The Elderberry Pavlovas- All aboard the Berrycopter. Thread 14

[funkymonk]

The smallprint - Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 3+months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot) and def no mention of baby dust or baby dancing UGH !!! Ooh we are strict...please note your house may be at risk if you do not keep up repayments lol

spare it's possible that we conceived via a sneaky, v quiet dtd at my MiL's house before we left for the airport .
(It was our first clomid cycle, we were trying very hard to cover all bases).

Actually, thinking about it, it's a middle finger up to all the 'relax' bollocks. It was the most pressured cycle because of the clomid and we were travelling over shag week so had to fit dtd around visiting MiL, staying with a mate on an airbed in her lounge and camping in a tiny weeny tent. Believe me, that bfp was bloody hard work and definitely not the result of relaxing! Just a pity it didn't stick .

barking I think you're doing all the right things. Time outside with a friend getting gentle exercise will help your body and your mind, and keeping in contact with people who love you will help you feel less isolated in your grief. The more people who can support you through, the better. That being said, next time, would you please take Bristowpooch with you? Vet says he's too chubby

I agree with you about the whole "relax" nonsense. If tension or stress prevented pregnancy, then nobody would ever get pregnant from a sexual assault, or while in grinding poverty, or during wartime or famine or any of that. So much of why things happen when they happen can just never be known. Personally when I hear "relax" it feels a little victim-blamey. The real stress of TTC didn't sink in til the 6-8 month mark for me, so why didn't cycles 1-5 work??

As for me, this hasn't been the greatest week; I've felt 'off' since Saturday and haven't gotten my mojo back. On the TTC front, this cycle has been an epic fail on the DTD front - DTD 2x during the window - and for the first time in over a year, I don't automatically know what cycle day I'm on, nor am I temping or paying any attn to CM. Not sure if I should feel liberated, or like I've given up and just biding time til Clomid and/or IVF.

Although I have to say again that I am massively encouraged by the BFPs lately and am much more hopeful than I used to be that intervention of some kind will actually work for us, since it has worked for others. Sometimes in a big way! Thinking of boom with her 2-for-1 pregnancy!!

"Relax and it'll happen" is unscientific, infuriating bullsht. But well done on the sneaky IL-conception, barking*. Better plan another visit to them when you guys are ready to go again.

Sorry you've been feeling grotty, Sid. And yes! IVF/IUI/intervention works! There is hope for us all.

We had our fertility clinic initial planning meeting today. IVF a-go-go! I had my first delightful encounter with the dildocam - I really think there should be a 2 drink minimum for strangers inserting things into your nethers, but nevermind! The nurse unhelpfully took one look at my bits before dashing out of the room to get a doctor, leaving us alone for 20 mins, me naked from the waist down, just twiddling my thumbs. Thankfully the doc immediately declared my poor scary right ovary entirely normal, but there's a cyst I have to have rescanned before I can be properly booked in to start, and my left ovary disappeared and wouldn't be found after all that, so that was a bit of a waste of time and KY jelly. But, rescan appearances allowing, we could be set to go with my period next week! Feeling quite excited now, I think.

I'm now lying on the couch while Mr Rum does the hoovering. If I have to be "the patient" through all of this (nevermind there are TWO of us trying to make a baby, you wouldn't believe that at all for all that today's talk was directed at him), I shall milk it for all it's worth.

I made my thoughts on the 'just relax' camp clear in my sweary rant at the start of this thread

barking Glad the walk helped, and I'm sure some dog cuddles will help this week. As will Berry words of support if you hang around...

Sid I think there are some bugs doing the rounds at the moment. I worked from home today as I have the beginnings of lurgy and it has been flying around our office since the schools went back

So what is everyone up to this evening?

rum I wholeheartedly approve of being a patient!
My best mate is starting IVF this week and has practically requested a room service menu from her DH. And he has to do one set of injections for her because she can't stand the sight of the needles

She also told me quite a funny story from her last appt when they gave her all the drugs and showed her how it all works
She was fine until they showed her the pessaries, at which point she burst into tears
The nurse looked a bit and said all the tears start when they see the needles. She'd never have anyone get through that bit ok and then sob when they saw the little capsule, especially in light of what will be coming out of that general area in 9 months time

Evening all!

How are we all today?

barking glad you have managed to get out and get some fresh air. I bet you just wanna fast forward a month or so.

Yay rum keeping fingers crossed for you!

spare I have felt all out of sorts this week too, assume its AF on her way combined with the weather change, so so cold here in the south west!

Ooo, rum that's so soon! How exciting!

I've had headache and nausea all afternoon and fell asleep on the sofa (until the dog started barking) and missed the end of Marple. Struggling to decide whether it's linked to going for a walk and I'm pushing it, or just coincidence. Still planning on going to work tomorrow as I won't be in the classroom anyway.

Sid even I know that your 7dpo today
Rum great news on your FC appointment and having your dildocam virginity taken (that sounds so wrong )
Barking I am like you and incredibly impatient. I have to force myself to think one day at a time but I know it's not easy. It';s just sometimes things can feel insurmountable if I don't break them down into manageable chunks iyswim. So well done for getting through another horrible day x

TMI question - spotting, what do you count as spotting? Yesterday I had some pink when I wiped first thing but not much else all day and today not much either, a tiny bit of brown when wiping.

Nice conversation for dinner time lol

Oo bunny

barking good work on going steady today. I know what you mean about feeling impatient too. I was exactly the same. And still am to be honest.

rum you're funny! Good news on your appt though.

sid sorry you've not been on top form lately. I think sometimes we just reach capacity with ttc taking up every waking thought, and so are not on top of things so much. Although you do have merk to do it for you! Good that there's positivity in there too!

Bunny I would count that as spotting. But if its different to your normal spotting I would also count it as a symptom

Behave you two!!!

Where = nudge

Haha, spare, that is funny, and too true. A whole (tiny) person is rather bigger than a pessary! I approve very much of her being a patient style, though.

Why thank you, merk.

Bunny I'd count that as spotting. How many dpo are you, by the way? Just innocently enquiring...

Thanks, Thunder! Laughing at myself is the only way to keep sane through all this, I find.

thunder official testing day! Fc were very specific about not doing it before even though i did and they still booked my scan anyway

Well line was darker today so phew! Still feels like a dream!

barking a good walk and talk sounds good. Be kind to yourself and mr b x

Yes bunny do tell us more!

Sorry it's taken me so long to come back on here and apologise to thunder for drawing so much attention to her special wee; I've been off sourcing stockists who can bottle the stuff up for us to pass around! sorry thunder couldn't resist!

rum exciting news on the forthcoming ivf. Fingers crossed for you.

I agree wholeheartedly on the try to relax comments too. I've been made to feel by fc that I'm the one causing the issues through not relaxing enough; no the high fsh, low progesterone isn't the issue it's me not being relaxed of course!

sid sorry to read you're feeling off. Hope it passes soon for you.

barking I know you mention you're off back to work tomorrow but see how you feel and take it easy. Don't push yourself too much.

rum you are as bad as that naughty pair in the corner!!!

It is blatantly pre-AF spotting, had tummy ache today too!
For those of you dreaming on my behalf, today is CD31, +opk on days 17 and 18 (4days later than usual)

Yay to the darker line kitty

pimp when is AF due?

Have you not pimped bunny? I was spotting for 5 days before my useless bfp. I got my bfp on cd32 .

yorkie I'm really torn. Part of me wants to take another week off, the other part wants to get the 'going back to work' thing over with. I got really tearful earlier just thinking about it and I think the longer I leave it the more the fear will build up. I'm only part time at the moment so I would be going in tomorrow but not again until Monday and Tuesday, then I'd get Wednesday off again.

seriously after 2 1/4 years I was convinced it wouldn't happen! If it happened for me, it can happen for the rest of you!

rum tmi but this last month I actually had more dildo cams and speculums (x 5) than dh's penis (x 1)!!! How romantic!!!

bunny is af due tomorrow then? I think we need to get thunder to pee on your pessimism!

Oo yes yes! I can do that!

No no no you aren't taking me to the dark side!!!

(Based on ov being 4 days late, expect AF Friday)

Soooooooo who else is due soon, surely there must be somebody else to take the heat off me?!?

Ooooooo go on Bunny do it! Seen as I'm out of pimping action at the moment I need to live vicariously through you lot!