Don't risk sending piss by post. Get your BFP the JS way! Slip on your disco pants, pet the full moon unicorn, and get jizzy in all the right places (just not the carpet). It's Just Shaggin' Part 25!

[Redshoes56]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

The link to Part 24 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/a2078980-Come-one-come-all-the-Jason-Doner-Van-is-open-for-business-Don-your-disco-pants-brandish-your-rim-brush-and-get-on-it-Its-Just-Shagging-part-24-Can-we-beat-23s-BFP-hat-trick-flange-wankers?" target="_blank">here</a> 

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2100803-Just-Shagging-Grads-Thread-9-Roll-Up-Roll-Up-all-you-graduated-Viroids" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

Happy shagging, shaggers!

hi all, hi to newbies and commiserations to all those visited by the witch. She's due to haunt these 'ere parts next weekend. I feel PMT-tastic so v much doubt I'm upduffed this month. Is that pessimistic-symptom-spotting? Do I need an anti-hooya?

I got pissed about this month too.
Can I have a tampon charm too please
I'm on day 9 and about to go away with work for 3/4 nights...unhelpful timing. Don't they know I'm TTC

I was really crampy yesterday and now nothing. If ERTD is due I wish it'd flimming well get on with it!

Everyone* I know is either pregnant or has just had a baby. Three this weekend alone - something in the water I reckon. DD is so in love with my friend's new baby that she can't even move for excitement. I don't really mind if I'm not pregnant this month as I can't see how we'd have managed it but I just want to know one way or the other.

Tampon charms for everyone!

*slight exaggeration. But only slight.

Hey all, sorry to all that the witch has visited, seems like a lot over the weekend, I hope you all enjoyed your

I feel a bit guilty saying this, but Sunday, 6 days after the witch was due but with no show I finally decided to POAS and, yep, it was positive. I'm up the duff. Hubby has said nothing but 'oh, that's a bit serious' since. I think he might be broken.

Good luck to all the twotters.

congrats butterpuff! don't feel guilty! hope ur dh absorbs the news soon!! bless him.

commander 3 in one weekend?! everyone doesn't sound that much of an exaggeration then!!

Aww butter congratulations!! Why the heck would you feel guilty? That's lovely!

Did you get any bfns before the bfp? Stats please to give us hope!

POAS this morning - bfn. I'm sure I'm not pg as it's 3 weeks now since I last dtd and surely it would show by now? Cd37, what's with the long frigging cycles witch!? STOP BEING MEAN! Phew, that feels better.

Looking forward to her finally arriving so I can play with ultimate contraband. Naughty!

Happy Monday shaggers!

Can totally sympathise with the babies everywhere non exaggeration. 25 of my friends gave north one year.

Woohoo congrats butterpuff!

Commander that's a hefty weekend, I've only got SiL to contend with fortunately

*birth not north!

Oh and for those feeling devoid of symptom spotting - tingly boobs, pains come and go in womb (twangy womb syndrome?), tired but potentially due to wedding dancing, no grumpiness normally associated with af.

Thanks lil and la

My first test was at 6 days late, so cant say if an earlier test would have been positive or negative. I was actually so convinced before the witch was due that I didn't feel the need to bother testing. Just figured this weekend that I should confirm. (as I really wanted a glass of wine so had to have proof before I left it in the bottle!)

But on the symptom side. Sore boobs from mid cycle till now and serious lower back pain from two days before the witch was due. Still have lower back and hip/pelvic pain (but suffer from nasty joints/possible ME anyway so to be expected). Going to call the nurse later as I figure I should do something!

First time for me (third cycle trying so I'm very lucky) but I'm clueless, and very

butterpuff 3cycles? when did u join the thread? gave u done a kitten?

have not gave!

ohhh butterpuff congratulations, thats lovely news, really dont feel guilty, its nice to get bfps, it gives the rest of us hope.

Still no witch, she only messed me about last month by coming a day early, this time she's late with no signs of arriving. I think she might soon though, I've dried up a little down there, iyswim, but not sure if that's because I'm knicker watching!

Going to see a medium tomorrow so maybe I shall find out something there. Hopefully. Keep trying to read my own tarot cards but I am seriously getting scared with them now, 3 of swords, the devil, not liking my chances right now esp as I am desperate to pull out the empress but I haven't once, not even for dp!!!

just wasted an hour of my life reading aibu!

babble I haven't read tarot cards for years. did it a bit when I was a teen. fx you get that empress!

Yep, may have done a kitten, joined earlier this month.

babble hope your going to tell us what the medium says. I've only ever seen one, at my grad ball and I think she may have been a fake. Fascinated, but sceptical, keep looking at tarot but never find the time to learn how to use them. I have used tea leaves a few times before, but don't really trust my readings. All fun though.

I love AIBU! It's amazingly addictive! Have you seen the one from someone who wants to kill their neighbours tree??

Hello - congratulations Butter!

I'm in desperate need of a nailbrush, a clean loo and a hot shower!

Symptom spotting fun - sore boobs, womby twinges, RAGE .... Almost certainly PMT unfortunately

Hello - congratulations Butter!

I'm in desperate need of a nailbrush, a clean loo and a hot shower!

Symptom spotting fun - sore boobs, womby twinges, RAGE .... Almost certainly PMT unfortunately

lala Oh goodness, I think my Mum might be one here...someone wants to kill there neighbours tree.......my folks have been known to try this before

pisghetti thanks, and enjoy that shower.

Haha, what is it about bloody aibu!?

Massive congrats Butter xx

Congrats Butter! It often takes the menfolk a few days to come round to the idea.

Our neighbours hate our trees, maybe it's them. I also hate them though so wouldn't mind if they killed them.

Lala It sounds like you're stopping getting the cape on too early with these long cycles? I guess ultimate contraband will help you figure it out.

Congratulations Butterpuff

Thanks all.

Haha AIBU is funny :)

Congrats butter puff, and happy Monday shaggers, why isn't it Friday already?!

Congrats butter! Brill news x

Congrats butter wonderful news.

pis are you clean yet?