Fabulous Fecund Over Forties TTC: fertile,prolific,fruitful and productive. Hand over the bfp's and hand them over now!!

[hopefulgum]

Starting the new thread for you wonderful ladies before I fly off into the sunset.

May this thread bring us the happy news we've all been waiting for.

diege how awful!!!
Are you ok now????

jbrd ((hugs)) xxxx

We just returned from a holiday ( what do you call a romantic getaway before baby arrives??)
It was great!!!
29 weeks today and finally believing that it is going to happen. My dh is happy as always and we are decorating the nursery and buying few things ( had hand me downs for other dcs but all our friends had their kids a while ago?).
The gestational diabetes is coming along nicely however as I plan the baby shower ( different custom in my country) I am making plans for yummies that are nice to eat and not necessarily healthy!!!. Baby shower is a big celebration for us and in my case people was asked to bring nappies or wipes ( cheap and easy to find). ..
Sorry to rant away

hopeful my dh as a teacher in London, Leeds, Birmingham and now Manchester.... I asked him over brekkie and he say that Yorkshire was the best area regarding behaviour, but he works with hard of hearing now so it is difficult to judge.
All my love to you in your path of acceptance... Xxx

Ooh Gum we have very good schools in Warrington . Seriously though, wherever you choose, if you do come, I will hint you out and stalk you until you agree to come over for a large piece of lemon drizzle cake. Would it def be England or would you consider Wales/Scotland too?
notsoold 29 weeks here too - I also feel quite relieved when I pass 28 weeks. Howe are you feeling with the GD? Would you have known you had it if it hadn't been diagnosed?
Tiger do you have any idea when you might have ovulated? Very stressful testing and retesting in your position xx
Have to head back to day unit for anti-D today. Dh being quite 'off' about covering childcare for an hr or 2 as I don't fancy trekking there with 5 kids. He has the option of going into work early so won't get behind (flexi time) but at the moment is asleep...Am putting it down to the general stress he has been under at work/mum poorly etc, but his current mood (swings) at present have been quite 'challenging' shall we say...

diege I wouldn't know as the other symptoms ( weeing in the might and drinking a lot and feeling tired) is what happens to me anyway during pg!!! So they swear I had with ds because of him being 9'9 ( although so skinny being tall)....

Good day to all xxxx

did any of you here have pregnancy symptoms identical to AF symptoms???.. I will have AF in one week and I already feel ovarian dullness, which happens to me every month.. Am I already out then?
It's a terrible week as it's just one year from when they started to detect problems with my baby.. I want at least to keep my hopes up for a few days!!
humh I'm afraid I'm biasing your replies..
Diege sorry for you accident and for your DH behaviour.. mine shouted at me yesterday because I was crying remembering last year events.. I sometimes wonder if we're the right people to be together..
gum if you go to the uk to teach, don't forget to come to Italy!!!
Jbrd how are you? Lots of hugs...

mozz I've never felt more like my period was going to come than when pregnant, certainly no reason to think you're out. Know what you mean re: dh - we are very different people I think which doesn't usually matter too much, but when under stress etc does create quite a difficult living environment. My life would be so much easier with Simon Cowell

notsoold that's interesting about the GD, also that your ds was one cause for concern with his weight - same here with dc4 who was 9.8 after 3 7 pounders. Reassuringly back to 7.12ib with dc 5 though so hoping this one will be similar.

mozzamummy, yesterday must have been one of those days. I had a good cry in the shower for my little Louie and Alfie who never made it earthside. I have always believed our babies find their way to us, but I feel sad thinking that this little spirit baby is unlikely to come back to us. But I don't even discuss it with my Dh because he just doesn't feel it as keenly as I do. My losses are tiny compared to yours, so you must be heartbroken. ((hugs)) I hope this is your month for a bfp. And if it isn't, don't give up, I am sure you will get pregnant.

I am also on another over 40's forum on an American site and there have been many successes. The latest one is a mum who is 46 and 6 weeks pregnant, and she has a 14 month old son. So that gives me hope. I have my fingers crossed that her pregnancy will be a success, because as well as it being a wonderful outcome for her, it can help me believe that it is possible.

I have considered buying Zita West supplements. Does anyone else have experience with them? Do you think they are worth it? In the past I have always taken a handful of different supplements, so I like the idea of just one or two that will cover everything I might need for ttc. Or is it just tarted up vitamins that I could get somewhere else? I will have to wait until I sell some stuff on EBay to be able to afford it, and I should probably be using the money to help pay off the holiday spending but I feel I should give it my best shot...Am I just being silly???

Thanks for the suggestions for places in the UK to teach. At the moment it is really a dream, but one we have talked about for years, and 2015 might be a good time because it is when our eldest DD has finished high school and DD2 will be year 10 which isn't a crucial year in her education (where year 11 and 12 is), and DS will be year 1. Otherwise we have to wait til DD2 is finished (2018). Anyway, I was reading through the application forms yesterday and it is quite a complicated process and it appears it is difficult to get a "couples" exchange, and we couldn't afford to do it unless we were both working. The truth is we probably can't really afford to do it at all, it will be expensive to fly four of us half way across the world, and of course we'd want to explore Europe, so it could be a big expense. But the more I think about it the more excited I am. Mozza, we would definitely come to Italy as my father owns a house in Monte di Procida (his childhood home), in the south, so we would have a house to stay in.

Diege, we would have to apply for Scotland and Wales too to give us a good chance.

Like I said, at this stage it is a bit of a dream, and honestly, as much as I have always hoped we would do it, a THB would trump that dream in a heartbeat.

It is Saturday here and my DD2 has a friend sleeping over, so I am taking them and DD1 into town for shopping ( the horror, the horror!). I think I may have to find a friend to have a cuppa with. I would like to have cake too, but so far I've lost NO weight on the 5:2 diet, so I am wondering if I have to be strict on non-fast days too. I thought the whole idea of this diet was that you didn't have to worry on the non fast days, but so far I haven't lost an ounce. Grr! I hope all this starving isn't for nothing

If you are reading this when you get up, have a happy Saturday...

Well, I'm definitely not upduffed. Oh well, next month.

I'll enjoy my child-free weekend by going on walkies through the woods and maybe cocktails later. So it has it's perks.

Sorry Tigerseye. The walking through the woods, and cocktails sound fabulous, but I'll send a little ((hug))your way because it would be nice to get a bfp.

Hi everyone, been reading and hoping for good things for you.

Gum - I am sorry this wasn't your month. I think even though it feels long, you have every reason to keep going if you want to. I've known two women have babies naturally older than you - one at 47 and one at 50 (Her first)! I can understand the sadness of your losses and the feeling that maybe it is time to stop too. I am taking dhea and q10. Q10 seems to be a bit of a wonder supplement for ageing but it is really expensive yes. I got mine from amazon cos these kind of things are extortionate in France. How lovely to have the travel idea there. You never know, you might just find it happens. I wanted a change years ago and here I am!

Mozzarella - I had AF symptoms when I got pregnant so I hope that is a good sign for you. It can't be easy to move on from a tfmr but keep the faith, there's still time.

Tigerseye - enjoy your weekend and the freedom you feel.

Diege - that tennis ball incident sounds horrible. Glad you're ok.

Morien - congratulations on your wedding and delighted pregnancy going well. I can't remember if you had your harmony result yet. Hope all's well.

Cali - huge congrats on the weight loss, that's fab. Hope dh is impressed - cant be long till he's back?

Sparkly - wow, not long now! It goes really fast when it's not me doing it so it seems to have flown. Best of everything for the next bit. Hope dh comes good and supports you.

Notsoold - delighted it is going well.

JBrd - hope you're doing ok?

Big hello to Irish and everyone else.

Afm I am unfortunately in a pickle. I had an inconclusive smear result and have to wait for my doc to get back from hols on 3 September when I have an apt booked. I was ok with it, but have started to feel a rising sense of panic over the last week. It is hard work being mum to a two year old, I adore it but it can be exhausting. She is great but quite a character. She just hit me on the head with a book so I have banished her to the playpen to calm down! I am 4 days po - don't feel pregnant but do feel very emotional which is not like me. I am frightened things might be really bad and terrified of what it could mean if they are. Better shake myself and take us into town.

Hello everyone, hope you're all having a lovely weekend. I just had a message from the doctor at the Fetal Medical Centre Belgium to tell me that he's had my Harmony results last night and they're absolutely fine. I imagine I'll find out more on Monday, but I'm so pleased to hear that

[isadorable] that's happened to me too in the past - an inconclusive smear, I mean. In fact I went back for a second one and it was inconclusive again, so then I really did get worried I know it's hard not to think the worst (particularly when you've got such a long wait till you can have it done again, you poor thing - couldn't you go somewhere else?) but the doctor told me that in most cases inconclusives just mean that they can't test the sample, not that there's anything wrong. Mine was fine, in the end.

Mozzarella I'm quite confident that my DH & I should be together (anything else would be a bit sad, wouldn't it, a week into our marriage?) but he could very easily behave in the way your DP did. With my grandma's recent final illness and death recently he was just rubbish. It's almost like there's a sensor in him that detects more-than-average neediness in me and freaks out - whereas normally he's very supportive. Anyway, how are you feeling now? A hard few weeks for you to get through.

And gum, have you brightened up? That sadness can hit right out of the blue, can't it?

tigerseye sorry it's not your month, but enjoy your cocktails - please have one for me

Have a lovely weekend, everybody else!

Great ne.ws morien! How nice to get a head's up at the weekend too
isadorable please don't worry about your smear result, it really will be that there were either not enough cells on the slide or it was 'impaired' in some way (for eg. a touch of thrush, other bacteria/blood). My BIL works in the labs here and has been called upon many times for interpretations of smears! If there was anything slightly abnormal they would upgrade it to 'mild abnormalities' which in and of themselves often clear up anyway after 3 mths. Really, DO NOT WORRY!!!
Gum I have used the Zita West supplements in the past after I'd had a mmc. I read her book about fertility and she mentioned her own supplements which seemed a lot simpler than buying them separately. No problems with them (in fact conceived a few mths after taking them). Only problem is price and remembering to take them 3 times a day...I think you're quite used to supplements though? so may well have it in your mind to take to work etc.
Sorry it's not your month tiger . Are you going/do you chart, do opks etc? I found temping really useful in letting me know when to expect af/a bfp, but can also see the benefit of just waiting it out.
Hope everyone's ok and having a good Saturday. Dh (who seems to have perked up ) has taken older dds swimming so am trying to attack the washing/ironing pile with limited success...

Thanks diege and morien - great news about harmony too. My result is Ascus - it seems I have traces of hpv 16 and 18 which are the ones to worry about. Instead of worrying, I am drinking a mojito in the big square with dd who is drawing all over my physio receipt with her new babapapa felt tips. Oh and eyeing up my mojito cos it looks more interesting than her iced tea which she usually loves.

Men don't cope and deal with things the same. Mine is very practiical and only secretly very emotional. Though we do support and compliment each other most of the time, it can be tough. But I think it is worth it and know I am happy to have him.

Have lovely weekends all!

isadorable I too have tested positive for the same strains of hpv that you do (apparently 90% of the population are hpv positive) and every single smear this year at the hosp' clinic has apparently been hpv pos (they're part of a research study). It just means they might invite you for more frequent smears (I have yearly ones) but the virus can burn out if you are healthy and fit, and may well be untraceable for every other smear you ever have xx

Thanks diege that is really helpful and reassuring. I am encouraged that I have no symptoms and he took me it looked ok when he did it. My dp is delighted to hear a rational explanation. Men.

Hello lovely ladies.

Morien, congratultions on the great Harmony result. Fantastic news.

Isadorable, I also have those kind of results and all is well. I just get checked 12 monthly. The last one was fine I think and now I can wait two years.

As for men, I second what you are saying. I love my DH dearly, but he has the emotional aptitude of a gnat. I have learned, after 13 years of marriage, that it is just his "normal" and not to take it too personally. However going through the miscarriages was the hardest thing I have ever done because I felt I had to cope alone. He was there for me but just couldn't grasp the emotional magnitude of it.

Diege, I went and ordered the Zita West supplements yesterday but for some reason my credit card wouldn't work . Then I posted on Mumsnet, hoping someone might have a discount code I could use, but no replies to my post as yet. I'll wait a couple of days, and see if I can get a code before I purchase(they are quite expensive, but I like the idea of not having to take such a large handful of vitamins and sups).

Isadorable, I think you are right, there's no reason to stop ttc, and I don't think I'll ever use contraception, but I might stop charting, temping, timing intercourse, taking supplements. So, although I wouldn't be TTA, I wouldn't be consciously TTC. I do believe it is still possible, as I am still having regular periods, but I do accept that having a regular cycle doesn't mean that the eggs are viable. However I am sure there is one good one left in there somewhere.

One of the things Zita West says is that couples don't have enough sex. In my case she is probably right. Busy lives, kids and age have all put a big dent in my libido. It takes effort to make it happen My acupuncturist said that being open to a baby at my age is a type of freedom, not having to think about contraception as many women our age do because the idea of a child to them is the worst thing ever. So, I suppose that is a type of freedom.

I'm rambling!

My parents are visiting today, so I am cooking a big roast lamb lunch, so that's my Sunday taken care of. I will have to clean the house first (sadly, they are quite critical). I feel tired just thinking about it....

Good morning from me, too, ladies. It's lovely to come to this thread and read how you are all getting on.

I also had an abnormal smear test a few years ago, but all that amounted to was having tests more frequently for a few years, and nothing else was found. It's quite surprising how often that seems to happen...

Great news about your harmony test, Morien, what a relief! How are you feeling?

I'm hanging in, nothing else I can do at the moment. My next scan is on Tuesday, and I guess they will discuss options with me then. I started spotting yesterday, but it's very light. I have a sinking feeling that this is going to be a long and drawn out affair, sigh.
I'm a bit in denial, trying to get on with things as usual and surprising myself how well that is going at the moment. I've been to work all week, just getting on with it really...
However, I got the letter inviting me for the 12week scan yesterday, that was really tough

Thanks JBrd - I am beginning to see these things must be quite common - thanks to all of you. It isn't the sort of thing people talk about much I suppose. But I'm grateful for knowledge. I'm off next week so going to see my gp about a few things and I'll mention it and see what he says.

Sorry things have yet to resolve themselves. Good thing you're in a job you like now and can take refuge in work I suppose. Are you to look at recurrent miscarriage testing? How rough to get the scan letter... Big squeeze from me.

Gum - I know we're not having enough sex! Was going to try sme plan. I think between dp's shift work, dd and all the rubbish this year has thrown at us so far, we've not been trying hard enough. From what I read dhea should be effective after 90 days. That's the longest i plan to take it for. I have been taking 25mg for a couple of weeks without any side-effects so I think I'm going up it to 50 next week and see how that goes.

Happy Sunday everyone!

Jbrd poor you receiving a letter like that! I received one regarding scan after my mc last year and it broke my heart even more! Take care my lovely!! Xx

Gum...none of my friends in our age bracket is every enough sex because of all the many things in our lives! So I totally get it! How was the roast lamb?? ( sex x food??? I choose food :))

I hope you are all having a pleasant weekend. We are very quiet here because ds went away to a camp...he is a chatterbox!!

Hi everyone!
I went to doctors and had blood test as advised re bleeding, fingers crossed its stopped as from today, been almost a month now, so just awaiting results.
I'm also overdue for a smear test, i remember having one a few months before i conceived my youngest, sadly not here anymore, and i had to have a colposcopy. I was advised not to get pregnant, but I did, infact it regulated my periods afterwards. So i need to book in asap while not bleeding. Its all very worrying isadorable
Well tonight might be dh lucky night, no bleeding all day lol!

Hi ladies.
Jbrd, receiving that letter is like a kick in the gut isn't it? After my second miscarriage I had called and cancelled my 12 week tests, but I still got a reminder phone call at 11 weeks. I told them that it was pretty awful that they had called me when I had miscarried. I hope they felt bad because something like that shouldn't happen. It is an awful reminder of the loss. I hope it all resolves quickly for you. Will you have recurrent miscarriage testing?

mumalah, I am glad to hear the bleeding has stopped. I hope you get to the bottom of what's going on. Not only would it be worrying, but also inconvenient.

My Sunday worked out okay, but I was exhausted by the end of it. Dh cooked the lamb and vegies in the Weber BBQ, so I didn't have to do much - just make a big salad. But of course I ended up cleaning the bathroom, kitchen,living room and laundry. Seems mad now as my parents were only here for a few hours. But I know they have "reported" back to my sister about my house in the past, and I have to admit to feeling a bit hurt. I wish I didn't care what they think. For goodness sake I am 46 years old!

I have had no response at all about the Zita West discount code, so it looks like I might be paying full price . I would have thought someone would have responded...oh well.

DS has woken with a sticky eye this morning. I hope it isn't conjunctivitis. He has swimming lessons this morning and will be heart broken if he can't go. I shall keep an eye on it

Have a lovely day.

Morning! That sounds very annoying about your parents gum..I think I would be tempted to leave the place in a real mess (so basically as it is...) and see what gets back to sister...Re: Zita West, I have never found a discount code in all the time I was taking them, on MN or elsewhere. Hope ds's eye sorts itself - conjunctivitis is the pits
mumalah that does sound a pain about the bleeding. Do you know when you might get the results back?
All ok here - have the prospect of taking 4dcs into town to get school uniform today; that should be fun May need to indulge in something sweet (am thinking M&S's cream meringues) when I get home!
Love to all - btw I think we should resume the bistro on Friday - get thinking what you'd like so I can order supplies

btw Gum wasn't inferring your house was a 'real mess', was thinking of mine

Oh Diege, right now a cream meringue sounds amazing (fasting again today. Wish I was up the duff so I had a great excuse to stop it!). I know you weren't being critical of my house. But it is a mess, which is perfectly normal for a busy working family. My mother never worked outside the home, so she hasn't got a clue.

I wish I didn't care. I met up with my parents and my sister for a cuppa this morning after DS's swimming lesson. Was a waste of time I think as they are just so strange and difficult. They are very critical of my sister and the way she disciplines her children, and yet they are not at all interested in helping out. They very seldom visit us, have very little time for our kids, but then proceed to tell my sister that my children are "precocious" (because they can uphold a conversation with an adult), and that DS is "very spoilt and gets his own way all the time", after they have spent about two hours with him and us. It makes my blood boil that they can make these assumptions when they don't even know the kids, nor us, really. Nor do they seem to want to. Honestly I don't know of any other woman on the planet who is as negative or critical as my mother...

Luckily the visits are few and far between, so I can relax for another 4-6 months. They are going overseas in two weeks, which makes both my sister and me relieved as we know they won't surprise us with a visit whilst they are away.

Sorry for the rant - they just make me feel

About the Zita West sups, I have tried to buy them but for some reason my mastercard won't work, which means I will have to use my visa card, which I share with DH. Will the statement say "fertility supplements"? I wouldn't want DH see that I've spent that much on them, he'll not be pleased. So still not sure if I will go ahead. There were no replies to my post about a discount code, perhaps there is no such thing nowadays?

Oh, I think I will probably buy them. I am still willing to give it a good shot. I bought some opk's today. DH is going away at the end of the week, so I want to have an idea of what's going on, as it could be a bit tight for fitting in SWI.

Off to see if I can find out what will show up on the credit card statement