We are all a bit bonkers, worshipping the travelling womble conker, we rub the grad's bumps for luck and shag without scientific schmuck (Most of the time!) Its Just Shagging 56!

[MyBlackCat]

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.
5. Thou shalt not be offended by the word vagina.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also known as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a Kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit), or PIATLH (Tea light holder), PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage (Self explanatory)

ROC = Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Optional decorations include photographs of controversial political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Jizz in a bra = how we transport the jizz to the Sperm Queen

Shagging like Something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into TTC obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband (or Cuntraband) = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

SOTM = Shagger of the Month. Awarded with varying regularity to those viroids who go above and beyond EOD shagging in pursuit of that BFP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A Lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

Miroid - The male compadre of a viroid

Cat - Compulsory

Skittletits - Killer molten painful tits and nipples

Ghost jizz/goat jazz - When the amazing foof sucks up all the jizz - achieved when coming at the same time/nearly the same time.

The link to Part 55 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2485718-Were-Still-Gathered-Round-the-Sacred-Womble-Conker-for-a-Legendary-BFP-Bring-your-Fur-Babies-and-Pray-for-Merely-a-Hint-of-Menses-its-Just-Shagging-with-science-sometimes-55" target="_blank">HERE</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2505402-Its-the-dream-combo-of-carbs-and-couples-massagers-welcoming-pukey-newbies-and-teffrifying-norks-its-GTTs-a-go-go-on-JS-Grads-41" target="_blank">HERE</a>

The current Mumming Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/2490199-just-mumming-9-we-re-suffering-the-curse-of-mel-b-st-syndrome-and-the-rise-of-the-sleep-snatchers-we-ve-all-had-enough-and-would-just-like-a-good-js" target="_blank">HERE</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-website-s-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">HERE</a>

The brilliantly pearl-clutchy Fred about 'how wooode' our Fred is darlings is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/site_stuff/2386412-Thread-titles" target="_blank">HERE</a>

Stats sheet is <a class="break-all" href="https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/14Ap3NlZ0dP2Rjd1tRdpZ58my-7vZ-oUhevZ-4JROvyg/edit?pli=1#gid=0" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">HERE</a>

Recent research PROVING WE ARE RIGHT is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2015-10/iu-iss100515.php" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">HERE</a>

We are the dark side of MN... Welcome!

corgi we started trying a month after our missed mc, but had had medical management and an infection so had to wait for an all clear. After the chemical I just had we didn't wait at all, although my cycle has been messed up by it and I don't think I iced this month.

holo I've had that too, Dr said nothing to worry about. I'll hope for it again if it is a good sign .

just gx for you anyway, I love the image of the cat getting an eyeful!

The hideous witch I have just had has finally gone, and am now on cd7. Just tried to get the cape on and DH told me I wasn't being romantic and has gone to try and fix the coffee machine! Little does he know how dedicated we need to be this month....

Aw cats this mc malarkey sucks eh.
Haha just you cat-flasher!
holo thanks Rhubarb is the light of my life/best furbaby ever etc etc. I got some ovulation spotting the month I got pregnant. Gx this is a lucky sign for you!
fuzzy have you POAFRER?
Nfmv: heavyish bleeding and cramps but still no "products".

Also big gx London
And go ain! waves pompoms

I POAFRER on Christmas Day corgi but don't have anymore and have settled for the IC I have leftover since. My new year resolution is to stop POAS so I can't buy anymore! I was 9/10 dpo on Christmas Day but am sure that if I was pregnant enough for morning sickness, I would be pregnant enough for a positive test. I have just managed to worry myself about an ectopic after reading Dr Google - and let's be honest, Dr Google never tells you to woman up and stop being a hypercondriac!!

FuzzyOwl I don't know what your weird period means but 9 days post ovulation is way too early to draw any conclusions from a test. If you are still having symptoms at the end of the week, test again I'd say.

Thanks everyone for the gx and just for the legs crossed! I'm neither optimistic nor pessimistic this cycle. We shagged for England both during the flashing smiley and static smiley and I know I ovulated as I temp. Still I don't have any strong symptoms (except that I can't shit without Dulcolax- I've had to take it over the last several days or nothing happens!!)

I have major work dilemmas that are keeping me preoccupied which is nice :)

Ain while my BMI is technically in the normal / healthy range, I've gained like 20 pounds in the last year and a half and most people who haven't seen me in a while already think I'm pregnant as I used to be quite thin. I'm trying to loose weight too so you have my sympathy but it seems wrong to deprive my body too much while TTC. I'm sure you'll be able to shift the weight you need too before the FC and get clomid and its really positive you think you ovulated naturally!

I'll let you all know the results tomorrow of my FRER. I'm testing with FMU at 12 days post ovulation so a touch early. If not pregnant I'm going to get properly pissed at my friends NYE party :)

Thanks London and good luck tomorrow - the only reason I tested at 9/10 dpo was because that is the length of my LP and when I have had positives on both previous times I have been pregnant. Am 14/15 dpo today, so think anything would show. I probably just have some sickness bug but at least it has reminded me that pregnancy is not all great.

Oh wow, that a short LP. I don't know your history so sorry if this is a really insensitive question but have you ever spoken to anyone about it?

Hi, new to the thread.. Only on cycle 2 but have been js every day on the grounds that it seemed like a good idea.. Lost the will the last two nights though and now 17dpo so pretty pissed off at myself for probably (knowing my luck) missing this cycle!

Have tried to use Ovia but it just says it can't calculate anything - what am I doing wrong?! Is the temp the most important bit?

That's ok London and no, I haven't spoken to anyone about specifically that, but it has always been the same length. My cycle length has varied, but my LP never changes. It did come up when I spoke to a specialist when I was diagnosed with endometriosis but she didn't seem to think anything of it. However, I have got pregnancy twice before and both times within three cycles of trying, so I suspect a doctor would not be overly interested as it doesn't appear to impact my fertility.

Hi Epilepsy. I didn't get on very well with Ovia as I think it guesses and bases you on a average. Your temperature is definitely the most important thing to check whether you have ovulated or not. Every other day up until CD15 might be ok, and no harm in carrying on tonight for a while. Do you know when you tend to ovulate? Lots of apps will say it is cd14 whereas for me it is usually cd21, so I would stop long before my fertile time if I was relying on what they say.

Hi ladies, can I ask a quick question?

I usually have 29-31 day cycles, I'm always regular and ovulate around CD 17.

Here's the thing, since CD 9 (as soon as my AF was off), I've had super fertile, clear and stretchy CM. I'm now on CD 12 and its still the same!

I know I'm not ovulating, but what's going on here? I've never had fertile CM this early on. What's more, I've read you can get a progesterone increase after AF is done which can cause it.

But AF is well and truly past for ages and I'm not getting any thick CM, just fertile?

Thank you for taking a look!

Do you take evening primrose oil Booking because I get similar when I take it? Otherwise I am afraid that I have no idea, but would recommend dtd every other day to make sure.

Thanks Corgi, it's been pretty crap. It wouldn't have been anything you did. I've always found comfort in blaming the little one(s) - and most isolated MCs are related to lethal abnormalities that have been there all along. Others don't like to think that way - each with their own way of coping.

Just! Flashing the cats

Think you're right, Fuzzy, if you've got pregnancy sickness, you should get a BFP.

I'm not one to advise on weird cycles - mine are all over the shop. But I will throw out the old BFP on CD36 line to offer a little hope.

Good luck for the morning London :)

FuzzyOwl that's great its been so easy for you before!

Hi Epilepsy Yes, your temp spiking by at the least 0.2 degrees for at least 3 days in a row is the surest sign of ovulation. The next best is using OPKs which detect the LH surge just before ovulation (but having an LH surge doesn't guarantee you've ovulated though its very likely). The calendar method isn't very reliable for a lot of women have different luteal phase lengths and follicular phases.

How long is your cycle normally. DTD that much for 17 days should hopefully give you a good shot if your cycles aren't very long normally.

GX for you!

Fuzzy nope, not taking anything apart from Folic Acid. DP is away fishing until CD 16 so no DTD to be sure

The witch arrived - at least she didn't ruin my birthday

Promise I'll read back soon but can someone look at my day 3 results as I'm basically freaking out as they look horrendous based on google....

Fsh 10.9
Lh 81
Testosterone 0.7
Prolactin 547

So based on my googling I think my prolactin looks ridiculously high, testosterone isn't enough and the ratio of fsh and lh is too high.

Thoughts? Someone tell me I'm wrong....

Thanks London and Fuzzy* guess I should start taking my temperature.. I was so naive about all this, you spend so many years thinking one tiny contraception slip and you're going to be in trouble..!

fuzzy gx for your bfp. So sorry what happened corgi

Epilepsy you don't have to. Lot's of people don't. But if you don't normally DTD every other day through your entire cycle it can help you focus you attention during your fertile period. When I first got pregnant I didn't track anything so its totally optional.

just I am so sorry but I have no idea. Do step away from Google though - no good research or outcome is ever found on there when you are worrying about something.

I don't temp Epilsepy as I wake up too many times in the night to get a true reading. I (sometimes) rely on OPKs, chin spots (very reliable for me, including down to which ovary I ovulate from) and general ovarian-area pains.

Just I'm so sorry your results have you freaked out! I asked my sister who had fertility testing but the measures for the LH and prolactin might be different. Can you ring the clinic? Its crazy they'll give you the results before speaking to you about what it means.

Sorry I meant how they are measured in the US might be different from here in the UK...

Don't google Just. Them's my thoughts. It depends a little on the lab, and on the units as to how normal/abnormal they are. On the face of it, if they are the same normal ranges as I've encountered, then yes the PrL is high. That normally sends your LH/FSH down though, so I wouldn't worry just yet. When can you get in to talk to someone about it?

Hi Epilepsy! I don't temp. It's not essential in order to conceive but if you CBA to shag EOD then it can help to focus in.

Yeah, its less stressful for me to know I don't HAVE to have sex after I've ovulated. We still DTD after I've iced but its way more fun-- purely recreational and spontaneous for the rest of my cycle and bjs are back on the menu as we don't during procreational sex as saliva might be a spermicide if you believe doctor google...

Other people find temping and OPKs make things more stressful so just go with what feels best for you.

just I can't offer anything constructive apart from don't google.

london good luck for tomorrow.

I can't keep up with all the posts from everyone but I promise I do read them all

corgi hope you're doing ok

Still no witch for me. Day 42. Some serious pains today though so fingers crossed its on its way.

just I did t have day 3 tests so can't comment on the results. What I will say is 1) did a Dr give you them or receptionist? 2)even the Dr gave my dh the wrong numbers on his sa. Gps often don't understand these results too well 3) don't worry, its progress regardless of the results because you are getting answers and moving forward.
Have you had day 21 test done? If not can you ask them if they are also doing amh. Might give you a fuller picture as its thought to indicate ovarian reserve, though there is some backtracking on that now I think. Pm me if you want to chat x