We might be over 40 but we are young at heart, taking our supplements, shagging on time and waiting for the precious BFP!Over 40's TTC, join us here...

[Gumblossom]

Starting the new thread, Cloudjumper.

Anyone over 40, trying to conceive, whether it is your first or 6th (or more), we're facing the obstacles together.

I've been at it for 6 years now, but there are plenty of good news stories from these threads over the years.

Come and join us with your worries, woes,successes and milestones, we are here to support one another in our quest.

Thank you cloud and fatty. I am surprised at how together I feel. I suppose I did all my crying 2 weeks ago at the first scan. It's the reality and I just have to accept it. I am not looking forward to mc for the 4th time in less than 3 years. It is so grim but at least I know what to expect.

The sonographer and radiographer were quite upset as they said they were hopeful after the last scan and strangely that gives me some comfort.

I spoke to the consultant who said there is nothing they can do for me and suggested private ivf.

I'm feeling like nature has decided to give us a life without children and for now I have to cling on to that and all the benefits that come with it.

annie Whoa, that is a bit harsh of your consultant - 'nothing they can do for you'?! Honestly? After 4 consecutive mcs, they should be offering you lots of tests - have you had any after your previous mcs? NHS policy is that after 3 mcs, they will check your hormone levels, do karyotyping of you and your partner, check your uterus and test your baby to see if they can determine what caused the mc. This should have nothing to do with age, if this is what the consultant was referring to (I seriously hope he wasn't), I had all of these tests done at 40+.
If you feel up for it, I would go back and question this remark, maybe you can ask for a different consultant?

Thanks Cloud but I was fortunate to have had all the chromosome testing done after my second mc - they were very good to me in that respect in the NHS. I think he was referring to the fact that I've had Clomid, 1 round of IVF and all the recurrent mc tests and testing on tissue and it really is the end of the treatments they can offer me.

I do get pregnant but they just don't get past 6.5 weeks. I really think it is chromosomal problems resulting from poor egg quality and there is nothing that anyone can do.

I opted for natural mc so have to keep busy now before cramps start. Have the mahoosive sanny pads and co-codamol at the ready! It's SO grim you have to keep good humoured to get through it!! I'm seriously booking a decent holiday that involves hot sun and an infinity pool as a reward for this shit!!

I'm wrong- this one got to 7w+2d so that's an achievement but it's indicative of chromosomal mismatch I'm sure.

Anyway! I'm having the day off today so off to do something cathartic like throwing my old clothes out.

Really sorry to read this news Annie

Oh dear, the despair has hit me. This really is final. So so sad.

Gosh, the TTC rollercoaster's in full swing ...

Calibee - many congrats on your twins - how wonderful and just a little daunting!

Annie - big hugs, so sorry for your loss.
Infinity pool sounds like a plan. After that, maybe private IVF really would be the way to go? I'd be quite buoyed up that your consultant must have thought it'd be worthwhile (and isn't talking giving up, adoption or fostering like that nutter midwife). Do you think IVF might help pick out a 'good egg'. You have great AMH don't you? You'd probably get enough eggs to do PGD / array CGH with IVF? Anyway, all in good time, do look after yourself first.

No news from me really. I'm waiting for AF in what's turning into an interminable cycle in which cysts on ovary resolved. I'm CD37 if I count from day 1, but I basically bled from CD1-19 (last AF then cysts), so maybe ... oh I've no idea. Definitely not pregnant - done tests. I just need AF again so I can get back to the TTC drawing board, including re-starting the supplements that I've kind of given up on. I stopped the DHEA, partly because I ran out and partly because the specialist sonographer who found my cysts suggested that the DHEA might've caused them. I think DHEA can increase estrogen? So maybe she's right?

But on the long cycles, Gerald you have my sympathy. Did you get your blood tests done with the GP?

Thanks chewy. My last mc was from ivf frozen transfer in feb.

I think pgd is an option if I can find somewhere that does it but I'm not sure we can afford it again. I'll look into it and the other thing you mentioned just incase we decide to do something. Im not sure I can take anymore.

My AMH was 14.5 last summer. I think that's why I've been pg 4 times in 2.5 years.

I'm so sorry Annie. I know how awful MMC feels. Look after yourself.

So sorry Annie. Such sad news.
Glad dd is on the mend mustbemad. Good luck with starting try again.

So sorry annie. I had really high hopes for all you pg ladies on here. It always makes me sad when I hear of one that doesn't work out.

Give yourself a nice break and then start to think about your options with a clear head.

Keeping fingers crossed for gum, cloud and grizzer. Good luck with the next scans.

I'm currently cd22 (I think) so a few days away from potential af. Have already got that pre-menstrual crampy feeling so not really expecting this month's outcome to be any different from the last 23

Thank you joey for your lovely message and thanks ladies for all your support over these past few weeks.

I'll have a break now and if we decide to continue ttc-ing I'll come back.

All the best to everyone trying to get pregnant and sending all the positive healthy pregnancy vibes I have left to Grizzler, Cloud Flotillas and Gum xxxx

I am so sorry, Annie! You sound like you really are keeping your calm. Holiday sounds like a good idea...... On having done all testing, was reproductive immunolgy included? It is not in normal panel. Of course this immunology stuff is in this sense useless that if you have issues no one knows whether treatment currently offered really helps and not many immunolgy issues even show up on the tests they currently do. But it seems worth the trouble to control for that before spending once more on IVF.

Hi Jass thank you for being so kind in all your posts. DH is away with work so I'm going to take a co-codamol and try to sleep until tomorrow.

I'm not sure, we both had cytogenetics tests and I had Routine Coagulation, Anti-cardiolipin antibody, Lupus Anticoagulant and Anticardiolipin. We both had Anti-HB core, HIV antibody, HCV antibody, Hep B.

I joined the recurrent miscarriage thread and its been suggested I get tested for NK cells and a second opinion about treatment for PCOS. It helps to find solutions right now but really i think once I'm over the physical side of this and the hormones leave me it will be easier to accept.

Annie, I hope your dreams come true. You deserve it

Oh Annie, I am so sorry lovely, it is just not fair. It seems such a little thing we ask: for our own happy ending, and yet it is so difficult. I do hope you can have a lovely holiday somewhere warm, recharge your batteries and look at your options. ((hugs))

I got a letter from my Dr yesterday: dated the 28th May. I had the ultrasound on the 25th, and she couldn't talk to me on the 26th as she is "away on holiday", but miraculously, I have a signed letter from her dated the 28th. It is to inform me that my Vit D is super low and to start supplementing at 5000units a day for a month. Nothing about the ultrasound. How frustrating.

I am now worried that I hadn't been aware of the deficiency and so it may have affected the baby somehow. I've started supplementing, but still I worry. Of course I spend a lot of time trying to prepare myself for the worst, despite feeling sick etc, because I know my symptoms carried on when I had mmc's. It is a total mindf#*k. I will try to hold off the scan till 9-10 weeks as with my last miscarriage the baby measured 9+2, so I will wait until after that if I can.

The next 3 -4 weeks can't go fast enough. I am so bloody tired and just can't sleep for all the worry. This really is not for the faint of heart is it? It always amazes me how strong women are in these circumstances.

Jass, are you testing soon?

Vortex, many products say that to cover themselves. I am sure the vitex is fine. It's like progesterone cream, which many women use in the two and early pregnancy: it has warnings not to be used in pregnancy. My Doctor has given it the go ahead though.

Chewy,how long have you been on the DHEA? I think you are not supposed to take it for longer than 4 months in a row. Maybe you should have a break from it?

cloud, were you able to make another scan appointment before you go on holiday?

All the best everyone. xxx

So sorry news to hear your news Annie,thinking of you x

I am so sorry Annie. I do hope you get that holiday booked.

Gum this is such a worrying time for you. Could one of the other doctors give you some reassurance re the vit D levels if your GP us away? Surely if it was a real concern then they would have called you? I don't think that you or any one on this thread could be described as faint hearted - just the opposite in fact. Wishing you all the best until the next milestone.

Grizzer thanks so much for your kind words. How did your MW appt go? Noting to wait until your scan.

Ladies good luck with testing and sending positive vibes to those in the 12 WW. Xx

Indeed Annie, recovery first! I just felt that it was a bit weird your doc suggests you do another IVF when tou obviously have a first tri recurrent mc problem. It may be it can not be addressed, but you may be a lucky one who will find and answer and for whom the treatment works. Nothing is guaranteed, but indeed NK cells need to be looked into before you go into next IVF. PCOS can cause mc, too, and it is treatable to some extent, I have understood, but I have not read up on it as do not have PCOS.

Gum, how deficinet on vit D you were? If by say 20% less than minimal good level it is no worry at all - recommendations were updated lately, prob to create more business to supplement providers:-) I am sure this is not too bad!

I'm currently in hospital with dd. She's having an operation on her ear that may mean she doesn't need her hearing aid. We are waiting for her to be taKen down which is the worst bit!
My MW appt was fine thanks mustbe. Just lots of forms & then they said I was high risk & would be under a consultant. I already knew that though! One more week til next scan. Still no symptoms.....

So sorry Annie. Hope you manage to get a holiday booked

Chewy I saw the GP yesterday and she said my day 3 fsh was 5, so she didn't think I was menopausal. I did give a big cheer when she said that! She said that hopefully the long cycle was just a blip. She did look back at some of my previous fsh results from a couple of years ago and they were scarily in the teens. I haven't had a chance to do any thinking or googling about what that means.

Anyway she was really lovely and said that she would be happy to refer me back to gynae if I wanted to look more at the fertility side of things. I really need to broach it with Dh but he has come to terms with our situation and thinks we are too old to have another child. So I doubt he will want any further investigations or treatment.

Best wishes to everyone else

Hi all. I am nervously dipping my foot in these waters - I casually removed my coil last Sept. I've just kind of transitioned into actively TTC but realise it's pretty late days. Great to find this thread.

Welcome Goodbye! Can I ask how old you are and are you TTC #1? This is such a lovely positive and supportive thread - I'm a newbie too. Best of luck!

Grizzer I do hope all is well with your DD's op. My 12year old has a good school pal who needs hearing aids and it hasn't held her back in anyway. She's one of the brain boxes and on every sports team.