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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

TTC for 10 months or more, and now we're moving onto thread 4! Ten plussers welcome!

998 replies

MPP81 · 05/04/2016 01:12

Thread for anyone TTC for over ten months. Please feel free to join us!

Took the liberty of starting a new thread (with what is obviously a brilliant piece of rhyme!) as I assume everyone else is sleeping peacefully right now :)

OP posts:
star1980 · 26/04/2016 14:46

Hello ladies,

It's been such a long time since I posted so apologies for the silence. I've been busy with work and weekends away. Hen in Gothenburg was great thanks - a bit cold and wet but boozy and fun, which is a positive of infertility I guess Hmm

Stealth - congratulations!! This is super exciting and I'm delighted there's yet more positive news on our lovely thread. All seems to be going well.

Brenna - sorry I never congratulated you on your bfp and now have to give congrats qualified with a big cross of the fingers that the bleeding I s nothing to worry about. I truly hope there is a happy healthy baby in 9 months for you. I know it's no comfort but it does sound like you're in a good place for tests etc and great you have a proactive GP.

Banana, so glad you have a plan and I must say that sounds cast iron. Do you want to go ahead with the hycosy/scratch or would your u rather wait til nearer the transfer even if that does mean the levels haven't dropped to zero? (Hmm, have I got that the right way round?) I'm so sorry you're still bloody preggers, it is beyond cruel.

Mpp, you must be super excited! The very excellent thing about not being pregnant yet is that you can drink on your hen and at your wedding. Enjoy your hen and the final bits of wedding panning.

Trixie, oh my you are sooooo close! Hope you're feeling super excited. And happy birthday! I started trying shortly after I turned 34. I will turn 36 in 4 months - surely I'm supposed to have a baby now?

Boris, hi! Hope all is still going well. How far along are you now?

Sammy, hi! How are your u down no? Did you decide on immune testing?

Lucie - thinking of you. Hoping you get a negative test soon in time for a fet before your hols.

Maple, Rebecca - hi and welcome to the thread! I think you've been here a while but I haven't given your u a welcome. Good luck with the hycosy maple - I really want one but haven't been offered one as we have male factor, but I still want to know whether there's any point having hope whilst we try naturally. Rebecca, not long till you start now. I will be doing my first ivf cycle in July I think. Losing the will to live in the meantime if I'm honest.

Waves to everyone else.

As for me, this whole thing is really getting me down, after a few months of calm this year. My best friend texted me last night to tell me she's pregnant with number two. I'd asked her (when our other friend announced on our way to the tube) to tell me by text/email and I'm really grateful she listened to that. Both of those are big drinking, super skinny 36 year olds and are instantly up the duff. I feel so so unlucky, but somehow didn't cry this time - I think it's easier if you can just process your emotions and not have to pretend to be delighted and suppress all the sadness you're feeling.

My next consultant appointment is next Friday. Period due on Wednesday and I'm going to be distraught by the time the appointment comes. I've turned back into a ttc obsessive these last few weeks and read everything online and all the forums about male factor infertility. People have it so much worse (e.g. Can you imagine a SA coming back as NO SPERM?) that I think we aren't so bad, surely we must be preggers by now. And the I think there must be something wrong with me.

I read on another thread that having asthma could indicate immune issues although I don't know whether that's nonsense (I've been asthmatic since childhood). So now I'm wondering about immunes testing and driving myself insane.

3 women at work are due to go on mat leave in September. My boss was like: there must be something in the water. Yeah, not mine! I can't look at them as their bumps grow as it makes me want to cry.

Oh wow, sorry for the brain dump ladies. Do you think perhaps I have finally lost it? I do feel a bit unhinged if I'm honest.

bananafish81 · 26/04/2016 15:02

Quick update, will do personals later, but hCG is in...........at over 6, yes that's 6, ladies and gentleman, weeks post ERPC, my hCG is......89.

89 FFS.

Which means it has come down an incredibly rubbish 57% in 11 days

So yeah. Hysto confirmed for tomorrow. Done under a general as it's a surgical rather than diagnostic procedure

Please, please, please let there be nothing sinister going on in there, and once I've had a clean and polish please, please can my levels return to zero so I can finally end the neverending miscarriage.

And get on and start stims!!!

maplebaby · 26/04/2016 15:41

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maplebaby · 26/04/2016 15:42

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maplebaby · 26/04/2016 15:42

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maplebaby · 26/04/2016 15:42

Hi star I've only been on for a few days but already everyone is being super nice and knowledgable! Thanks re Hycosy - actually more worried about the suppositories! Silly I know!

I know how you feel about baby bombs and work etc - we have had 2 go on mat leave recently and another 2 to go next month. I've been trying before all of them!! Everyone was saying the same thing "must be something in the water" - errr where can I find this water because I clearly missed the memo!

Glad your friend sent you a message too like you asked. DHs siblings are getting married soon and I'm hoping I will be pregnant before they are (pregnant not married)... Is that really selfish?!

Hope the consultant appointment goes well - I have mine next week too. Do you know what they want to discuss or is it a "catch up" type one?

Oh banana I'm sorry about the results. Did they say why it might be going down slowly? Also what is a hysto and stims? Clueless sorry Blush

Brenna24 · 26/04/2016 18:37

Hi Star. Glad your friend was as tactful as she could be. Best of luck with your appointment. I wish it was as fecking easy as drinking a glass of water.

Banana, that sucks. I hope that tomorrow's procedure works.

Itsme247 · 26/04/2016 19:26

Banana all the best for tomorrow and you star! Just had my third smear in a year, urgh they're awful but they won't (quite obviously) put embryo's back if I need treatment for the pre-cancer cells, so fingers crossed its not got worse. The 'wait and see' is so annoying, all I do is wait.

star1980 · 26/04/2016 19:27

Good luck for your hysto tmrw banana - hope it all goes well and your hcg is zero very soon. This really is never-ending, you poor thing Flowers

maple yes I can imagine the suppositories must be weird. I remember having to take some for thrush when I was about 19, it was so odd but I figure for ttc all the discomfort is worth it if it works!
It's not selfish to hope you get pregnant first (well it is a bit but it's a totally normal reaction when you've been trying as long as we have). The way I see it, we're just wanting to be happy for our friends and family when they give us their good news. If I were pregnant myself then I'd be freed from all this sadness and wallowing and selfishly always thinking of how I'm not pregnant whenever anyone announces that they are. So quite selfless really Wink

Thanks Brenna and Maple. This is my second appointment. At the first we were given our male factor diagnosis (normal count, low motility 18%, low morphology 2%), told to try proxeed for 4-6 months and then ivf if that doesn't work. So next week marks 4 months since that so I figure we'll be planning the ivf as it hasn't worked so far. I'm really scared as my next period means ivf is finally here. Was so hoping we wouldn't have to, but it's now been 18 months so I have to face facts I guess.

loopylou1984 · 26/04/2016 19:34

Baby bombed again. Remember that couple I told you about where the girl was upset because they'd been trying 2 months and they weren't pregnant? Yeah them. 4 months after they said that. Which means they conceived after 3 months of trying. Poor them.
I'd already called it as they bailed out of a night out because she was ill, but this really hurts. I think it's because I really like this couple, and now I won't want to see them anymore.
I wouldn't wish infertility on anyone, but if 1 in 6 couples have problems conceiving then why aren't any of my friends that one? Why just me? I feel so lonely in this, we're not going to have any friends left soon.

Sorry not to reply to anyone. I will when I'm in a better mood. Xx

BorisIsBack · 26/04/2016 20:28

Banana - best of luck for tomorrow.

Sammy I'm so sorry you feel like this Flowers

Pikz · 26/04/2016 20:47

Banana good luck for tomorrow

Sammy it is really really hard. Also remember some of the stories are never told. Only my very very closest friends have any idea what we have been through to have a child. Most people have no idea to the point that the thought it was an accident as we weren't married. It's only now that I am far more upfront and honest about the struggles. One girl in our NCT group has had both of hers through IVF and I am the only person who knew. I know it doesn't make it easier and we will always be baby bombed. Big hugs X

JustTrixie · 26/04/2016 21:35

I know it feels lonely Sammy but you have us.

Lovely to hear from you Star, sorry to hear you're having a tough time though. Yes, very excited about starting treatment! Not long at all for you now.

Thanks Maple, happy birthday to you too, it's a busy time for birthdays!

Good luck for tomorrow Banana.

loopylou1984 · 27/04/2016 07:12

Thank you everyone, sorry to be the moan you one. I think the announcement coinciding with AFs arrival is what did it. I can't say I feel happy for them, but I'm in a better place this morning.

Maple - don't worry about the suppositories, they're fine. Especially if it's just 1 or 2. I take it you have to put them in the 'back entrance'? This worried me too, but once I did it I realised I'd been worrying for nothing. After my egg collection they put one in there for me... Thank god for the sedative Blush

Oh Banana - that's so annoying. Good luck for today, keeping my fingers crossed for you that this is the last of it!

Star - lovely to see you, but sorry you're feeling low. It's really hard isn't it. There's something in everyone else's water at my work too. People keep saying that to me.
I'm not doing the immunes yet. My consultant was adamant that he didn't think 2 failed cycles meant we should go down that expensive route yet. So I've agreed to try a fresh transfer (we haven't done that yet) with extra estrogen if possible to thicken my lining more.

Trixie - exciting for you! I always feel so much better when actively doing something rather than waiting around. Good luck!

Brenna - I'm sorry about the bleeding. Glad you have such a proactive GP though.

Maple - it should be mid twenties, I cannot wait. It's just what we need!

Rebecca - what Lucie said re scans. I haven't had a NHS round yet, but scans will def be required!

Lucie - glad the tests are going in the right direction. Fx you can get started on something soon! Xx

Brenna24 · 27/04/2016 08:32

Best of luck today Banana. I have everything crossed for you.

stealthbanana · 27/04/2016 16:45

Hope everything went ok banana

I got my second beta back. Hcg was nice and strong at 847, so a textbook 48hr double which is good. But my progesterone has gone DOWN slightly. Have had my fanny candle dose upped from 2x to 3x a day, but am wondering what it all means....

stealthbanana · 27/04/2016 19:11

Just found out my progesterone hasn't gone down slightly, it's gone down A LOT. It was 83 on Monday and 27 today Shock

Am hoping all is fine, just need to sit tight and hope the test caught me at a low moment of absorption.

Brenna24 · 27/04/2016 19:12

Yikes Stealth I hope it is just a blip.

lucieloos · 27/04/2016 19:18

Stealth, what has your consultant said about the progesterone? Hopefully should be ok now you've upped the suppositories.

Banana, hope all went well for you today. Have been thinking of you.

Sammy, sorry for another baby bomb. You've had a rough time of it lately.

I have my next blood test tomorrow and also our nhs follow up so will be interesting to hear what they have to say.

stealthbanana · 27/04/2016 19:18

Yes me too brenna. I don't think it is the same as eg your hcg levels going down ie progesterone rise doesn't drive pregnancy. And if the level stayed at 27 it'd be absolutely fine (I think anything over 20 is normal and anything over 15 is sustainable). It's just the drop! 😳

stealthbanana · 27/04/2016 19:19

How are you feeling? Has the bleeding stayed away? X

loopylou1984 · 27/04/2016 20:16

Thanks Lucie. I'm ok, it's just hard not to feel a bit 'woe is me' sometimes.

Stealth - echoing what Lucie said, fx that the extra sup does the trick.... When do you have to do that one? On your lunch break?! Shock
Scary for you though I'm sure. Why can't the post bfp part at least be straight forward for people after horrific ttc journeys. Xx

lucieloos · 27/04/2016 20:30

I know how you feel Sammy. It was so much easier with the bfp when people at work were incessantly talking about their babies all the time knowing I had that little secret. It's just so tiring all this and I agree if only the part after the bfp were easier for those with fertility issues but it's definitely no less stressful unfortunately.

Brenna24 · 27/04/2016 21:07

The bleeding was heavy and clotted all day yesterday and moderate all day today. I really think it is all over. Even worse I went back to work and popped my head around my boss' office door to let him know I was back and that it wasn't good news and he told me that he and his wife were expecting a baby in July. He was really apologetic about telling me then and there but he knew that others of the bosses knew and he was worried that the rumour mill would reach me. They hadn't said before as they lost one last year and his wife didn't want to tell anyone until after the anatomy scan. He was so upset telling me like that but I managed to keep a smile on my face and say congratulations and reassure him that he was allowed to have good news, then I went back to my office and cried. I kind of wish I hadn't gone back in today now. It was all a bit raw to deal with stuff like that. However I would have had to throw out experiments had I not. This evening I am crampy and sore, plus achy from this cold I have and totally and utterly exhausted to the core. I am on short days this week though as the boss wants me to try and take it easy.

RebeccaNoodles · 27/04/2016 22:14

Brenna, I'm so sorry. I can't think of anything to say that isn't useless but wanted you to know I was thinking of you. Thanks