Candle smugglers of the world unite! The Berries have loaded up the charabanc and have Barry on repeat. Destination BFP (via the pouch of Douglas)

[happylass]

The small print:

The Berries have strict entrance criteria: TTC #1 for 12 months+, over 30, NO instadiffers, must have a special pimping pot and absolutely no mention of baby dust/dancing. Not that we're fussy

Current passengers

Happylass, 37, TTC since Aug 2012. 2 failed ICSIs. Hopefully FET early May with only frostie. Long awaited NHS appt in June
Beaky 35, ttc coming up 3 yrs, 2x failed iui 1x long protocol ivf cancelled due to poor response. On the pill awaiting short protocol IVF in may
Minx, 34, both tubes blocked, 1 buried ovary, IVF info evening June, IVF "booking in" appointment in July
Nolly, 33, TTC 2.7 years, mc Dec 2014. awaiting ivf August 2015 while dh is off on a jolly.
Wild 40 - TTC for three years. Embies on ice and planning FET with immune treatment in June.
HampshireBlues 36 TTC 3.5 years, unexplained. Cycle 1 chemical pregnancy, cycle 2 abandoned due to cyst, cycle 3 failed. Plan thrombotic profile, scratch and short protocol.
Lumen, 35, ttc since Nov 2011, unexplained, two IVF cycles in 2014, both bfns, waiting for lap&dye and results of numerous bloods, aiming for one last IVF cycle in the summer.
Tigerdog, 34 ttc since Jan 2013. Unexplained and all test results good. Currently in the middle of long protocol IVF, 13 eggs collected and awaiting news for next steps.
Gillster, 41, TTC since Feb 2012. Had IVF in Feb 14 and had 6 one cell embies frozen due to polyp. 2 x 2 day embies finally put back 14 months later on 16th April, BFP 28th April
Smidge, 39 this month, TTC since Jan 2013. Unexplained. IVF#1 Short protocol July '14 BFN, IVF#2 Nov'14 and IVF#3 Feb '15 both Long protocol BFNs. High NK cells immune treatment. 2 frosties due to be put back in natural FET in May or June.
Kuma - 40. TTC 2.5 years. Low AMH high FSH - DH antisperm ABs. Failed IVF June 14 and March 15. Looking to change clinic and try another natural cycle in June 2015.
Lucieloos, 35, TTC 18 months, low AMH & sperm motility. 1st ICSI in Czech Republic in April 2015. Awaiting results.
Barkingtreefrog, 35, ttc since Dec 2011. Clomid bfp summer 2013, mc @ 7 weeks. IUI bfp summer 2014, mc @ 7 weeks. Diagnosed with factor v leiden thrombophilia (but
not thought to be the cause of the mc's as they were too early). Failed IUI January 2015, failed IVF March 2015. No further NHS help. Going private for nk cells testing and a scratch before putting the frosties back, hopefully this summer.
Rain, 33 ttc since March 2012. unexplained. mystery bfp oct 13, MMC Nov 13. NHS IVF starting in June
Spare planning FET with remaining frosties shortly
Pont 1st IVF in Czech Republic in July.

Ooh and the holiday is going to be partly in England - just booked 5 nights here...

www.mulberrycottages.com/cottage/holiday-cottages-in-kent/203188-faversham-house/

Which will be with family, and then 3 nights for us in Bordeaux (St Emilion I think) as I want to show MrSmidge the delights of the French countryside/vineyards/ walled towns/chateaux etc! Can't wait!

Hello everyone, hope you're all having a fairly easy day today?

Next Tuesday is the day we go to the hospital and get the results of the prods and pokes I've had for the last four months and if my womb really is made out of jelly I'm trying not to think about but when it suddenly pops up in my head I get all anxious. How do you all cope with waiting for results and keeping yourself from going bonkers??

Also I was almost convinced that I might be pregnant after the HSG. I had the most tender and sore boobs, ovary ache, feeling hot and cold, sense of smell sharp as feck and then... AF arrived bang on time. I immediately went out and bought a chocolate orange and ate the whole thing as soon as I got in with a hot cup of sweet tea.

Mmm! Chocolate oranges are yum! Hope it made you feel a bit better. Symptom spotting is a mindfuck

minx the intralipids are supposed to help soak up overactive immune cells which might be attacking the embryo.

I think the endo in tubes effectively clogs them up so the egg can't get through. Maybe it's like having a great chunk of peanut butter in the way so the grain of sand gets stuck?

Smidge you're absolutely bang on symptom spotting being a mind fuck. Especially when it seems that almost every bloody symptom could mean you're pregnant. ARGH! The chocolate was comforting. I should buy shares with Terry's...

wild All went well, oven got delivered to work around 7.30 . I made a cake in it last night. Just to check it worked... Wheat free thing going well...

smidge Wow, she'd have me fuming!!! What relevance does anyone else's job have to do with you getting an appointment?! Why even mention she's a barrister?! I'm now raging on your behalf!!

Antonia after the ridiculously painful biopsy on Monday (seriously, I was paying privately, where was the sodding gas and air?!?!) I required an entire box of chocolates to recover .

I am the world's worst Berry - Ostrichitis got me good and proper over the last couple of weeks (plus work is ruining my life at the moment).
I can't believe I missed beakys PUPO - can I offer some belated pom-poming AND a bit of belly dancing by way of apology?

spare I'm also so sad for your bfn. Fucking sucks and I am so sorry. Your fresh plan is sounding good - this Serum clinic sounds pretty jazzy but exploring egg sharing seems like a good idea if you've previously had a good response.

smidge what a dick that secretary is, unbelievable! Your holiday sounds great, that house is amaaazing

antonia good to meet you - can't believe you've been at this for nearly 7 years, kudos to you for still being sane and I hope you get good results next week (hard one to quantify that - is 'good' finding a problem that you can fix or is 'good' finding no problems and going through the unexplained headfuck - still haven't decided myself on that one!!)

minx exciting! What happens at the info evening? is it just for Q&As? We went to an open evening at our clinic last year, it was really reassuring to meet so many staff (MrP especially loved looking at the 'live' sperm sample)

Wild I hope the drug taking is going alright and have a solidarity fistbump on the work front. Literally feel like I don't have a moment to myself at the moment and i can't see it improving for the foreseeable.

lucie I know it's the plan you're after but if you wanted the fertility meditation track I got from Rainbows lady I can send it to you? It's quite restful (I was using it when I was doing acupuncture, obviously neither actually did anything but definitely helped me relaaaax). PS looks like you, me, HB and barking are all June birthdays!

I'll catch up on the rest and be a better Berry. I think having nothing going on at all hasn't helped, but tomorrow is IVF appointment day, so no doubt I'll be renewing my MN obsession full time after that. Fucking terrified if I'm honest....

Another contender for the worlds word Berry here .... I've also been doing an ostrich impression having convinced myself that I must be on the verge of menopause and not worthy of another round of IVF. Finally I think I've ovulated at CD17, which is still really late for me, but gives me more confidence that I might be able to go ahead with the natural cycle this month. I had my appointment with the nurse last week which was pretty straight forward, but she told me for natural cycle they don't usually sedate for egg collection as there is usually only 1 egg. You can pay another £400 for sedation if you wish. Would I be crazy to try EC without sedation - is it likely to be worse than burning off polyps without any pain relief? That was pretty damn agonising and I survived.

They are also pushing me to do a lightly stimulated cycle - basically following the Create protocol. - I think one of the consultants used to work there. They suggest you stimm with 125 of Gonal F from day 5 to egg collection, and cetrotide to prevent OV. I've tried doing research to see if there is any benefit at all in doing this for low responders and can't find anything. I only got 2 eggs on 325 gonal F from day 2 to EC, so can't really see the benefit. I ovulated naturally and at about day 14 with no stimms at all on my last cycle. The cynic in me thinks they just want me to pay for more meds. Anybody any thoughts?

Rain good luck with your appointment tomorrow.

Barking kudos to you for getting through the biopsy - I hope it gives you some answers. How is your dad getting on now?

Smidge that seems really annoying of your clinic, and although not trying to condone the behaviour of the secretary, I wonder if the Barrister constantly calls them telling them she is a Barrister and oh so important every time she calls in order to get her own way?! Glad you have your appointment sorted though.

Wild great news that you are getting underway for your FET! I feel your pain on the work front - I hope it improves before ET.

Spare - I'm a bit late on this one, but so sorry this cycle didn't work out. I think Yorkie did an egg sharing cycle at The Lister, their clinic is really nice and I'd definitely be considering going there again if I could get a free cycle - sadly much too old though.

Lucie your cycle sounds really short - I have often had really short cycles, but I was ovulating early and then usually with 14 day LP. I was also told that the follicles often recruit early with short cycles, but rather than try and identify the early follicle they just put me on the pill so everything was the same size at the baseline scan. I've taken Agnus Castus, prescribed by my acupuncturist too, but it didn't seem to make any difference for me either. Until my last IVF my cycles were between 23 and 26 days. S

Beaky I hope you are feeling a bit better and not too stressed by the 2ww. Sending calming vibes our way

I'm sure there is plenty that I've missed as the thread seems to be really busy - but hello to you if I haven't replied personally.

Wow Smidge that looks amazing! Lots of wine, cheese and port would be appropriate there And I agree re the stupid gobby secretary! It doesn't matter what others do everyone should be treated equally. Glad you got your appointment sorted though.

Minx aka peanut butter tubes I'm excited for you to go to the open evening! They showed us a video of the sperm fertilising the egg then the progression etc which is quite cool. We have had a few new nurses join since they've got the new equipment etc but they are all lovely. There's only one I'm not too keen on but she's been ok recently. I'm not sure about testing still, also I don't have any symptoms, there's nothing going on down there today at all boo. I did have a bit of twingey crampiness the last couple of days but I would normally get that kind of thing from what I remember.

Thanks Rain! impressive! Good luck for your IVF appointment tomorrow! Will you be getting booked in for your cycle do you think? Boo to work being so manic too, I think sometimes it helps pass the time faster at least.

Antonia no advice really, sorry, just maybe try and distract yourself and make some other plans to take your mind off it. I will keep my fingers crossed that you are diffed very soon.

Oo barking what kind of cake? Jel. The biopsy sounds so painful.

Waves to everyone else, only two working days left this week yey!

Hi Kuma, glad there is someone else with short cycles! They did say I could try bcp but that with suppression I might not respond so well and numbers / quality would decrease so we think the best way forward is to give it another go with no suppression but to keep an eye on the larger ones and maybe start Cetrotide a little earlier.

X post Kuma it took me ages to write mine sorry! Regarding light stims, I would say that when I was stimming with 75 of gonal f for iui, I had 3 follicles by about day 12, and with 450 max dose, obviously only one follie was showing until EC. Also I've found various different websites suggesting that using the pill/down regging to suppress before a cycle can worsen the response during a stimming cycle. Some other info I found suggested that people with low amh do respond better to lower doses of stims and a forum I read about this seemed to back it up but obviously that was people's actual experience, with no science to back it up! I remember one person had got 3 or 4 follies with a low dose gonal f rather than 1 on the max dose they had got previously.

beaky Not entirely sure what tomorrow's appointment entails. We meet the fertility nurse and then the consultant. I'm guessing they'll explain a lot about the treatment but whether we actually get the cycle booked in tomorrow or not I don't know! I am obviously hoping we do but I don't know what 'normal' procedure is! Any advice?!

kuma glad I'm not the only bad Berry! I'm afraid I have no useful advice for you given my virgin status as an IVFer, but EC without any sedation definitely sounds scary! But then so does having polyps burned off - WTF!! You are nails woman! You can do anything!!

Beaky - I'm sniffing, swallowing, shoving and sticking all sorts. I've been sniffing buserelin for nearly two weeks and continue until next week (I think). I'm taking oestrogen tablets by mouth and by fanjo . There are also oestrogen patches to stick on me. Antibiotics will start next week as will the steroid Prednisolone which is for the immunes thing and the intralipid infusion is also next week. Then there are painkiller bum bullets to take before and after ET. The nurse said that these are to prevent cramping of the uterus after ET, which I thought was interesting. There's more stuff to take after ET but my mind can't take in any more info about drugs just now.

It does look like we will be in near sync Smidge. My intralipid transfusion is also booked in for the 10th - so taking the time difference into account I'll be half a day behind you with that. That secretary sounds so annoying. You've had problems with her before I think? It really is too much to have to manage AliG's staff and your own appointments. And it's shocking what you were told about the barrister - no way should a patient be given the message that their appointments play second fiddle to someone else's.

And I disagree with you Beaky. It's not true that everybody's appointments should be treated equally, Berries' appointments are far more important and should be treated accordingly.

Your explanation of intralipids to Lucie and Minx was fantastic Smidge. Thank you for that because I had no clue how they worked before I read your comments. I've always just thought of intralipids as some kind of mayonnaise after seeing a dodgy headline in the (dodgy) Daily Mail a few years back. Could I just ask if the intralipids made you put on weight Smidge*? I'm a bit obsessed about that just at the moment and I'm trying to keep from blobbing out too much. Stuffing my face with delicious food and wine in Sicily really didn't help!

That holiday place you have booked looks gorgeous Smidge. I don't know Faversham but nearby Whitstable is lovely and one of our faves for a seaside day trip. They have an Oyster festival each summer which might be on when you are there, worth checking it out. And Lisbon is a brilliant idea Tiger, I've heard very good things about it. As it happens I was, ahem, conceived there - so you never know..... try one of the waiters.

Spare your plan sounds admirable. I'm impressed with your determination to crack on and make good use of your time. You are made of stern stuff lady.

Rain hope your appointment goes well tomorrow. Funny how much of this process we go into in the dark, not knowing what to expect at our various appointments.

Barking I'm very pleased to hear that you got your oven delivered ok. I love your attitude; have problem with delivery, find solution drive van to work. It's good that your cake worked out too, baking is always a bit hit and miss with a new oven. Hope you are feeling ok now after your procedure and sorry about your dad.

Kuma I'm honestly not sure that the FC would make that much from extra medication (maybe I'm wrong) so I doubt that is the reason for suggesting it. It's interesting what Beaky said about low AMHers getting a better response on lower stimms. You're not menopausal just yet and it is worth a try if only for your own sake. I reckon you will be fine without sedation at EC, especially as you have had polyps burned off while wide awake. Barking had EC without being knocked out if I remember correctly, I'm sure you are just as tough.

Is it just me or is all this talk of lime jelly and peanut butter making you think yum yum?

Wow Wild that really is a lot of drugs!

Rain fx they get you booked in for your cycle then!

By the way I wasn't knocked out for EC either and it absolutely fucking knacked. I might just be a wimp though!

good luck today rain, & hope you feel better beaky
hallo everyone!

Just popping in reLly quickly to say good luck to all of you with appointments/test results coming up. Am lurking just no time to post properly at the moment. Cheering everyone on x

Good morning all. Masses of luck for your appointment today rain hope it gets you underway with your IVF.

beaky when is your OTD? How are you feeling? Everything very tightly crossed for you.

Great holiday plans smidge. That secretary deserves a swift kick. Cheeky mare! I hate the way that administrators are somehow able to be mini dictators and have so much control over access to treatment.

antonia sounds as though we have similar coping mechanisms. I am often to be found shoveling chocolate into my gob at times of stress, especially now I've pretty much given up wine! I'm struggling to get back into my health kick. This week has been ok, apart from dinner out last night! Flourless chilli chocolate cake with basil ice-cream. Amazing.

minx glad you're feeling excited about the open evening. It is another step closer for you!

happy sounds as though you're keeping very busy. Hope all is well - is your NHS appointment coming up?

wild that is one heck of a drug regime. Is this because you may have immune issues? I'm very interested in immune treatment as I'm really starting to think that is my issue. Some of my symptoms together with my family history are suddenly seeming to be relevant. Sorry if I've missed it, but when is your transfer date? Interesting about the ET cramping - I practiced a mediation designed to switch the muscles off and calm the area and it really worked for me (I think!)

spare have you decided on your plan?

nolly are you feeling better?

lucie I also did catching rainbows and found it useful. I listen to the mediations most days. When do you get the hidden c test results?

barking nice work on the oven and cake baking. I have adapted my baking to make it gluten free but it is more challenging and quit expensive. I find giving up wheat hard when on holiday but have adapted to it in day to day life, and I eat a lot more protein and veg as a result.

kuma it's very hard to know what to do - I think for most clinics it is trial and error as they just don't know how you will respond. What will you go for? I agree that drugs are unlikely to hold much profit for the clinic given my experience in healthcare financing but I would check what they are charging against at least one other supplier.

Phew, that was a big catch up. Haven't managed to check in for a couple days as have been quite busy sorting remortgage, holiday plans, house stuff and catching up with friends. Am in limbo land as far as fertility treatment goes. Not sure what is next after failed IVF until I can get to the GP.

Also, anyone have any skin advice? Mine is awful. I have got acne rather than spots at the moment, which is very unusual for me. I do get hormonal spots but this is worse than ever before and it is really getting me down.

tiger if you find an answer, please tell me! I have such bad acne at the moment, it's really depressing. I get lots of red painful spots around ov - they barely heal by my next cycle then it just starts again.

wild wow at all the drugs. Maybe we should start calling you Escobar!

Thanks for all the best wishes, it went well! In a nut shell I will be on long protocol, and am provisionally booked in to start with my July cycle, so day 1 being c. July 10th all the fun stuff should happen in August. is anyone else cycling then? They basically told us we were 'perfect' which is sort of reassuring but also brought on the usual "well why the fuck can't I get pregnant on my own then?".
Got my AMH result today too, 17.5 which I'd normal for my age but apparently puts me at an elevated risk of over stimulating, but they glossed over that quite quickly. Anyone else warned the same?

It's good to hear that you have been busy getting on with ordinary life things Tiger as TTC can take over at times. No solutions from me on the spots/acne I'm afraid.

That's great news that you are booked in to cycle Rain. Exciting times ahead. The whole 'unexplained' everything looks perfect thing is very frustrating. As you say, why the heck doesn't it just work then?

at Escobar Rain. Most of what I'm taking is to do with oestrogen and building the womb lining. The antibiotics are given as standard to fight off any little bugs which might affect things in there. The steroids and the intralipid infusion are because of the immunes Tiger and then I've been given some of the blood thinner stuff to counteract the blood thickening effect of the other drugs. But on the other hand they seem to give Clexane and aspirin to quite a few ladies, so....?? Who knows. I'm beyond the point where I question it and I'm just trying to take the right thing at the right time.

If there are autoimmune issues in your family Tiger then it is worth looking into the possibility that it is affecting your getting pregnant. I was prescribed the steroids and intralipid immunes protocol on the basis that my DM has lupus. That's considered a strong indicator for likely issues, plus I have underactive thyroid caused by my body attacking its own thyroid gland (clever).

Spare you mentioned Doxycycline (sp?) - I was given this during stimms. I know it's used to tackle any infections which might be causing problems but I was only given it for seven days, so I'm not convinced that would make much difference. Thirty days - as is being suggested for you - would have more of an impact. I have say that I didn't like being on it as it upset my stomach unless I was very careful to take it with food.

Lovely day here. Hope you are all enjoying it.

Tiger I had the same problem after my previous IVF, the spots were on my face neck and back of neck they started to clear up on my face when I started using the Clinique deep cleaning brush that vibrates(!) (like a clarisonic) but by the time I started this IVF they hadn't all gone so they are now having another flare up. It's so depressing eh. You sound like you've been so busy, you will definitely need your holiday when that comes round! Otd is next week, I don't have much in the way of symptoms etc, and the occasional crampiness is definitely the progesterone. Pffftt I am not sure what to do about testing though.

Rain woohoo to getting a date! You must be pleased to finally be able to get on with it! What drugs will you be using? (Lol at asking that question all casual like)

Wild your head must be boggled. I'd say it takes all the effort ever to just remember what to take and when!

I read an article in the Guardian last night about "women waiting too long" to have a baby because they can have IVF and the writer basically blames "society treating women unfairly if they do have one early". All of these articles just piss me off. I can't imagine for a minute actually wanting to go through this, i.e. Dildocamming, bloods, painful procedures, being told/experiencing awful news/things that you would never normally know about, eternal waiting, more crap news, stabbing yourself, shoving massive pellets up your arse/fanjo, 2/3 times a day. People won't even go for a goddam smear test never mind this shit. I'm mean, who writes these fucking articles that they think we are all merrily waiting at home thinking, "Ooo I'll have IVF in the future cause the NHS will pay". Arghhhhh. This helps no one.

Sorry for the angry venty rant berries, just needed to clear that up

Waves at Nolly - when will you get cycle dates for IVF?

Waves to Happy I hope work isn't too full on - I bet it's not too long til summer hols though

beaky you're so right, those articles really infuriate me. Even if there are a handful of women who think science will ensure they have babies when they're ready and not before, lumping all of us under the same banner is ridiculous. Only someone who has never experienced infertility would think its the result of some sort of fucking 'lifestyle choice'. I wager I'd have been just as infertile in my twenties as I am now.

The two drugs I remember are buserelin and menopur. No idea what either of them are so will be off doing some googling tonight! There was definitely at least one more but I can't remember what. They're all stabby ones, that's all I remember! We have our 'implications' appointment booked for a few days after CD1 next month when I'll find out more about all the drug malarkey. I'm quite glad in a way that I am still fairly clueless as I'm hoping it'll stop me obsessing at least a little bit while I wait.

Is it weird that I only now feel like a proper member of the 'infertile' gang? I mean, obviously I have been for 3 years now but it's like stepping on to the IVF path has made it official like. Do I get a badge? Or maybe a sash?