We will try anything! The big fat posifrickintivity thread of TTC after MC

[GuffSmuggler]

A new thread for all you lovely, crazy ladies. Here's to lots of BFPs!

Oh and kata I hope your dh is up to the job poor thing. Although maybe he should nick a syringe from the hospital just in case

Oh Rainbow that is really shit! Sending you lots of {{ hugs}}

Oh sal that's shit This whole rollercoaster of TTC is so rubbish and didn't you DTD 9 days in a row or something!? There's no hope for any of us!!

Sorry you are back here rainbow that is absolutely shit too I hope you are looking after yourself.

katatonic I thought I was bad making my DH DTD when he had bad stomach ache last cycle, but a dislocated knee, poor chap! Needs must though, tell him just to er 'soldier on'.

So I'm feeling a bit better today, so perhaps I had some phantom PG feelings - grrrr for feeling well!?

Rainbow That is really sad news. Once is bad enough.........

I think I'll need to order in a job lot of preg tests!

Hi all, been lurking a bit but due to DHs job situation (or no job as the case may be) we are Not Trying this month. Or at least we are continuing to DTD as usual but are telling ourselves we are Not Trying.
Had loads of EWC today but negative OPK so not sure whats going on, due to ovulate tuesday/wednesday. Not sure if we will avoid DTD for a few days or not.

So sorry to hear the sad news from Rainbow and Over, life is truly shitty. Hope you are both feeling well and taking care of yourselves.

I keep thinking I am fine but then get a bit drunk and get tearful. Situation is shit cause I desperately want to keep TTC but the work situation and worry over money is a problem. Have seen no less than 2 pregnant women in the last weekend and two newborns, plus a load on FB. Also seen people we hadn't seen in ages who are asking if we are having another etc etc. In my head I am going 'aargh' and outwardly it's well, yes, hopefully, blah, blah...

Hope everyone else is well. I am off to drink Prosecco too. In the bath, with DH. Still Not Trying though..!

Pah!! I did have a temp of over 102 degrees though, so hardly surprising but very bloody annoying....

Can I nominate myself for a medal?
Ive just done 4 12 hour market days have a bad back, am exhausted and have still managed to DTD 3 times! I think that's pretty dedicated!

Now, if I can just work out a way to end up NOT sleeping on the squishy patch, I'd be totally content!

Morning all.
Seems we've had a mixed bag of results over the last few days, congrats to rockchick- it really does help when we get a bfp on here, think it gives the rest of us some hope that it could be us next time!

Welcome but 'sorry you are here' to newbies.

Feeling really low today, after crying most of the night in a pathetic sort of mini-breakdown that I'm getting pains ahead of af which is due Friday! I guess it's not going to be my turn this time around, which st least means I can drink on my hollibobs but still makes me really sad. Had my mc in march and didn't think it would take this long to be pg again!! Grrrr.

Me either Sun! I keep working out how many weeks PG I would have been and getting depressed. It will be awful if my due date arrives and Im still not PG.

Wow saggy YES you definitely get a big shiny gold medal engraved with the words "DTD Through Adversity".

Katatonic will also get one if she managed it with her DH's dislocated knee!!

Sorry you are feeling crappy missmake I think the Not Trying but Not Not Trying approach sounds like a good solution for now.

Sundance I also MC'd in March and feel like I should be upduffed by now, it's so hard to keep positive with each month that passes isn't it? Have a good cry and get back on the horse when you feel better. IT WILL HAPPEN.

I feel a bit sick this morning

Thanks for understanding - I knew you would.

Doesn't help when people come out with comments like "are you pregnant again yet?" - quite possibly the most awkward question to answer.

Keeping fingers crossed for you Guff - are you going to POAS today?

And Penguin and Sal, fear not, I'm also heading up the number of northerners on here! :)

No holding out on POAS as AF due today/tomorrow. Will see how long I last.

I also had someone at a toddler group say 'Are you PG again yet?' 3 WEEKS after my MC and still bleeding from the ERPC. Truly I have seen the best and the worst of people through this experience. Just say you won't be discussing it with anyone, that's how I reply now.

Really really keeping everything crossed for you then Guff - hopefully the next few days will fly by with no show from the old witch, though I don't think I could wait out until Friday to POAS if it were me. You're so patient! :)

So moving onwards and upwards....has anyone had any experience with the thermometer thingummybob? Think that may have to be my next port of call...project deperate is well and truly on the cards.

My DH has just taken accupuncture for an old knee injury and had some great success with it, has anyone tried it for fertility issues yet? Where do they put the needles??

Sundance its crap when people say things like that! I go for the shaming them into submission approach. "No. I'm still devestated from the miscarriage" or something equally blunt. I like to embarrass or shock them. Maybe they will think twice next time!
My mum caught it a while back. She keeps on about the menopause and how she hopes I won't be one of those women for whom it is the end of the world! I lost the plot and told her "no, but I'm only 38 and trying to have a baby so PLEASE just shut the hell up"!
I'm not the type of person to keep quiet and suck it up,and the direct approach definitely works! There is nothing more satisfying than seeing someone mortified!

wow saggy good effort. Actually, AMAZING effort.

sundance i'm sorry you're feeling crap. I went through the same last week (mc in feb, extra erpc in march)..... This week i'm less upset but feeling like giving up instead. I ordered a bbt thermometer last week and it has just arrived with a whole bunch of ov sticks too. But I could hardly even be bothered to open the packet: I just don't know if I feel like trying.
I'm sure this is a passing phase and by the end of the week I'll be back to manic "we must have sex NOW because i'm ovulating" mode.

missmakes I like the Not Trying approach. Seems sensible. I really hope your DH gets a new job pronto.

guff i've got fingers and toes crossed for you!!!!!! Try and hold out until the day after AF due Friday. I was pretty pissed off when AF started the day after I POASed. Feeling a bit sick is a good sign.

I was chatting to the 20 yr old receptionist at work and she asked if we had decided to not have children (I'm 35yrs not fricking 55yrs), I just said "I've had two miscarriages actually so its not as been as easy for us", thinking that would shut her up, she then went on to tell me that we "should relax and it would happen"......

I replied (in my most lovely friendly patronising voice):
"Darling, you'll understand when you're a little but older that relaxing isn't really what gets you pregnant. You actually need to work out when you're ovulating so that you can time intercourse so the sperm fertilises the egg. How wonderful it would be if we just need to have a little relax to get pregnant!, Thank you for your advice though."

Stupid little bimbo.

Oh Sundance what a ridiculous question. People are so odd and insensitive. I'm contemplating acupuncture this month... Wondering if it might help relax me too.

Over.... I'm so sorry for what's happened. It's just such a horrible thing to have go go through. I'm so amazed by how brave and stoical you are. It's v inspiring.

Back from a few days in Wales walking. Operation shag starts now. Think we are going for every other day for 14 days on advice of the doctor. But trying to land dtd on day of ovulation. Oh the maths. SMEP didn't work last month and just made us tired and stressed. So here goes. Hope everyone else doing ok.

Rockchick - great news for you. So pleased.

Ps Sal - great response.
'just relax and it will happen' is the most irritating piece of advice in this whole process. I makes me want to be v rude to the person who bestows this insight.

Sorry to hear about all your awful times, people really do not think at times!
But sal I may take the bimbos approach and not doing anything but relax and when I am pregnant I will call him Jesus the miracle child!!! What a stupid wench!!
Grrrrrr grrrrrrr grrrrrrr
Something tells me I am suffering a little rage today
However guff I have everything crossed for you!
Been to gp with my rage today I think they wished I hadn't! However they are now going to refer me for exploration for my heavy periods and my 3 mcs! Also I am booked back in to see Bourn clinic on a private basis but I neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed a baby just like you ladies so I would rather keep to our small home and have an old banger as feel happiness would be money well spent!!
So now off to buy Tins of beans for the month!
Trump trump trump sorry maybe the beans!
I appear to have lost the plot
Xxx

Sal - haha, I will definitely give that a try next time, and I'm sure there will be a next time. My DH's best mate is a rather bullish, straight talking type and he's coming for a visit at the weekend, he always asks me if I'm "Up the duff yet"...though I've warned the dh that there will be trouble this time if he asks again.

I'm becoming too obsessive today, no doubt because of my meltdown last night, but have been looking into the rules of IVF etc this morning. I know I'm being irrational but can't help it. I'll be 32 this year and don't have any children yet so feel like we really need to get a crack on.

Stupid receptionist!
I'd have replied "there! That's the answer! And there was me worried about scarring in my tubes, early menopause, not ovulating and DP being infertile! Where did you say you studied reproductive medicine?" And made a face like this:

Pull yourself together woman!

Abundance, I am a year older but have been blessed with dd 5 years ago, I tried 3 years for her. Have you been togp ? I know that in our area Norfolk you receive 3 Ivf attempts on nhs if neither yourself or dh have children of your own. I do believe at 31 you need to have been trying 6-12 with no miscarriages in that time either as sadly this is classed as a pregnancy
We do not qualify for Ivf on nhs as I am blessed with dd however my dp has no blood related child ( although the best daddy in the world might I add) so this is why we are in a position to dictate when where what time frame bla bla bla but at a hefty old cost.
If you can get in waiting list my personal opinion is do sooner rather than later as rules and regulations on this seem to change all the time!

Good luck with your choice , we are all here to support you xxx

Abundance? I mean sun dance blooming phone x

Well... The 2WW starts here. I'm about to drag my lazy carcass out of bed and face up to the world. Here's hoping for AF to fuck the fuck off....