Candle smugglers of the world unite! The Berries have loaded up the charabanc and have Barry on repeat. Destination BFP (via the pouch of Douglas)

[happylass]

The small print:

The Berries have strict entrance criteria: TTC #1 for 12 months+, over 30, NO instadiffers, must have a special pimping pot and absolutely no mention of baby dust/dancing. Not that we're fussy

Current passengers

Happylass, 37, TTC since Aug 2012. 2 failed ICSIs. Hopefully FET early May with only frostie. Long awaited NHS appt in June
Beaky 35, ttc coming up 3 yrs, 2x failed iui 1x long protocol ivf cancelled due to poor response. On the pill awaiting short protocol IVF in may
Minx, 34, both tubes blocked, 1 buried ovary, IVF info evening June, IVF "booking in" appointment in July
Nolly, 33, TTC 2.7 years, mc Dec 2014. awaiting ivf August 2015 while dh is off on a jolly.
Wild 40 - TTC for three years. Embies on ice and planning FET with immune treatment in June.
HampshireBlues 36 TTC 3.5 years, unexplained. Cycle 1 chemical pregnancy, cycle 2 abandoned due to cyst, cycle 3 failed. Plan thrombotic profile, scratch and short protocol.
Lumen, 35, ttc since Nov 2011, unexplained, two IVF cycles in 2014, both bfns, waiting for lap&dye and results of numerous bloods, aiming for one last IVF cycle in the summer.
Tigerdog, 34 ttc since Jan 2013. Unexplained and all test results good. Currently in the middle of long protocol IVF, 13 eggs collected and awaiting news for next steps.
Gillster, 41, TTC since Feb 2012. Had IVF in Feb 14 and had 6 one cell embies frozen due to polyp. 2 x 2 day embies finally put back 14 months later on 16th April, BFP 28th April
Smidge, 39 this month, TTC since Jan 2013. Unexplained. IVF#1 Short protocol July '14 BFN, IVF#2 Nov'14 and IVF#3 Feb '15 both Long protocol BFNs. High NK cells immune treatment. 2 frosties due to be put back in natural FET in May or June.
Kuma - 40. TTC 2.5 years. Low AMH high FSH - DH antisperm ABs. Failed IVF June 14 and March 15. Looking to change clinic and try another natural cycle in June 2015.
Lucieloos, 35, TTC 18 months, low AMH & sperm motility. 1st ICSI in Czech Republic in April 2015. Awaiting results.
Barkingtreefrog, 35, ttc since Dec 2011. Clomid bfp summer 2013, mc @ 7 weeks. IUI bfp summer 2014, mc @ 7 weeks. Diagnosed with factor v leiden thrombophilia (but
not thought to be the cause of the mc's as they were too early). Failed IUI January 2015, failed IVF March 2015. No further NHS help. Going private for nk cells testing and a scratch before putting the frosties back, hopefully this summer.
Rain, 33 ttc since March 2012. unexplained. mystery bfp oct 13, MMC Nov 13. NHS IVF starting in June
Spare planning FET with remaining frosties shortly
Pont 1st IVF in Czech Republic in July.

Sounds like we're gearing up for a bit of action for a few people. FETs for smidge and wild and cycles for lucie and kuma. Time to get off my ass and practice my moves!! Lots to cheer on.

I, on the other hand, am in limbo whilst the next plan comes together. af is here and she is meeeeean. Back is killing and feeling majorly grouchy.

smidge it's people minimising this experience that gets my goat the most! Even if they're clumsily trying to say it will all be ok.

I have to clarify that I do miss Mr T lots but we send lots of silly emails/texts and talk on the phone 2-3 times a day. T-dog is pretty special but she's not mastered the internet yet, and I can't stroke her soft ears unless she has her pointy head in my lap!

Love the dessert mine sweep barking! Hope you're doing ok.

I hear you on the jealousy beaky. There's s very pregnant lady on my floor at work. She looks great and I'm always a when I walk past. When's your follow up? Mine has been cancelled and rearranged for my birthday. happy birthday to me, yay.

There are no pg women at work anymore, they're both off on maternity, but there is someone who walks past the office on her way to work and I seem to always notice her every bloody morning. I'm on the 5th floor but I sit by the floor to ceiling windows. There must be hundreds of people who walk along the road below while I'm staring at my screen, but I always glance down in time to spot the happy pg lady .

Life here continues to be shit. Dad now has C Difficile. Couldn't visit at the weekend because of the wedding, and we're away this coming weekend as well. It's a 4 hour round trip to do in the evening and I've been feeling ill since yesterday so don't feel up to it. Might have to take a day of holiday to go over.

Need lots of action on here to distract me!! Who's up first?!

Ooh Smidge the pace is picking up over there and here. My lot get defrosted tomorrow - nervous but a optimistic.

Barking - I'm kicking off the action purely for your entertainment as ordered.

And Lucie good to hear that you are very nearly back on the starting line.

It looks like AF will start tomorrow for me too so will call the clinic in the morning. hopefully the cyst dance will have worked. not sure if I've got the strength to go on with this if I've got cysts again.... must think positive.

Good luck Lucie!

Hugs barking.

on phone and have already forgotten everything I've read.....

goodnight!

DH just came in saying he'd spent 20 mins chatting to the couple who have just moved in opposite and that they seem lovely then he just casually mentions that the woman is 8 months pregnant. No. Just no.

I don't even have a scan to check for cysts. Hope that's not going to cause any problems! They just start me on the meds and that's it. My first scan will be day 7 or 8.

Happy, sorry to hear about your new neighbour. Our next door neighbour has just given birth and the last childless woman in our office apart from me has announced she is expecting. She's 7 years younger than me

Woohoo Wild any updates yet? too early I know how are you feeling?

Kuma good luck, I'm joining in Smidges eyes/fingers dance creepy and really hope all is clear for you.

lucie good luck! All fingers crossed for you. Can I ask why don't you have a baseline scan?

Tiger boo to the cancelling and rearranging of your follow up on your birthday. How rubbish. Will you be getting your bloods redone this week then? I was thinking of asking the doctor about having mine redone as it's been a while and I don't have up to date info to put on my serum questionnaire. Anyway, how long til your break away?

Barking so sorry to hear your dad now has c-diff, I hope he recovers quickly from that. What a tough time you are having.

Happy massive massive no to your new neighbour. Arghh. Did you manage to get your smear done for starting your cycle in August?

I had a huge melt down last night and found dh's "helpful" comments, less than helpful. While I do know that whatever happens I will be ok eventually there is too much uncertainty and too much still to get through to get to a place where I can accept what is happening. It worries me that I don't want to start thinking in terms of this may not happen, as I still need to think it will to keep myself positive and so I can function normally but where do you draw the line. I am so confused and it just feel a bit like dh doesn't fully understand. Anyway sorry for that whinge.

Oh no poor Beaky. Sorry to hear that you have been having a tricky time with DH. I believe there is a process involved in coming to terms with your (one's) fertility situation and it can't be rushed. You have to do each step. I think the therapeutic effect of IVF in coming to terms with the possible eventuality of no baby is not sufficiently recognised.

Your situation is tough but people do get pg with your AMH levels so there is a point to you going through the whole procedure. Your DH needs to recognise that if, if, if it turns out you never get to have your own genetic child then the money and effort you put into treatment now will pay off handsomely in allowing you to live peacefully with that reality. You have every right to walk the steps you need to walk to eventually be ok. Knowing that you will eventually be ok, no matter what the outcome, is a very good sign and shows your strength Beaky. And for those people who are uncomfortable because they want you to be ok now, well just F* 'em.

I do indeed have news from the FC. They just called to say that all ten embies survived and we should expect transfer on Thursday or maybe Friday if they need some extra time for the front runners to identify themselves. Woohoo! I'm feeling pretty excited. My pants are also very damp which I can only think is a sign that all is well in wombland.

Tiger how annoying that your follow up is on your birthday. Fingers crossed it is a helpful appointment and you can immediately head out to celebrate get pissed on one glass of wine.

Kuma I'm not too sure what this anti-cyst dance is but I will do my best with some freestyle moves. Good luck.

Happy if I had my way then all preggos would have to live in a residential camp on an out-of-town industrial park next to Ikea for the duration of their term. Commiserations on your neighbour.

Wild your wet pants = all well in wombland comment just made me do a very loud snort-giggle this happens rarely and in itself caused a second explosion!

In the meantime I've been checking my pants but no similar sign yet. I had another dark line on the OPKs today so I'm even more sure I hadn't ovulated yesterday, but am hoping the resultant earlyish ET might in fact be the answer (what with 3 day transfers working for other people an all).

The pessary fun starts tomorrow night.

Beaky I'm sorry emotions are running high. I think Wild could be renamed Wise, her comments certainly rang true for me.

Wild thanks for kicking off the action there, much appreciated And 10!!! Whoop!!!

happy No!!!! Not allowed. We had a couple move in next door when 8 months pg, they now push a pram round the back of the house . DH is quite friendly with them. I don't think I've ever spoken a word to either of them, they must think I'm a right miserable bitch.

kuma still dancing the cyst free dance over here!!

beaky I swing from one to the other. At the moment I've decided that I will have a baby, perhaps even one of these surprise natural diffs after 6 years of trying... and in the meantime I just need to refocus and enjoy life in the meantime. Last year I was totally on the 'this is never going to happen' train. Whichever train I'm on, DH pointing out that the important thing is we have each other doesn't help, even if it is true.

Smidge enjoy the bum bullets

I can't remember who asked but the nk cells results take 3-4 weeks then the results are posted to us, so I'm not expecting them until the end of the month.

Woohoo to your little fighter embies Wild that is amazing news! Fx for Thursday/Friday for you! Totally also laughed out loud at your damp pants!

And thank you Wild that is such good advice and yes you should be renamed Wise! I think I need to find a way to explain it better to dh but I don't know how. He does know it's a big thing but I think he is struggling for himself as well as trying to help me.

Smidge thanks, I hope it's not for any of us good luck smuggling candles!

Barking yes, the we have each other thing is lovely and important but you're right it doesn't help at the moment. I love your positivity though and will try and join you on the hammock of hope!

Wild, brilliant news on the embryos. 10 is amazing!

Beaky, sorry to hear about DH. I think wild has given some really good advice too. I think we all need to go through ivf as many times as it takes so that we feel satisfied that we have tried all we can but hopefully one of those attempts will end up being successful. I don't know why no baseline scan for me? My clinic just doesn't request it. I worried about it for a bit a while back but asked around on some forums and it's seems that some do and some don't. I didn't think maybe I should just book myself in for one anyway but I didn't and it's too late now so will just have to hope all is ok. Injections start tomorrow and I'm going to be doing a mix of 150iu of Menopur and 100iu of Gonal-f this time. Apparently the Gonal helps quality and the Menopur helps growth.

Evening all, just popping in to say hello heifer popping off on the holibobs and unlikely to have a signal or Internet. So much about to happen on here so am busy Pom poking away for you all.

Lucie, yay to AF pitching up, good luck

Tiger boo to AF being mean, and a hottie for you (why is there no hottie smiley?)

Barking, sorry that you are having such a rough time and that your Dad now has C.Diff. It is miserable so I hope he has a swift recovery.

Beaky sorry that you are having some bad days. DH and I had lots of conversations about when to call it quits but we never came to an agreement as we decided that we would just know when to stop. I know that we didn't get there, but there were times during this cycle when I could have called it quits. Hugs and a berry shoulder.

Kuma good luck with the scan tomorrow I am doing the anti-cyst chacha.

Wild, 10 embies, that is amazing! Good luck with transfer

Smidge, enjoy the candle smuggling and good luck.

Rig off for shut eye as need to be up at half four!

that your dad has C.Diff barking - the hospital should be asking themselves some tough questions as to how that has happened. Hope you're feeling better

Aww, beaky I'm sorry that you're having a tough time. There is hope, and I think staying positive is a good thing, whilst you work out your next steps and beyond. Hope you're feeling better. A failed IVF takes a while to get over. 4 weeks on and I'm still up and down.

Happy holidays hb!

Go wild's embies!

Get candle smuggling smidge!

kuma good luck with the scan.

lucie no baseline scanning at my clinic either.

nolly how's you?

Berries, I'm sorry for the tmi but I have to share this with someone. I was in town, and just suddenly felt an almighty gush. Had to leg it to the nearest loos. Flooded through a tampon, a pad and right through my trousers! luckily in black so not visible really but still a fucking nightmare. How is this normal?! I really feel like my heavy clotty periods are not right, and no medical reason can be found. I'm still toying with asprin in case it is blood related.

Ahh Tiger that's awful when that happens. Maybe try the aspirin for next cycle and see if it helps. I'm not surprised you are still up and down, you have been through a lot.

HB enjoy the hollibobs! Thanks for the berry shoulder I think 3 cycles is what I have in my head but that could easily change.

lucie I wouldn't worry about the baseline scan thing. Good luck for starting stimming! Hopefully that combination will work better than last time. What were you stimming with then?

Ohh tiger I don't have the answer to that although since my first ivf my last couple of afs have been much heavier than usual. It's a good thing for me as they are normally fairly light so I feel they are a bit healthier now but yours sounds very heavy!

Beaky I was on 225iu of Menopur only last time but have since read it's not great for women with low AMH or pcos.

That sounds grim Tiger . Didn't you see an acupuncturist who gave you some, ahem, cleansing herbs? What did he/she say about your clotty periods? If you gave up acupuncture maybe it is worth trying it again. I felt a definite improvement in period pain from acu - although mine was never too bad. What have your doctors said about it? It's worth looking into it a bit more if you think it could be a sign of hidden trouble. Follow your instincts.

Also, good point from Lucie about AF possibly being heavier after IVF.

Beaky I think you are spot on in saying that your DH is struggling himself while also trying to help you. He likely just wants you to be happy. You will find a way to tell him that you have to find your own way through this, with his support of course.

I really laughed at Barking's observation that the partners saying the most important thing is to 'still have each other' is a true but useless comment. They really cannot win in this game.

Have you managed to see your dad yet Barking? How is he?

Come on with the pessaries Smidge . I need my 2ww buddy. I'm going to list all the progesterone support I am on as I know you have questioned AliG about this before: Utrogestan 200mg x3 per day, Crinone gel x2 per day, Lentogest injections every other day + oestrogen tablets and patches. The Lentogest really hurt afterwards, my leg feels really stiff and sore after just two injections.

Enjoy your holiday HB. What perfect timing to get away, so you can enjoy your break and your good news.

OMG Wild, that is a ridiculous amount of progesterone support!!! I think you must have broken all records on this one

wild That's a hell of a lot of progesterone! How are you feeling? Regular acupuncture did nothing for me in that respect. This month isn't so bad (believe it or not) as I haven't had the usual one or two sleepless nights in pain that I usually have. It was the abdominal massage lady who gave me the v-steam herbs! Might have to give them a go next week. Doctors have checked for causes, I had a laparoscopy and hysteroscopy (sp?) to check for endo as well as dildocams in the past - nothing found. It can be a symptom of an immune disorder

You might be right lucie although this can happen at any time. Post the chemical my period was lighter than normal, so perhaps this is my body getting rid of everything. Tmi but there are huge clots that I find quite horrifying.

Day 3 bloods today. There was a time when I hated having blood taken but these days it's the least of my worries!

Thanks for the dancing berries! scan isn't till Friday so you've got a few more days to go!

tiger sorry to hear AF is being a pain. wouldn't aspirin make it heavier though as it is a blood thinner. is clotting something to worry about, particularly? I had a while like that but didn't worry about it too much.

beaky sorry you're feeling down, I tend to find that dh and I have our ups and downs at different times, but even though it might be nice to be miserable together, it is probably better to have one prop up there other.

wild sounds like it's full steam ahead for you! and what a lot of progesterone! will they be testing progesterone post ET to see how you're doing?

Lucie I wouldn't worry about not having a scan, for me is useful because I had to cancel two cycles in the past for cysts. I don't think it's that common!

I'm not really looking forward to the weekend, we're seeing DHs family for father's day and got home last night to have DH announce that his brother and SIL are expecting no 2 (2nd since we started TTC too), due at Christmas so no doubt it will all be baby talk. on Sunday we're going to a christening, which I didn't really want to go to, DHs mate, not mine; lots of his friends and their babies will be there. he's now decided he doesn't really want to go either, but I think it's a bit too late now to pull out.

Oh Kuma that's an awful weekend. Just pull out, say he is ill with a vomiting bug or suspected chicken pox and that way you don't have to go either. Really really don't put yourself through that. Sorry about your in laws too, what a shite weekend overall for you. Fx you won't be far behind them though.

Wild wow!! Again at your drugs! You are managing this all so so well though. Do you get an embie update today?

Tiger my current AF has been very clotty (one was literally about 2inches long) and heavy and very painful. From what I've read IVF can do that but hopefully it will settle down for you by next cycle. When are you planning on going for the biopsy?

Smidge is this FET quite natural for you then? Hopefully that will be the key.

Barking how are you feeling? Any news on your dad?

Nolly how are you? Are you back to work?

Tiger my AF is clotty too - it's been this way for the past couple of years (never used to be). Maybe it coincides with all the drugs (Clomid prior to IVF) but I think I rather just put it down to age. Looks a bit gross but I never really thought it might be a problem/symptom. But I would imagine aspirin would help - if it thins the blood then surely there's be fewer clots.

beaky, yes - natural in the run up anyway. I start the progesterone tonight, and after ET will take Clexane again, just in case it helps with implantation, but a lot more hormone free than IVF. Fingers crossed this is the answer!

So the latest update from the FC is that all the embies are doing well - but four have surged ahead to morula stage so ET should be tomorrow. They will call in the morning to confirm.

Could somebody wang me please, because I am now thinking that the six which are slower are the six from my first EC cycle when I was accidentally not given the steroids which I should have had. I know that is a stupid way to think and I can only blame the fact that I've been waiting most of the day for the call and it has addled my critical faculties. Also I'm feeling quite tired from all the drugs.

I'm off to the local spa while I've got the chance.

Kuma that is the weekend from Hell. Why don't you take to your bed to avoid it. And yes, they will test my progesterone levels seven days after ET I believe.

There's absolutely no correlation. Fact.
looks round the room to see if she sounds convincing
And the others could still catch up anyway.

Good luck for ET!

About to eat dinner so no time to hang around but just wanted to blow germs in the direction of kuma with the best possible intentions. Don't do it to yourself. Personally I'd start feigning illness today, but battle through until the weekend and then have to take to my bed as I feel just dreadful and can't possibly leave the house.....

Wild no, that won't be it. remember, it only takes one, and you sound like you have some great strong embies there, I'm feeling very positive on your behalf Get your hypno/meditation tracks on too. I'll have a glass of wine for you in the meantime!

Right off out to walk the dog. Poor thing has been on her own for ages today