Karma's a load of old shite! The BESH have gone through a fair old heap of bollocks lately so it's time we had some good news!

[Fabuluce]

In order to join the BESH you MUST be over 30 and TTC for baybee no. 1 for over a year, be ok with swearing, shout CUNT at the world on a daily basis and howling at the moon should be a regular occurrence. BESHtionnaires must be submitted - no admittance allowed without it (we just want to snigger at your lesbian crush - it's true).

Revised BESHtionnare for reference

1. Do you like gin? (This is compulsory, you must say 'Yes')
   
   
2. Men - are you a gold digger or a cradle snatching cougar?
   
   
3. Baybee-making - to put a baybee in your tumtum, which hole do you use:
   a) weewee
   b) poopoo
   c) foofoo
   d) none, you just pray to the baby Jebus.
   
   
4. Testing - when someone wonders if they should test for updiff (pg), do you:
   a) bellow 'POAS!' at them non-stop and punch them repeatedly in the kidneys till they wet themselves anyway.
   b) Sprinkle them with babydust and send them hugs and kisses on lickle baby angel wings.
   
   
5. Is R2D2:
   a) an adorable robot from Star Wars.
   b) the source of all evil.
   
   
6. Number of pets?
   
   
7. Inappropriate (read: weird) crush of shame?
   
   
8. Lesbian crush?
   
   
9. How much money have you spent on sticks you then urinate on?
   a) Oh nothing, I'll probably catch first time and then get the doctor to confirm it.
   b) Over 100 quid
   c) I opened an account on ebay solely for the purpose of purchasing sticks
   
10. Which of these sentences is appalling:
    a) Off to see the consultant today!!! So excited!!!!!
    b) Gud luck hun sprinkling babydust for ya lol xxx
    c) both of the above
    
11. How barren are you?
    a) childless and TTC for at least one year
    b) one child and TTC #2 for at least two years
    c) I've been trying for 2 cycles and the wait is driving me mad!
    
    If (c) then the BESH is not the thread for you.

[Fabuluce]

Oh bless her, that's a lot to be going through for such a young'un.

Yes you're absolutely right - he's still unhappy about it but he should have just got it sorted in the first place IMHO. I left him to crack on with it, didn't moan or bag and nothing happened. So here I am, sorting it out, quel surprise. Not that I want to think about the next time we move but next time....!!

[MissHobart]

Thanks hags, just told BR, he's happy cos he doesn't have to jizz with cup We both have everything crossed make through at least the next week!

Fankle - not ivf, but still need a toe hold!

Bugs - Lots of luff to the woofie, take it easy!

[MissHobart]

Dishes - I hope you're feeling ok,.I'm really glad the EPU is referring you direct, I think you've paid more than your dues!

Fab - if I ever left any simple important jobs like that to BR it'd never Get done so I feel your pain!

[Fabuluce]

Yes Dish I'm glad you've been referred - you will have a sense if relief that they are finally going to look into it all I'm sure.

Fanks I'm rather jell of your sewing machine (aside from the fact that it is pink as it's my most hated colour I'm afraid). I want to be able to make cushion covers and curtains!

[MissHobart]

Fanks - I love my sewing machine! I only make easy stuff though, currently starting on dribble bibs for the various babies that seem to be surrounding me. Cushion covers are great to make too though BR doesn't allow must of my favorite fabrics!

More menkul, starting to feel cramps, hate this

[FizzyFeet]

Hang on in there, Miss H. You know as well as I do that cramps can be a good sign as well as a not good sign. And that's a really strong positive you've got there!


dishy good news about the referral. How are you doing today?

Little news here- still taking the progynova and have added in some patches. Currently sporting one on my bum - sexy! Really hoping this will do the trick (along with exercise, high protein diet, pomegranate juice, brazil nuts and a big vial of snake oil).

[Fabuluce]

Blimey Fizz you really are doing it all - that surely MUST work now?

[cherrycoconut]

Fucking hell Miss H that's awesome news! Mackrel of menkulling for you alright. Hoping like mad it's a sticky one for you.

Oi Fizz an HRT patch on the cheek is the new sexy, don'tcha know? I am also sporting the latest, must have, derrière accessory. Sounds like you're throwing everything at it you can. Come ooooon the lining!

Sorry to hear your pup's been so poorly Bugs. Your poor animals and bank balance have really had it hard this last few weeks. Bad times.

Yay for the referral cletter and here's to some positive news for you in the next little while. God knows you deserve some.

Fab yours and my hubbies sound like they're from the same mould. If you want anything done, sort it yourself. I love him dearly but if it was up to him we would never do anything!

[cletterthedishes]

Evening hags - yeah, I'm glad about the investigations just because if there's something simple I can do, that would be great. And even if they just tell me my innards are the right shape and I have functioning ovaries, that's a couple thing less to think about.

But I'm also menkulling over the (tiny) chance that the solution might involve injecting myself . I can't imagine being able to stick a needle in myself once, let alone every day. TBH it freaks me out when someone else has to do it, once in a blue moon. I juts hope to God it's not autoimmune disorder . . .

[eurochick]

cletter I'm glad you got the referral. How are you feeling? I think I was tired and a bit numb by this point.

If it comes to it, the injecting really is fine. Promise.

bugs hurrah for pet insurance. I hope the pup gets a good prognosis.

missh a BFP! Awesome. And that is a nice strong line.

fizz & cherry have you considered sticking a mr bump plaster on the other cheek to complete the look?

fab KFZK is a procrastinator too. I could kill him sometimes. Did I mention on here the holiday debacle? He was supposed to book it (I didn't have the readily available cash as I had paid for the independent midwife). By the time he got around to it, it had gone up LOADS and there was hardly anything else available. So we bit the bullet and paid the extra, but I could have fecking killed him.

[MissHobart]

Dishes - I had heparin injections after surgery a few years ago, I did them once a day for just over a week I think, tiny needles into my tummy fat, could hardly feel them, you'll be fine if you need them!

[cherrycoconut]

I'm especially cross only because this week has seen another fail for me on the HRT front, I'm so disappointed with the GP's! I neeed to change one of my patches (oestrogen/progesterone combi) which I take for 12 days. The one that reaaaally irritates my skin. I'd done loads of research before I went and knew the option I wanted to try - but despite the GP calling in another for a second opinion they still bottled the decision and would only re prescribe the same damn one. So, itchy ass it is for 2 weeks out of 4 for the foreseeable. I am livid.

Luckily my soul was saved by the warmth of human kindness that shone out of the lovely pharmacist - I went in with my muddle of prescriptions and ended up explaining the whole sorry saga to him. He's spent his morning ringing round drug companies to find out whether the glue composition is any different if the product is made by a different pharmacy - sadly not which doesn't save my ass, but what a love for trying!

Roll on fricking July and my specialist appt. Ppfft.

[cletterthedishes]

Thanks everyone that's reassuring about the teeny tiny needles. I had a proper phobia of injections when I was younger, which I'm working on and is much less intense now. They still make me nervous though! It's ridiculous really, because whatever pain the injections cause will be about 0.1% as bad as my 3rd MC, which I did without pain relief (couldn't keep anything down).

euro, I'm starting to wobble a bit. I'm stuck in a bind with my job. In my line of work it's virtually impossible to get employment with anyone else, and if you do it's as a self-employed subcontractor with no security, and you have to work like a dog for crap money. The best thing to do is be independent and self-employed. But I can't build a client base when I might have to drop everything at 6 months' notice, because I get a BFP. And to be honest I don't want to work at all during my pregnancy, if I can help it. It's a hard physical job with dangerous elements including working at height, heavy lifting & solvents, and I just can't take the mental strain of maybe losing another pregnancy and wondering if it was something I did.

So I've hardly worked at all over the last six months. It's not a problem financially, Mr C is more than capable of supporting us both and really doesn't mind (that's why I'm a golddigger, obvs ) but it eats away at me sometimes. It's OK when I'm pregnant, because we're going somewhere, something's happening, I've got a purpose. But when I'm not I just feel lost and pointless. I've got no identity, nothing to feel good about. Of course there's lots of stuff really, but I struggle not to think of myself as a failure because I don't have a 'proper' job (I've got three degrees, for fuck's sake. Three.). I can't help comparing myself with all the women we know who have lovely, high-paid office jobs with people they like, and who go back part-time after having kids. And then there's me. No income, no security, haven't even worked enough to get maternity allowance now (would have got it, just, if this one had worked out, but no way by the next one). No chance of going back part-time after kids.

I know being able to not work is a position lots of women would love to be in, but it's only OK when you choose it. And I've put a lot of emphasis on achievement in the past, so it's hard for me to feel OK about myself when nothing I do is considered important by most people. Yes, I'm making a home, doing shitloads of work on the house and saving us lots of money, but everyone still asks what I 'do'.

So there's my wobble. Sorry for the essay hags

cherry, your pharmacist sounds lovely. It can really cheer you up when you meet a properly nice person

[Fankletastic]

Oh Dishy. I can relate to the bit about having a purpose. You feel when you're pregnant that you're moving on to the next stage of your life. And it's exciting even if scary. You think about winding down your career for a while...scary for some but wonderful for others. Personally I so looked forward to maternity leave and even thought of quitting my job and taking a couple of years out as fortunately MG can support us financially himself.
But when it is snatched away, so too are all your plans and hopes. And it's back to living in limbo. That's really the worst thing for me- living in limbo for years, not knowing if it will ever change.

But there must be hope. And if there isn't that right now (some days you don't even want to hope) then there is solidarity with us lot.

[cletterthedishes]

Thanks Fankle. It means a lot that I can talk to people fellow hags on here. I really do appreciate it. It's just lonely being in this position, and it helps that other people know what it's like.

I am a bit teary today and this is bringing it on again - but in a nice way

[Fankletastic]

I'm not surprised you're teary after the last few days you've had.

[Fankletastic]

Balls to it- I'm laying out a cheese platter 'n all. Feeling generous

[cletterthedishes]

The GIN! Thank GOD!

cheeseboard . . . mmmm

[cletterthedishes]

a toast to the new ESHlet!

[MissHobart]

Yay for another win!

I've bitten the most massive bullet today, woo needles went well, knicker twitch continues, nothing to report on that front, booked to see GP on the 10th either way, wedged myself into see the midwife on the 15th Hoping for an early scan, I can always cancel that one. Terrifying!

[Fabuluce]

Wow Miss - well done you

Yay for Sinks - hope everything is ok with her tum tum after the sunroof exposure.