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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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Bumsnet: we're raising our bums after TTC and waiting for our Angry Pubes.

996 replies

purdiepie · 15/04/2015 18:26

Do you like feeling left out of a group? Do you enjoy being marginalised and isolated and picked-on? How about a good bullying? If so..you're in t'wrong place, cock, coz this 'ere is the TTC thread where you feel loved, embraced, encouraged, wanted, lusted after, admired, respected, thought-of with fondness, missed when you're away. We will even put up with your lazy, selfish bastard of a husband who would rather watch Chelsea romp through the Premiership than put a baby in your tum-tum.

Absolutely any old slag welcome, unless you already have a baby in your tum-tum and we're about as familiar with you as a condom. You can get lost Smile

t'STATS, innit

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eskimolaura · 16/04/2015 20:07

aux Thanks for the fact. Dachshunds are hounds, which is my favourite group in the dog world and in my book, they are all fab, but I think they have been interfered with too much and they look a bit deformed... Sad

Purdie Still got my FX for you for this job. You sounded very collected in your interview apart from your oozing vaginal juices

Sparkly Your emotions must be all over the place! Still got my FX for you (and every other part of me- even my legs- DH couldn't get to my foof even if I wanted him to!)

Babs Congratualtions my lovely. Grin

Boris Good news about the bloods

Glittery The buns look amazing. (And the cakes don't look bad either, nudge, nudge, wink, wink Wink )

Bit of singing for you now, prepare yourselves:

(To the tune of one man went to mow): One more pill to go, to go before Aunt Flo. One pill, one pill, one pill, one pill, one p-I-I-I-I-lllll to go!

(To the tune of 21 seconds to go, innit) I got one more pill to go, I got one more pill to go.... hums the rest of the song whilst peering around fearfully and wondering why no-one else is singing- it's a bus innit? Gees...

frogbubbles · 16/04/2015 20:08

Sparkly he is such a sucker, he will see a waitress/waiter regardless of how snooty/unhelpful/disinterested they are and feel sorry for them and therefore always leaves big tips. He drives me crazy with it!! Ha ha.

Purdie it sounds like the interview went well, good luck I'll have my fx for you.

Glittery, baby bombed in your own kitchen. Fudging Hell!!!!

eskimolaura · 16/04/2015 20:11

Oops, forgot to say yay nomio Hurrah for clomid! You deserve it after that catastrophic fuck up from your previous surgery. Also, I'm well jell. I am getting more and more sure that my hormones are screwed and I will need help, starting with a shit load of clomid and gallons of lube. Grin

Mummyofonesofar · 16/04/2015 20:16

babs yay for BFP!

Nomio that sounds well worth the £300! Glad you've got what you wanted, next stop - BFP for you too!!

glittery please share pics if you make them. Look gorgeous, so many good bakers on here. Sorry about the being baby bombed. She sounds selfish with the wedding lark!!

ibeka is it better to know all that? To be able to expect more mc just be hard. I hope you don't have the placebo and you get a sticky BFP soon. If it worked and you got the sticky BFP they give you more to reduce the risk of pre term birth etc?

Purdey it sounds like the interview was fab. We had some right plebs working in IT when I worked in the council but the ones who weren't plebs were great to look at, and smart too - very attractive. You'll have fun ??.

chops & babs should we all be having less sex then?!

Aux thanks for the factoid!

frog you too!? My dp hates it when I complain about anything. Like the time I sent back peppercorn sauce twice during one meal because they hadn't made it with peppercorns and second time they had just added more pepper powder Hmm

Eskimo loved the singing! Great that you'll be seeing AF again!

Sparkly123 · 16/04/2015 20:16

Glittery get this woman out of the kitchen! Oooft. I cannot be doing with that kinda wedding obsessed bridezilla me me me nonsense. And now this! You will show her when your BFP comes along!! I'm so sorry to hear about your uncle also lovely. That's heartbreaking. Flowers

Sparkly123 · 16/04/2015 20:20

Eskimo leave those legs open!! Ha ha. Thanks sweetheart Flowers

Purdie me, I thought I was ok but stood up a minute ago and more blood again .. Everytime it happens I freak out and my mood changes. But then, if I think logically- I have had exactly the same bleeding for three days and the lining is still there and the hcg is stronger.. So it doesn't mean it's over. Right?! The blood is freaking me out - just seeing it is hard. Any every twinge is scaring me! I sound like a looney.. Confused I have to keep it together!!

MarysPrayer · 16/04/2015 20:20

Evening everyone Smile Only took me about an hour to catch up. Confused

Ibeka I'm so sorry about your results. Let's hope you're on the medication and that it works. It must be so hard not knowing Flowers

Sparkly hang on in there my lovely. There's a whole bus load on your side. xx

Purdie thanks for your message last night (re my friend) You're dead right and I am just a bit paranoid over-sensitive atm. Had a mighty good chuckle at vadge-squelching handsomeness Grin

Glittery, your dh's colleague is a bit of twunt hey? Can I be your SIL please - mmmmm cake. Cake

Aux t'is a shame about pedigree inbreeding. It so often leads to faults and suffering imo. I used to like dogs but I'm more of a rabbit lover now BABS!!! congrats!!! xx

Great news for you cariad. xx

frogbubbles · 16/04/2015 20:21

Mummy we once went to this country pub and there was a massive curly hair on one of my chips. I wanted to send it back and told me to stop being awkward and just push it to the side of my plate!!! Grrrr.

eskimolaura · 16/04/2015 20:22

Ibeka I don't know what to say my lovely, but please know that we are all here for you and hopefully what sparkly said about that Emmerdale bird will give you some hope Flowers Flowers

MarysPrayer · 16/04/2015 20:23

Purdie sounds like your interview went well. Fx my friend.

eskimolaura · 16/04/2015 20:26

Thanks Mummy Can you join in next time though please, so I don't look like such a weirdo? Wink

You made me laugh about 8 pages ago, but I can't remember why Hmm

GlitteryLipgloss1 · 16/04/2015 20:28

Frog. My. God. Any hair near my plate and it's in the bin. Arrh!
Thanks Sparkly. It's my dad's brother so seeing my dad get choked after visiting him (he takes him up those mini bottles of beer and sits and listens to music bless em) it's hard. It's his baby brother. I just couldn't imagine seeing one of my siblings go through that. The human spirit is amazing. (Like yours)

Aux - just saw a sausage dog pool party video on fb. So cute!

Rainy34 · 16/04/2015 20:29

Babs thats fantastic congratulations on your bfp!!

Glitterylipgloss those cakes look lush, best of luck and you have to pass round some of those cakes for us !!

Nomio fantastic that you have been given 100mg of Clomid and the progesterone, got a good feeling about you!!!

Ibeka sorry to hear your news, really hope you are not on the placebo, try and keep positive xx

Purdie fx you get the job, sounds like you handled yourself well, and it will have been good experience for you!!

Pixa · 16/04/2015 20:31

Okay, quick update whilst DHs birthday Katsu Curry is cooking...

Nomio sounds like £300 very well spent. Grin

Ibeka, sorry to hear your news. I hope you're feeling as well as you can. Please feel free to rant here if needed Thanks

Purdie I love your honesty. Your interview sounds positive. In relation to ICT, I thought the standard answer was 'turn it off, then back on again.' Wink

Glittery I get lots of my cake bits from eBay, 't is fabulous. Sorry about the baby bomb. I have had four recently. Sad I empathise.

Chops and Baps your stories of BFPs really do give me hope. I have an unspoken fear about DHs sperm. We never talk about it. I am sure it is.the elephant in the room though, he has suggested a SA numerous times

Sparkly and Yokyil thank for the cheers! Sex wear has been purchased, as has champagne for tomorrow, hotel have been instructed with a time to bring the ice bucket. Pre-seed has been packed. I will get a BFP this month or I will break down. How are you both feeling?

Sparkly I really hope the next couple of weeks goes quickly for you, and I hope you have a sticky bean. I will be praying for you.

MarysPrayer · 16/04/2015 20:33

I can't remember either, maybe it was the LTB thingy. I now have '21 seconds to go' stuck in my head. And 'the wheels on the bus', randomly.

5dpo, wtf cycle, soo bored. ...

frogbubbles · 16/04/2015 20:35

Glittery I think I might have managed about three mouthfuls while gipping and then left it. It's a bit of a running joke if there is ever hair on plates in restaurants it's always on mine. Gross!!

Pixa · 16/04/2015 20:36

Frog that always happens to me too! I end up never returning to that restaurant too. It's a pain.

spinningirl10 · 16/04/2015 20:39

Victoria and Babs, did you really only have sex twice all month? Or do you mean just twice at ov time? What about the thing with the sperm needing to be fresh?

frogbubbles · 16/04/2015 20:40

Pixa it's horrible isn't it, I think the worst was finding a uncooked defrosted soggy chip in my salad. I told the waitress and she said do you want it changing?? Erm yeah??

eskimolaura · 16/04/2015 20:45

Yes Marys! Yes it was the LTB thing! I totally forgot to tell DH about that... but then he might ask why it came up in the first place... Hmm I was up marking well into the night last night and I think it addled my brain slightly Confused

Random fact: We buy Tesco's own brand teabags. They are circular. Every time one of us reaches the bottom of the tea jar, there is a random suspiciously square teabag at the bottom. No-one uses it. Ever. We don't know where it came from. It just lies there at the bottom of the jar, being... different. No-one uses it, but no-one gets rid of it either. It just gets covered over with a load of new, circular teabags. Perhaps one day, we will uncover it, reach for the new packet of familiar, rounded teabags and we will have run out? Perhaps one day, it will get its chance to meet boiled water and milk? Perhaps. Until then, it lurks... waiting.

Yokyil · 16/04/2015 20:47

All quiet at this end Pixa 4dpo - bored bored bored. Catching up on obem and other dirt tv first dates I found the gown Grin

MarysPrayer · 16/04/2015 20:48

Poor tea-bag Sad Or maybe lucky tea bag, having not yet been boiled alive.

MarysPrayer · 16/04/2015 20:49

Yokyil I'm 5dpo, yes t'is boring hey?

spinningirl10 · 16/04/2015 20:50

Ah Glittery, that's shit and in your own kitchen! The wedding thing sounds nuts!

Purdie, fx for the job. You are clearly the best candidate and if they can't see that it's their loss! I think you'd brighten up any officeGrin

Eskimo, yay for one more pillSmile

Pixa, have a lovely evening tomorrow. Are you away for the whole weekend?

Eskimo, love the random tea bag story but I feel sorry for it, sat there on its own being tossed aside because it's the wrong shape Hmm

Yokyil enjoy your trashy tv. love I found the gown

Mummyofonesofar · 16/04/2015 20:50

frog bleurgh! I would have been pushing for not paying for it at all and getting a new one! I complain everywhere I need to. Returning a garden chair to Argos tomorrow and dp is refusing to come with me. I am a professional complainer.

Eskimo I am always singing Grin hahaha teabag story!!

Pixa DH sounds like a very lucky man!! How you have a great baby making weekend away.