Still struggling to conceive no. 2 after getting pregnant easily first time round

[LittlePoot]

So, on the back of a run of rather fantastic success stories, it's time to start another thread for those of us still driving ourselves a bit nuts trying to work out why number 2 seems to be so elusive. New frustrated, obsessive testers always welcome (as are our lovely graduates) and let's hope this thread turns out as many success stories as the last.

Note added: it took me a couple of hours to finish writing this around an over excited 4 year old so apologies if it's all already been said! Oh fruitbat - I hate that feeling. And I still manage to convince myself pretty regularly that this is the month and then the stick of doom ruins my plans. You'd think after 2 years I'd have got over it but sadly no. In fact, I'm doing it right now so in a couple more days I'll be right there with you (am about cd9 and full of "symptoms"). I would recommend seeing the Dr even though what they can do is fairly limited. They can check if you're ovulating and your dh's sperm. They can also refer you to a hospital consultant for scans to check your tubes are open and that everything looks broadly normal. Although ivf is out on the NHS, they could offer clomid if ov is a problem so worth at least ruling that out. I'm seeing a private consultant Tuesday so I can let you know if there are more options that way.

Sorry to hear of about bfn fruit I know exactly what you mean about that crushing feeling, I've been ttc since June last year and every month I convince myself that this is the month and cannot believe my negative tests and af arriving. But think positive, you're not out yet, you may get a bfp in a couple of days - fingers crossed. Gp is a good idea. I went to see mine on an unrelated matter and mentioned the lack of success and he said they could try medication for ovulation - presume that would be clomid?
little - at trying to write your post for a couple of hours - I know that feeling, I have an excitable 3yr old! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you too, I know what you mean, it's impossible not to get your hopes up each month, I hope this is the one for you.
I'm cd13 and a fixed smiley on the clearblue opk today. I am trying not to get too carried away as I have had previous months with lots of dtd around the fixed smiley day and it hasn't worked but it's hard not to think maybe just maybe this time. The craziness for me will kick in about 7dpo where I will want to poas but my plan this month is to only order my pregnancy tests so they will arrive at 10dpo so I can't be tempted. Last month I was totally crazy and convinced myself that all the evap lines on my internet cheapies were faint lines, I really am pathetic

Yup, bfn here too. Just spent a week meeting the cute tiny babies of all my friends too so convinced myself it was my month. Again. And its not. Again. And its raining. Pretty much sums it up!

Sorry to hear that Little. Hopefully tomorrow will bring something positive.

Good luck today little. Let us know how you get on xx

Thanks ladies. Got on ok today I think. Really nice woman - much nicer than the consultant I saw here. She went through our history, tests and lifestyle questionnaire. Turns out my progesterone result is actually what they would consider low (although within NHS guidelines) which suggests not very good ovulation (that month). She's recommended amh test and possible follicle scan then repeat little men count for dh to see if vitamins and less alcohol have improved their morphology. Then we'll speak again. She's recommending I see one of their senior Drs who specialises in immune therapy to improve ivf to talk through other tests and see whether we really do have crappy eggs and crappy sperm in which case icsi ivf would be the only worthwhile intervention option. In the meantime I have a relaxation and visualisation cd (weird, but oddly hypnotic!) and she was pleased I'd started the myo inositol as she thinks it's great. No other lifestyle suggestions although she recommended extra fruit and veg. Otherwise she said our diet and lifestyle (v long questionnaires!) weren't perfect but were good enough. So, £200 down including train fare but I do feel a bit better. Reading between the lines, they'd be confident of getting me pregnant through ivf but sadly we probably don't have the cash for that so I'll just have to take their recommendations on improving our natural fertility I think. I guess see what the amh test brings back - if I'm out of eggs then at least that would be an answer! Even if it is a crappy one.

That does sound worth the trip/money. How do you feel about it all?

I feel like it will be good to get some more answers but I can tell I'm going to be spending a lot of money to get them! It was good to have my questions taken so seriously - very different to the NHS appointment! I need some answers so if it costs a few more £ then so be it.

Wow Little. Amazing the difference between private and nhs and definitely sounds worthwhile. I'm guessing your referral to the senior consultant will also be really quick too? Also interesting about the inositol. Did they mention about clomid as an option if your ovulation isn't great?

Have you ever tried acupuncture? I saw a great woman for a few months but couldn't keep up the cost of it at £40 a session 2-3 times a month. I did love it though and could actually feel my ovaries pulsating during a treatment!

And don't feel too disheartened if they say ivf is the only option - that's what they said to me...!

Yes, very different. Follow up appointment start of September and that'll be 90 mins and include an ultrasound! If only I was rich - there's no end to the options they could suggest.

Interesting you mention acupuncture as that's the only other thing I've been considering. How did you find the person you saw and how did you know they'd be any good?! I googled it a while ago but had no idea how to judge their competence!

Pleased to hear you had a good consultation little and have got some more tests lined up. Being proactive always feels good, doesn't it?

I also had 6 months of acupuncture, though I stopped a month before I got my BFP and don't know whether it really did anything to help or not. The lady I saw seemed to think it did, but then she would say that!

The other thing I did was take CoQ10, I don't if you're on that? It's supposed to help with egg quality, and although there are no scientific studies to prove it works, from what I've read most IVF consultants seem to think it can't hurt.

I just google searched local acupuncturists and found a lovely lady who had trained with zita west. I'm pretty sure she helped kick start my ovulation and it definitely helped regulate my cycles. It was just very expensive as it was weekly treatments for the first month and then twice a month after that - one before ovulation and one after. I loved it but had to stop due to cost and also found it really messed with my head as I was convinced it was going to be a miracle cure and wasn't for me. Might be worth a go though. She also had me taking royal jelly shots every day (another supplement to add to the list!)

I just googled again using my postcode and weirdly, there's a little clinic offering acupuncture just 2 mins from my house! Not Zita West accredited but they offer a free initial 30 minute chat so I'll try that and see what I think. And I just did a PubMed search on CoQ10 (searching published research papers) and there are a couple of recent papers showing mildly successful results. So I'll be doing that too! I wish I'd give straight to this private clinic last year instead of my GP, but that's easy to say in hindsight isn't it?! Thanks ladies. x

Weirdly, I just rang the place and the owner (man) who normally gets booked up ages in advance has just had a cancellation tomorrow at the one time I can leave work. Fate?! Very handy anyway, so I now have a (free) 30 minute consultation with him tomorrow about acupuncture so can see if I think he's any use to me and if so, book some sessions for when I get back from holiday. You're right metal - being proactive definitely feels better. Even if it is costing me money.....

Well it does seem like it's been a productive 24 hours for you Little!

Private vs nhs is like night and day. Was getting pain in ovary and went for scan yesterday. good news all clear no cysts or endo. But still Ttc number 2. Trouble is oh doesn't have high sex drive so cutting down our already reduced chances given my age. Starting to consider private IUI.

Hello bored. Sorry you're having trouble but glad your scan was clear. I actually asked about iui at my appointment too. She said normal iui had the same success rate as actually having sex. And the rate is a bit higher if you have iui with simulation of ovulation. Didn't sound worth it for us, but if lack of sex is part of the issue then it might be worth thinking about?

Hi Ladies,

Well you've all given me something to think about, perhaps acupuncture is next for me?

Feel so down today. I ovulated last Monday and I have started to get my period cramps today, they are the same kind of cramps I get every month, so highly doubtful it's implantation cramping. I'm 9dpo so wondering if I have a short luteal phase? I am due on tomorrow according to my period tracker, but don't think that's likely to happen with only being 9dpo, plus I get these cramps around 3 to 4 days before I come on. Looks like i'm out again this month.

Next month will mark a year of trying. I feel so frustrated I could scream. I'm so emotional today! It was my next door neighbour's funeral today and it was so bloody sad, she will be very sadly missed. I was looking at her 3 (grown up) kids supporting each other and part of me was thinking "When I die my DD might not have that support"

We dtd exactly when we should have and plenty of time in the run up to ovulation this months, so I just don't fucking know what the problem is. Going to take a pregnancy test on Friday morning to be certain, and then booking in with my Dr again. Although to be honest they weren't particularly interested a couple of months ago, so nothing will have changed.

Oh Village, sorry to hear you're feeling so down. There is hope, even at a year of trying, as our recent successes have shown. But I totally get where you are, it's shit, and that's all there is to say about it.

My GP was dreadful, didn't know which blood tests to send me for etc., which wasted time for us. Perhaps it's better to go in knowing what the outcome you want is and don't leave until you get!

Morning Ladies, I know I'm a bit late to this party but I've brought non-alcoholic biodynamic wine for those of us abstaining from booze while TTC. I'm

Having conceived first time on DD I'm on my fifth month TTC for baby number too but only using clearblue kits the last three months. This month I seem to have unending High Fertility smiley faces but no sign of peak for over a week now. I know it's still early days compared to some of the other ladies on here but it's getting to me a bit. Particularly as DTD has become a bit overly planned and mechanical, not that it was great before TTC as having a 3 1/2 year old and both of us working full time will put a dampner on things.

Going by some of the comments I've seen online I can see that using clearblue ovulation kits can take a few months to get used to your cycle highs and lows. I'm just feeling a bit disheartened as I really want to have baby number two sooner rather than later but not sure how long my enthusiasm for it can last given that I'm 37 this year and not sure how my fertility will last.

Has anyone else had negative feelings towards TTC? I'm new to this kind of forum so be gentle with me.

Hi guys. I briefly hung around the previous thread for a bit. Think I was autonomousplum at that stage serial namechanger but I thought I'd let you know that I feckingfinally managed to get my BFP this month. :)
You may recall that ever since DC my LP was 6 or 7 days and no matter what I tried nothing fixed it. Months of crappy LPs that could never realistically hold a pregnancy even if I got eggs fertilised every damn month. So disheartening. Ended up with referral to a fertility clinic which sorted me first month.
My post-OV progesterone levels were shite so I immediately got utrogestan pessaries for that, but the doctor was also quite gung-ho and scanned my tubes (apparently quite often they can get damaged during pregnancy/birth without anyone realising, causing problems conceiving thereafter. Mine were okay luckily), also checked my prolactin levels (BFing woman apparently sometimes "get stuck" with high prolactin levels even if they stopped Bfing which can impact on fertility. Luckily, again, my prolactin was okay and it was mainly the progesterone), gave me letrozole (similar to clomid. some people are clomid resistant and this works better) to ensure ovulation, an hcg shot to trigger ovulation, and then the progesterone to extend my LP.
BFP same month! Still early days only 5 weeks but am so pleased. I am now a massive massive massive massive have I said massive yet? fan of progesterone pessaries. And enthusiastic doctors.
Wanted to let you all know what happened because there is a very particular kind of stress for us to magically conceiving a baby without even really trying first time around and then struggling unsuccessfully for months and maybe even years to repeat the endeavour. GPs tend to say "oh well it happened easily first time so surely it is just a matter of time" but I would definitely recommend harassing them for blood tests and referrals, or even consider paying for a private GP or basic fertility assessment.
xf for you all.
:)

Congratulations auf (never could spell in German....)! Amazing story - and amazing what medicine can do if you can find out what the problem is. I'm hoping something similarly treatable might come from me having more tests done, or at least something closer to a definite 'no'. Fingers crossed the rest of your pregnancy is quiet and uneventful.

Hello and wellcome bluejean -5 months isn't really very long when you look at it from my perspective (24 months in and still counting) but it's still a horribly frustrating time for you so please do join us and share the load. Age wise, we've seen lots of recent success for women significantly older too so hopefully these stories will give you some hope. I don't think I can help with the clearblue tests though, although someone else was having the same problem a week or so back (village maybe?) so it sounds pretty common. As are negative feelings about ttc - it's a glorious pain in the ass! Every bloody month the same - up and down, up and down. And I'm not even talking about the sex part (although that could be described in much the same way!). As I said though, lots of positive stories to look back on if you need a bit of reassurance that you will hopefully get there in the end.

How are you doing village? Hope you're a bit brighter today? Definitely pee on a stick in the morning so you can get an answer one way or another (and hopefully a surprisingly positive one) and if it's not so positive then do see the GP and ask for the tests to be done (yours and dh's). Worth a try in case there is something obvious.

I've just been to the acupuncturist and will give it a go and see what happens. This was just a 'chat' (all a bit wooo, but worth a try) so no needles yet, but apparently I have obvious things to treat according to my pulses blah blah blah. Everyone I've ever heard of having acupuncture has found it at the very least lovely and relaxing, so that's a good outcome in itself.

Wonderful news Auf and certainly given me something to think about re - pessaries

Welcome Bluejean Yes I remember starting to get antsy around 5 months, and I know what you mean about them smug high fertility faces! First time i'd tried those tests last month, had 3 days no fertility, then 7 days high fertility, then bloody run out of tests Anyway, I got cheap ovulation tests the day after I ran out of clearblue & it was a positive.

Ladies, can you talk to me about luteal phases? I only found out what they were a few days ago My period tracker shows my average cycle being 32 (it can be less or more, up to 35 days, some months) So it's telling me i'm due on today (based on 32 days) but I only ovulated last Monday (10 days ago) Does that mean my cycle may be around 35 days this month and I won't be due on til about Sunday? How long does a luteal phase need to be (minimum) in order to get pregnant?

I'd ignore the period tracker! My LP is always 13/14 days - so I always come on about 13 or 14 days after I ovulate. I sometimes ovulate late, but period always comes 13/14 days later (14/15 days after a positive opk). But that's about all I know....

I wouldn't say I'm the world expert in luteal phases, but close...

So, the theory is that your luteal phase (I.e. The bit after ovulation) remains constant, and if your cycle is short/Long/varies in a given month it's because there was a difference in the follicular phase. So rather than looking at overall length of cycle and getting your hopes up when you're late, you ought to track ovulation and work out when you're due by adding your luteal phase.

The ideal lp is 12-14 days, anything shorter than about 10 is more of an issue as it means the womb lining hasn't had enough time to thicken to be a good host for a fertilised egg. There's lots of stuff online about how to lengthen your lp, which is why I was taking maca. One of the reasons can be low progesterone, hence the pessaries Aufwiedersehen mentioned.