New year, new thread, fresh start and a brand spanking new injection of a hot new batch of posifrickenity! This is the year where our wombs will be comfy and our babies plentiful! TTC after MC.

[Sal1977]

2014. The year of the rainbow baby. We pledge to be positive (most of the time). We pledge to cry less, shag more and swear lots. This is the one wannamummabees!

The Rules...

(1) A lady may only POAS on a Friday.
(2) Friday means the day that everyone calls Friday in the time zone where you spent the night.
(3) Rule (1) does not apply to POA-OPK-S, UNLESS they are being illegitimately used as surrogate HCG detectors, in which case Rule (1) most definitely does apply
(4) Rule (1) does not apply following a BFP because if you want to waste £25 a day POADigiS that's your prerogative
(5) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady is POAS in an attempt to get a BFN to prove she can start DTD with intent
(6) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady wants for unknown reason to pee on an actual stick, like a twig or some such, if that lady is unexpectedly caught short whilst tramping in the forest looking for bears.
(7) These rules (including Rule (1)) are subject to the change at any time if the ladies of the Posifrickentivity thread decide on a whim come up with empirical evidence to prove that it is luckier to POAS on any other day of the week
(8) Violators of Rule (1) shall be subject to fish throwing.

And as a grand finale, why not pledge to NEVER POAS before 14DPO?

I can't WAIT for sex to be sex again, rather than DTDWI!

Incidentally, as I'm procrastinating rather than writing a feature, I just looked at 'All about IVF' to the right of this thread. Pretty shite, other than getting to the bit for men where it says "The sperm are washed and spun at a high speed". Funny image of little sperms having a shower and then getting on a roundabout now...

Ooh, DH has just heard that his SA test results were normal. That's a relief, another thing to cross off the list. Always knew it was me, tbh.

Ooh, sounds like the description of a spin cycle on my washing machine! I am quite obviously procrastinating today too, I'm meant to be writing and designing a newsletter and really can't be bothered. Plus I'm working from home and my cat is making it very difficult to use the laptop as that is where she MUST sit.

Aww seasides that's good news re DH. Don't be too hard yourself, unexplained is such a shitty 'diagnosis'. Will they do anything more for you before considering IVF?

Having dtd daily for 6 days this month I am with you all on that front. I think dh enjoys it more than I do as I am thinking more about just getting the job done

Has anyone seen handsful recently?

I think the doc is now convinced I'm bringing it upon myself by being stressed - and I think she's right , also being down a tube can't help. However she did say she could refer me at a year and a half so I hit the top of the IVF waiting list at 2 years. Obviously I don't want to get there, but I don't know what else can be tested.

I'm going to ask for another 21 day blood test this month, but I expect it'll be normal. Also wondering about cysts. Might ask for a scan, and then we really will have crossed everything except 'just relaxing' off the list. But I'm really trying with that, going to CBT etc, and I do feel a bit better. Last year was just such a shitter it was impossible to relax. 2014 feels different!

However I have no idea if my other tube is blocked...but I kind of feel that if it is, it is. Tests can damage it, so what can I do but wait and see? Though if I knew it was blocked I could move straight to IVF...or would they try to unblock it and make me keep TTC? Conundrums.

Also, a mini sperm washing machine ! I bet that's not far off what they actually use!

It's difficult isn't it. Have you had an HSG to ascertain how your other tube is? (Apologies if you've already told us this - it's hard to keep up with the thread sometimes) Ahh, I didn't realise that tests could damage it - that's incredibly unfair.

'Just relax' makes my blood boil. Plenty of stressed women get BFPs! I'm tempted to have a private appointment to discuss options, the NHS is fantastic up to a point, but then they seem to shrug their shoulders and give up a bit. If only I had lots of money.....

No, they just had a look at it when they removed the other one and said it looks fine - no obvious kinks, etc. I have heard that the dye test can damage the tube, but that doesn't seem to be listed as a risk having done a quick Google. I might also enquire about having one an HSG test - yay, more dildo cam. Has anyone had one? Do they hurt?

Yes, the NHS is great in an emergency, but not so good with the rest. Someone on one of these threads says the NHS won't fund any fertility treatment (inc IVF) if you've paid for anything in the past, does anyone know if that's true?

seasides and otters, we can't be blamed for wanting to make sure we're being taken seriously and getting stuff done but the nhs has its pace and that is pretty much that.
I will be banging on GPs door after 6m this time, as that will be well over 2 years ttc with only 1 dead baby to show for it. If he can't/won't do anything at that point, we've agreed we'll go for a private consultation.

I am getting sorely fed up of wishing my life away on this baby stuff, it was SUPPOSED to be easy. Take fanjo, insert penis, expel baby.
I miss the person I used to be, I miss the sex I used to have, I miss the easy conversations I could have with friends about their family life, i miss my family talking to me like a normal person rather than an emotionally unstable wreck, I miss being able to walk around in public without worrying I'm going to start crying cos there's a pregnant woman in front of me. I just miss it. Ttc and MC are great big bloody life thieves and tho nothing will stop me wanting a baby, I fucking hate both of them for what they've done to me.

Sorry, that was very bleak. I'm actually in a (sort of) good mood today!

Chin up, tits out etc. etc.

I know this might sound like i'm a quack, I apologise if it sounds patronising but have you tried reflexology an or accupuncture?? If not for anything other than to help you relax? I know a few people who have found success. One friend was also told by fertility clinic to have acupuncture along side their first round of ivf. She now has beautiful twins.
I'm going to give reflexology a go next month if I have no success.

Sea Yes, that should read 12 DPO, duh. Starting to get a bit twitchy...

The thought of IVF scares the hell out of me. The cost... And then there really is no guarantee whatsoever that it will work.

The 'just relax' advice is just utter total cr*p. But you have to realise that the people who usually give it are probably instant-differs that sail through any pregnancy without any issues and therefore have absolutely no idea of how tough this ttc business is.
Having said that, I got the 'just relax' talk from my mum at one point, who really should know better

seasides Yes, I've had an HSG. It was totally painless and took 5 minutes. Just felt a little crampy when they inserted the dye and that was it. My consultant told me it can actually unblock any very small blockages that might be hindering conception.

Parsely I'm totally with you on all of that. Nearly two fucking years I've been at this (just like you). I'm meant to be on pregnancy number two by now ffs!

EnglishGirlAbroad I've been going to acupuncture for the past two months now. I LOVE it. It's very relaxing and it seems to have brought my ov date forward to CD15 rather than CD17.

Thanks otter - I've just booked an appointment to ask for one. Starting to wish I'd got one earlier - always the way, isn't it? Whatever works, I'm going to wish I'd done/known about a year ago!

Yep, been getting acupuncture for a year. In theory I think it's great, but it doesn't really seem to have done anything for me...I think I go now to feel like I'm doing something! Also it hurts me quite a lot.

Reeeally starting to want my life back too.

English cross-post! I agree that both acupuncture and reflexology are very valid treatments that can help with fertility issues - if they are done right. I once had a consultation with an acupuncturist who specialises in the fertility side if things, and she pretty much admitted that she didn't see much merit in doing acupuncture just for relaxation, rather than with a specific objective, and I agree with her (just my opinion) I had acupuncture for my migraines years ago, and it worked brilliantly.

I would love to have reflexology, but because I had a DVT a couple years ago, every reflexologist that I have spoken to wants me to get a signature from my GP that I can have it. And my GP doesn't want to sign the form because she doesn't know enough about it all

I meant the reflexology could be relaxing... I see no relaxation in having needles stuck in me either but needs must and all that. Haven't tried it yet, but i'm pretty much open to anything!! And agree that it should be carried out by someone specialising in fertility issues.
Rubbish that you cant even try reflexology jbrd

I think the relaxing bit of acupuncture is, for me, getting half an hour lying in a darkened room with nothing to think about. It's the half hour a week where I can really discuss my fertility issues with someone who cares and really knows her stuff. My acupuncturist specialises in fertility acu, I would absolutely recommend her (if anyone else is based around Edinburgh)

Yes, I do find that aspect of it really helpful otter - in fact I suspect we might see the same acupuncturist...! I'm based in Edinburgh and Dunbar. She's a wonderful woman with an amazing life story, and just seems really wise. It does make me feel better talking to her, I think that's actually who I keep going. That and I'm too scared of her to stop!

Not who...why I keep going!

Oh, you're quite near me then! I think we're lucky here, there seem to be quite a few acu specialists round these parts. I woman I see has the initials RF - don't want to be seen to be advertising!

Nope, mine is MC...ironically. That would have been funny! She does have a great track record of getting people upduffed, but I think she's getting worried about me...

Wow, you lot have been busy since I was last here! LOL at the bum toothpaste, the things you learn!

I had a very long week at work last week and ended up in exhausted tears on the bus on the way home on Friday. Caught a nasty stomach bug on Sunday and spent the whole of Monday and Tuesday between bed and making dashes to the loo. Still very tired today. I've tried temping for the first time this month but OV was due over the weekend and I think it was obliterated by the fever I was running. Oh well, up until Saturday we were making rabbits look positively prudish so maybe I'm not quite out of the running.

I'm only 3 weeks into my acupuncture treatment, but I agree. I have quite a cynical streak, and keep going back!

Yes, deuscat and jbrd hope you have your sticks ready for Friday. After my confident start, I am beginning to think about the very real danger of bfn. Maybe I need tissues ready too...

I think things like going to acupuncture etc just make me feel like I'm doing something about it all. Rather than feeling hopelessly helpless iyswim?

Although I dread to think what I've spent on acupuncture, vitamins, more vitamins, herbal treatments, opks, hpts, more vitamins, books on fertility, books on pregnancy (which are well hidden away at the moment), did I mention vitamins, wine , etc in my TTC quest over the past two years

Hi otters and seasides I sm based on Efinburgh too. it really is a small world. Would you mind passing on your acupuncturists details please? I am considering either it or reflexology and it is always good to have recommendations