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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

The Bumsnet/Angry Pubes Bus

999 replies

Nomio230 · 27/03/2015 13:57

If you like to talk rubbish & refuse to give up your seat for anyone, this is the place for you! Come and ebjoy our Zen Den & a Nutella Cellar. Grin
No LPBs allowed. Angry

OP posts:
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18
ThePug · 29/03/2015 14:47

I don't really get why people have to "announce" everything on FB these days. I didn't announce anything about getting engaged or even about our wedding - people who I actually still speak to knew because they'd seen/spoken with me. There was no reason why anyone else people I went to school / uni with years ago needed to be informed. I did update my pic with a wedding photo afterwards though, because obviously they're nice photos!

As & when I get pregnant I don't plan on putting anything about it on fb (apart from in our lovely group).

victoria401 · 29/03/2015 14:48

I would obviously tell my mum and it would just spread naturally around the whole family like wildfire within minutes! As for work people usually bring in cakes and scribble "baby cakes - Victoria" on a piece of kitchen towel...

ThePug · 29/03/2015 14:51

Oh night that one is particularly horrendous.

Oyster Any developments on knicker watch yet?

I haven't checked my cm or cervix position yet today as DH woke up in the mood so there is misleading material in situ wish we had an eye rolling icon, I would use it a lot

nightandthelight · 29/03/2015 14:51

I have the problem of divorced parents and divorced ILs to consider. The news won't spread naturally so I will have to decide who knows first and then face the wrath of the others Sad

Pixa · 29/03/2015 14:54

Night I am always happy to try and be supportive.

I have no idea how to announce or to who, when it happens. We're in a really tricky situation with family. My younger sister miscarried last year. She was in a very bad place. Financially, she was in lots of debt and getting kicked out of her house due to rent arrears. Emotionally her relationship with her OH was fractured. She announced her unplanned pregnancy to me a few days before my wedding. I tried to be supportive. She miscarried twins about 6 weeks later.

She has since moved back to our mum's, and has separated from her OH. She knows DH and I had been talking about TTC-ing, but has since expressed that if DH and I did fall pregnant then it wouldn't be fair. I am dreading it. It fills me with absolute guilt. We have been planning TTC-ing for so so very long, and practically I know we can't put our lives on hold until my sister is okay, but it's never going to be easy.

Sorry! Longer post than I thought and a bit of a downer too - I suppose it just highlights how important it is to me that announcements are a nightmare, you never know who is reading them and what's going on.

Do you ever give any thought as to how you will announce when it's time?

Pikz · 29/03/2015 14:55

The announcements are always a bit yuck.

When I was pregnant with DS only my mum, DH and best mate knew til 16 weeks. I rang my bro and aunts and uncles personally. Told my closest friends myself and Facebook only found out when I was photographed with a bump at a wedding. Think I was about 6/7 months gone at that point.

tessiegirl · 29/03/2015 14:59

Sorry you were baby bombed night Sad Crap.

ThePug · 29/03/2015 15:00

Pikz that sounds ideal to me.

I will have to tell my business partner sooner rather than later as we'll have to work out what we're going to do whilst I'm off work (errrrrr no idea yet!) and I'd feel weird discussing with him before my family knew, so parents and siblings will be told at the same time I think.

Pixa That is as tough one. Are you and your sister close? Surely she cannot rationally expect you to wait for her to a) get a new OH and then b) become pregnant before you are 'allowed' to try? And anyway, you're the older sister. I'm hoping my older sister (who I think is also ttc at the moment) will get pregnant soon or I think she'll be miffed that I've done so first!

nightandthelight · 29/03/2015 15:02

Oh pixa many many Flowers for you, that is a horrible situation for all involved Sad you are right though that you can't put your life on hold for your sister. When you do get your BFP it will be hard for her I imagine but she will have a niece/nephew to look forward to and her time will come again. Sounds like she has had a dreadful time of it recently and I really hope that things improve for her very soon.

I really am stuck with announcements. Will probably put it off for as long as possible and only tell people when I am showing (this is all based on me actually getting a bfp in the first place).

FB will probably find out when someone eventually posts a photo of me where there is no hiding the bump!

juneybean · 29/03/2015 15:03

Hi loves thanks so much for your words! I did go out last night and told them all about what I'd been up to and they were empathetic! (Purds twasn't book club, but local MNers!)

The thing with the superdonor is it's 50 babies in one year, so there's a good likelihood of my child being the same year at secondary school with a half-sibling... it's worrying! But it's certainly an option!

I've stuffed myself with Parkin (a morrison's find!) and am looking forward to April with new hope!

I haven't caught up I must admit, but yay for BFP's and boo to any AF's if there is any?!

Pixa · 29/03/2015 15:11

Thank you for being so understanding Night. I worry about her so much, we used to be quite close but since the wedding and miscarriage we have really drifted apart. I really worry that she is letting the grief consume her - it is understandable, I feel awful that I can't empathise because I haven't had that experience but I can sympathise. It's just a bridge we have to cross when we get to it.

Announcements are hard. I am sure you will announce it beautiful beautifully and tactfully when the time comes. Smile It's a very joyous time.

nightandthelight · 29/03/2015 15:13

Aww thanks pixa fx for both of us!

Pixa · 29/03/2015 15:14

Pug that is exactly what she wishes will happen, that we will wait until she has a child, but it's just not feasible. DH wants to be young enough to be an active parent. We have planned it for so long and we are so very ready to be parents. It's been hard waiting this long.

I just wish she knew how much we all cared.

Woolly84 · 29/03/2015 15:17

Phew, chores done and rewarded with an M&S Belgian choc & toffee hot cross bun (highly recommended!!)

pixa that sounds like a tough situation but as the others say, you have to live your life and I'm sure you've been v supportive of her and shared in her tough times, and I think the same applies in sharing the happy times too so I hope she is supportive when the time comes. Smile

Woolly84 · 29/03/2015 15:21

juney is there anybody you could talk locally to who's been through a similar experience?

ThePug · 29/03/2015 15:24

Pixa When the time comes, maybe you could tell her first, on her own, away from anybody else. Give her space to be upset without everyone else in the family jumping up and down excitedly for you.

Woolly We had those hot cross buns last week and they were very yummy. I like mine toasted though but was worried about the choc/toffee bits melting in the toaster so had them cold. Yummy, but more like brioche.

How is it almost 3.30 already?? Where has the day gone??! in bed procreating if your name is night

DizzyMerry · 29/03/2015 15:26

Pixa that's a very difficult situation to be in. Sorry your dsis had a miscarriage and such an awful time. However, it is unfair for you to have to put ttc on hold and as you say you've been planning ttc for very long. It's an unfortunate situation but I honestly feel that she shouldn't expect you not to carry on with ttc. Hope things get better for her and also that you can both come closer again Flowers

We told my mum and mil when we conceived. I told my dsis's the day after, which they weren't too pleased that they hadn't been told the same day I got my bfp! They were overjoyed though. The rest of the family just found from there, though DH told his sisters himself as they share a close relationship. I think we will do the same this time when I get my bfp.
I'm so excited for those of you due to POAS. Fx for you all

ThePug · 29/03/2015 15:26

Woah just seen your post about the 50 kids per year Juney . That is a lot, and I guess does increase the chances of them being in the same class at school. Does he have a complete monopoly in your area? How did you find out about him? There must be someone similar in another part of the country you could try

eskimolaura · 29/03/2015 15:27

Oh my gosh, Woolly toffee and choc?! They didn't have any of those when I went in yesterday!

DizzyMerry · 29/03/2015 15:28

Ah Pixa I think thepug is spot on with her advice. That seems like the way forward

MelonMelon · 29/03/2015 15:35

Happy to share my exploding ovaries with the entire bus

Pixa · 29/03/2015 15:35

Thank you ladies for your kind words and advice. I feel like I am getting ahead of myself a bit - I actually need to find out if I can get pregnant first. Great idea though ThePug, it is likely what we will do.

Juney, was that with a 50 odd mile radius from you? Are there any alternative sueprdonors in a a different location?

juneybean · 29/03/2015 15:38

Right have briefly read back over, glad to see some familiar faces have found us from the other buses and welcome to our lovely newbies.

I've hopefully got the stats up to date!

###STATS###

How was your meal Beansprout?

Spinning your banoffee pie looked lush! Is there any left?!

sammy dominos is definitely the best pizza but so expensive, our local pizza takeaway you can get a 10inch pizza for £5.00! Also your temp still looks pretty high to me!

Clumpy, globulous sperm... sounds lush Purds ... regardless I'm totes excited for you!!

Sparkly how do you use your preseed? I inserted inside this month as I'd read on another forum that it seemed to hinder the spermies when done in the syringe with them (perhaps bringing it to body temp helps?)

And oooo I have a friend that lives in KDY!

I'm terrible I don't like lumpy ice cream so Ben & Jerry's is out for me :( except karamel sutra that's quite smooth...

dojo your symptoms sound well exciting! You POAS'd yet?

I have brazil nuts downstairs, am I supposed to be eating them?

Brickie I think the pregnant cervix thing doesn't kick in until well after a positive test? Moreso when the mucous plug is forming?

Sorry for your dip oyster what dpo are you?

Sorry for the fb baby bomb night :( sometimes it's tempting to deactivate isn't it?

juneybean · 29/03/2015 15:40

I read about the 50 mile radius because he offers "free" donations within 50 mile so I guess some of them could be outwith the 50 mile. I just know he's helped a number of couples in the town where my child would go to secondary school. But he does say he has their names and everyone has been very good at "sharing" so who knows? I guess the realist in me thinks well it's 50 these past two years, but it could be 100 by 2017?

Woolly84 · 29/03/2015 15:45

Hehe love exploding ovaries Grin

Yes good advice pug I think it would make a big difference telling her alone first.
Oh and we had them cold too, too impatient to heat them up! eskimo they were an impulse purchase right by the tills and of course we gave in!