Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

The Elderberry Pavlovas skipping down the yellow brick road of positivity, thread 13 - lucky for some?!?

997 replies

Bunnygirlie · 09/08/2013 23:35

The smallprint - Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 3+months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot) and def no mention of baby dust or baby dancing UGH !!! Ooh we are strict...please note your house may be at risk if you do not keep up repayments lol

OP posts:
Original poster
Bunnygirlie · 27/08/2013 08:22

How are you merk?

OP posts:
Original poster
Bunnygirlie · 27/08/2013 08:22

Hey funky or is it monk?

OP posts:
CatsCantFlyFast · 27/08/2013 08:48

I'm good, a bit bleurgh and could sleep for a month but its getting easier. Looking forward to you all joining us in the helicopter, tho with hols and back to work I'm struggling to keep up with who is where!

SidneyBristow · 27/08/2013 09:01

Hey all,
How is everyone? Back from the in-laws' over here, and AF is leaving the building. Once again have to rave about the mooncup - once you get the hang of it, it really does make having a period so much easier. FC appt one week from today, and still haven't sorted my outfit Wink! Not really sure either if I want DH to join me. Do they do a consultation as a couple, or is it as part of the exam, where you're in there by yourself with or without any bottoms on? Really dreading it.

Blind and pip fx very tightly for you that this is your cycle x

What's new with anyone else? Funky I hope your getting outed didn't create any problems!!

CatsCantFlyFast · 27/08/2013 09:11

Sid I'd recommend taking OH with you. I would guess they'll either ask you to strip behind a screen or in another room and give you a gown. Wouldn't expect the consultation/talking part to be done when you're not fully clothed.
Is this private appointment or NHS?

barkingtreefrog · 27/08/2013 09:23

sid definitely take DH with you. I doubt very much they'd do any examinations with him present but if it's a consultation as well I imagine they'd want to speak to both of you. I'm assuming this is private? Only because when we had our FC appointment it was made very clear on tHe letter that if either of us couldn't make it we should make another appointment. At the second appointment I had the dildocam but I went in for that by myself and the consultation appointment for both of us was half an hour later.

SidneyBristow · 27/08/2013 10:46

It's private; I was referred to an NHS FC but the appt was initially set for end of Jan 2014, then last week was moved to mid-Dec 2013. The NHS can't offer us anything other than testing anyway, as DH has children, so no NHS IVF for us. It's maddening, but in our case since I'm 38, time is an issue and it's probably best for us to get a move on.

I think the thing worrying me about bringing DH there is that I dread getting bad news with him sitting right there. I think it would make me more emotional and if I were alone, I'd be more able to hold myself together til I left the office and then could have a big cry in private. It sounds pretty ridiculous but that's how I feel, but in the end I"m sure I'll have him come with me bc by then I"ll have swung back to not wanting to go through it alone.

After the shock of getting that less-than-glowing AMH result (which I now understand is probably par for the course for an old hag like me), I feel like we've been idiots to wait til cycle 14 to start investigations and am really expecting to get some harsh news at the appointment. Kind of resigned myself to IVF anyway but would rather do it bc we want to be parents soon, as opposed to having to do it bc it's the only way.

CatsCantFlyFast · 27/08/2013 10:52

Sid I understand where you're coming from but I think your DH needs to understand the process and the explanations and have the opportunity to ask questions. And don't assume it will be bad news!
Remember this is only positive whatever they find... Bad news would be if they found nothing as you potentially could end up with no explanation as to why you're not pregnant, whereas it could be as simple as something they find and fix easily allowing you to be up diffed in months!!

RevoltingPeasant · 27/08/2013 11:07

Oooh Sid that is harsh, to be feeling like that. I think it is probably best to just keep things as open as possible, though, no? I mean, they will be used to seeing people upset - but FX you won't have any need to be!

Saw the GP this morning who said that if we haven't hit the jackpot in 6 mos' time we can be referred for basic tests and then potentially assisted conception. Yipee!! Was afraid I'd have to fight for that.

The PeasantBall is now rolling, at least.

RevoltingPeasant · 27/08/2013 11:13

Also, dim Q: when you are charting temps, does it absolutely have to be at the same time each day? Because I have been doing it lying in bed before I get up but what with being on holiday, getting up time has been all over the place. Then my BBT has been all weird, going from 36.14 at lowest to 36.5ish at highest. This doesn't obviously correlate with OV either, although it did rise around when I think I OV last month.

Is this because I need to do it at the same time every day or does this mean I am a weirdo?

Confused
CatsCantFlyFast · 27/08/2013 12:14

RP it is supposed to be the same time every day however I have taken mine in many different time zones an provided I had had 4 hours sleep prior to taking it it seemed to work. However travel etc can cock up your sleep patterns so your varied temps are most likely that. I used to have occasional cycles where my temps were all over the place for no reason too! Post a link if you want us to have a nosy look

sparechange · 27/08/2013 13:06

Hi everyone!
You've all had busy weekends. Mine was a little more of a sedate affair, especially when the witch turned up oh, 2 days early. Grrrr.

Mr Change looked really Sad as well, and I hate that my stupid body being rubbish is breaking his heart. Roll on FC appt in October!

So after my buzzkill, what did everyone do for their weekend?

cherrycoconut · 27/08/2013 13:48

Sid I'd say definitely take DH with you - you're in this together and he needs to hear it too, warts and all. I've been in subsequently for dildo cams and bloods on my own but when it's a consultation we always go as a couple. I can see where you're coming from but this is definitely about the both of you. It's also helped me stop feeling guilty about not being able to provide, yada yada.

If nothing else we also find we both remember different bits so it's good to run through it all together afterwards. Although its just a 'bit of a chat' I always find, however calm I think I feel that I come out a bit drained and a bit confuzzled with the emotion and the information overload.

cherrycoconut · 27/08/2013 13:49

Merkin are you still temping through pregnancy?

CatsCantFlyFast · 27/08/2013 15:00

Nope, I have not temped or pimped for weeks Shock

SidneyBristow · 27/08/2013 16:20

Spare I know the feeling, am struggling myself with feeling less than fertile, even if my brain knows it isn't my fault, or even if there's a problem at all, other than just taking eons longer than I'd ever expected it would. Sorry AF got you.

OK ladies I will bow to the collective wisdom and do the consultation with DH. The issue is entirely mine; I'm sensitive as a rule but TTC-issues have made me even more prone to getting upset and I just feel like it could be more than I could bear, having to sit through hearing difficult news alongside my poor husband who has been nothing but patient and supportive this whole time. (actually just reread that and it's sinking in how silly I'm being, so consider me convinced!).

Original poster
Bunnygirlie · 27/08/2013 19:51

Merk glad you are doing well Smile can't see myself joining you in the Berry-copter anytime soon, isn't it full anyway?!? Lol

Ooh sid FC appt! Ours is coming up too, ooh it's 3 weeks today Shock our NHS is for both of us so DH will def be there to hold my hand, I'd def take yours if I was you?

RP yay to the ball rolling!

spare balls to AF Sad

OP posts:
RevoltingPeasant · 27/08/2013 20:42

Merkin thanks - but my temps were weird before we went away!

I think my body s just broken and doesn't want to make a baby....

Thank goodness my lovely GP seems willing to help!

Boodle9 · 27/08/2013 20:51

Evening all! RP, when you are temping, it is best to do it at the same time every day, and also for it to be an alarm wake-up rather than a natural wake-up. The reason for this is that your temperature will be affected by the waking up process and will be starting to shift for a fair few minutes before you actually wake up. Generally, there will still be a pattern but I've always found my clearest charts to come from regular alarm wakings.

With regards to men-folk in the consultations, it's definitely worth it. Mine listened and took everything in and asked questions that I wanted to ask but couldn't as I was all 'lump in throat ready to cry'. I know you've already decided you will go together anyway, Sid, but just thought I'd fling in my belated tuppence worth.

Arrrrrgh. My ovaries are hurting today. I think they're going to explode again!

BlindKitty · 27/08/2013 20:52

What? The copter is full??? Damn it, I was going for that bfp this month and all yeh right

funky lovin the name change! It makes talking about cm a whole lot easier haha!

sid not long now. Do think you should take Dh with you. 1) because they might want to ask him questions 2) it's a second pair of ears 3) you'll feel more confident and united (well I did). Also, after 25 months of 'unexplained infertility' I can't tell you how liberating having a diagnosis is! Don't be afraid of the unknown, it might just resolve everything Smile

spare is this your first appointment?

BlindKitty · 27/08/2013 20:55

rp defo need to do it at the same time. Mine was all over the place when I went to Thailand! Presuming I'll get my rise tomorrow as had my trigger yesterday.

boodle we're in sync atm though yeh? You must be about the ovulate? If they're really painful you might have ohss???? Any abdo swelling?

Gillster · 27/08/2013 20:59

Evening all! Sorry AF got you early Spare. I'm currently still in the running but expecting AF tomorrow/Thurs. anyone watching the midwife programme at 9pm on BBC2?

I have a question. My boss' wife has just had a baby. I get on well with him and they were both guests at our wedding last year which was the only time I have met his wife. They bought us a nice wedding present so should I buy a separate new baby present or just chuck some money in the inevitable work collection?

Good luck tomorrow Kitty and hope you're getting through the TWW OK Pip.

BlindKitty · 27/08/2013 21:16

gill I'd get her something desperate, doesn't need to be expensive.

Yes, I'm watching tormenting myself with midwives. Makes it 10 times worse that its at the same hospital where I'm having my fertility treatment (and of course my subsequent baby!)

Original poster
Bunnygirlie · 27/08/2013 21:21

boodle your poor ovaries!

kitty I'm sure there is room on the berry-ferry! Nervous about tomorrow? Wishing you lots of luck.

What is a desperate gift?!? Wink

pip how you doing? How's the 2ww?

OP posts:
Gillster · 27/08/2013 21:22

Something "desperate" Kitty? Last weeks programme is probably where I'll end up if we go down the IVF route.

Swipe left for the next trending thread