Put on your capes and rub the Unicorn belly aka "my dear, please pour baby gravy on my egg!" - JUST SHAGGING PART 18!

[ZingWantsCake]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share and with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

The link to Part 17 is here

Happy shagging shaggers!

no grad thread link sorry, can someone else add this please?

Hi Shaggers! Congratulations Fifi!!!

Just popped back to see how everyone is & read about that awful article in the Telegraph!! I can just imagine him shutting his laptop with a self-satisfied sigh, lighting a cigar and heading off to a strip club before heading home to a roast dinner cooked by a wife in a high necked jumper he bought for her.... Tosser!

Hope everyone is well & awaiting a flurry of BFPs!

yay, congrats fifi, exciting times!

The Fertility Show does what it says on the tin, I think. One of those events at Earls Court with stands and talks etc. Not really sure what to make of it but may be worth a go, if only London was cheaper to get to from the west country.

yes, yes, YES!!!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! [flowers}

yeyfifi what lovely news. Hurray!

lil I'm the worlds most impatient person so I want to test hourly! Will try and wait a couple of days and get a super duper shiny clear blue digital job. DP is over the moon. Being very weak have sent a pic of test to my two bestest buddies. One is pregnant, one is under investigation .

We practised Jsing this month so I don't know when I iced. App estimates I'd only be 9dpo. I normally have period pain in the week leading up to AF so I was a bit positive. Nothing else I'm afraid, more a lack of AF symptoms than pregnancy symptoms.

The only thing we did differently this month was to have less sex! We thought over shagging might be reducing his man numbers.

I'm happy and quite shocked too, now it's actually here I'm like

Oh on a different note DP is auditioning for pointless today so he may be on your tv soon! (Not that he knows any general knowledge)

you must be feeling all tingly and keep saying unbelievable - don't you?

so so happy for you!

I'm at work and feel like bursting! I want to wait a bit before I tell family and til after the scan for general people. I like a drink and a cigarette or two so it's going to be pretty obvious something is going on when I've got gum and diet coke!

Aaaahhhhhh wasting time at work already googling baby/conception stuff....

Minor update: have just popped out at lunch and got myself a clear clue digi job. Think it need it laid out clear and simple before I do cartwheels. POAS action will recommence in the morrow!

Fx fifi

Congratulations curly

Essie I think the 21 day test is the one I'm having but gp told me to have it 7 days before ertd. Opks work on a certain hormone so don't work for everyone - they aren't supposed to work on women with pcos but I think my meds are working well to control it because they worked for me this month. I've only noticed ewcm one month but I guess it could go in the loo when you go so easy to miss?

minion I'm sorry about your dad. I've had similar news but about a child relative. :(

Ertd should be here any day then I can book/plan blood tests and other related activities including sex!

Woohoo Fifi! That's fab news!

Coffee- lovely to hear from you. So glad it's all okay.

Hi to Waves if you look in on us. Good to see you biggin the thread up. Also, lovely to hear from you.

Been AWOL fighting the ladies' cause and nearly missed Fifi's BFP!

DH's SA done this week and got follow-up appt next wk so notice JS going on here. But I am mildly optimistic about next month.

Yay fifi! Expect a full report tomorrow when you've done the big boy!

How was DH with doing the SA bear? My DH is booked in for 11th but not sure how to discuss it with him. Did he do it there or at home Can discuss in private message if you would prefer! lol.

Oh no Dulcet- I'm fine discussing here if you are. He's done several so I don't think it phases him as much now. He has to do it at home and get it in within the hour. I don't help as we tried that the first time but I think it felt too false and the pressure was a bit much. Now he gets on with it in the bathroom/ spare room and I slept through it! maybe you could ask him if he would like a helping hand and that might help you broach the subject to begin with ?

You should get a leaflet about it too. Remember you can only help in certain ways as they don't want saliva or lubricants or anything contaminating the sample. Also, it has to go straight into the pot.

Thanks bear. He said from the off that he wants to do it at home and with help so I think that's decided. We both have a day off especially and I am concerned about it being a bit false and pressured but it's got be done.

Haven't had a leaflet though, was wondering about the saliva issue so that's good to know! The lady I spoke to when booking just said to store it under an arm to get it there but someone here said about in the bra! lol.

I have no patience whatsoever, digi confirmed I do have a BFP, 1-2 weeks from conception so I'm just about 4 weeks pregnant :)

Not ready to graduate yet! I want to see some more BFPs first!

Haha fifi, id be the same. Congratulations! What does that make the due date?

Congrats fifi! Hooray for the BFP!

20th July, a very long way off yet! I'm hoping on an elective c section after a bad experience last time so this one should be out a couple of weeks earlier.

Supposed to be on the beer with my dad this weekend so I've had to tell him.... So had to tell my mum too, my 2 brothers and 2 sisters.... And now I'll stay quiet! Oh and DP has told his parents. I don't believe in the bad luck marlarky, though obviously I know it's early days so a bit premature, I'm just bloody excited!

Huge congrats Fifi! Great news!!

fifi

I don't believe in bad luck malarkey either.
and I normally get so sick so quickly I need some help so I always to tell a few people...

My parents are divorced so I get the 'why am I last to know?' Thing. A group message is just safer!

ah you could be mean and say that a bunch of Internet friends were the first to know anyway!

and I presume you did another one this morning?

Woohoo congratulations Fifi