Don't risk sending piss by post. Get your BFP the JS way! Slip on your disco pants, pet the full moon unicorn, and get jizzy in all the right places (just not the carpet). It's Just Shaggin' Part 25!

[Redshoes56]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

The link to Part 24 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/a2078980-Come-one-come-all-the-Jason-Doner-Van-is-open-for-business-Don-your-disco-pants-brandish-your-rim-brush-and-get-on-it-Its-Just-Shagging-part-24-Can-we-beat-23s-BFP-hat-trick-flange-wankers?" target="_blank">here</a> 

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2100803-Just-Shagging-Grads-Thread-9-Roll-Up-Roll-Up-all-you-graduated-Viroids" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

Happy shagging, shaggers!

That's brilliant Gaggia. My wee one got stuck in a chair the other day. Thought i was going to have to call the firemen any excuse. I was also useless and someone else got her free. At least we'll have good stories to tell them when they're older

Morning viroids!

purple hang on in there!

Fx for the twotters. I'm due af this week - I don't feel pg and screwed up everything this cycle so very much doubt I'm getting bfp :(

Girl at work who got married 5 months after me just announced she's pg. happy for her but frustrated for me.

Went to London and theatre yesterday with my mum. Brilliant day ! What are you all up to?

Have a good day x

gaggia oh dear that sounds traumatic! Glad she's ok x

red I was bartender for years - if you're out it's easy enough to get bartender to make drink look like alcohol, but you're right it's much harder at house party. Come clean

Morning viroids!

My sister is in the birthing pool pushing as we speak. So I will mostly be being a first time aunty today.
Washing needs hanging out too.

Morning all. Exciting day for you gaggiagirl (amusingly my phone tried to autocorrect this to haggis girl )

Today I shall mostly be trying to pack the car to go on holiday tomorrow with the help of an almost 4yo. DH out. Could take some time....

Congratulations on becoming an auntie Gaggia.

Hang in there Lala . What did you see at the theatre?

This weekend I'll mostly be TTC (with some cheese and wine partying tonight - girls and guys gotta refuel)

Congrats gaggia! Have fun on your holiday Could!

We've got family round for fIL's birthday, going out for a meal then have the nieces staying tonight, it'll be ace :)

I'm spending the day with the girls, just took them strawberry picking. Due AF tomorrow so thinking happy thoughts

Afternoon viroids. Still no witch. Been away and didn't take sticks with me, got 2 packs of FRER on way home.
I'm 2 days late at the mo, trying not to symptom spot. I'm 90% sure I'm not and drank a bit yesterday but not loads. It would have been tres suspicious if I'd not drank. At the Christmas party half the company asked me if we wanted kids

Have you peed on the frer yet???

Pee on the frer!

PEEEE purple! Do it. Do it. Good old fashioned peer pressure, here.

pis that sounds like a hell of a good weekend you have planned!

Congrats gaggia -- and fingers crossed wedding.

Hi babble -- yep it is me knocked up through love and science

I don't miss wine at all, oddly. I am starting to get fed up though with the rules about what I can't eat. I am going to buy some pasteurized brie this week and bake it, eat it and not feel guilty about it. Hmph.

Anxious beyond belief for scan on Monday. I feel normal. I almost wish I had horrible morning sickness or something because then I'd know I was definitely still pregnant. I'm sure I'll regret making that wish.

lala we are thinking of going to one of our favorite restaurants next week and I'm definitely going to ask the bartender to whip me up something fun so that I am not as envious of DH's many gin and tonics!

red

just caught up with your news - Congratulations on being pg, so happy for you!

gaggia
is that really you, from our pub?
how are you? are you TTC-ing?

I'm going to pee on the FRER in the morning
I've drunk loads today so my pee is diluted

Thank you, zing! We're over the moon but still anxious as it's pretty early. Not ready for grad fred yet, nope....

But that is the beauty of the frer Purple ... no fmu required #badinfluence

Ohhh I didn't know that!

Peeeeeeeee

BFFN
Off to find wine

Aaah rubbish, sorry bird Hope the convertible gets its act together soon, waiting is the worst!

Oh bad luck Purple It's not over til the witch pulls in though, fx for you!
BFFN - typo, or Big Fat Fucking No?

Don't be superstitious about the grads Fred Red We're all a bunch of nervous wrecks over there too! Good luck for the scan on Monday And definitely don't wish sickness on yourself!! lol, I'm sooo glad mine has finally gone! xx