TTC and still breastfeeding? Thread # 5 - Positive Vibes!

[peardrop2]

Peardrop - age 33, TTC cycle #9, DS is 26 months (stopped bf soon to be 4 months ago). Af returned when DS 14months, currently on CD14 and have had 4 flashing smileys. Praying for a static smiley tomorrow! Dangling legs in air!

I have came to the conclusion that the only way to get pregnant is to wean completely. I had a chemical last month and tried again this month, but nothing. I am so fed up now, as timing has now caught up with me. So I don't know what to do, if owns to continue trying to get pregnant I would have to go back to work when the baby would only be 6 months and I just think this is too young. So now the alternative is to wait 6 months or just accept my family as it is now. I am so torn and so upset.

My Ds is 18 months and I have been getting a lot of judgemental comments this week about still breastfeeding him and how ridiculous it is that I can't go out at night. So on top of listening to all these comments my heart is breaking as I know it is probably the reason why I haven't conceived but at the same time I love the closeness that I have with my ds. I just don't want to upset him and force weaning on him.

Hi jpclarke that sounds hard and sorry about your chemical I think you should try your best to ignore negative comments, I've had one or two but I know I've done my best for my dd so try to ignore but it is hard. Maybe you could try weaning slowly? I've recently dropped one feed through distracting her and she's been fine.

Dtd last night when DH got back and afterwards (sorry for tmi ) there was some pink blood.... Then nothing this morning. I'm sure this is going to be the start of af as our timing was crap this week but my body is playing mind games a bit cos I am now of course wondering if it was implantation!! It was only 7dpo yesterday so if I do get af today I will be worried about 7 day luteal phase! Hope you all have a wonderful Friday

Hi all how we doing ?
Expatvet hope your little one is better now
Yeah laceylee from the people I have talked to MPA is more common that I ever thought fingers crossed lo grows out of it. Must be hard when your little one is intolerant to soya too .
Glad you got some adult time got my fingers crossed for u
Jpclarke I'm not really sure what a chemical is sorry for my ignorance but hope your feeling ok.
I think your right about breast feeding and conceiving some ppl will get pregnant while BF but most won't sadly.
Ignore ppl and their comments you do what is right for you and your baby . I BF to 13 months I loved doing it but it was the right time for me to stop and lo was happy.

Thanks for the support and advice. I decided to do something proactive about everything. After I had ds I had really bad bleeding like gushes after about 2 weeks but that eventually that stopped and then I didn't get my period back until ds was 9 months. But since I have it back I literally am gushing again every month. So I am thinking that possible breastfeeding wasn't the reason I couldn't conceive but possibly I have something internally going on. So last week I had to take dd to the doctor so while I was there I spoke to him about all of this. He wants to take bloods and for me to go back to my gynae so I am having bloods taken tomorrow and I am going to the gynae next Tuesday so hopefully that brings some answers. Timing would be all wrong for me to conceive now so I might wait 6 months of I am now considering if we should be happy with the two we have. I really don't know I am so torn. But either way I feel better about getting some tests done, and ruling them out before i can say for sure that breastfeeding is my problem.

I have always co slept with ds but I have started putting him in the cot now at night, we so far just as long as he stays in it before waking the first time. But I know I have to try and wean him at night. It's madness that he is still waking during the night, and after this length of time of sleepless nights I need to do something. My DD is 2.7 months so only 13 months between them! Anyway that's my update.

Hi,

Hoping to join all of you this month. It's been really interesting to read everyone's stories and especially inspiring to hear how long some of you have managed to breast feed for. I'm really hoping to let DS decide himself when is the right time to stop but at the same time, because I'm over forty and I know that I don't want to miss the chance of giving him a little brother or sister, I know that I need to get started on trying to conceive again now my cycle has returned.

DS is just eight months old and I had a period at eight weeks, when he was having some feeding problems due to silent reflux, then nothing until he was 24 weeks, which was a 38 day cycle followed by a 33 day one. During the day he feeds after breakfast and lunch, then before dinner and before he goes to bed at ten. Overnight he feeds at 2, 6 and 8, then gets up at ten. He does eat a lot of solid food, I think, judging by what comes out, so I'm not sure how much he actually drinks. I'm guessing that I don't have much chance of conceiving currently with so many feeds but it's all good practice! I don't want to reduce his feeding as he is dairy free at the moment while we wait for allergy testing in July and at least I know breastfeeding is ok for him.

I'm going to try to temp and use OPKs this month as knowing if I don't ovulate will help me avoid getting my hopes up but it will be tricky due to the night wakings.

Good luck to everyone!

Hi jp that sounds really positive getting tests done. Good plan.

Welcome cineraria that does sound like quite a lot of feeding to be able to conceive but you never know. And it will gradually reduce as he eats a bit more or sleeps a little more.

Well I'm on holiday now and still no af. Don't have a test and I'm kinda in the middle of nowhere so I can't find one anywhere!!! Trying (and failing) not to obsess! No symptoms except lack of af (3days late now aprx) and some spotting at 7/8 dpo. Will be heading straight to boots as soon as I'm off the plane on say if af doesn't turn up!!

Fingers crossed for you lacey don't know how you can stand the suspense!

I had no luck on first sort of official month of trying but no idea if I'm actually ovulating yet so attempting opk/temping this month to see what happens. Luckily DH is back from business trip before my expected fertile window!

Sorry to hear that some people are having to wean completely to get pregnant but understand this might be the only way! I'm still clinging onto hope I can continue BF a bit longer although ideally I want to have #2 before we return to the UK and time is ticking

How exciting, Lacey. Wishing you lots of luck for Saturday.

Thanks lullaby and cineria I will definitely update you. I am now feeling quite hopeful as I'm on cd 31 when I'm normally 26,27 days and my boobs seem a bit sore. Also my resting heart rate has risen (according to my Fitbit) and apparently that's a sign... But I won't know until sat!! Can't wait to poas hehe. Good luck to you lullaby glad DH is back at the right time!!

Got pregnant 2-3 on a clear blue! Did it in the airport toilets! Good luck to everyone, just to say I am still breastfeeding evening and morning so it is possible!

Congratulations! Such good news. Hope you're feeling ok and that everything goes well for you.

Huge congrats Lacey, I am genuinely thrilled for you. And it gives the rest of us hope

Brilliant news Lacey & great hope for the rest of us too!

Hi everyone, a bit late to the party but hoping I can join you? Congratulations on your BFP Lacey and wishing you a healthy 9 months!

I have an 8-month-old DD who I'm breastfeeding 2-4 times a day at the moment. I've recently started introducing formula in a sippy cup because I'm hoping to drop down to just the morning and evening feeds by about 9 months, but she's never had milk from a bottle/cup before so it's been pretty slow-going! The last couple of days I've managed to get her to take an oz in the morning and afternoon, which is definite progress! She does get around 6-8oz of formula per day mixed into her solid meals.

I got my first PPAF last month, which makes this cd25 of our first cycle TTC. I'm not hugely hopeful for this cycle as my first AF was very light and short and came only 7-9 days after I think I ovulated (based on CM), so a pretty short LP. But I'm hoping for a reasonably regular cycle length at least, so that I know things are getting back on track and roughly when to expect O and AF in the future.

I had A LOT of patchy EWCM in the weeks leading up to my first PPAF, and this month I've had constant EWCM of varying amounts since about cd14, still ongoing! So not really sure what's going on but I'm hoping it will suddenly dry up so I can start counting

Looking forward to getting to know you all!

Hi jooni welcome aboard!

Good luck with getting your DD to take milk from a cup, my DS is very uninterested in cows milk at the moment! My first 3 AFs were abnormally light and short (for me) but after that they felt a bit more normal. Still not sure if I'm ovulating though, temping is not showing anything this month

I have decided to drop DS's post morning nap feed so he down to 3 feeds now. He seems to be ok with water and a snack and takes more at bedtime which I want him to so he sleeps through! Does anyone know is it frequency of feeding or quantity of milk produced that affects fertility??

Hi everyone hope it's ok to join?

I'm still feeding my 15mo morning and at night. And sometimes once during the day when she asks.. would love to start TTC, still no af but we have been dtd just to see what happens but nothing yet. Just bought clear blue ovulation 4 day tests. Not sure if it'll show I'm ovulating and will just have to do a test everyday so might be a big waste of money! But would hate to miss out on a fertile day just because we're too tired to dtd as we'd make time for it otherwise!

Just to sympathise with a pp, im also getting the pity comments about how I can't go out at night. Drives me mad. It's a joint decision to keep feeding (baby's mainly, but I love the closeness) and I'm slowly starting to introduce the idea of weaning to her but I love how easy it is to feed her to sleep! I think my next move is to drop morning feeds but do people usually drop night feeds first? Should I give her a cup of milk in the am instead of my milk?! No idea about things like that as we just go with the flow. Think I need to chat it through with HV but would love to hear your tips too

Anyway that's me, sorry it's so long and rambling! Had a full night's sleep for once which always makes me feel more tired I think!! (Definitely not complaining though! Just not used to it!)

Hi Esme, another newbie!

I'm afraid I can't really help you on the dropping feeds front as my DD is younger and still having both of those feeds, but my understanding is that most people find it easier to drop the morning feed first, especially if your DD is used to feeding to sleep. I'm trying to replace daytime feedings with the cup atm but it is slow-going. Perseverance is the name of the game!

lullaby It's thought to be the actual suckling itself that suppresses fertility by stimulating prolactin production, so the more you can cut down on time spent at the breast the better. Anything that increases the efficiency of your LO nursing will help (e.g. feed when drowsy, space out feeds more or feed on schedule, get rid of distractions, cut down on "comfort suckling", etc. etc.) It's total time rather than quantity of milk or frequency per se. Apparently a threshold of about 100 mins of nursing a day is low enough for most women to become fertile again, though obviously it varies hugely from person to person. Hope that helps.

Welcome Esme and Jooni,

I can't really advise much on weaning as my ds definitely dictates. The day time feeds he dropped naturally as more food was introduced, but when I went back to work I had to wean him off one of the day time feeds.

We are still feeding during the night 18 months later but I know some of them are purely just comfort feeds so my plan is to try and try to get some energy together and work on dropping them now as we have never had a full night sleep in 18 months. So if anyone has any suggestions on how to get a very attached ds into a cot and any hints on night weaning they will be very welcome??

I went to the gynae today and he scanned me and could see I was about to ovulate. He said 2/3 of pregnancies end in very early miscarriages. He took some bloods and wants me to have day 21 bloods for the next 2 months and go from there then.

So my second PPAF arrived today, exactly 28 days after the first. I'm a little bit disappointed to see her of course, but I'm glad I don't seem to have the super-long cycles that lots of people do while breastfeeding.

Not sure if or when I'm ovulating though, as my almost 2 weeks of varying amounts of EWCM only dried up a couple of days ago. Really hoping that means it continued for a while after ovulation, rather than that I have a 2-3 day LP! Has anyone ever experienced fertile-looking CM after they know they ovulated?

Hello! Thanks fot the warm welcome :)

A beginners FAQ... is LP lunal phase? What is that?! And took me a long time to remember that CM isn't Childminder haha! (How did I ever conceive my 1st baby?!)

Ovulation test today = empty circle. Think this will be an expensive exercise! Anyone tried testing ovulation before their first pp period? Have been sure AF is due for months now...

So sorry to read about your experience JP

Hi Esme, LP is the luteal phase (the post ovulation half of the cycle) which is often shorter than normal when breastfeeding. If it's very short, it may not allow enough time for the fertilised egg to implant before the next cycle starts.

I'm not really sure if I used OPKs before my first pp period. I had bleeding at 8 weeks pp which might have been a period (DS was having feeding problems due to silent reflux, and drinking very little, so that may have brought it on) but might have still been bleeding related to the birth. I bought 30 cheapie OPKs on eBay and used them all after that but had no luck and then didn't have another period until he was 24 weeks.

Glad to hear you have things underway with the gynaecologist jp. Hope the tests will lead to a good outcome for you.

Jooni, I didn't test in any official way for ovulation last month but I did have a day of stomach pains and diarrhoea, which is something that I usually notice on ovulation day or the day before and I had lots of ewcm after that. My son is the same age as your DD, but I think I'm feeding a lot more than you still.

I had a positive OPK today and the stomach and bowel symptoms too, so I'll be doing my best to check my temps for the next few mornings so I can see if I actually ovulate. Fingers crossed!

Ooh - good luck Cine! Fingers crossed for you!

jp sorry, I just read back a bit. Really sorry to hear about your loss. It hurts just as much no matter how early. Hoping you get the answers you need on Tuesday x

Hi all, can I join?

My DS is 2yr and 2m and still beast feeds twice a day. Sometimes though, due to my shifts he doesn't breast feed for 48 hours.

Me and DH decided to TTC earlier this year, fell pregnant on cycle 1 but miscarried three weeks after my BFP.

This month we decided to try again but BFN sadly and I felt very disheartened by it.

Part of me is questioning whether BF is playing a role. I know it's very early in the TTC business to be thinking that but I can't shake my uneasiness about it

Hi all, great to see so much activity I'm trying to keep up

Welcome Esmerelda & Writer. Esme you might want to get some internet cheapy OPKs from Amazon or wherever if you think you'll be testing a lot, the Clearblue ones are a pricey business!

Thanks Jooni for the interesting info on time spent feeding, we are definitely below 100 mins, I guess we dropped below that threshold when I started to schedule his feeds as AF returned 2 months later.

jp I had to get DS to get used to DH settling him at bedtime and for night wakes in order to wean him off night feeds.

Well still no positive OPK here but my temp did rise this morning dunno if that was a fluke and my body is trying but failing to ovulate, darn. DH has had a cold and has been grumpy so no DTD possibility anyway I have been in quarantine in the spare room! DS's sleep has gone to hell this past week, so my grand plans of dropping a feed/no night feeding has not really worked as I was worried it might be linked to him not settling. But I think he is transitioning down to 1 nap and also just started walking yesterday so lots going on in his little brain.

Re: dropping feeds I think DS will drop his morning feed last as he is always most interested and whines for milk at 7am, he is not that bothered about his bedtime feed (more interested in playing/chatting/kicking me in the face) & he doesn't feed to sleep any more so it's quite short.