TTC 10+++ months part 18

[Mrsden]

This is the BFP thread.

Euro I really hope the migraine is just a random Xmas related thing and not what you fear. When is your scan? 2nd? Big handhold to you. The wait must be torturous. Take heart from the good HCG numbers you had please. Big handhold Euro and snuggle in tight Euro bean.

Joy I'm ever so sorry Xmas was upsetting and stressful. I hope you get your CH sorted soon. I'm so relieved Xmas is over for another year. I find it so hard to see family members who I don't get on with and pretending everything is okay. I was also surrounded by little people, one in particular was v difficult and her parents just let her run riot!

Fox I'm glad you enjoyed Xmas. I'm sorry follow up was difficult but glad you seem to have some sort of plan in place.

Sar did mini sar arrive in time for Xmas?

I'm on day 7 of stimms. It's going okay. I'm still sniffing my down reg meds on full dose as before and I think it's beginning to change me. I snapped and yelled at MrSea for something stupid yesterday and I'm getting regular hot sweaty flashes. Yuk

Stimms meds are fine and injections are almost painless but the Clexane injections have given me a collection of bruises on my stomach and I'm struggling to find a space to inject without hitting a bruise. The Clexane is sooooo painful.

Hello all. Just popping in to offer some massive hugs. Like sar says, I remember the sadness all too well and last Xmas was my worst ever. I wish I could make it better for you all. cos after everything you have been through recently, I can imagine this would be a particularly hard year. Big hugs.

euro I had a lot of migraine in the first few months of pregnancy. Like you, I worried that it meant af was round the corner but I think they were just hormonal. The wait for the scan must be agonising. Hope you managed to enjoy your Xmas. Ps ha ha at men killing

sea you are onto stims already! It must feel good to be progressing with things. Don't worry about the snappiness , you'll quickly be back to normal once the hormones have left your system (hopefully replaced with preggo ones!) I've just finished a course of post birth clexane and have bruised thighs! We were like yeah clexane, done that before.

joy sorry about the crappy day yesterday. Do you and Roy have anything nice planned for the rest of the break? Hope you get your heating back soon .

ten I was so sorry to read that you didn't get your bfp. For us in a v similar situation to you, it was all about the numbers game and finding the right embie. Great news you have the NHS cycle to go. Will you be doing that at create?

Waves and xmassy luffs to everyone else.

sea this seems to have gone really quickly after such a long wait to start. How are you feeling? Have they said when they think EC might be yet?

gin thanks for the reassurance. I wish this journey could be easier for all of us.

Euro - It's so hard waiting for the scan especially as you have been here before and so easy to compare things to last time. Boob pain can come and go and I hope it has no relation to anything.

Sea - of course you are snappy , it messes with all your hormones. I think you are doing amazingly well considering. I didn't realise you had to continue to down reg whilst stimming. My stomach went totally black from the clexane and by 8 weeks I had to go to a nurse because it looked so bad and wrong. She told me to start doing it my thighs to give the tummy some respite so might be worth doing? The thighs bruises took a good few months to go down but I have very thin skin.

Gin- you must have had an amazing Xmas albeit exhausting. I just can't imagine it.

Well so pleased that day is over. Just have to get through NYE next which strangely I also find emotional.

Handhold for euro! The scan will be soon! It's tough, I spotted for 10days which signalled my mc last year, but I didn't this time! So hard tho :(

Big sorry for all the miz christmasses. Last year was a particular low point for us too. Big hugs!

Euro - No idea when EC might be yet. Follies are still small apparently. I hope you are doing something that takes your mind off "men killing".

Gin - How was baby G's first xmas. So so lovely to have a newborn at this time of the year. I can no idea they make you do Clexane post birth as well. Gulp.

Joy - I am completely with you on NY as well. I also have my birthday v soon after which is . Late Dec and early Jan is always difficult for me. Are you doing anything nice for NYE? I asked about doing the Clexane on thigh but they said they prefer the belly. I had no idea you have to keep taking this evil injection post transfer.

Had an extraordinary long wait today. Follies are still small ish so more stabbing to come. Will be spending NYE with preggo friend (all the no alcohol people have to hang together ). I hope my hormones behave that night I don't turn into a monster and start yelling at people. I never realised how much I depend on alcohol during this time of year. Sober Xmas and NY sucks!

sea I hear you on sober Xmas. I can't remember the last time I didn't spend these days in a pleasant alcoholic haze. It was just me, Mr euro and my mum and dad for Xmas Day. Mr euro and my mum only drink tiny amounts and my dad was taking it easy as he was driving. We opened a bottle of champagne with lunch. I had to pour a flat glass's worth down the sink in the evening as it hadn't been finished! I could have cried. I've no idea what we are doing for NYE yet. If it's all for nought, I am going to go out and get absolutely trollied for my birthday next month!

Slow but sure growing is good. The clexane sounds evil. It's offered at my clinic but I declined and just took aspirin. I've been tested for clotting disorders and don't have them so there didn't seem to be a good reason to put myself through that.

joy it's not surprising that you find NYE emotional. I do too.

gin this must have been an amazing Christmas for you. How are you finding it all?

Thanks for the handholds. Scan is a week tomorrow.

It has been amazing euro and I still don't quite believe we have our baby! As you may have seen on the other thread, we had a hard labour and birth, which combined with lack of sleep has been tough, but worth every minute of it. Breast feeding is not going well, but she's regaining weight thanks to mr nestle. I just feel incredibly lucky to have our baby. It's funny to think that we saw her being put back into me as an embryo in create!

sea most people don't have to have clexane post birth, it was due to having an instrumental delivery. I def found it the worst of the ivf jabs and like euro refused it during the FET. It was a lot easier doing it this time, knowing the end result.

Urgh I hate NYE too. So much pressure to have A Good Time.

Pout Hope that you got all of your Christmas prep done in time, I seem to alwasys be running around no matter how much time I leave myself

Buzz SPD sounds awful, sorry you are suffering!

Euro although I liked create I did get frustrated sometimes about the lack of customer service vs the amount of money you are spending, especially when one of the receptionists made a mistake over what she was meant to charge me for…. BRILLIANT news about the hcg levels, I hope you had a lovely Christmas as a result (despite having to throw champagne away….galling)

Sea sounds like you are doing well, I only started the clexane after egg transfer (well I ended up doing an FET) and it was definitely the worst of the lot, one side of my tummy hurt much more than the other which is weird. I found icing the spot for 5 mins before stabbing helped a lot (sure you have already tried that though). I carried on as normal as this was the advice I was given so as not to loose your mind.

Mad for the first time ever this year I found some of FIL comments annoying, luckily I had SIL on side so she took him on for me when he made ridiculous right wing sweeping statements as for once I was truly gobsmacked.

Critter – wow only a month to go! Fantastic news!!

Doll Oh no no one needs bugs over Christmas, hope you are all recovered by now!

Cos – sorry you were sad over Christmas. I was a little bit, mainly as we kept going to stay with people with kids and I was all wistful and what if….and then we kept going to stay with people with kids and WTF is it with other peoples kids…….they are SO ANNOYING.

Joy – I understand about worrying about the situation being the same next year and the year after, the only way I stay sane is just to assume that that wont be the case, I am just holding on to that for now but I assume after a couple more failed rounds of IVF I will start to find this approach harder to keep up.

Gin hope you had a lovely Christmas with tinyGIn, it is lovely to have a new born around this time of year. With you on the NYE pressure, we have friends coming to stay which will be great, I am looking forward to starting a new year! Sorry to hear you had a difficult birth, it should be all plain sailing for those of us who take longer to get there, that should definitely be the deal!

Hello Fox glad to hear that your review went well and you have a plan for the new year!

Waves to everyone else, Lemons etc.
I was a bit sad (and still am tbh) but am just moving forwards. Getting on with the NHS round, and presuming everything will be ok in the end……. Spending Christmas with other people’s children has taken the pressure off a bit briefly, holy crap when they aren’t yours to discipline and are behaving like little shits kids are annoying. I really hope that when they are yours the hormones mean that you think they are charming beings instead of the miniature violent dictators that I have had the pleasure of spending time with recently (Or is it just the parenting [catty emoticon]).

Ten - Of course you are sad. You have been through a lot and it's hard enough without Xmas on top it it so soon after. A big handhold.

I hear you on kids behaving badly at Xmas. I was surrounded by little people on Xmas day. One in particular was a real pain and the parents say nothing. Grrrrr.

Gin - I am sorry to hear you had a difficult birth. All 10 plusser pregnancies and deliveries should be a breeze after what you had to go through to get there. What an amazing gift at the end though. I hope you are loving motherhood.

Euro - Pouring champagne down the sink!!!! My goodness. That's not right. I only ever have 2 drinks at any one sitting so I had thought it would be easy to not drink at all but it's amazing how it helps over the Xmas period. Not looking forward to teetotal NYE either. I sound like a big lush don't I?

I hope you are not stressing too much. Not long now till the scan.

Okay. Big moan alert. I am having in-law fatigue. MIL is staying with us and has completely organised all the plates in my cupboards, taken over the kitchen and was found snuggling with MrSea watching Downton Abbey on my laptop. I am trying not to let it get to me but it is slightly (not helped by hormones/drugs etc)... she is v helpful and nice but just a little too much. Also having to contend with BIL and his family which includes a kid who is so spoilt that it's unreal. Actually quite happy to go into my bedroom to do the injections just to get a bit of peace. Oh please help me... only 3 more days until I have my home back.

sea that sounds awful! I bet you are counting down the days. The kitchen organisation would really piss me off.

ten of course you are sad. An IVF BFN is extra tough, because of all the effort that goes into the cycle. I love your description of the children as "miniature violent dictators" - spot on!

gin I saw that you had a hard time. I hope you are recovering well. She is gorgeous!

Sorry about the sadness ten. It's to be expected though. Life is tough and IVF BFN are SHIT. This time of year is so full of family stuff and looking back to the past year and forward to the next. Handhold and have some amazing chocolate cake that I just finished baking.

Sea I already thought you were the most patients person I "know" but this confirms it. Your ILs sound too much by about a factor of 100. So sorry. Counting down the days with you.

Great to hear a little about ginster's first christmas. So sorry it's been tough, gin. I agree the 10+ers should have easy pregnancies and sneeze births. We deserve it.

Big luffs to all the 10+ers!

How's everyone doing today?

We had a properly lazy day yesterday when we didn't leave the house. I was pretty much glued to the sofa all day, working my way through all the Xmas snack food. I must move at some point today!

Lemons thanks for the sympathy! They leave tomorrow! I'm not that patient but mil is actually a v nice person just have boundary issues

Euro. Your day on the sofa sounds like a dream. You deserve to relax after all the worries this year. Still cheering on euro bean. I hope you are not "men killing " too much.

Bil and sil dumped 3 kids with us today so after heading to the clinic for blood and scan in the morning I have been on babysitting duty all day. Mil was with us and insisted on holding mrsea's hand while I take care of the kids. So exhausted!

On the IVF front I'm on day 9 of stimms and really feeling v bloated and uncomfortable now. But doc thinks I have another 6 days of stimms as although I seem to have quite a few follies they are still quite small. Can't quite believe I have another 6 days of this. I have also been put on steroids which gave me quite a "high" today.

Blimey, that's a lot of stimming! Because of my two lead follies racing away, I had EC on CD12, so only stimmed for 7 days (CD2-9, and then triggered on CD10). That was quite long enough. I think this whole year has prepared you for being extremely patient! You are doing so well.

How come MIL and your husband have left you babysitting the IL's kids? The cheeky feckers. I'd retire to bed for a couple of hours to do some egg growing if I were you!

To be fair MrS and mil were helping but mil doesn't get to see mrS so much so when we went for a long walk they were walking hand in hand leaving me with the 3 kids for most of the trek. Wow that was hard work!

I'm really scared of stimming for another 6 days. I hope the growth speeds up a bit. I have developed really bad backache, pain in lower calves and it hurts to pee now. I already look pregnant. I can't figure out if I'm responding slowly because they put me on a v low dose to begin with or I'm not responding well. I started out on 150ul or 75ul of fostimon and/or merinol and in the last 2 days 225 ul of merinol. Any ideas ladies? I do ask questions when I go for the scans but they just tell me it's fine, looks like a few more days etc.

Morning Sea, I get very tired and impatient by reading about your Christmas. As to time taken and dosages, it's not too dissimilar to mine. I was stimming for a full 14 days on 150 gonal-f. I think if you're likely to respond (too) well they prefer to start you off on a lower dose. Is it LP? That takes longer to get going as well, because your ovaries are fast asleep when you start!

Waves at the others! Hope all christmasses have been survived and I order relaxing sofa days all round!

Lemons. Haha. Yes I felt tired too about my Xmas. The good news is all the ILs leave today. I can finally rest now.

Thanks for the insight into drugs and stimming. Yes I am on LP. I think you might be right about ovaries being really sleepy when I started. My estradiol was really low when we started so that's probably why. I guess I will just have to be more patient! I hope you had a lovely Xmas. I agree with you about sofa days all round.

Hurrah for peace and quiet, sea!

How are your follies doing now? I think I probably would have done better on LP, given my two run away follies.

Follies are doing well I think. Still growing slowly but steadily. They think I have around 14 in total and the largest is around 12mm so I probably still have another 3 /4 days to go. Feeling good generally. A bit bruised and tender but nothing terrible so can't complain.
How are you doing Euro? Not too worried I hope. And I hope your headache has gone. I think it's only 3 more days until your scan isn't it?

Well done Sea , that all sounds good. The one benefit of the Argy is how well they monitor you and so you can always be sure you are in safe hands. Sorry you are a bit in pain , quite a few people I came across had this. Your AFC is obviously a lot more than 7!

Euro. How are you? Any symptoms?

Hope everyone has had an ok break. I have to say I've been particularly hormonal and wound up this Xmas. I have that horrid nervy feeling in my tummy as spending NYE with some friends who are TTC. I am worried she is going to tell me she is preggers. Do others get this anxious about seeing good friends?
SiL has had another m/c around the 20wk mark. They are obviously devastated. Strange they have had this bad luck after 2 easy pregnancies prior. I guess the one lucky thing is they have kids already and conceive easily but I'm sure if I was in their position I wouldn't see it like that.

Your poor SIL, joy. That must be awful. Do they know what went wrong?

I do get the "the dread" when I'm seeing someone and I think there might be an announcement in the offing.

sea that sounds like good steady growing. :)

I am not sure, I don't think Roy has asked. Both have been mmc and all has looked fine up until that point. Must be absolutely horrendous.

sea well done on all the stabbing, sorry have no other input on the matter, hope you are enjoying your family free time now

joy sorry to hear about your SIL she must be devastated. I am sure they will run tests on the baby and placenta, some women do have normal pregnancies then develop immune issues after. She won't see it like that but you are right they have a family and seem to conceive quickly, some people don't always see how lucky they are already, although this is a sad situation, don't let them dump on you and Roy

euro how is the men killing going??

Well I have to go out in this vile weather and I haven't even dressed yet

buzz the men killing is still there. I felt nauseous pretty much all day yesterday, but I'm ok today. I'm around the point when it stopped growing last time, so obviously pretty nervous. And whilst I know symptoms can come and go, it is not helpful! I feel very guilty about willing away my holiday days, but Friday just cannot get here soon enough.