We might be over 40 but we are young at heart, taking our supplements, shagging on time and waiting for the precious BFP!Over 40's TTC, join us here...

[Gumblossom]

Starting the new thread, Cloudjumper.

Anyone over 40, trying to conceive, whether it is your first or 6th (or more), we're facing the obstacles together.

I've been at it for 6 years now, but there are plenty of good news stories from these threads over the years.

Come and join us with your worries, woes,successes and milestones, we are here to support one another in our quest.

Reni,its even possible to go overboard and not pee it out, I think vit D has a capabilty to accumulate unnecessarily, but most of thr stuff indeed gets peed out!

Gerald, how old are you, if your doc is testing menopause wise, or are you at risk of an early one? Sorry I do not remember. One longish cycle means probably nothing, so hopefully the tests will not reveal anything but the fact that you are still ovulating.

Chewy, I agree that d&c gives you a brand new lining and especially those with suspected immune issues can always benefit from a thorugh clean-out. As I jad it twice this time, I should be nice and shiny - not to add that every d&c adds to your chance of getting ashermans or diffuse adenomyosis. The last one I have anyway, and the first one can not really develop if I have cleanouts twice a year at least, which has usulaly been the case for me..... i did take soy this cycle in the hope of getting less wtfish cycle, we will see. I should then ovulate middle of the next week, and even if we are not ttc this cycle I hope I can see a proper ov.

Sorry about AFs, AF-like feelings and on-site builders. I lived 2000 km away from builders when we renovated our house which created a whole different lot of problems with supervision:-) Hate repair works!

jass I'm 42 and a half! When I was ttc my first I was really regular. It took about 5 years in total and I don't remember any long cycles. In the last couple of years however I have become really irregular. Mostly between 28 and 33 but a few in the 40s and 50s. Is thus just what happens as you get older? And not necessarily mean anything too bad?

I think as we advance in age the cycles can go weird different ways. Mine has shortened, for example. I got short LP which was not an issue before. Maybe longer cycles mean indeed that body is tired of ovulating and is taking its time. But if you still ov, it does not matter - only one good egg needed, after all!

Another cycle with a BFN for me. My AF hormones seem particularly bad this month. Friday before AF kicked in I had sore throat, cold symptoms, a migraine headache and nausea, yesterday I just got really really angry all of a sudden and wanted to smash the house up and today I have been jittery and had my first panic attack in years. I feel very, very odd.

Have booked up with the doctors to try and get some tests done... two weeks is the closest appointment :( I have tried to stay calm about the lack of a BFP so far as I know it is going to take longer but this month I am just utterly fed up.

Sorry for a moany, me post when I have only been trying such a short time.

Oh ozmund, sorry to hear you are having a bad time. The BFN's can be very upsetting. And it really doesn't help when AF hormones make you feel unwell and upset. Hang in there.

I'm in the middle of my LP and my breasts are very tender and feel huge. Not impressed, they keep getting in the way,and if DS knocks me (which he seems to do all the time) it is excruciating. If this is just a symptom of being perimenopausal, then I'm none too impressed Will I have to endure this for months (or years) every damned month. If it is a precursor to a BFP, then that's okay!

I have to run - I am making myself go to the gym despite feeling tired, I know I will feel better for it.

I hope everyone is ok. How are you cloud?

I hope Ozmund you get some info from tests, but often they say nothing and then it is just down to perseverance - if you continue trying, you get there!

Gum, sorry about your bad feelings as well.

I have been having ewcm on my presumed cycle days 11-13, was puzzled by perfect white ov strips (but happy that at least they are certainly not seeing any leftover hcg at least), finally today the line starts ro appear. I have never had ewcm without surge. Weird. But I expect the surge tomorrow then....Not ttc, just want my cycle back here!

Sorry the disappointment is hitting hard Ozmund.
Can anyone remind me how long I should expect to bleed for after a miscarriage? It's been more than a week and it's not stopping yet. It's light, but persistent. I'm getting fed up with it.

fromwest I think the bleeding post-mc really varies from person to person. I wouldn't worry too much about it, unless it gets really heavy, or you feel really drained and tired (well, even more than just because of what you have been through), if that happens, call your GP/hospital. Just keep an eye out for signs of infection (I've had that, and it's mainly noticeable by the, ahem, smell). Insult to injury, eh? Hope you start feeling better soon, are you off work?

I'm OK, I guess. 5+1 today, and in limbo. No symptoms, but I never have any that early, they usually start around 7-8 weeks for me. Still feeling detached and numb, burying myself in work. I can't help looking at my calendar to see how it would affect things if I miscarry at Week X or Y, i.e. around DS's birthday, or our summer holiday It's such a headf**k.

Thanks Cloud. I guess I just have to be patient. Fortunately I work mostly from home, so I've been able to carry on as normal. Just on the Monday I came out of hospital I was seeing spots before my eyes if I moved around too much, but from the Tuesday I was ok, just a little more tired in the evening than usual. By now, a week and a half on, I feel completely normal, which is why I just want to stop bleeding and move on.
I totally recognise all the feelings of detachment and mc thoughts you describe. I really hope this one will be a happy ending for you.

Cloud, indeed, it is rubbish how our head prepares for everything - even picking up the best week to mc! Mine did the same this time and the creepiest thing is it did happen then. Several times I said to myself that if I mc, then pls at least not before.... And the baby's heart stopped two days after that...RMC is so shit, but today you are pg, no spotting, and not everyone has symptoms!

Fromwest, how is hpt? Is it neg or looking consistently weaker with time going by? I new that I had retained stuff because in addition to spotting my hpt, even if much weaker thsn before eprc, remained constant after initial decrease immiditaley after the eprc. One week is nothing, but if accompanied by still quite positive hpt which is not fading at all if you test with two 3-4 days apart, you may want to demand an US. I know doctors often fob you off and tell it can take weeks, but no - if it takes long and spotting continues, more often than not it is some small piece of placenta somewhere. Then they tell you that it comes out with next period, but it does not for some people and spotting goes on. Not to scare you, but keeping tabs on tests yourself helps to convince docs if you need to do it in the end!

My period was really period, and I am really on Cd 14 or thereabouts at least - pos opk for me today. So mc well and truly over, I think....mExpect another pos tomorrow, OV on Fri and then into LP. It took some 4 days of ewcm this time before LH started to go up, but still pretty good for wtf cycle. I did support it with soy, I have to confess, hoping to make sure cycle restarts the way I hope it will.....

Hello. I just wanted to say Thank You all for your kind words and support after my low point on Monday. My cat has been really ill and I was at the vets til last night so didn't get a chance to log on and thank you.

jassS I'm glad that you got your surge today and it looks like your cycle is getting back to normal
Gun I have my fingers crossed the boobs ARE a sign of a BFP this month. I am sure dragging myself back to the gym would also make me feel better so must try next week
fromwesttoeast I'm sorry to that the bleeding isn't letting up and hope the doctors keep a good eye on you

I haven't been doing tests actually! They told me to do a test in two weeks, so I was just going to do one on Sunday. If it's still positive then I am to call the hospital.

I would do one now, fromwest, and another then on Sunday, because if it is still pos but declining visibly, you are probably oK, if it is pos and remains stable you are not. Otherwise they may fob you off and say it can take longer and wait patiently, and nothing will be done. With weak positive that is what they do very often, I always have to remind that I have a history of retaining to get anybody take it seriously that I need and US.
But this is in Luxembourg, in Estonia you get a scan anyway, be the test pos or neg in two weeks. i have no idea how it works in UK of course. Procedures differ all over Europe of course

I think they said they will do a scan if it's still positive on Sunday. It's hard to remember exactly as I was still quite weak at that point, and was only focused on the words "you can go home"!

I hope that the bleeding stops soon for you fromwest.

My 'wtf' cycle seems to be getting a bit better. As I said on an earlier post, by temps really shot up around CD5/6/7 and when I started opks around CD9, they were coming up negative. I was absolutely convinced that I had ovulated really early. However, my temps then came back down again. Finally around CD14 I started to get positive opks, and had good strong ones on CD15 and CD16. My temp was up this morning (CD18) so I think I ovulated around CD16 or 17. We dtd on days 15 and 17. I'm a bit annoyed that we didn't manage to do it on CD16, as I would then really feel like we might have caught it. This is quite a late ovulation for me, and I'm wondering if it is to do with the many supplements that I have now been taking for about a month (DHEA, Q10, Vit D and E, and ProXeed). It will be interesting to see what day af shows up this time (as I totally expect that she will!!). Will it be a 2ww, or will I still have a 28 day cycle?? Who knows - watch this space!!

Lets hope Joey that no AF shows up in 2w time. 48 hour pause before dtd again is good for sperm quality, I would not at all worry about leaving day 16!
I also have pos opk today as well as I should do. Expect a neg tomorrow.

Well, here's an update, FWIW. Sunday morning (CD30) brought a BFN for me, but not much disappointment as I already 'knew' I wasn't pregnant, despite the late-ish AF. But my WTF cycle seemed determined not to give up on its WTF-ness, as bizarrely, I then had EWCM again. So I did an OPK for the hell of it, and got yet another positive. This was the fourth separate, positive OPK of the cycle (all OPKs were digital smiley face ones, so I had no doubt that they were indeed positive, for whatever reason).

Then Monday morning AF started. I made a mental list of reasons why I ought to be glad I hadn't got pregnant this time round. All varying degrees of trivial boll*cks of course. For instance:

1. I can get my hair re-coloured. I wouldn't dare dye my hair again if I was pregnant. Not after my freaky skin reaction at 16 weeks pg with DD - a bright red, burning scalp that lasted days, even after I'd washed it about 10 times in freezing cold water.
2. I needn't dread delivering at Christmas. That being the due date 'helpfully' calculated by FF (I wish it wouldn't do that) less the number of days that DD was early.
3. I can go to my routine dental check up tomorrow and book in for as many x-rays and route canals as may be required. Hmm ...

I was still thinking about the WTF cycle though. I'd put it down to maybe the Evening Primrose Oil, or else the Soy Isoflavones (CD5 - 9), or the DHEA (only 50mg daily, as squeezing in 3 x 25 mg seems quite beyond me).

Then I remembered (doh!) I'd had to increase my thyroid meds (I'm hypothyroid) 6 weeks ago. Maybe this had something to do with it? The whole process of changing the meds was a total saga (drove me nuts) and had meant we couldn't TTC in the month before the WTF cycle (which made the WTF extra infuriating). Fine tuning doses can be a bit of trial and error, and I think too much Thyroxine can mess up your cycles (anovulatory, infrequent AF, scant bleeding etc). So maybe it was that??? Anyway, my repeat thyroid blood tests were due today, so I guess I'll find out when the results come back.

But I think I've found the real culprit. With some trepidation, I went to a private clinic (a scanning service for fertility investigations + early pregnancy) on Tuesday, CD2, to get a new baseline antral follicle count and some blood tests. It seemed like a good idea.

FSH was OK (it was 5 - has usually been about 7 whenever I've checked this past year). Scan of left ovary showed its behaving pretty well for my age (6 antral follicles, given that at this juncture I'm pathetically grateful to have any). Then right ovary, hmm .... The scanning lady said, "if I didn't know differently, I'd say it looks like day 14 for an ovary stimulated by IVF medications ...". This sounded like a good thing until she explained that as well as a few antrals, there were three CYSTS (1 x 3cm and 2 x 2cm). Not 'big C' cysts - although I was in a total panic for a few seconds. But apparently it means I probably didn't ovulate last month (so I've fallen out with FF, which thinks I did) and I might not ovulate again until they've gone. The scan lady said they might well vanish on their own by next month ... but I couldn't help asking Dr Google, who came up with "1 to 3 months" before they'll go. Three months?!!! Plus I'm worried they'll need aspirating or something. I've never had cysts before and right now, I haven't got time for this nonsense!

Anyway, I'm going back for another scan next week (mid cycle) to see what's happening. Sincere apologies for the novella and the me, me, me post. But I am seriously f*ed off. It'll pass, no doubt.

Hoping everyone else has rather better news! And ...
Fromwest - hope the bleeding continues to subside and the test is negative.

Jass - sounds like your cycle is back to normal, are you trying this time?
Joey - fingers crossed for your 2ww. I conceived DD with a positive OPK on CD16, unusual at the time. Just saying.

Chewy, gosh you must have been confounded by that revelation. I hope your cysts bugger off by themselves so you can get back to ttc. Can I ask you what the purpose of antral follicle counts are, please? How much does one cost? How many follicles am I supposed to have?

Hello ladies. Sorry to hear about the cysts, chewy, hopefully next week's scan will give you better news.

So...I have to admit that I have actually been feeling fairly positive about things this month(don't know why, I mean,logically, I am a bit old). I felt we had good timing, I felt the super painful ovulation meant it was strong, and maybe the red clover isoflavones helped, and the terribly sore breasts, and the fact that they feel bigger,and also the feeling of being fatter,despite not changing diet or exercise routine...and the very vivid dreams of late, particularly recurring ones about being pregnant, I felt that maybe I'd have a good chance this month.

Anyway, I am 10 dpo, and although it is afternoon, and I'd only had a pee a couple of hours ago, I POAS and I have bfp. It's not dark, but I can actually see it and it has colour!

bloody hell I am happy! And really,really anxious.

But right now, I am grinning like a Chesire cat.

I have to go away on Sunday for Professional learning, in another town: I am going with a colleague, who is also a friend, and she's planning long evenings of wine and chatting. How on earth will I explain away that I can't drink? I really won't be telling a soul about the bfp for a while (if it lasts). what will I say? Perhaps I will suddenly have a UTI or some such thing and be on antibiotics?

I am not taking aspirin at the moment, should I? Is there anything else Should do to maybe sweeten my chances of hanging onto this pregnancy? II also haven't taken my supplements thefts couple of days. I think I'd better go and take some folic acid

Wow Gum that's fantastic! Congratulations. So happy for you. Keeping fingers and toes crossed for you that this works out. I see that you have been trying for 6 years. Have you had any bfps in this time?

Wow Gum, amazing news! We are having a run of BFPs on the thread.
Sorry no advice on things to do to help it stick (sorely in need of such advice myself) but willing you on for a sticky one.

Thanks joey and fromwest.

Joey, I have been pregnant 4 times in the last 5 years. The first two pregnancies ended around 9-10 weeks. I found out the first one was a trisomy 13, but don't know about the second. Since then I have had another pregnancy end around 6 weeks, and the last one was really a chemical, ending 4 +2. I really do believe the losses are due to chromo issues, which is directly related to my age. I hope this time, I have a healthy egg.

I am not even 4 weeks now, so I suppose there's a chance that this one could be chemical. I will just have to wait and see.

gum wow!! That is amazing news, congratulations!
Antibiotics are always a good excuse for not drinking Or say you've gone all healthy and given up alcohol, caffeine, sugar etc.? People do that all the time these days looking guiltily at my (very milky) coffee

The opinions on aspirin are very mixed - some recommend it, others advise against it. Did you ever discuss this with your GP/consultant? I am taking it, but that's on recommendation of my haematologist - I am actually not sure that I need it, as I am on heparin as well, but hey ho.

Gum, Huge congrats and if you want to do something which definitely can only help not harm then take progesterone supplements, if you have any. Were you on your isoflavones this cycle as well? I remember you were taking some last cycle, I think. They tend to retart feritlity at late 40ies, lots of stories on internet about how ppl used them to help with menopausal symptoms and suddenly fell pg. If 10 dpo afternoon you have a real pink line not a barely there one, it is not going to be chem! It is a steong start, so fingers crossed!
Fromwest and I did the mc part, we are now due 2 bfps to go to term not to fall below baseline statistics for pregnancies over 40:-)))
Not to scare any next bfps though - we deserve these babies for our perseverance, all of us! And I think we must have had a few more lately continuing successfully, as I seem to remember s few ladies come in and immidiately get bfp, then not come back. Probably went to term without worries and did not need the cruch of internet forums anymore.