FAO all BESH - SNF for those who frequently CBATM and occasionally SADAW after G&T. LOLs and BD will not be tolerated. IDs will WTP.

[CaptainMoll]

AYBESAAH? DYHIDWAP? DBDMYV? CYLTEPPC? DYLG? TTITFFY!

Anyone who can correctly translate the above messages wins a baybee.

(Or at the very least, the respect of the BESH).

WIBU to say to my SIL "Oh fuck off and learn some fucking manners you charmless cow," every time she phones (about once every six weeks) and says "Hello it's SIL, can I speak to MrHest."
No "Hello Hester, how are you, haven't spoken for ages, how's it going, how's your dad, how's the fertility treatment going...?" or any of the 101 things nice normal people ask after their brother has been with his partner for the best part of fourteen years .

Get caller display and don't answer when she calls, the mardy cow.

Good plan. Actually this time, I made her ring back on the mobile as we have a really bad landline, and when it rang, I passed it straight to him. He can extract conversation out of his sister if he likes - I can't be bothered.

I don't know about tums too much Bugger, but milk is alkaline so it sounds good. How about nice natural yoghurt too in your mouth not on yer foof.

I have to change the object of my lesbian crush by the way. Quite clearly the proud recipient of my esteem has got to be Cerys Matthews.

I used to love Cerys when I was at uni. International Velvet is one of the best albums ever too. Don't think I would now though.

Mind you, at this very second even Jean Luc Picard couldn't tempt me. I am feeling Sad for no reason; I sobbed for 5 minutes because a minor character in a programme I was half watching was lonely. It's not even PMT time. WTF is wrong with me?!

Oh Winks, come and join me in the Pit. I have the Rage - you have the Sads.

and I am actually dying of mortification as I just went on the Cerys Matthews webchat and told her I had a girl crush on her oh my god

The BESH could bankrupt that lot. Perhaps we should sign up to save the gullible? Sort of public service barrenness?

bugs glad it reached you. I figure work owes me a bit of stationery for all the weekends I work... Sorry your stomach has been bothering you.

I think she's probably used to it hest

Hest, get to a computer and listen to any of Cerys' Sunday shows from Bbc 6 music. She is completely wonderful and your ears will thank you for it. I luff her.

sadz here too, as well more wound pain than yesterday (boo) and a digestive system in revolt. Not Fair.

HestSIL sounds like a miserable twerp. Don't even bother making the effort in future, I say.

Cerys is ace, fo' sure.

Morning hags nice pit of doom you've got here. Well done on triggering and overzealous shagging hes and frank. The SIL story actually made me smile, as I have the opposte issue with my MIL. She always wants to chat to me and I desperately try to pass her on to SB. Caller display and not answering is the best way. Oh and yes, it is bull-shit. Waves and goes of in search of Cerys how did I miss did, because I live under a rock

Oh why didn't I choose Cerys as my girl crush?

I do luff her too especially as Moll says on a Sun morning. I luff her poetry slot

Hester - maybe though now if stoopid SIL did want to chit chat, you might not be up for it anyway as she has blotted her copy card? That's how I'd feel anyway, but tis still annoying that she isn't interested. At the same time I'd want her to suffer, so I'd probably just talk her through my life for half an hour anyway.

Frank- sorry too about Frank's dad. I heard on the Beeb this am that Frankel is the most successful racehorse ever. Cool.

Just found out my friend is moving to The Hague. I'm more excited than she is. Day off today so off to do errands and some writing. Hurrah.

Hope stabbing and shooting is going well for those involved. Sorry for those folks feeling .

Morning Hags. When are you in the clinic Hest?

I think I've laid, temp has bumped up this morning and I was getting twinges yesterday afternoon. HWHNN is still coming back for last-chance sechs and then it's wait for next week's blood test to confirm ov.

Thanks for all the kind words about Sir Henry. It's so strange, but everyone I've spoken feels as though they've lost someone close to them, even though most of us never met him properly. Some people just have that effect on others

I spent a couple of weeks in The Hague for work last year. It's a nice place and I think the quality of life would be pretty high. It's a little, er, dull though, but I guess Amsterdam is within easy reach.

I hope you've run round flapping your arms and making chicken noises, frank.

My SIL is a bit of an odd one. We get on ok, but we'd never chat on the phone (I hate phones anyway).

Euro- I'm just pleased because my friend is far away in Europe at the mo and is moving much closer. Plus I just really like just being in other countries (would move abroad if I could) and now I get a chance to visit even more. I like that there are beaches nearby too . . . You're right though, it might be dull to live in. Well we'll see.

My SIL is insufferable. Most if the time she fills me with rage. Then she does something nice and I feel bad. Then she'll annoy me again. You get the idea. We'd never talk on the phone. Plus I'm a phone phobe too.

Any news from Hest?

Here's an odd one for you Hags: I went to the loo earlier and in amongst the copious pant snot were a few flecks of red blood. Anyone had this around ov before? It's a first for me and I've now got visions of all of my follicles having gone pop at once

I've not had it around ov - but then I'm not completely certain that I do ovulate reliably.

Is there any possibility that you've, er, damaged yourself as a result of the enthusiastic sechsing?

It's possible Twinks, but we've not had sechs since Monday evening, so I'd have thought I'd see something before now if that were the case. It was definitely red (fresh) blood.

I'm also feeling bloated

Well in the absence of any more informed opinion, I will speculate that the drucks are making your lining nice and thick, more so than happens naturally. Therefore I suppose a bit of spotting wouldn't be totally unexpected. As ever, speak to the docs if in doubt.

norf you droiding properly yet?
hest how's it going?

I am tired and even sadder after work, assisting the ambulance with a very ill elderly man and taking care of his elderly wife :( And I don't want to drive to the hospital in rush hour traffic for a dildocamming.

I'd go with Winks's assessment, Frank.

Well, the spermz are in anyway. Let the menkulling commence

Well done Hest. What's your test date? I'm in for a blood test on 19th with instructions to POAF on 28th if no droid. I'm not going to test early like I did last time, I can't take the disappointment again.

I too am POAF on the 28th. That's 16 days post transfer.

We shall be POAF-buddies

Well done hest and MrAries. Did he cope ok with the spaffing? I remember he was unenthusiastic for the jizz test... Fingers crossed now.

frank, I'm sorry about Sir Henry. At least he saw Frankel through his glory. I would guess that the red blood was ovulation as well. I sometimes get a teeny dollop of brown gloop, but red would make more sense. Definite evidence of something anyway.

twink, that sounds very sad and like the kind of thing I would dwell on too :( At least you have the help that you could, and didn't add to their distress by failing to do your job well.

Pre-droid has totally vanished and there is no sign of anything to replace it. So, just to review the cycle:
CD14-15 : two lacklustre shags
CD 38-39 : cramping and tinting
CD 41: BFN
CD 43-51 : minging watery faint brown juice - nothing I would recognise as a droid or even fresh blood.

I guess the cramping and tinting was ovulation then, and the brown juice is a lovely luteal phase defect to add to the list of barrenosity. And droid will hit tomorrow or something.