has been shown to possible aid in preventing early miscarriages, although I guess they'll stop you taking it. I can't understand how you can get a surge of HCG which is what the test looks for at any other time than a pregnancy? I've also got PCOS and although my hormones have been all over the place I've never heard of that before. And I test all the time!! Good luck honey!

Thanks Beckif. Did you see the "A question" thread? read what Malinki said.
Any suggestions about what I can do about tomorrow night?
Cos my GP isn't going to be able to 100% confirm it tomorrow is he!

StaceyK I really hope you get the news you want from your GP soon.

staceyk, hope congrats are in order need a graduate this week!

Azure, if your last 2 cycles have been 30 days then I would definitely test Saturday morning before you go out as if you are pregnant, you should at least get a faint positive. You can always use the 'on antibiotics' excuse for not drinking or drive instead.

runtus, my cycles got severely messed up after coming off the pill hence the long time actually ttc. The first couple of months were reasonably regular and then it went downhill so I was having periods about every 2 months. Then I managed to get pregnant after 8 months only to have a miscarriage. Cycles are reasonably regular again now so hoping it won't take too long. I really would suggest buying an OPK or temping just to find out roughly when you are ovulating in case your cycles go a bit haywire too.

I am going to take a really positive approach this month and make out that it is my first month of trying hopefully to get some of the excitement back rather than dwelling on the many months of not conceiving. Have been out to buy an OPK and multi vits this morning, have started taking starflower oil again (like evening primrose) and now just waiting for af to go away so me & dh can have some fun

Looking at the posts below other people are putting up with the same thing - this is driving me mad - why oh why are people so damned insensitive? From the moment you get married/hit about 28 people constantly ask when you are going to have a baby (like it is any of their business and because they are so stupid they don't realise that maybe they are talking to someone who is having difficulties conceiving/has just had a m/c and may not really want to discuss it with them) AND constantly assume (and are uncouth enough to ask if) you are pregnant if for one evening you do not drink (again stupid as clearly you do not want to tell all and sundry if you are before 3 mths + clearly if you were and wanted them to know you'd have told them) - it really gets on my nerves that people are so stupid (the statistics re difficulty conceiving are pretty well known) and nosy. When I do (fingers crossed) get pregnant/have a baby I am really going to educate a few people about how insensitive they are - particularly the ones that never get the hint that you don't really want to discuss all this every time you see them!
There, I've let of some of the steam built up since the minute I got married and over the months and months of fending off questions (in particular while going through a m/c).
I wish it would become accepted manners just not to ask about conception plans (a bit like not asking someone's salary etc)

Well said, Lostinparis.

lostinparis, we should all laminate your last post and hand it out to people when they ask!

The worst one for us is MIL. She never stopped asking before we had ds, and now there is never a conversation without 'he needs a brother or sister' or 'it's not good to have just one you know'. She thinks nothing of discussing all this with the entire extended family and all her friends, so we cannot tell her we are ttc or we would never hear the end of it.

Plus, and this is my point mrsflowerpot, why should people put you in a position where you even consider having to tell them you are ttc in order to stop any other questions - surely it should be entirely up to the couple what, if anything, they wish to say on the subject?

Hello, slightly nervous to join this thread yet, as my miscarriage and D&C was only last Wednesday, but lostinparis guided me over here, so I am going to grab a cuppa and have a good read.

I would like to ttc again and know I have to wait for everything to settle down, but its good to get some advice whilst planning.

Thank you lostinparis and hello xxx

lostinparis, completely agree with you. It all just adds to the pressure doesn't it. TBH though, I have asked people before if they will have a baby, have a 2nd baby etc. and then I went through a mc and am finding it hard to conceive again and realise that in fact these questions are just not appropriate most of the time. Sometimes people are not being insensitive just curious and perhaps they feel that you would make a great parent!

Welcome cobweb - sorry to hear about miscarriage. Don't be scared to ask all the questions you like or to share your feelings etc. We're all going through the rollercoaster of ttc.

Hello Cobweb, welcome .

Glad you came over cobweb! There's lots of support here + Azure has guaranteed a conception per week (so all very positive for when you decide your ready to jump on the ttc wagon again).

I know what you mean bluestar although I still think it is misplaced curiosity - even before I started ttc I didn't like people asking when I was going to have a baby (it's a bit when you are a teenager/in your 20s and single and people always ask about boyfriends - it can only make the person uncomfortable!). That said, the reason I'm so riled about this is not the people who are innocently (or stupidly) being curious but re the people who do it because they think it's funny e.g. other evening I went out to dinner with dh and his uncle (+9 other people) and dh's uncle asked me 6 (!!!!!!) times if I was pg (each time smirking and laughing) solely on the basis that I wasn't drinking - each time he asked all I could think was "no actually, I was pregnant last month but this month I'm not (m/c)", kind of ruined my evening (although this is just an example I find it happens a lot) - only thing that keeps me positive is that I am going to make these "funny" guys squirm whenever I do (fingers crossed) have a baby (not least to get off my chest how I felt but also to avoid them doing the same to anyone else).

I always want to turn around and say 'so how's your sex life, since you're so interested in mine'.

On the other hand, some people might tell you!

My Sister has been trying for 10 months now and she is so fed up with people asking. I think people assume that once you are with someone for a while and she got married a year ago, that you automatically are trying for a baby!

I am definately going to wait until things settle at least 1-2 months, but nature will decide in the end

Thank you for making me so welcome xxx

At first I didn't mind people asking about a little brother or sister for my ds but now I feel very self-conscious when they ask as I think they might be able to read the disappointment on my face, maybe not.... I'm ttc since April and know it's not very long, as I'm aware some ladies here are trying much much longer but I think it’s so easy to become obsessed. This Monday is my due date for af and I’m so desperate for a BFP that I even keep checking my breasts (whilst on my own) to see if they are sore yet????????? God help me I need help, but as bluestar said before you just know and if I’m honest I know it’s a BFN………….

Welcome Cobweb and don’t be shy as I was a real greenhorn when I joined and all the ladies are a great support.

LOTS AND LOTS OF BABY DUST TO EVERYONE!!

(you made need to refer to my message of this morning)I have just spoken to my fertility specialist, and she has said if positive test then I definately am, I mentioned Malinki's case to her, and she said nope defo am???
Still a bit caucious, the best bit is if I go there first thing tomorrow morning the hospital that is, she'll leave a form for me to have blood test, and they should be able to call me in the afternoon to let me know, how far they think I am, and book in for scan!!! I can't believe it she made it sound so real!
Malinki I really need you!! Also even more confused what to do about tomorrow night now!

Big Congrats Stacyk - I think I'm ok saying that now!

Ohh Staceyk I actually held my breath reading your message!!!! so delighted for you

WELL DONE!!

Congratulations StaceyK! Looks like we may have this week's graduate - do tell us the news tomorrow afternoon.

Thank you very much, although I'm still not believing it, Malinki's experience is still strongly in my mind. I won't really believe it until I'm told by a real person, other than a piece of plastic. I'm not going to say anything to DH until I hear from hospital tomorrow, and I'm out tomorrow night and he's at his parents so all being well I should break the news to him Saturday.
I'm just very impressed & relieved that I will find out for sure 100% tomorrow I thought I had a long wait ahead of me.
This is when you truly realise how great mumsnet is, when you can't talk to anyone else.
I thank you all.
Afraid you'll all have to wait until Monday for the offical verdict though

Bluestar, Dh is really against temping this early on so I think I will stick with the 'natural' route for another month or so. If nothing after that, I'll start on the whole Ov testing and temping thing....

Hopefully I'll be lucky before then. How is it all my mates happened to fall pregnant whilst still on the pill if it is this hard to do it deliberately!!?