TTC and still Breastfeeding? You are not alone - come to our bf-friendly cafe for a chat and some cake!

[MisterSafetyCatchIsNotOn]

Over here all breastfeeding ttcers! Welcome to our thread - a place for us to come for support, information and to talk about the extra challenges of ttc while still breastfeeding (or expressing like myself).

I thought I should go ahead and start the new thread as the old one is about to fill up and I didn't want anyone to get lost (hope that's ok Waiting and that you haven't already done this and I just missed it!)

For anyone who is new to the thread or needs a reminder, here are a few links to some useful websites (thanks Waiting for putting these together)

kellymom.com/bf/normal/ttc-while-bf/

kellymom.com/bf/normal/fertility/

www.llli.org/nb/nbmayjune04p114.html

www.fertilityfriend.com/Faqs/Fertility-charting-while-breastfeeding.html

Darn it and hello Angus! Good luck expanding your family! Has AF returned yet for you?

Day 33 today. Not entirely sure what's going on. Can't rely on sore boobs due to BF. Can't rely on tiredness cos exhausted is the new normal (I sympathise MrsD), AF giving nothing away as sometimes you feel a movement and rush to toilet only to discover CM.

Urgh!

If AF doesn't come tonight or early morning I think I'll hide myself in bathroom for 5 mins tomorrow and do a test before DP goes to work. I wouldn't feel right doing it without him here as we discovered DS pregnancy simultaneously

Thanks for the welcome

No AF, but had a return of EWCM the last two months. Have ordered OPK sticks to check any surges but will see how things go. Not in any hurry
(yet).

Fingers crossed for all those testing.

Hello, I have just added a new post re ttc and breastfeeding under the conception category but have just seen this thread so wondered if should join this one? Do I go to the end / most recent thread and add it there? Sorry to ask, new and confused!

Xx

Hello again - have copied my post in here which I hope is ok. It's a bit long and specific, but will hopefully resonate with someone!

I am mother to an 8 month old baby boy. He was exclusively breastfed until 6 months. He is now on solids and I am combination feeding. We would love to have another baby as soon as possible (this was the reason I decided combination feed / reduce breastfeeding). My understanding is that fertility returns when breastfeeding is drastically reduced or stopped completely and my questions to other mamas relates to this issue:

• has anyone reduced breastfeeding significantly and had their period return? If so, what was the timescale between the bfing reduction and the period?

• did anyone have to stop bfing completely and if so at what point did you realise that you would need to in order for fertility to return? How soon after stopping did your period come back?

I would like to continue breastfeeding my son if possible. I was hoping that a significant reduction might trigger ovulation but no sign yet. I am trying to work out how long to wait before making a decision about whether to stop completely.

Some details:
We co sleep. He night weaned a week ago. He currently breastfeeds at: 6.30pm, 5am, 6am, 8.30am.

Also, does anyone think the early morning feeds might prevent fertility from returning? Do you think I should drop the 8.30 feed and see if that triggers ovulation?

I would love to hear your stories, thoughts, wise words, advice - any mama who might be able to help, and especially anyone who is / was in a similar boat (and especially especially if you were ttc when your baby was under 1ish) xxxxxxx

Giuseppino, there are probably far wiser ladies than me who will hopefully come along and respond. But basically, it's a very unhelpful 'everyone is different' scenario. My periods returned with both my 2 when they were about 10 months, and about a month after night weaning. First time round they were still very erratic for a while, this time less so (I've had 4 periods so far with cycle lengths 34, 33, 36, 30 days, first time round I think there was 50 odd days between first period and next). Some people don't get periods at all until the stop feeding all together but I think that is a minority. Some get them back at the slightest introduction of anything other than BM. My sister exclusively breast fed both her 2 until they were 6 months, they weren't night weaned, they didn't have any dummies, any top ups etc. etc. and her periods came back after 6 weeks with them both (she was not impressed!). It really is so variable. From what I've read, a sudden significant reduction can trigger ovulation again so perhaps the night weaning you've done will be sufficient, but I'd say from my experience I'd say give it a few weeks to see if it has before reducing further if you can wait since yopu'd liek to continue feeding if possible.

Well, CD30 here. No symptoms of anything either way. Trying to stay calm and not think about it too much. DH wants to wait until at least next weekend to test so that AF would be late compared to longest cycle Ive had so far post DD. Sensible, but annoying!

Bloody (literally and figuratively) AF arrived today. Nah well, at I know. More annoying than anything. I'm too impatient. So who's up next this month?

Flowery, waiting til 37 days sounds like torture. But it is sensible and may save you a few quid in needlessly used tests.

Sorry AF got you Zoo.

Flowery I couldn't wait that long. I'm good at not testing early, but another whole week?!?! Hopefully you are more patient than me!

Giuseppino This board is living proof that you can conceive and continue to BF. Like Flowery said, everyone is different. My AF returned (er... quick count of fingers) when DS was about 8 months. I didn't have to do anything for them to return. Was introducing food to DS but he hadn't really dropped any feeds then. I don't think the early morning feed makes any difference. Some claim that night weaning helps, but there are ladies on here who only nightfeed and have had their BFP. The links at the top of the page are a really useful place to start to read up on fertility and BF. I would have loved a super close age gap after DS with any siblings, but I've now realised that for me, it's not as important as I first thought and things happen when they are meant to happen. If your DS night weaned last week, maybe something might happen in the next month or so. It is possible to catch the first egg, but often missed! You might find that when AF does return it takes a few cycles for them to regularise. Good luck in your efforts. Please feel free to hang out whilst you wait.

Oh I should be working. Is it bad I'm on here instead? Best get back to it. Oh and I am certain I'm ov-ing. Sharp pain on one side. Bleeding hasn't completely settled and I thought we should give it a couple of months but I am now thinking it can't hurt to SWI later! Can it? The sun is definitely helping me feel better

BFN for me today-cycle day 25. Not sure what is going on with cycles since miscarriage so can't comment.

Will TA

Posted to early!!

Will read and update properly later.

Aargh!!! too!

Ok, so in prep for next cycle, can anyone shed some light on OPKs? Never looked before but what the heck hey? Had a quick browse and some need monitors (do you poas then insert in monitor for reading or something like that?) and others are self contained (kind of like a preg test).

Is this right ? Think I'd opt for the self contained ones. I'm guessing they might not be as accurate or limited?

Can anyone shed any light on the cost of these things? Sorry I know I can google this info but can't right now and thought it'd be good to get feedback on usability as well.

Hi everyone Sorry I'm being so rubbish at posting recently, work has been super stressful (2.5 day week has been more like full time over the past few months - still only get paid for 2.5 days though!) and moving house just seems to take aaaages to get everything sorted, but I think things are finally beginning to calm down.

I'm on cd48 today , had completely lost track (for once not obsessively checking every day). As I don't know when I ovulated I'm not really sure when to start thinking about testing, but if I take Flowery's approach and go for the longest recent cycle (49 days) I will probably test over the weekend at some point. I think I'll get some tests in this afternoon as I have run out and then see how I feel! I have had a little bit of nausea in the last few days, but nothing else different to previous cycles and also had a lot of stress and not much sleep which could easily be the cause!

Flowery, your DH might be sensible but I'm not sure I could wait over a week! Are you sure he's not just trying to put you off a while so he can focus on the football I was amused by your ttc/world cup battle though, luckily neither me nor DH are that in to football so it's never been an issue! Do you have a good idea when you ovulated? Do you feel like you might be pregnant?

Sorry AF got you zoo. I have a little routine for AF days of getting myself a nice treat and some (or beer) for the evening, then snuggling up on the sofa with DH and watching something lighthearted. It gives me something to look forward to and stops me wallowing in doom and gloom so much! Hope you are treating yourself today.

Guise my first AF post DS arrived when he was 14 months old, about 2 months after I started back at work. Before then I was feeding every 2-3 hours in the day and 3+ times overnight. The night feeds continued but I had an enforced 11 hour gap twice a week which I think did make a difference, so for me it was more about having one long gap in the day than overall quantity of feeding or night weaning. However I didn't then get another period until DS gave up feeding (due to a bug that made it uncomfortable for him). I moved on to expressing instead but much less frequently and about 3 weeks later AF came back and has been more regular since then. However, I have always had long irregular cycles so am not the best model to use. There is a very broad range of what is normal, if you are in a hurry to get on with number 2 then I think spacing out feeds initially is a good way to go (which it sounds like you have done) and then give it a couple of months. I think 8-12 months is a very common time for AF to return if you are breastfeeding more to a schedule rather than on demand so hopefully you won't need to wait long.

mrsd definitely can't hurt to give it a go! Good luck!

Hi Angus, sounds like a perfect time to ttc number 2. Are you going to be abroad long-term or is this just a temporary posting?

Hope you're feeling better MrsC and had a nice day yesterday. I am off today but feeling a bit sorry for myself with awful hay fever so not really getting out and enjoying the sun.

Just seen your recent post zoo. With DS I used the self-contained version, which as you say are much like a pregnancy test. You can buy them in bulk on amazon for a few quid, not too pricey (although it adds up and are more expensive over the counter). The problem with them is that they are open to interpretation! Two lines come up and it is only positive when both lines are equally dark, so you can spend hours staring at the bloody things trying to work out if the lines are the same. In theory the second line should get darker as you get closer to ov until the two are equal, then lighten again and there is only a short window (maybe less than 24hours) where the positive will show. They are cheap and easy though and can also be used to satisfy the POAS urge without using up pregnancy tests during the 2ww!

I got a freebie monitor based set to try out recently but only used it once so far. With these (mine is clearblue) you start on a certain day of your cycle (depending on cycle length) and the test measures two different hormone levels to pinpoint a range of your most fertile days. You insert the stick in the monitor first and then pee on it, and the advantage is that the test reads the results for you and tells you whether it's a low, medium or high fertility day. They are much more expensive though, I'm not sure how much as mine was a free sample. I probably wouldn't buy them just because my cycles are too irregular so it's difficult to know when to start testing but I can see if yours fluctuate by just a few days each time they would be quite useful.

Hope that helps.

Thanks so much Flowery, Diddedoo and SafetyCatch! Really appreciate you taking the time to write and for being straightforward too. Have had a chance to think about what you wrote and feel encouraged to CHILL OUT a bit!! It seems sensible to not make any more changes / drop anymore feeds and just see what happens over the next 3 months - i think you are right that most of the time, periods return between 8-12 months / things happen for a reason. So might just hang out her for a bit.
Flowery, are you ttc no3? I would like to have 4 children if possible, another reason for the hurry!

MisterSaftey. Get you on not realising what CD it was! And bloomin' heck, 49 days, doens't make this processes any easier does it?! So, did you get a test?????

Also let's call it Mr. Boots approach rather than mine to wait until after longest cycle length! I didn't test until I was late with my first two but this time I would be inclined to test in a couple of days since I'll be past the shortest cycle length.

Giuseppino, yep, trying for numero 3. To be honnest, I do have slightly mixed feelings about it, but I've very much kept them underwraps because DH has mixed feelings and don't want to fule any of his 'just 2 is enough' sentiments. I want three children, when they are older I'm sure I will feel 2 is not enough, but I don't relish the idea of pregnancy and little baby again to be honnest. 3 will definately be enough for us.

Oh I hope sickness isn't as bad as I had last time, I have no idea how I coped then, and this time I will have 2 children to cope with, and since I didn't go back to work after number 2 it's not like on really bad days I can phone in sick to work and still send kiddies to child care like I did last time - we don't have child care! Oh heck.

CD30 today. No signs or symptoms of anything either way. Let's see how long I can hold out. Longest cycle 36 days but last one only 30.

hi flowery, I guess mixed feelings are normal when faced with working out how to look after two kids when pregnant with a third - don't think its easy. People think I am bonkers fro wanting more than 2, but I have a similar thing to you in that I think it will be hard when they are little but when they are older 2 just won't feel like enough. I come from a big family and love being part of a big family, I think I feel that even stronger since I am not from here (all my family are in Ireland).
Morning sickness is horrible though.....

Giuseppino, how many of you are there? I'm one of 6. DH an only child!

The sickness really worries me. I was pretty bad last time. Really struggled the first 20 weeks, then improved to be far more managable but didn't clear up - I was nausious for the whole rest of the pregnancy. Did feel bloody amazing after the birth though as it was so fabulous to finally not feel sick any more. This time I will DEMAND drugs from early on if it looks like being nasty again. Last time I kept being fobed off and believed them when they told me it would clear up/the medication wouldn't help much. Finaly got anti emetics at 37 weeks!

Thanks Mister, I absolutely positively DO NOT want to add any more "open to interpretation" options to the mix. Just wondering (or perhaps I'm thick), on Boots website there are three OPKs. Are these the self-contained ones? No mention of using the external monitor machine.
Dual Hormone Test with smiley
Test with smiley face
Test with lines
I'm guessing you used the second one?

Hi Flowery, I am one of 5 and a massive extended family. My husband is one of 2 and i wishes there was just one more to hang out with. I think he would be happy to stop at 2, maybe 3 - so 3 might be a middle ground! We agreed to just keep talking / thinking about it. Having 5 children was v hard for my mother so I know she does not want me to have more than one or two, but our circumstances are very different so that hasn't deterred me.
I found morning sickness very hard with my baba. I think I was shocked with how ill I felt - physically vomiting but feeling emotionally numb which surprised me and made me panic about how I would feel postnally. As it turned out I felt on top of the world and have stayed feeling good throughout. But maybe you wont feel so bad this time around? I know some people have said that there pregnancies all felt v different and others have said they think its related to gender?

re the OPK questions: I normally buy the super cheap ones from ebay (test with lines) and then if i think it looks positive(isn), I will re-test with a clear blue. Have got pregnant twice like this.

I'm hoping I won't be as bad this time Giuseppino! Wasn't nearly as bad first time as second time and first was boy, second girl so could have been gender. Also I was in a truely awful job that was making me misserable. I finished work as early as I could because I was so unhappy at work and so sick, and the sickness continued after I finished work so I don't think it was the job alone that caused the sickness to be so bad, but I think it made it harder to cope with because I was so misserable already! At least I won't have that this time round (I've not gone back to work after DD)

zoobaby the first one on your list (dual with smiley) is the one I have at the moment but haven't really used much. You get 10 little sticks and then the main bit with the screen that you see on that picture is the monitor (not sure if that's the right word for it?) - the little stick plugs in to the front and you use a new one each morning. A downside is that I think you can't just buy the test sticks separately so you end up having to buy a new monitor each cycle which is v pricey, clearly just a money-making scheme. Don't take my word for that though, it says that on my box I think but you might be able to get test sticks from somewhere else (amazon?).

The second one looks similar but less fancy as it only measures one hormone, so again 10 sticks that you plug in to a monitor. The third is the more basic poas with 2 lines, but if you're going down that route I wouldn't use the clearblue sets as they're expensive. Have a look at these one step tests, these are the ones I used and I think are just as accurate but you get 50 for the same price as 7 clear blue! Giuseppino's suggestion is a good one, if you test on cheapies til it looks positive then use a clear blue with monitor to confirm it should last 5-10 cycles so much better value for money.

Forgot to get a pregnancy test Flowery, but now cd50 and no sign of AF so I will get one this afternoon and probably test in the morning. I don't feel pregnant though. I've heard that tiredness and stress can make ms much worse so I'm sure your job had an impact last time around. Hopefully if you're able to take things a bit more gently next time that will make a difference.

I have a similar compromise to make with DH Guiseppino, I am one of 4 with lots of cousins who we used to see all the time / go on holidays with so I like big family noise and busy-ness, for DH it was always just him, his brother and his mum so he's not so sure. There is also the impact on careers to think of as we'd probably want one of us to be part time until the youngest is in school at least, that's why I want to get on with it! I'd kind of like 4 but at least 3, DH happy with 1 or 2. For now we're just focusing on getting number 2 and then we'll see.

Thanks for the info re OPKs. I think I will do a hybrid of cheap and expensive. I'm pinning all my hope on the faolure this cycle as being down to missing ov as opposed to the plumbing not working correctly. Can't help but over analyse... was cycle slightly longer due tofertilisation but then not enough chemicals released to allow progression,, did I miss ov etc.