Fabulous Fecund Over Forties TTC: fertile,prolific,fruitful and productive. Hand over the bfp's and hand them over now!!

[hopefulgum]

Starting the new thread for you wonderful ladies before I fly off into the sunset.

May this thread bring us the happy news we've all been waiting for.

Me, Hopeful. But I did test yesterday, then started spotting. Of course no flow today, so am currently resisting testing again. And all this with only dtd once last cycle, on CD 6. I am trying to take it in a relaxed way, but who am I kidding? I am going to relax when in menopause. But I am not doing the drugs anymore, I will let my body to decide whether it can or can not do this. On plus side, I have been spending the last few weeks alone with my 8 and 4 yo sons, which has made me wonder whether I am up to a baby at all;-)

Thank you, looking forward to hearing more of your stories. Gosh, your poor nephew and your poor sister, what a lot to deal with.

What an emotional time for your sister Gum, I hope your nephew gets the support he needs.

I am at the same stage as you. I had huge backache yesterday and then AF was most definitely in the building. I am counting it as starting then, I am pretty sure now that I am spotting before this point as there is a definite sudden change in flow. Previously I have been counting the heavy spotting as AF, but reading on here makes me think otherwise? This gives me a LP of 10 days. Hope I'm not manipulating the figures!

HorseyGirl sorry for your losses, wishing you lots of good luck with ttc.

Hello everyone

It's been a while since I posted - trying to get my head straight after my MMC but I have been dipping in and out to check on how you have all been getting on. I struggled for a while but have dusted myself down.

jbrd I am so very sorry for your loss - I was totally gutted for you. How are you doing?

I have been so thrilled to read the fabulous news on the thread blossoming bumps - congratulations and you give us all hope . I await news of the arrival ofsparklyjunior with bated breath. Good luck!

Sorry to all those who have been having such a rough time.

I have only just got my period back after my ERPC in June. I had a transvaginal scan in late July which showed that my body had tried to ovulate once from my left ovary but this failed and turned into a functional cyst and then I had tried from my right ovary and this failed and also turned into a functional cyst. Great. So I was all ready to ovulate but the LH surge just didn't happen for some reason. Finally, I ovulated on CD67 (temping really is the business for tracking ovulation) and my period came 12 days after that (and a very nasty one it was too . Anyway, i am glad that i finally ovulated and my period came - feels like i can now move on. The irony of the scan is that it clearly showed that my right ovary was more than active and I had been told that my right ovary was small and inactive!!

So back to previous plan that DP and I have decided to go for IVF given our ages and we have spoken to the clinic about next steps. They are happy for us to start next cycle which is quicker that I thought but there is no reason to wait. They didn't even seem that concerned about my rubbish AMH (1.3) given my previous regular ovulation, good FSH tests and ability to conceive naturally (and the fact that we are paying for it So I am ladies, once more, back in the fray.... Will be giving it our all this month as well just in case we manage to conceive just before starting treatment again!

Ps. Welcome to all those who have joined whilst i have been away.
I am 44 TTC #1 with DP for about 12 months. Conceived naturally in April13 MMC at 10 weeks.2 Dsc's. Starting IVF October 2013.

Yay, greenlizard, so good to see you back! I've been thinking about you. Keeping everything crossed for you

Hi Greenlizard, It is so nice to hear from you. It is fabulous news that you will be starting IVF in October. That must make you feel you have something positive happening towards having a baby. I hope you won't need it and have a BFP this time, but at least you know that option is there.

Ogden, as far as I know with charting, spotting is never considered the start of AF. It is when there is a "flow",light,medium or heavy that it is considered AF. I am not really sure if your heavy spotting would be considered "light flow" or just spotting?

If you have an LP of 10 days, have you considered having your day 21 progesterone level checked? It is an easy blood test, which should be done 7 days post ovulation (rather than day 21, which is based on every doctor believing every woman ovulates on day 14). It will tell you if your progesterone is low (which will cause spotting and short luteal phase). I don't think 10 days is too short, but from what I have heard and read over the years, it is better if it is 12 or more. Having said that, many women have gotten pregnant with short LP's. Also Vitamin B complex is supposed to help too.

Sorry that AF found you. I am pretty sure she'll be knocking on my door today or tomorrow. I have the heavy feeling and sore lower back. Bugger! I still hoped to be surprised by a late BFP. Blah!

Nice to hear from you Jass. Have you tested again? I know, juggling the kids on your own isn't easy. I feel the same way when my DH is away, but I think if there was a baby too, we'd probably function just fine even with all the sleep deprivation

I have woken up feeling hot and puffy. My wedding ring which is usually very loose is tight and uncomfortable. I wonder if it is water retention because AF is coming? I don't usually notice this. But I also have a headache, so perhaps it is something else going on? Is this what perimenopause is like?

We had a lovely Father's day. The roast lamb at lunch was a big hit, PIL loved it. My FIL looks awful, with terrible puffy,red wounds from the operation on his face. He spent most of the afternoon sleeping. He starts radiation therapy in two weeks. Both he and MIL seem very pessimistic about the outlook, which I am struggling to understand because the cancer is not in anywhere else in his body, nor has the facial melanoma spread into the nerves or anything. I know they couldn't get all of it in the operation (hence the radiation therapy) but I am surprised at how negative they both are about his prognosis. Also, they are both very forgetful and muddled, so I am not sure they are getting everything straight that the doctor tells them.My DH has offered to go to the doctors with them, to take notes and remember everything for them, but they forget to tell DH about the appointments!

Fortunately the visit didn't leave my DH feeling depressed, he was still in a good mood after they left and we took a nice long walk on the beach with DS. Whilst there I remembered taking a long walk before we embarked on having DS - about 6 years ago, before my DH had his vasectomy reversal, and DH telling me he really didn't like the idea of another baby, but would do it for me. Seeing them together on the beach yesterday, playing and laughing made me so happy that we embarked on the journey despite his reservations.

Today DS and I are going swimming. DS just loves it, I can only get him out of the pool with chocolate Terrible parenting, I know, but it works!

How are you feeling Diege? Drop in and tell us all about your holiday.

Have a lovely Monday,everyone. And have one of these for me. It is fast day again....

Hi greenlizard, how nice to hear from you, I have been thinking of you.
Looks like it'll be induction in the morning, so hoping it won't be too long and drawn out like last time. I'll update when I can, and thank you all for your support over the last few months, it's been invaluable.

sparkly Good luck for today, will be checking for news of arrival of sparkly baby!

green Hello! Glad to hear from you again, I've been wondering how you are. And it sounds as if you have a plan to go forward, that is so great. Fingers crossed and good luck for your journey to the IVF shores

Welcome horsey! Sorry to hear about your losses, what an ordeal you have been through. Fingers crossed it'll be smooth sailing this time.

First day back at work after 2 weeks off for me today - and I'm struggling more than expected. Feeling very emotional, not sure why - I was fine all weekend. We had a lovely day out at a maze and children's activity area yesterday, it was great fun (apart from DS being stung by a wasp). But today I'm tired and worn out. Wondering if there are still residual hormones hanging around in my body... Planning to test later this week. The EPU said to get in touch as soon as I get a BFN again, so that they can initiate the next steps for the tests.
My lovely childminder, who is also a good friend, wrote to me on Friday, saying that she's pregnant. From the sounds of it, we would have been due within weeks of each other. I found that a really hard blow, probably due to the timing. Of course, I wrote back all smiles and congratulations, but I was actually crying when I hit 'Send'. I really do want a break from everyone announcing being pg or havin babies around me, but that would mean to cut myself off from everything, so not really an option

Sorry for not name-checking more, will catch properly with everyone else later!

JBrd, sorry for the coincidence with the childminder's pregnancy. It an be really hard. And about hormones - mine are so totally messed up that I am now borderline anxiety syndrome, I think. Very nervous about trivial things and tears over everything. I think it must be hormones - I used to be quite calm. Hope yours will settle soon and you get some simple answer for your losses. Simple answers exist and hopefully your will get one of these. Unexplained is he worst place to be

Hello! Finally surfacing from holiday washing/back at work stuff and can post. Jbrd that does sound hard - I can't even start to understand how you must be feeling with all that has gone on/is going on. As jass says, I really hope that there's a relatively simple reason for your mcs and that you have some supportive medical people that can help x
Welcome to the newbies, and welcome back to some familiar names from the past - good to catch up and see how things are going - there's a lot going on here at the moment!
Gum phew sounds quite eventful with your sister and her family. How are they handling the gender thing with ds? I ask because I run some sessions with adults who have been through the same thing as teenagers and come and tell our (social work) students about their experiences. Seems that how the 'coming out' is received (long term) has big effects on subsequent adjustments etc. Hopefully everyone can work through it positively together. On the supplements front, I remember the green wee too I too was reassured that it meant they were 'doing something' though my gp spoilt it somewhat by saying wee colours like that when body doesn't always need the dosage . Still, I took them until I became to poor to continue and did actually conceive 3 mths after starting them.
Sparkly I too am awaiting your birth announcement - I will sound a snug fanfare for you a la kate middleton when we get the news!
I know I have missed out loads but I am absolutely whacked and there seems to have been so many things going on. I am still getting over the 'holiday' tbh, which was fun but very full-on and rested is not something I'm feeling...Still, back at work this week so should at least get some sort of rest then. Schools back Wednesday, with ds1 (4) starting reception - bloody staggered starts/odd finish times a nightmare - ending up having to take a good chunk of annual leave just to get him sorted. Still, just 4 weeks until maternity leave kicks in (33 tomorrow).
Love to all xxx

Oh my goodness, Diege, you're 33 weeks? How on earth did that happen so fast??? I hope you do get a chance to rest soon. You really should get some rest before number 6 arrives. As for the staggered times etc for DS(1), I totally sympathise. It is so hard to juggle it all isn't it?
When my DS started Kindy this year (is "kindergarten (for 4 year olds) the same as reception in the UK? Or is reception the year they turn 5, which we call Pre-primary?) I had an awful time juggling his needs and my job. We got him onto the little local school bus very quickly, which means I can drop him with the bus driver at 8 am, and get myself to work on time. As it was, I wasn't supposed to leave him at Kindy til 8:45, and yet that's when my own classes started, 10 minutes away from his school. The stuff of nightmares!!

Jbrd, my heart goes out to you. Gosh, how bloody difficult to have your child-miner having a baby around when you would have. It really does hurt. I know exactly how you feel. After my second miscarriage I just wanted to stay away from everyone, I couldn't bear to hear about everyone else happy news, whether it was their second cousin twice removed or someone I knew personally, it just felt like everyone could have a baby, but not me. I know right now it is still very raw for you, but please be reassured that time will make a difference. I am amazed that I was able to sit at dinner with 39 weeks pregnant friend of a friend and not feel sad for myself or extremely jealous. I was happy for her, and hopeful for me.

As for the hormones, mine took a reasonable length of time to settle. After the second miscarriage (which was around 9 weeks) it took about 67 days before I ovulated again, and in the meantime my hormones where all over the place. Be gentle on yourself

Looking forward to Sparkly's news.

Hi Gum . Reception here is basically first year of full-time school so starts at age 4. They are also doing staggered 'finishes' at dd3's junior school so her year are coming out earlier for a week. Great in principle but if you have a child at primary and junior (7-11 here) you can't make it in time, which sort of defeats the whole rationale behind making things easier for the teachers children. Have decided nothing quite beats the convenience of nursery hrs 8-6 Sounds like things are similar in Australia re: working parents too - agree, not great for stress levels!
Hope things are progressing/baby sparkly is here!
Off to do morning baths today to get them out of the way for the dcs - why did I leave all the homework/bag packing/lost PE kit stresses until today? On a gross note (and thankfully not typical) dd2 has opened her school bag and found some maggots in there . Just what I need to be greeted with!

Hellloooooooo.....
Crikey its been busy on here...I have a lot of catching up to do.
First of all welcome to all the newbies.

Good luck to those awaiting their due dates.

Jbrd you have had such a tough year, do take care of yourself.
Gum I feel so much of what you write..you express that pull between your rational and hoping mind so very well.

I'm sorry for not namechecking everybody, I have a fair amount of catching up to do.

As for me...well I am now resident in NIreland, and very lovely it is too.
As far as ttc is concerned I had solid smiley on CB dual sticks 3 weeks ago(which I have to say I thought was odd as no other signs of ovulation. Anyway, 3 days later I tried another stick out of curiosity and still got a smiley (for those who dont know, once you get a solid smiley with these sticks it stays solid for 2 whole days so you cant keep testing). Anyway I was rewarded with high temps following this for about a week then back to pre ov temps. I have mildly tender breasts (which I only get before af is due) but its been nearly 3 weeks since I supposedly ovulated. Of course all BFN. Raaaa. I guess af will arrive in her own sweet time.
DH seems to be very nonchalant about the whole thing. He has gone from being very for intervention to "lets just have sex and if it happens it happens" attitude. Hmmmmmm. I suspect he wants to take the pressure off me, however I'm not quite sure he "gets" the time factor involved.
My consultants appointment back in England has been deferred from September to November. I have 2 cycles worth of clomid left...then I may be reduced to getting it online. It seems to be the only thing that makes me ovulate and in the absence of DH's support for intervention of any other kind (actually any kind which costs money!!)it may be my only chance.
I love where I have moved to...I have a beautiful beach minutes from my back door and beautiful scenery surrounding me. I do find living on camp however is very geared up to young families with children.
I hope to be able to drop in a little more often from now on so I must have a good read and catch up xx

By now your little one should have arrived Sparkly! Hope everything went well,as gum says ,looking forward to hearing your news!

gum it sounds like you're having a tough time with so much going on with your family, I hope your DN gets through this difficult period of change and your sister finds some happiness too. Your DH must find it traumatic with his Dad being ill, at least they all have you supporting them!

Nice to see you back Green ,I've been wondering how you were. It is good having the ivf to aim for, hopefully though you'll find you don't need it.

Welcome back from your holiday Diege . It is hectic getting everyone back to school, especially when they start reception with a week of mornings/week of afternoon before they start properly! How does your DS feel about starting school?Are his big sisters at the same school?

Hope everything is progressing with the fostering application Willitbe!

Welcome to all the new people!(Sorry not to namecheck everyone).

How was your first day back at work JBrd ? It's such a difficult,emotional time. I'm glad you didn't need a hospital stay though and that you can soon have some investigations.I found the tiredness and emotional slumps came and went for quite a few weeks after each miscarriage, don't expect too much of yourself xx

I know how difficult it is hearing of other pregnancies too and I debated about whether I should start posting again so I really hope you don't think I'm being insensitive but I wanted to share with all of you that I'm about 6 weeks pregnant. I know we were supposed to be giving up ttc, I've not been charting and have tried to switch off from it all and focus on all the positives in my life but we obviously were a bit lax with contraception! DH has been brilliant, he's very calm and says maybe this is our time to have a little miracle. I know my chances of miscarrying are very high. DH says if the worst happens, we've been through it before and will cope again,what will be will be, so we're trying not to think too far ahead and take it a day at a time(who am I kidding, I'm a nervous wreck, analysing every twinge !) I have a scan at the EPU next Monday when I should be just over 7 weeks so I'm just hoping and praying this little bean makes it.

Hi CaliBee,crossed posts! Glad the move to NI went well and you're enjoying the time with DH.

Hello! I'm a newbie. Great to meet so many amazing over 40's. Good luck to you all - loads of it. Am 41 and ttc number 2. DS took more than a year. He is gorgeous and our lives have been soo changed. I'm 41 1/2 and hoping to get lucky again. Hoping not to get my knickers in such a twist as last time too!! Have not started charting again just using clearblue monitor and trying to dtd aplenty. Bye for now

Welcome always, you've come to the right place!
calibee NI and the beach at your doorstep sounds gorgeous. Are you actually in forces property? My sister was for years and found both pluses and minuses, though located in not half as nice a place as you. It must be good to be settled at last, and with dh 'at hand' so to speak. Hopefully your Nov appointment can shed more light on whether you need further intervention x
Irish wow I am so pleased for you . I know it is such a rocky road you're on, but this IS good news and it sounds like dh is also being very supportive. I really really hope your scan next week is good news and you can start to believe all will be well xx Re: ds and school, he does seem very young in my eyes to start - he can't even wipe his own bottom yet and I just can't see how he will be able to get changed for PE/queue up for dinner etc etc. Dds are in other schools (they split primary here across 2 sites) but he has his best friend in the same class which will help a lot.
Need to 'label' school uniforms now. With dd1 it was preordered M&S embroidered sew on labels, with dd 2 iron on 'write your own name' ones, dd3 had laundry pen to write on back of clothes' label, and poor ds1 is awaiting the finding of a biro that works to scrawl initials on .

Sorry not to have been around for a while, I have been travelling a bit with little signal. Having a bad day today, very tearful. Due at work in half an hour but don't want to go.

Have my pre-op for my lap n dye in 2 days and I think that has triggered sadness etc. feel like I want to hibernate.

I started a thread, don't know what to tell my employer. Don't really want to ring my manager wailing, but don't know how to explain my odd behaviour either :-(

Haven't caught up yet, hope everyone is ok.

Irish, that is such good news! I am sending sticky, THB vibes your wayIt is not insensitive to tell us your good news, we all need to hear the good news, it is so important.

Calibee, it is great to hear you are settled in N.I. It sounds lovely. I am also sending preggy vibes to you. I'd love for you and your lovely DH to have a baby together. I think using the clomid is a good idea. Can you see a Doctor in NI to get a script?

Hello, alwaysontop, this is a wonderful group of supportive ladies to hang out with whilst waiting for a bfp and analysing the whole process!

Tigerseye, I am sorry things are tough for you right now. I think telling your manager that you need "compassionate leave" but don't want to discuss details should be enough.

Well, strange things happening here. I am 13 dpo and usually have AF by now, but sometimes I do have a 13 or rarely a 14 day LP. But weirdly, this morning I had spotting, but not the usual brown, it was proper red blood. I thought it must be the start of AF, but there was nothing, at all, for the rest of today, and still nothing. I also have had a funny taste in my mouth, but my breast tenderness is gone, and I am just having a a few funny twinges instead. My temperature has dropped a bit, but isn't below cover line. I didn't bother testing yesterday or today as I thought for sure it was all over.

I hate to say it, I feel a bit hopeful. I guess if RTD (AF) isn't here in the morning, I will test again, but it does seem quite late to get a bfp, and I worry that would mean a late implanter and not a good chance of a THB. I guess I shouldn't get ahead of myself should I?

Thanks Hopeful, and fingers crossed for you!!! Never say never!!!

I have taken a half day off and made myself eggy bread in the hope that I can achieve the same fertility as my chickens!!!

Irish That is wonderful news! Sending lots of sticky vibes your way, fingers crossed for your scan! So so happy and please for you Please don't think you're insensitive, on the contrary, happy news needs to be shared. And if not here, where then?!

tiger Could you email your manager? I did that when I had my recent mc, to let her know what was going on. I specifically stated that I needed to let her know by email because I would not be able to talk about it in person right now, and she was completely understanding and so helpful. I know that you're not obliged to tell work about your situation, but I found that it really helps if at least the manager knows.

cali Your new home location sounds idyllic! I'd love to have a beach close to my house... How are you settling in, will it be easy to meet people?
Your DH sounds a bit like mine, i.e. leaving all the ttc 'knowledge' to me and letting me 'steer'... I think that next time, I'll try and spread the responsibility a bit, I find it very lonely to be the one in charge.

I tested last night, and 11 days after my mc, I had a BFN. At least everthing appears to go back to normal fairly quickly! Now I need to call the EPU to get the ball rolling for all the tests and investigations. Fingers crossed that it won't take too long (but it's the NHS we're talking about, so I don't hold out much hope there...)

Irish - wow, I am so pleased for you. I will be sending lots of positive vibes your way. Waiting to see about my smear - doc running v late. I can't really reply in detail so hello to all those I know and welcome to those I don't.

JBrd that's what I did, I couldn't trust myself not to cry on the phone. I think it's pmt, coupled with stress plus hospital plus talking to a very pregnant friend. Just too much.

He politely replied back 'ok thanks'. Man of few words!

I'm seeing patients this evening and am feeling a bit better.

Hope your body is 'back to normal' now and you can find a way forward.

Good morning ladies.
No good news here I am afraid - no AF, but another BFN. I console myself that it can take 3-4 days post implantation to get a bfp, so maybe that's what's going on. I still have funny tingles and aches in my boobs(but not the usual tenderness).And my temperature, though not below cover-line, isn't very high.

My realistic self says that AF is just around the corner, be patient and stop being hopeful.

And my pessimistic self says - that spot of blood was your AF (gasp ), you are old and menopausal and you should just pack it all in.

So, yeah, I am taking the relaxed approach to ttc

Is there such a thing? Maybe if you are comatose....

P.S. FOR GOD"S SAKE UNIVERSE, just give me my long awaited for bfp and THB!!!

...argh!...