Eggcellent egg buddies - a thread for all those IVFing in January, February and March - Volume 2

[resipsa]

Hi all. As promised, a sparkling new thread that is going to see a lot of action in the next few weeks, I hope!

I know bugs, but I already just know!
Wouldn't a sensitive test show earlier? Ds was positive by 10dpo.

I think I need to just accept that's it.

E lurking to say 10dpo is VERY different to 7 or 8dpo! Don't give up just yet One x

And all pregnancies will have differing levels of hgc as well. I am now 19 days past EC and I've only just got a proper line on an Internet cheapie test yesterday.

Don't give up yet!!

AFM - I am soooooo bloated its ridiculous! I was at least 15 weeks pregnant before I started to show with my DS and I look huge already. Am not exaggerating. None of my jeans or trousers fit. Anyone else experienced this? I will be 5 weeks on Monday.

I'm at 8dpo.
But I used an early response that shows from 6 days before your period. I would be due next Friday. It was negative. Well there was the ghost of a line but I think it was an evap or the very very dry end of the trigger and I could only see it when under the light!

Also I've lot weight, I'm in my skinny jeans and they are loose. Usually this would be good news...at the moment not so much. I told my mom today it had failed and despite her going on about Ivf being unnatural she was disappointed. I'm her only child and it looks like ds will be her only grandchild.

I think even with a first response on 8dpo you could easily get a single line even if you are pregnant. I know how you feel tho. The evil second week of the 2ww! And when you feel things didn't go as well as they should have. I really hope you get a big surprise in a few days time. X

Thanks stars x x

I think it's about 50:50 for getting a line at 8dpo on an early response but I feel like I'm just kidding myself. The more likely explanation is my 6 cell embie stopped dividing probably the same day it was implanted. All this waiting for something that's already too late! I wish it was possible to find out the day after transfer. Then I could pack in the progesterone.

Sorry not same day it was implanted - same day it was transferred.
Poor little embie.

I'm the same bad. I was "fat" from about 5 weeks. I'm now a right chubber. But I don't have a proper bump shape, just a load of bloat.

One, no fat ladies (on this thread or elsewhere) have sung yet. You're not out.

Thanks for letting me know Euro. I look about 15 weeks pregnant. My DP is convinced its because there are twins in there. It's just bloat though! How are you feeling? You must be almost 12 weeks now? Exciting!!

Just been out with friends for the evening. I think it was too soon, have spent the evening on the verge of tears. I think it's because I feel like for me everything has changed and none of them even have any idea. It weighs on my shoulders all the time. It's so incredibly isolating.

Bugs - you see, sage advice on here!

Hope you bought more than 1!!!

One - you have my sympathy. I know how that feels. Sorry. Hope you feel better tomorrow.

Bugs - great news!

One - I really think you ought to tell one if your friends what you are going through. You need support at a time like this and it definitely sounds like you aren't getting enough. My best friend has been great - we haven't chatted about it loads, but have been in text contact. She is always asking me how I'm doing, and if I've been fed up or upset, I've been able to unload. I know it can feel like everyone is pregnant, but even those friends would be supportive, I'm sure. I wasn't prepared for how all consuming IVF would be, and it's true, you feel totally isolated. Thinking of you xxx

One. You really should tell people. Everyone I know knows pretty much. Even the couple we bought our house from! If people talk about it it will stop ttcing being a taboo.

Bugs, looking good woohoo!

One, sorry your night out left you feeling worse than ever I do think it's a good idea to tell one of your friends. If they're good friends they'll try and support you. I know they don't always 'get it' but being able to just say why you're feeling so crap is a relief in itself. I agree that ivf is so isolating though. That's why groups like this are so invaluable. I am still in a state of feeling very sorry for myself that Ivf is a massive part of my life and more than that, failed ivf. I feel very angry at everything right now and so so jealous of anyone with more than one child. I don't understand myself, as I didn't feel that way about people with children before I had DS. I hope you see a second line soon xx

De lurking to give one a huge hug. I kept IVF quite for the first few months but people kept becoming arsey with me for being flakey/turning down social invites. For me it was infinitely easier to let everyone know, including work. I feel incredibly luck as work have been very supportive, I knew my friends would be. That said, those who haven't been through any of this don't get it and do still come out with stupid comments but I found so many people who have also been through this or are going through it and are relieved to have someone to talk to too. I'd love to say feeling shit passes and it does. It also comes back and hits you like a ton of bricks but we are all here for you xx

Bugs - hurrah! Tentative congratulations x x

Thanks everyone. I feel awful at the moment and I'm not sure why because I never expected it to work. Actually that is why I feel awful; because I have this absolute feeling of certainty that we won't have another child I don't even feel like I have any hope. We are fortunate in that we could afford several more cycles but it doesn't make me feel any better because I don't think any of them would work.
Part of the reason I haven't told my friends is because most of them are pregnant or have very small babies. I don't want to make them feel awkward or feel like they can't invite me places or can't talk about things that are happening for them. It's not their fault they're fertile and we are not. And I do seem to have very very fertile friends!

I had Pnd after having ds and didn't really appreciate his tiny months. I feel like that's why I can't have another child, I wasn't grateful enough for my first one. I know this is stupid. A parent I am working with at the moment has had four children removed for abuse and is pregnant again. So I know it doesn't work on who is the most deserving gets a baby but I still feel like it's my fault we can't have another.

9dpo, (6dp3dt) bfn.

That's where I am bugs.
It might be hormonal too like you say. It feels like terrible pmt. dh better watch out, I'm homicidal on a normal month! He may have to move out for a few days for his own safety.

Agh One - as Bugs says, 9dpo is WAY too early! I bet even Octomom didn't get her BFP that early.

Even though your friends are pregnant, or have young children, I still think you should confide in a couple of them. Those with children get it more than those who don't have kids, anyway. The most insensitive comment I have ever had was upon telling one of my best male friends, who is gay, that I was now technically infertile and would have to do IVF. He told me there were too many children in the world anyway and that i 'should be grateful' I already had one. Pregnant ladies or mums might not fully 'get it' but they will still be able to empathise and offer support. And try not to blame yourself! I know its easy to say - I thought it was 'my fault' I lost my tubes to ectopics because of waiting until I was over 35. And when I found out I was pregnant with the first ectopic, I was a bit annoyed at the inconvenience because we were due to fly to Australia. We always try to blame ourselves, but there's no point. Shit things happen to everybody. But there is no point torturing yourself - yet! - because you still don't know it hasn't worked! And if it doesn't, remember you have the option to explore other avenues. Chin up, One!

bad I hit 12 weeks on Thursday. 12 week scan will be on Monday week at 12+4. If all is well then, I have promised myself I will chill the fuck out.

Re: the bloat, the arse bullets don't help I think, but I've heard of natural differs suffering too. I've been told that it tend to go later on, and you get "sllimmer" before the real bump appears. I think that might just be happening to me now. (TMI alert) I spent yesterday emitting the most toxic farts and am a lot less bloated today than I have been in ages. The nausea seems to have gone too. I'm trying to see this is a good thing and not menkul about loss of symptoms.

one I'm sorry your night out left you feeling bad. Like some of the others, I have found talking about it openly helps. Not everyone will say the right thing, but I have had some great support, even from some instadiffers.

Your PND has no effect on anything. If there was a deserving element to any of this, would anyone have more than one child with foetal alcohol syndrome? Would the absolutely lovely poster on another thread I am on have lost her IVF baby at 12 hrs old? There is no logic or karma or anything like that in any of this.

Please wait a couple of days before testing again. You are just torturing yourself with these early tests. x