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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

TTC for ten months, and the rest. Ten plussers welcome.

999 replies

MrsGingerbread · 08/02/2015 02:06

A friendly and welcoming thread full of lovely women.

OP posts:
loopylou1984 · 01/03/2015 08:43

Hi gingerbread - my bloods were done by my gp, but I have 'heard' others on here say the same as you. I think it depends on your area. Xx

Elektra83 · 01/03/2015 09:11

Hi All, can I join?

I had my day 21 blood test and the results were fine. Husband has his sperm analysis in a couple of weeks. I'm freaking out. He had testicular cancer about 10 years ago and only has one testicle. The gp said to me his treatment may have had an impact on his sperm sigh

As someone said earlier, so many of my friends are pregnant/had kids and I feel down. The really horrible thing is that my best friend is pregnant too (that bits great faod!) It's just horrible feeling bittersweet about it. She wants to talk about it all and I want to run away because we might not be able to have kids!

I'm a bad best friend I know...:-(

So for now I'm trying to keep busy and not freak out...failing a little as had a massive bawling fest last night (grey's anatomy triggered it!)
:-(

TrixieRay · 01/03/2015 09:12

My bloods were also done by my GP, he said everything was within normal range.
Got to have cuddles with a friends newborn yesterday, didn't want to give her back!

TrixieRay · 01/03/2015 11:40

Welcome Elektra, sorry you're having a tough time of it. It's so hard isn't it, my best friend got pregnant just before we started trying. I was convinced I'd be pregnant by the time her little one arrived, her maternity leave just ended and still not a hint of a BFP.
I really hope your DHs results are ok. A lady who got a BFP after 11 months has just started a thread with her story. Don't know how to post link but it's near the top of the page. Have a look!

Elektra83 · 01/03/2015 12:14

Thanks Trixie, I just read it :-D

I know what you mean re friends. One of my friends has just gone back to work after her maternity leave and I'm no closer to a baby.

My best friend and I were trying around the same time and that's been the hard part. Throw in some job stress for both me and the husband...its not been a great journey. I hope his results are ok or at least something that can be fixed/worked around.
The waiting around is frustrating too, I don't know how to distract myself!

loopylou1984 · 03/03/2015 21:37

Hi everyone, having a sad night tonight. Today marks my 16th af since we began ttc and just been baby bombed on fbook by friends who only got married 6 months ago. Why is this so hard for us?
It's getting to the point where we're going to have no friends left that we have anything in common with , I feel like a failure ??

BertieBoo10 · 03/03/2015 22:29

Sammy lou I'm on 18th this month so I know how you feel. You'll eventually find a couple (who may even have children) who struggled to like i did and it's such a wonderful support. We were so lucky they were old friends and we just happened to mention it having been a long time and the conversation just flowed. You always have us too. Just remember a lack of child doesn't define you, you're still female probably still like shopping, chocolate etc lol...you're so much more than a childless woman and you'll find ways of having something in common with people. Smile

Teagan007 · 04/03/2015 10:09

Hi again everyone.

Sorry I've been absent for a while, I've been busy packing ready to move into our first house! - This is a good thing to take my mind off babies.

TrixieRay, I've been taking 2 teaspoons of Manuka 20+ honey daily along with 25 almonds....and today marks the first day of my menstrual cycle.

Over the next day or two I will be waiting with baited breath to see if spending all this money on almonds and honey was worth it.

Elektra and sammylou, I too have the problem with friends and family around me falling pregnant. They don't know we've been struggling to conceive. About 18 months now I guess and my story goes that I had my daughter 3 years ago and conceived no problem. The frustrating question is why is it so hard this time round?? You just have to put on one of those temporary smiles and try to be happy for them....just change the subject when you get chance.

I'll keep you posted on whether the awful monthly cycle makes an appearance, diminishing all hope and rendering efforts of babymaking and body preparation useless.

One must keep positive though and that's the important thing! :-)

Teagan007 · 04/03/2015 10:43

I also forgot to mention that I had a random nosebleed on Saturday morning....of course I googled it and it could be a sign....then again, it may just be a nosebleed!

TrixieRay · 04/03/2015 11:10

Hi everyone,

I am expecting AF any time now and had the worst PMT yesterday - DH worked late and I wonder if he just wanted to avoid me, wouldn't blame him! I have been taking Maca which is supposed to balance hormones but maybe it has disrupted mine. Ended up blubbing but felt better afterwards.

Hope you are feeling better today Sammy. You are absolutely not a failure, you will get your BFP. I know it's hard but try and stay positive, just think how amazing it will be when it happens.
It must be hard when all of your friends have kids or are making announcements. There are a fair few on my facebook but out of my actual friends I see regularly only 3 have kids which is odd given that we are all aged between 31 and 36. I know one is trying so it is nice comparing notes with her though she is in the early days excited phase and I am in the OMG I have had enough of TTC phase.

Teagan, exciting about your first house! We moved into our house nearly two years ago and it is great settling in and making it your own. I have become a real home body.

Elektra, I so wanted to be pregnant at the same time as my best friend. It was really nice to be involved in her pregnancy but I found it hard at times.

Bertie, lovely post Smile almost got me blubbing again. Thanks for posting the HFEA link before, I'd not actually looked at it!

Have a work lunch today for a colleagues leaving do- an excuse to have a glass of wine at lunchtime Smile

loopylou1984 · 04/03/2015 16:24

Thank you both, I'm feeling a bit better today thanks (although your lovely posts did just make me cry again!), work was hard though.

I think my biggest worry is that if it turns out we can't have children, aside from being upset I won't know what to do with my life. My whole plan has always been to have a family and look after them.... I don't want to do anything else.

On a slightly more productive note, I want to make a list of things to ask the consultant when we go in April, but don't really know where to start... Any tips? Xx

loopylou1984 · 04/03/2015 17:24

Also, I've been on the HFEA website and our local clinic only has a four week waiting list for nhs patients! But I can't find anywhere about how long you have to have been trying before referral or how many god you get on the nhs.... Am I being silly? Xx

Teagan007 · 04/03/2015 21:18

Sammylou, regarding length of time TTC, I went to talk to the nurse at my GP and she started the process of a referral there and then. I told her we'd been trying for a year and she didn't ask any questions.

I had two blood tests before Christmas and another blood test (for Rubella????) late Jan. My husband did sperm count before Christmas (results are unknown as I guess these will be discussed at our referral). I only got my referral through a couple or three weeks ago for March 16th. No-one has explained to me what these tests are for and what my results were/are so I'm anxious for answers.

Trixie, hope you enjoyed your lunchtime wine! ;-) Wine

loopylou1984 · 04/03/2015 21:30

Thanks Teagan - I meant how long before you can have IVF rather than the original referral - sorry, I wasn't very clear.
You should be able to get a print out of your results from your doctors receptionist. When I got mine it showed the normal range next to the results for comparison.
I should think you had day 3 and 21 tests for hormone levels and to show ovulation. Xx

Teagan007 · 04/03/2015 22:09

Sorry! I'm new to this blog posting stuff so I may well have missed a cue! I did get the first lot of blood test results back and it was just a bunch of numbers with no explanation. I guess I feel a bit let down by my GP as I haven't even talked to him about it and I don't really want to in a way as I would rather talk to an expert (does that sound weird?).

Crikey, IVF...I had completely forgotten about this. I'm not sure how long you would have to wait sammylou. I don't think it would be an option for me being as I've already had a child. I was reading an article about this and how medical practitioners are writing ppl who struggle to conceive 2nd time round off as they say "you're lucky you have a child". But they forget that we still face the mental and emotional struggles. It's a complex situation.

The term"secondary infertility" was adorned to such women. Has anyone actually been told they are "infertile" as I am petrified of this word?

loopylou1984 · 04/03/2015 22:18

If you want to post your results is be happy to compare them to the scales on mine for you? Up to you. Smile

Not been diagnosed yet, but I'm also terrified of the word infertile. Xx

Teagan007 · 05/03/2015 09:15

Well, in the middle of the night, I started my usual monthly agony, and this morning I suffer.

Another month without any luck!

£20 worth of honey (enjoyed) but down the drain and an extra couple of lbs of almonds on my hips...all in the name of trying.

We'll just have to see what the specialists say next Monday.

TrixieRay · 05/03/2015 13:46

I did Teagan Smile my boss always orders the nicest wine! Sorry AF arrived, good that you have your appointment soon though, that is a quick referral. My GP referred me last Monday and I've still not had an appointment through. Will chase it up I nothing by the end of the week.

I fear DH and I will be labelled with 'unexplained infertility' don't buy it though - my eggs are fine, DH sperm is fine so it will happen somehow.

How is everyone else doing?

loopylou1984 · 05/03/2015 14:36

Teagan sorry af is here Hmm

I'm doing much better today, knew I would as soon as hormones levelled out.

My initial appointment took ages to come through, nearly 8weeks before I got the letter, for an appointment 4 days later!

I can't wait for our next appointment now, I just want to get on with things! Xx

TrixieRay · 08/03/2015 16:46

On to cycle 16 here.
Reassuring to hear that your appointment took a while to come through Sammy. I'll hold on a little bit longer.

loopylou1984 · 08/03/2015 19:03

Rrr Trixie, sorry af arrived. Xx

loopylou1984 · 09/03/2015 21:14

Yes, hold on Trixie. It kind of feels better knowing that my appointment is next month. I oy have to get through one more cycle before it happens. Xx

Ronnie85 · 10/03/2015 10:34

Hi ladies

Hope you don’t mind me joining in. We’ve been TTC for 10 months. My cycle is usually between 30 – 32 days. I used a CB digital OPK in Feb, which said I ovulated on 22nd Feb. AF should have arrived on Friday (6th March) but as yet, no sign of her. So as of today I’m 4 days late and I’m on CD36. I did a test on Saturday afternoon and another on Sunday morning, they were cheap Asda tests, both glaring BFNs. I’ve not tested since as I’m too scared of another BFN. I’ve not had any really notable symptoms – noticed a bit of bloating last night and some mild cramps/twinges over the past few days but nothing major.

Is anyone in a similar boat? I’m so desperate to test again but I don’t want to face the disappointment of another BFN just yet. I think I would rather see AF than a BFN ?

xx

loopylou1984 · 11/03/2015 06:54

Hi Ronnie, any news?
I had one random cycle that lasted 43 days, and I was convinced I was pg despite bfns. I wasn't. I think I probably didn't ovulate that cycle, which could be what's happened for you... Unless you've been temping to prove it happened?
Fx though you are one of the ladies who doesn't get a bfp till a week after af due. Xx

Ronnie85 · 11/03/2015 09:14

Hi Sammylou

I caved and tested last night as I had one left. It was BFN as expected so I definitely don’t think I’m pregnant but still no sign of AF (5 days late now) and symptoms still exactly the same – just some really mild cramping/twinges off and on and feeling quite bloated.

I don’t temp but I did use a clear blue digital OPK for the first time in Feb. I went through the 3 stages so a sad face for low fertility the first day I tested, then a flashing smiley for a few days for high fertility and then finally a solid smiley for peak fertility – so according to that I ovulated exactly when I thought I should on 22nd Feb. I don’t know how accurate or reliable they are but I’m not sure I’d have got a solid smiley for peak fertility if I hadn’t ovulated?? I think it would have just stayed on the flashing smiley. I’m really confused. I haven’t been on the pill for a good 3-4 years and have never missed a period in all that time but I suppose it wasn’t thinking about it as much as I am now. I just want to know either way!