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[BorisIsBack]

All aboard the bumsnet bus!

This bus if for anyone genuinely ttc, for anyone just starting on the tTC journey or thoes who have been trying for years.

No entry requirements, only that you join in supporting us all to destination BFP.

Typical about the holiday/AF arriving Squish! Enjoy your holiday though - hope you have a great time.

Welcome Jod Hopefully your TTC journey will be short! Exciting times..

Interesting reading about the SA tests..I'm looking forward to DP having his but also a bit worried. Either way, I guess it's best to know.

Ha, DizzyN, yes switching off is easier said than done. Your plan makes sense...are you still using your microscope? Mine is currently gathering dust.

Magpie the day has started the same as yesterday so it seems like I'm on a roll I hope there will be a lot of gratitude from your DH!

How are you getting on DizzyM? Have you tested again? I'm still waiting for AF to rock up..

Good luck with the 2ww Nurse, its such a drag.

Hello to everyone else!

I'm so sorry sammy. Huge supportive hugs to you both.

Jod hello

No news here. The only thing that's slightly different is I've had constant CM that's thicker creamer than normal, since I think I ov had Ewcm. I'm 10dpo and not even tempted to poas. We Dtd every other day so I have no idea.

Sammy, I feel devastated for you and I know that is nothing compared to how utterly defeated you'll be feeling. You will recover, though, and move on to more positive protocols and/or clinic. I honestly thought family were paying for you to go private...or is that a private cycle you've just done? I've heard great things about CARE in the UK. We're you happy with Create? Did you use the embryoscope?

Don't despair, Sammy, and don't give up xxx

Sammy, I can see you've just had a private round; are family paying for that one and no more? I understand. Don't write off the NHS, love. Will you have a FET with the other embryo you made?

Sammy and hugs for you today.

bird that you timed it right!

I'm very confused now, spotting has stopped completely so I don't know! Didn't dtd last night cos I was feeling rough. Regretting that now!!

Thanks everyone, I know we'll get over it, it's just right now it feels a bit 'what's the point'. I feel like I don't really have a purpose in life. Yes I have an ok job, but it's just a job, I don't want a career, I want a family. I'm sorry, I was going to stay away until I could be a bit more positive on here, but wanted to reply to you all.

Purdey - yes this was a medicated FET of one of our frozen blasts. Yes we used the embryos cope, but despite that now have had two failed FETs. We now have 3 left, but if we do another private then we will lose our NHS entitlement so have to go that route. The NHS won't let us use our private frozens so we have to start again with injections and egg collection :(. I'm terrified of getting ohss again, and also scared that if they lower the dose to prevent this then I won't produce enough. We only got 5 blasts out of 18 eggs collected.

DizyN - I don't even know about the success rates. I just feel at the moment that it's never going to happen.

Sorry I haven't responded to anyone else's posts, I just can't right now. Xx

Oh sammy my heart goes out to you. I can't even begin to imagine how you are feeling so all I will do is offer virtual hugs and say I am thinking of you and praying for you.

To everyone else - hugs and again sorry for not catching up properly - STILL in hospital and going slightly mad by now.

I really really pray we all get our BFPs soon xxxxx

Sammy please don't feel like you have to be positive or do anything else. Right now just do what you need to do to take care of yourself. We're all here for you whenever you need us

Blueberry you poor thing! Are they any closer to figuring out the bladder problems? I hope they let you go home soon. Have some virtual and

Squish sorry your body is messing with you (mine does that a lot too!) I hope it makes it's mind up soon.

Bird I think the EOD thing is the best approach. We try to do that too but it can be difficult to keep up with on long cycles. When are you testing?

Genghis enjoy your second lazy day! DH has been very grateful for the help but I've had fun too. I'll be leaving him for a few hours at his busiest time today to go watch football though

AF arrived for me this morning (my temp went right down to 35.56 which I'm pretty sure is a record for me!). I'm obviously a little bit disappointed but after several days of PMT and cramps it's good to know I wasn't imagining it. It's a 25 day cycle, short but closer to normal (whatever that is) than I usually get.

Sammy big hugs lovely. Don't worry about responding to posts just look after yourselves. We're all here to listen and handhold whenever you need us

Blueberry sorry you're still in hospital. Have you had any treatment for your bladder yet? Hope they get you sorted soon.

Bird I'm keeping my go for you.

Ghengis it's a definite bfn as expected! Your lazy weekend sounds like bliss to me. My family were round yesterday and my sisters didn't leave until 1am! I've had 4 hours sleep and I'm shattered but off to see my in laws today when all I want to do is crawl into bed again!

Magpie sorry for AF but it's a good thing your cycle length has increased. Fx this cycle is the one.

As for us we've had a chat and decided that as well as DH having SA tests I should get some tests done too so we're having a fertility assessment. We were going to have these last year at CARE fertility but managed to conceive. They still have our details on their system (tried to fill in the form online but a message came up to say they already have our details) and I'll
make the appointment tomorrow. After ttc for 2
years I just don't see the point of plodding along like this expecting a miracle!

Sammy Be gentle with yourself and take all the time you need. Also, don't feel you have to be positive here - what you've been through is shit, and you're entitled to feel how you feel.

Blueberry I can't believe you're still in hospital - you must have your own bed there! I hope they are getting closer to sorting out your bladder issues.

FX Bird! When is your BFP due?

Sorry about AF Magpie but good that it's been a more normal cycle. It seems the meds are working, which is great news. Hope your team won by the way!

Party in the DizzyM household! Sounds like a fun night (apart from the 4 hours sleep - yikes). Sorry about the BFN, but I like your proactive move in regards to testing etc. Hopefully it'll all start happening soon.

My news is that AF arrived this morning - I'm okay about it but I was just working out that since DP is away during my next fertile period (and probably the next one as well) there's no chance of a baby before Christmas. I'm so sick of having to move my goalposts. Last year, I thought(wanted) I'd have a baby by Christmas 2015, then I changed it to being pregnant by Christmas, and now I can see the whole thing happening again for this coming Christmas. Grumble. Sorry if my rant doesn't make sense

Ghengis - right there with you on the Christmas thing. I've been thinking it since Xmas 2014. Now it is impossible (aside from a miracle natural conception) for me to give birth before Xmas 2016. TBH I'm starting to think it's impossible for me to conceive at all. What is wrong with my body?

I know I need to stop setting targets, it really doesn't help. Xx

blueberry how are you getting on? Hope they are sitting you out you poor thing.

DizzyM definitely go for tests, it's good to know what's going on with your body.

gengis sorry for AF. for the last two Christmases I dreamed I would have a baby and was heartbroken when I didn't. It's bloody tough.

*Sitting? Sorting!!! Bloody MN mobile.

Thanks for the welcome everyone. I'm really nervous about getting the coil out on Wednesday. I'm afraid it will be embedded as I have read loads of people saying theirs was. Anyone here had The Mirena before TTC?

Stonker of a positive opk this morning CD54

Problem is we've got a 160 mile car journey today and I feel rough as anything with a dodgy stomach. It's gonna take some major effort to dtd today!!

What's an OPK?

Ovulation pack

You're right about not setting targets Sammy but sometimes it's hard not to - it feels like something to aim for, and takes the pressure off the immediacy so to speak. Will you get to have a talk with your doctors about this cycle, and what they think might have happened/suggested changes?

Sorry, no mirena experience here Jod but hoping that yours isn't embedded. Fx for you for Wednesday.

That is unfortunate timing Squish but really hope you feel well enough later on to dtd.

How are you feeling Boris?

Sorry AF has arrived ghengis. Also sorry to hear you'll miss your fertile window too. It's frustrating but you will get there.

Sammy be kind to yourself you've had a rough
ride. Will you be having a review meeting with your consulatant?

Jod no experience with the mirena either but hopefully yours won't be embedded.

Hope you feel better soon and can manage to dtd squish.

How are you feeling boris? Is it sinking in yet?

I have booked an appointment with CARE Fertility for next Wednesday. I will be having AMH bloods and a transvaginal scan on the day and DH will have his SA test. I can't wait to find out what's going on but I'm equally as nervous that I've got
no eggs left

Jod. I had mine taken out during a general so I can't help with the feeling part of having it taken out but it came out without any problems apparently.

sammy. I think it's almost impossible not to think about the what ifs. If this is the cycle it would mean that pil would have both grandchildren with them at Christmas. Our nephew is 6 months but is in America. I've started to think of aims as daydreams. Although I do keep thinking I could be a mum at 32.

Genghis sorry about the unwanted visitor.

I'm still having more than normal cm. It is ranging from ewcm to lotion like white cm. I have also had some pretty extreme endo flare pains this morning. Today has been the first time since my lap I've needed to use persrciption painkillers since the lap.

I'm going to hold out testing until Friday. I just don't have the vibes with this cycle

Hey all, I'm lurking around still.

DizzyM - yeah I will have a review with the consultant. Will arrange this after OTD. I guess the appointment will be in a couple of weeks. Xx

Keeping my fx for you bird.

AF has arrived as expected. I'm almost relieved she's here as the bfn was tormenting me. We can now look forward to a new cycle and I have decided to start temping again.

Hi all,

I have a load of this chat to catch up on, I'm just back from my holibobs.

On cd14 getting a s**t load of ewcm for last couple of days and started cramping in lower right. Last few months have been left so here's hoping it's a good sign. Doubt it. Not doing opks or temping etc just going with the flow.

Hope you're all well xxx

Kellz yay for EWCM! Hope you had a great holiday.

DizzyM sorry for AF even though it was expected. All the best for this cycle and good luck for the tests!

Sammy good to see you lurking about. I agree that setting targets just adds stress, it's so hard not to do it though.

Bird sorry to hear about the pain. When is AF due? I hope you're feeling better today.

Genghis sorry for AF and for the upcoming missing of fertile periods! It's virtually impossible not to have those targets at the back of your mind though isn't it? Amazing the way our brains can add extra pressure.

Squish I hope you managed to get some DTD action in after that positive opk.

Jod I've not had any experience of the coil.
Is there any reason you think it might be embedded? I'd talk to your doctor about your concerns before the removal. Hope it goes well!

I'm CD3, the bleeding is fairly light and I'm hoping it won't stick around again. Booked in for acupuncture on Thursday.