Um hello, newbie, ttc, needing a place to talk to people :)

[Fruityb]

I've been reading the site for ages but decided to sign up as need an outlet and place to talk as ttc is quite secret and it's not something I have loads of people I could talk about it with. Plus I'm quite shy and my ovaries aren't something to bring up at social gatherings!
I'm 31, came off pill in October and me and boyfriend have been ttc since. I didn't know how long it would take to get back to normal as had been on pill for eleven years. Turns out it took four weeks, and am now on third AF since coming off, so annoyingly normal in one way! I'm getting my head round all this tracking stuff but don't want it all to get clinical with the fella as it takes the fun away!
So just wanted to say hi and hopefully share in people's stories. It's not all as straightforward as I always thought, and I'm always the one that would start panicking something was wrong with me. I'm pleased I found somewhere I can just write it down if nothing else.
So, hi, and hopefully can take some good advice away.

At least it was only 40 minutes this time Gennz... just wait until it's 24/7 I keep getting told when it's your own you just 'know what to do'.

I really hope so after my dream, where the hospital tried to send me home having given birth and I refused to leave, practically tying myself to the bed, because I didn't know how to change a nappy or feed my baby Woke up in a bit of a cold sweat!

I'm supposed to be trying to get my assignments written this morning, I am studying part time for a degree, but since my news yesterday I'm finding it really hard to care about the history of Christianity. I'd much rather be adding baby things into my Amazon wish list or being on here :) Also I really don't think it's going to be that practical once baby arrives to keep studying. Would love to be a SAHM but I think in reality I'm going to have to go back to work or tone down my expensive taste for Cath Kidston Kids and Joules things

Ouch Kiki, that does not sound remotely fun for you at all. Do you have any idea how long morning sickness is supposed to last for? A girl at my work had one of those travel sickness wrist band things on to try and help with her morning sickness. Might not work but could be worth a shot? I think I would feel ridiculously worried all the time as well so don't blame you for that. Hopefully it'll get easier as you start to get a bump and feel the baby moving around as well. Fingers crossed :)

Kiki and Binky- the randomly bursting in to tears doesn't sound particularly fun either!

Gennz- had to laugh at that story. As much as you think you know it's going to be hard, I don't think anyone can be totally prepared for the reality of having their first child and going through that all day every day!!

Binky- good luck with your assignments, must be really hard to find the motivation to do stuff like that when you have a child!

I'm in the TWW now. Dtd 7 times so far since cd6 and BFP is due 14th feb ish, so keep everything crossed for me! Feeling better about our chances this month because my body seems to be a lot more normal, compared to last month when I had all sorts of weird things going on!!

Misskgb- when's your BFP due?

Af due weds so if she's not arrived on fri I'll give poas a go then. Can't decide if I feel any different yet. This is cycle 3 since coming off the pill but first time timing dtd around ov & tww. I think I've done all the right things including no alcohol so fx but not getting hopes up just yet!!

Morning sickness usually clears up after the first trimester. I think it's usually at it's worst around 8 weeks, they say. That was my experience last time as well, all gone by around 13 weeks.

I don't know why they call it morning sickness. I'm ok in the morning, get worse all day, and at 8pm I go to bed feeling awful.

I find exercise and cold water the only things that help. Fresh air. A lie down. NOT your baby feeding you partly chewed bits of toast, that's not helpful at all.

The tiredness can be extraordinary, like you're DYING. It was worse last time for me, I am tired, but it's bearable. This also passes. Hang in there Kiki.

I drank half a glass of wine last night. My brother opened this special bottle for me and I didn't know how to say no. Oops. Oh well. I think the pregnancy "rules" are a bit ridiculous, anyway. But I still feel very guilty! It's probably the hormones!

Gennz I'm loving your babysitting story! I'm not sure you do know what to do with your own baby, but you muddle through

kiki have you found the little "week by week" pictures of your baby growing, I used to really like looking at those, reminding me why I was doing it all and how amazing it was

[http://www.babycentre.co.uk/s1001603/6-weeks-pregnant my baby is the size of a lentil]

Oops, try again

my baby is the size of a lentil

Misskjb I am keeping everything crossed for you! Good luck in holding out til Friday I was tempted every morning to poas but glad I held out.(then did 3 just to make sure!)

I did the clearblue digi test yesterday and it's surreal seeing it in words. We so wanted this but expected to take ages being overweight and over 30. Wish I had lost some more weight first I read the NHS website and its terrifying.

weebairn did you adjust your exercise any how? I have read high intensity exercise should be avoided in the 1st trimester. I spin, hill walk and do Ashtanga yoga so not sure if I should be doing any of them now!

The links great too. I am at poppyseed stage at the moment. Amazing!

binky I think exercise is quite a personal decision, I carried on with everything last time and generally think that you slow down so much in pregnancy anyway keeping fit is really really helpful. I did a giant 4 day hike when I was 14 weeks last time, which was absolutely fine except having to wee all the time, and was still doing slow 5 mile walks even at my due date. I think I was running till about 20 weeks. I did some swimming and yoga which feel better once you get bigger. I did some weights and workouts and things. I just listened to my body and at the point where you normally have to "push" yourself, I would take a little break instead. Be nice to yourself and drink lots of water. Take breaks.

I think general advice is if you are already exercising, feel free to carry on, but don't start anything new that's very strenuous. Maybe you could talk to your midwife at your booking in appointment? For now I would just continue, but like I say it's quite a personal decision and some people just don't feel comfortable (same with sex)

Is Ashtanga yoga the one were you get really hot? I think overheating is not a great idea, they tell you to avoid hot tubs and sauna as well. But generally yoga is GREAT for pregnancy. Tell your instructor you're pregnant, there are a few moves to avoid. (if you're doing it from home I can send you my list of things to avoid?)

I have a toddler now so am not as super fit as I used to be! I do some yoga (she climbs on me) and lots of general walking, running round parks etc. A swim when I can. Nothing more than that.

ps. You sound very fit and I would imagine that would counterbalance being overweight, to be honest. Google is not your friend on this!! If you eat right and exercise and stay active in labour I doubt there are many additional risks at all.

Hello everyone! ! Sounds like another healthy batch of bfp's, congrats guys.

Kiki your timeline sounds familiar, felt queasy at the start, ive just hit 5 weeks snd I feel like utter s**t. Constantly feel so so sick (actually been sick once ) and just feel exhausted all the time. This bit isn't much fun is it?!

Helen good luck with your tww, valentines day would be a great day for a bfp!!!

All this sickness is really not good at all. I hope it passes for you soon!

I've has weird horrible stomach pain since yesterday morning. Telling myself it's far too soon for anything pregnancy related but when you're in the tww it's too easy to account everything to pregnancy.

I'm intending to keep up with reasonably light exercise during pregnancy, but if I end up feeling shattered and sick then I don't know how appealing that will be!

Its funny how in the tww every twinge indicates pregnancy! Fingers crossed it is helen, wouwkd really prove this is a lucky thread!

I know, it's so annoying isn't it! Need to put it to the back of my mind this month though. Time's flying so won't be too long until I can find out!

Yeah fingers crossed! misskgb to test first though

Have you told many people mrsb?

AF has departed, hurrah! So back to trying. Lots of people announcing pregnancies/births and I'm stupidly v jealous.

Helen during my last 2ww I'd convinced myself I was pregnant by symptom spotting! Going to try not to do the same this month yeah right

Hazel- Woohoo! Yeah no good can come from symptom spotting at all. I'm hoping this stomach ache leaves and then I can go back to trying to ignore the tww and carry on with life!!

Yeah I know what you mean. I'm surrounded by babies! It'll be our turn soon though

Sickness and tiredness particularly so bad today.

Thankfully am not at work till next week, but even looking after a toddler is pretty exhausting. I put the tv on and nearly fell asleep at one point while she destroyed our front room and then drew on me with chalk. Normally we run around town and parks causing chaos, I do loads of stuff with her, we never stay in. I feel so guilty.

This bit is SO HARD because you have to put a brave face on it as no one knows you're pregnant!!

Tomorrow DP is taking baby out for the day and I am just going to sleeeeeep

Weebairn I'd love you to let me know which yoga postures to avoid. I do a bit at home and do classes. Going to stop Ashtanga and spinning and switch to hatha and swimming with lots of walking for fresh air at lunch (to avoid the office lunch smells)

Hope you feel better soon. Sleep sounds so good think I might do some of that now!

First day at work today since finding out. Have to remember to be normal and not talk about babies!

haha binky good luck with that!!

enjoy the rest today weebairn

I'm bowing out. I’ve made the decision to stop TTC. It’s putting too much of a strain on my marriage and it’s only cycle 2! I don’t think DH and I are on the same page with this for a variety of reasons that we can’t even talk about without it descending into an argument. I can’t cope with that and I can’t put a child through it either.

I’m heartbroken. Not quite sure how I’ll get through the day at work.

Oh no Hazel I hope you're ok. Is there no way you can try and sit down and have a proper conversation about it without it becoming an argument? I think it will be so hard to turn off wanting a baby after starting to try.

I don't know Helen. Everytime I try to talk to him he tells me I'm being unreasonable, I'm in the wrong...blah blah blah.

I've emailed him - no emotion in it, just what I was trying to say last night. He's refusing to read it.

I have no idea what to do. I'll be ok, I've wanted a child for 4 years, I've coped for that long, I can cope again.

What are you disagreeing about? If you don't want to talk about it that's fine though, don't want to pry!

His alcohol consumption, mainly. He doesn't think it'll have an effect on sperm, I've told him it does - especially at the level he drinks. Over 9 units last night alone. Apparently he wants to change his lifestyle, yet I'm not really seeing much evidence of this.

I've said I don't want the disappointment of endless months of BFNs just because he can't give up the alcohol for a few months. He doesn't get it. He can't understand why I want to stop TTC.

I'm so confused. I just want to go home, curl up in my duvet and sob.

Yeah that must be really hard. Men need to realise how much women have to go through when ttc and being pregnant. In the grand scheme of things reducing alcohol for a couple of months isn't a big ask. But on the flip side people wouldn't get pregnant from drunken one night stands if it totally affected your chances. But if you're serious about wanting a baby it's a totally different ball game I think and you need to be more committed to improving your chances.

Maybe you saying you want to stop trying will be enough to make him think it through for himself? Sometimes I think men are defensive because they feel like they're being backed in to a corner rather than they disagree with you that much?

Hope you're ok