The Elderberry Gluckschmerzers who sausage wang between the Sofa of Pity and the Pouffe of Possibility (thread 11)

[Bunnygirlie]

Come and join us elderly TTCers on the Sofa of Pity (SoP), Rug of Rage (RoR), the Pouffe of Possibility (PoP) or the Chaise Lounge of Limbo (CLoL) whilst trying to avoid the BubbleBath of Gloom(BoG)!
 
The smallprint - Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 3+months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot) and def no mention of baby dust or baby dancing UGH !!! Ooh we are strict...please note your house may be at risk if you do not keep up repayments lol

[SidneyBristow]

The mind boggles at giving a child a punchline name like North West. Those people are seriously from another planet.

FF moved my cover line to one that wasn't so surrounded by shagging am hoping it's a mistake based on wonky temp values since I never take it at the same time in the morning. This time my "intercourse analysis" (vomming smilie goes here) is giving me an orange dot "high" instead of the green dot "high" I had previously. Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!

Nice to see ya goosey!

What's on tap for everyone today?

[Foodylicious]

Hi Guys
been feeling pretty pants, lots of things going over and over in my head. Can't stop thinking about what should be going for me know if I had not mc. I know its only been 3 1/2 weeks, but god this is awful. Ok if I keep busy, but mostly I just want to stay in bed.
Had finally decided to tell my other sister about it yesterday when we met for shopping and lunch but really could not get a word in. She is maybe being made redundant soon so was talking about that.Alot. We went for coffee before meeting our other sister (who has one 3 year old and one 2-3 month old and knows all about it) and everytime I took a deep breath and started to say something like "this is diffucult.." she cut me off thinking I was talking about her. I seriously started at least 5 sentences like this and gave up as i was now shaking and would not have been able to keep it together If I did manage to tell her and would not be able to manage her response either.
Nightmare. I have not told her or my folks because I dont want them fussing or focusing on it or our ttc in the future, but I know she really would want to know and may be hurt I have kept it from her as I have seen her quite a bit in the last few weeks. I must be some actress for her not to notice something is wrong! though she is very wrapped up in herself and she is what I would call naturaly selfish in that she genuinely does not consider other people all that much. Not deliberatley or anything, just the way she is wired.
My other sister and I are really close too and she has been great, it is about a year since her mc so still quite raw for her but she was fortunate and got pg strait after and like I said now has a 10 week old (lovely and hard for me all at once).

Sorry ranting!!!! maybe I should come on here a bit more often, but I'm just so negative at the moment and don't want to bring others down.


On the up-side NOT

Have had a couple of exercise related disasters this week, perhaps someone is trying to tell me something???
Am signed up for a 10 k run tomorrow
have been doing 30 day shred and hurt my right leg doing it on Sunday went for a run on Monday as wanted to get a few good runs in before the 10k - had to stop after 20 minutes and walk back. Ouch.
So decided to be sensible and rest it completely until saturday.
Yesterday put up my new chin-up bar and used it in the evening thinking 'great can exercise without using my legs!'
On chin-up No6 the bar fell down causing me to land all my weight on my left leg before becoming a heap on the floor. Ouch!!!!
Seriously not impressed and super annoyed with myself as am now not going to be able to do the run with my sister tomorrow, hoping will at least be able to walk it. Godd thing I am not working today either as I am limping around the house!

So today is sitting on the sofa trying not to cry or go look at the scan from 6 weeks. I have the maternity pack and stuff from the early scans and the +test, I just don't know what to do with them. Need to pack up that room anyway as I am planning to sand the wooden ceiling before priming and painting it as I have a few days off work.

Glum, glum glum, sorry guys
Oh and dont know how we will ever concieve in the future as can't get my head round DTD again, made myself once last week (i wanted too and i didnt all at once) was ok but burst into tears afterwards thinking about all we had lost.

It does help coming on here reading your stories of what you have been up to!

[Bunnygirlie]

Ello seriously girl, mine the RoR!

Oh Foody I cannot imagine what you are going through, to be given the golden ticket and then having it cruelly ripped off you weeks later doesn't bear thinking about. Sound like your sister is wrapped up in her only little world with no room for your news, perhaps try again in a few days?
(Completely off subject - Be very careful with those chin up bars, a girl I went to school with tried to do a backwards roll on hers and it fell down and she landed on her neck, you can imagine the rest.)
Sending big hugs, I'm sure in time you will feel like DTD again. Have some and or

Any exciting plans for the weekend?

[barkingtreefrog]

foody I can't imagine what you're going through and have no advice on what to do with the scan stuff, but with telling your sister would it help to tell the sister-in-the-know that you're trying to tell the other sister, and do it while they're both there? That way when you take a breath and try and start your sentence the sister-in-the-know can step in and tell the other sister to shut up help get your message across.

[Thundercatsarego]

Sorry bunny I just felt all passionate and Mediterranean doing that.

foody you know how sorry I am for your shitty time from my pm. With regard the sister that doesn't listen what about just getting the other sister to tell her. If I were me I'd seriously consider texting but I'm cowardly vet non confrontational like that and prefer to receive news in writing myself- it gives me time to arrange my features appropriately especially when it's new pregnancy news GRR

[Thundercatsarego]

'S a bit quiet in ere innit?

[Bunnygirlie]

Woah there thunder

[Thundercatsarego]

S'alright bunny, still got my socks on

Jenga?

[Thundercatsarego]

🐆

[Bunnygirlie]

Lol at least wait till I've gone to the pub! Off out for a glass of wine or 5! Laters peeps!

[Thundercatsarego]

Enjoy!

[MrsB00Mbastic]

Ooooh, naked Jenga! My fave Can I leave my hat on?

Hi goosey good to see ya!

Kitty don't worry, I'm not really trying to get cut price drugs off you! I shall be bullying the doctor into giving me the legit version next Monday as part of my positivity drive..!

Foody so sorry you're having such a crap time. Your sister does sound like she's very focussed on herself. If you do want to tell her, maybe you could text her to say you have something you really need to talk to her about and could she meet you for a chat? That would make sure her attention was focussed so you're not trying to slip it in in the middle of a conversation about her.

I still have my scans, even the last one that showed no heartbeat, and the photo of the pg test that I sent DH to tell him. I can't bear to get rid of them, for some reason I feel like I need to revisit them every so often to prove to myself that it really did happen. That sounds really maudlin I know, but I can understand why you're finding it so hard to let go. Maybe you can put them somewhere out of the way so you're not constantly drawn to them?

In other news, I'm back on community placement. I can deal with the big bumps, but I've had a couple of new bookings today and I honestly nearly cried. Just seeing those women all excited about their new pregnancy was so hard, and they kept asking if I had kids... Also it's the first time I've seen my mentor since first year, and she knew about the mc so I had to deal with the sympathy (I'm not a gracious sympathy receiver. I just cry lots). I don't know, I just feel like they've shot through my defences today. It's going to be a really hard couple of months now. Just as well I've got a day off from it tomorrow!

[Pipbin]

So AF did show today and I called the clinic and thats IVF all started!

I get started on the drugs in 3 weeks and then it all happens about 6 weeks after that!

[Thundercatsarego]

That's so strange boom, I emptied a bin from a room we barely use today. In the bottom was my positive pg test. It floored me. I was offered my no heartbeat scan photo but I didn't want it. Funny how we cope so differently with these things.

Sorry it's been a tough one with the mentor and excited newbies. That must be so hard. I can't imagine. Do you have a 'professional mask' or is it a real struggle?

pip, that is SO exciting! Thank god to get moving with it! How's the house? I was thinking about your story of creation the other day. It was such genius I reckon you should post it again. Please? I need a smile today

[Pipbin]

I'd forgotten all about the creation story. Is there a why I can see all my past posts to find it again?

[Thundercatsarego]

Did you not write it anywhere else? Otherwise you might have to search through old threads- not sure...

[Pipbin]

Found it,

Ladies please take your seats as the sermon as passed down from generation to generation of berries is about to begin......................

[Pipbin]

In the beginning Mumsnet created the TTC forum and saw that is was good. But many of the threads were full of women complaining that they had not been blessed with their 4th baby. And Lo many women who were evil and greedy for having delayed having babies so they could live fabulous lives and have holidays (and nothing to be with being financially stable and being with the right partner) and they were made sad by the women who already had babies.
And they went into the wilderness and walked for 40 days and 40 nights until they came to the promised land of elderberries and sausages. And they saw that it was good.

And Lo those women did pee upon the stick of OPK and saw that there were two lines and held it to the light and did say unto their fellow elderberries 'tell me oh wise women, is the test line darker than the control line?' And the wise women said that it was and they must make haste to their bed and the elderberries did call unto their husbands and ask for him to lay with her and he said, 'but I have been busy at work and I'm too tired.' And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth.

And the elderberries did go to the wise GP and speak to him but he didn't understand but sent the woman to have tests on the wrong day. And the woman did say unto her husband 'you must spill your seed into this pot and a man will look at it and see if it is good' and the man said that he was too busy and tired. And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth.

And the woman looked at her fellow women and they all doth say 'but I laid with a man but once and I have had many babies' and another said 'I think thou doth triest too much. If thou stop trying it will happen'. And the women were evil and they thought not for the feelings of the elderberries and they doth call upon their friends to bring them gifts as they were very pleased with themselves for having a baby and could not understand why the elderberries find it so difficult.

And lo the elderberry did find herself reading the scripture of the internet and did do everything asked of her by the soothsayers therein. She did eat manuka honey, she did pee on sticks, she did put a pillow under her bottom, she did not partake of the caffeine or the alcohol, she did put the legs into the air after she had lain with her husband but each month she was visited by an evil spirit. And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth.

Our peestick
Who art in the bathroom cupboard
Clearblue is thy name,
Thy peeing on done,
Thy one line only come,
This month as every other,
Give us every other day strength to DTD
Forgive us complaining
As we forgive those who give us advice,
And lead us not to read the internet
And deliver us of a baby (eventually)
For thine is the CBFM
The opk and the conceive plus,
Until we get two lines
Amen.

[Thundercatsarego]

Sobbing with laughter. pip you are fucking amazing. Sorry for the language but it has to be said.

[happylass]

Yey Pip great news about getting started with the IVF - thrilled for you! Had forgotten about the creation story - love it! Hugs to all the Berries having a tough time.
Zero to report here. Somewhere in the middle of the 2ww and have pretty much given up hope of getting upduffed this year. Actually looking forward to taking a break from TTC. Think it'll do us good not to be constantly thinking about it!

[MrsB00Mbastic]

BWAHAHAHAHA pip that is pure gold! I even read it with my 'serious vicar' mind-voice for extra effect. You've cheered up a grumpy berry!

Oh and massive yays for the IVF! Go team Pip!

[Thundercatsarego]

Anyone watching Miranda? 'My ovaries work -yippee' ha!

[Bunnygirlie]

I'm here!!!!!!and I'm tipsy!!!

[Thundercatsarego]

Bloody Nora bunny you drunk those 5 a bit quick!

[SidneyBristow]

Pip you're genius, if you don't mind I'm going to cut & paste it to refer back to when I need to see the brighter side of TTC'ing! Fantastic news about your upcoming IVF, so psyched for you!! New house really does lead to new baby! note to self find buyer for house overseas so we can upgrade here before I'm old and decrepit

boom and foody and thunder can't even imagine how I'd cope with what you've all bravely faced; I'm really sorry you've had to go through this. The only person I know IRL who's had a mc (and talked about it) said that she felt herself getting pulled into a depression she wasn't sure she could've found her way out of, and the only thing that helped was returning to her (extremely demanding) job so she had less time to think about it. In the end, the only thing that brought peace to her was conceiving her eldest child, who couldn't have been conceived had her first pregnancy gone to term. People grieve differently, and I think there's no right or wrong way to deal with it. Foody I'm sorry your sister was so hard to talk to. I think a text might be a good thing, as just a heads-up to her that you had something important to discuss. I'm glad your other sister is being supportive and I agree about the chin-up bar, they sound dangerous!!