Put on your capes and rub the Unicorn belly aka "my dear, please pour baby gravy on my egg!" - JUST SHAGGING PART 18!

[ZingWantsCake]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share and with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

The link to Part 17 is here

Happy shagging shaggers!

no grad thread link sorry, can someone else add this please?

quarks you can be as snappy as you like with me, remember I'm also a mascot, I'm trained for all emergencies!

(hugs)

I'm getting in the pity jacuzzi, too, so scoot over. DH's repeat semen analysis was just as dire as the first. 0 percent morphology. Follow-up consult with the doctor on Sept. 23. I am fairly certain she'll recommend IVF with ICSI, where they inject hand-selected sperm into the egg(s) direct. I'll be relieved once I have final answers and can actually make decisions. Right now I want to scream. There are horrible human beings who leave newborns in dumpsters. Meanwhile, here I am. Here we all are, shagging up a storm and yet suffering with ERTD and the like! [unfair face]

Oh red, sorry to hear that. I guess you are getting closer to answers but still not easy to take. Hope the consultant appointment goes well anyway. Out of interest, how does DH feel about it? Mine has his SA next weekend (ish - need to book it but only want to do it when he's no use to me!) and I do wonder how he will feel if it does come back with issues.

Your two month plan sounds good quark. At least, even though you are having a break, you are doing something proactive towards TTC. Get planning and the 2months will go really quickly!

Sorry ladies a hooya is well needed! We're giving up because OH is a prick and doesn't want a baby that's born June, July, August as he says they will be the youngest in the year when they go to school, he has banned dtd, also he's having an op to replace his shoulder and that's a couple of days after we get married so I'm guessing all bets will be off til the new year, still no ERTD here, and boobs have stopped being sore, I think I'm just gona buy another cat :-)

Oh curly, my DH had that exact same thing last year. Thought being youngest in the year would mean they would struggle - like it's that simple! Plus, I'm an August baby so how bloody rude! Anyway, he has given that up this year. I think that was back when he thought it would be easier to get of than it has proved to be...

curly the thought had crossed our mind too, but this TTC business is too hard to be messing about with! The only month we don't want is December as its DS's birthday and obviously Christmas

Curly Tell him he has mortally insulted me. ( )
I was born end of Aug and I'm very smart and confident and won several competitions beating much older kids.
being the youngest in the class is fab.

our 2 oldest are both July, my eldest was year 7 last year and top of his class and both well above average in most subject!

(can I punch him?)

he is BVU!

red missed your post

so sorry to hear. you are right, completely unfair.

it makes my blood boil when people mope about "gender disappointment"!
I want to bang their heads against the wall on behalf of all the couples who have had MC or had stillborn babies or neonatal deaths or lost children in any other tragic ways or are infertile or struggling to conceive or whatever....

I want to throw grips at them and scream in their faces that as long as your child is breathing you have nothing to be disappointed about!
stupid miserable idiotic twats!
I am sympathetic towards so many things but that one I will never get despite the fact that I had a 3-day "oh, but I wished for a girl" when DS3 was born, which I later put down to the shock of him being born so quickly I had an adrenaline tsunami that left me shaking for days

rant over

as you were

Curly86 I'm another August baby who did well at school - all A's and A*'s - he's being a dope!

Big hooya to Mr. Curly! I am a June baby and proud of it. Then again, in the States, the age cutoff is somewhere around October/November, so those kid were always the youngest in class. It only mattered in college, when everyone was 18 except for those few fall-birthday kids who were 17 and couldn't get into 18-and-over places. Nothing a fake ID can't fix

I'm right with you on that rant, zing!

zing DH and I agree that while we'd love a girl we are just as thrilled if we get a wonderful boy or two.

I think it's ok to have a preference, but to actually be disappointed? Not ok. I've had aunties say "Oh, I'm glad XY is having a girl, it's much more fun to shop for girl's baby clothes".

WTF?

alohomora

exactly, preference is normal, and there could be so many reasons!
with DS1 I was hoping for a boy.

but to actually feel and be miserable or even "mourn" for months and years, like your life has ended just because you had yet another of the same is just...I don't know what that is.

Just when I thought I was over the guy on the bog trauma the same frigging thing happened today! With a total randomer in an andy loo at an event! Ffs! What's the matter with me! I'm having bad bog luck!

red sorry to hear your latest. :( how rubbish. The only good thing I can think though is that at least you know now. for you.

zing I'm with you on that rant. Can't even begin to imagine what goes through some people's heads, the long term effect they can have on that child by being disappointed from the moment they turn up in the world is immeasurable.

curly another one here, my DH is an early August baby and got all a's and a degree in economics, my bro is a June baby and got a first degree. Being the youngest in academic year almost seems to be an advantage!?

Viroids. I'm a bit worried. Got brown spotting and its been going on a bit this cycle. Cd20 now. We've jsed pretty much every day bar the odd day which is the first cycle we've managed this, but I've had brown spotting, since about day 10. Not really sure what's going on as its not normal for me. Sorry for tmi. Any words of wisdom before I trot off down the docs for some routine patronising?

Totally agree aloho. And frankly, I think the boy clothes in the stores the past few years are as cute if not cuter than the girlie outfits!

Talking of long term effects, I remember standing in the hallway of our house when I was ten and my dad had come home from the hospital where my mom had given birth to take me to her. Gran came down the stairs and asked "And, what is it?" and he answered "It's a son and heir."

To this day I remember standing there thinking, what am I, chopped liver?

aloho

I think we all need a bit of cheering up now - warning: contents might make you piss yourselves laughing!

Zing I know! My dad's a right case, anyway, but it still hurt and I remember it.

Whinge. I'm in private parts pain tonight, so I'm not in the bed mood anyway!

wow so much to catch up on!

sorry you had more rubbish news red thinking of you

sorry to those having to hold off for a couple of months too. my bff from school is getting married next July so if we don't get pg this month next month would clash with her wedding. I am her maid of honour and I have no intention of stopping TTC. if I get upduffed that month I'll deal with it then. I'd be happy to step down as moh if it meant sod brought me my bfp! Originally I considered stopping but dh and I talked about it and decided not to. i understand how you feel and perhaps I'm selfish, but I think sometimes you have to be. would they put off their dreams for you? my bff wouldn't

the whole youngest in year group is one I thought about too before we were TTC. now I couldn't care less if my bfp was due Xmas day. yeah it would suck but not as much as being bfpless! and pleased to hear the theories on youngest in year group are bollox!

cd7 here. should be starting EOD tomorrow but dh needs to abstain for 3 days had been more the 10 so had to "reset the clock" yesterday! so will have to start after he dies his hft on Monday, grrr!

Red- I'm with you all the way and F off to anyone who says, 'Well, life's not fair.' I find only people who have never had any kind of hardship tend to resort to that one. hopefully you can get going with treatment soon though and get your plans underway.

C

Argh- hadn't finished.

Congrats Trood!

Some twat has just started letting off fireworks down our road.

Personally, I wouldn't put off Ttc and would just buy a bigger/different dress at the time. I don't think that's selfish though. It's so difficult to get upduffed for some of us that I'd take every chance you can. But that's just how I feel about it.

Hope you're all well.

why is it my never horny dh is like a randy kid when he isn't allowed to DTD?! I may have to ban sex around icing instead of insisting on it!

I read a piece of research that followed the amount of tips strippers received over a month. Apparently it was about $40 a night average but over the time she was ovulating it went up to about $70 a night. Men are meant to find us more attractive when ovulating so I can't explain why it's not what happens when we need it too.

lil my usually pesky randy won't leave me alone dp is never in the mood these days when he needs to be! how we are going to conceive I don't know!