We laugh in the face of OPKS and stomp on our thermometers! Don your customised shag capes, ladies; it's Just Shagging Thread 15

[Bearface]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share and with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce in other posters).

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

The link to Part 14 is here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1674505-Out-with-the-OPKs-ban-the-body-temping-heres-Just-Shagging-thread-14

The link to the latest grads thread is here:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1699553-Shagged-Out-Viroids-7th-Thread-From-conception-to-birth-living-proof-that-JSing-really-does-work

Happy shagging shaggers!

Cookie they are only classed as positive when you get 2 lines that are as solid as each other - you can have a low level for ages, it wouldn't be a sign of ovulation. As Quark said though they would also show up 2 lines if you were upduffed, have you done a pregnancy test to rule it out?

Commiserations Minion, though at least AF had the decency to show up in good time for you to enjoy your hols!
All sounds like pretty classic early symptoms Quark, maybe the Law of Sod has come into play to get you preggo at an annoying time!!
heads off to customise shag cape

Hi all, on phone so not a long message

I've have faint positive opk's from cd 10 now cd 15. Hmmm will do a pregnancy test in the am to check, git a leetle bit of butterflies when I read that rock

Quark still sounds positive! !

Waves at Nessa hullllo

I find the two line opks a little difficult to judge sometimes cookie but can mean pg too so worth a test in the AM! Fx for you!

Sorry, minion - bummer. up! I think I'm in your boat - saw a teeny bit of spotting tonight, which generally means she's loading her bags into the car for the jolly road trip to my dysfunctional uterus. I don't even have the heart to mention it to DH. He's so convinced that this is the month, and will get his hopes up for implantation bleeding like I used to.

Quark on the other hand is keeping us on the edge of our seats! I suppose you are sleeping as it is 10 p.m. here in the States. I will be checking for info in the morning.

cookie - intriguing!!

Hi thought I'd check in been lurking but really busy! Well my boobs are killing me! Even the slightest touch is painful.... ERTD could be due thus weekend will try to wait for at least a week if she doesn't turn up. I'm thinking overactive imagination! Hope you are all well!

Hi Nessi, i married at the beginning of March but waited a couple of months before coming off the pill, good luck and welcome!

hi all. sorry to hear about ertdness. surely this thread is well overdue a bfp. I'm feeling so much better this month for not analysing everything and it seems to have coincided with me finding my sex drive so maybe less pressure and the ridding of hormones from contraception were the way to go.

had some lovely family time over the last few weeks and hoping to take a few days off soon to do some house sorting (if I ever do get pregnant there is a lot of sorting and diying to do first!)

does anyone know how long is the average time to take to conceive? when do you go for checks? it's a bit early but just wondered!

Coffee the NHS will usually start runnin tests if no luck after TTC for a year, I think 6 months is about average for trying. This tells you a bit more details. Yay for the new happy horny hormones!

Good luck Gnome you've got far more willpower than I have, I virtually started tested from ovulation last month

Red have you started having tests or are you leaving it a bit longer? The link above is quite nice reading for us longer-term JSers.

I want a new cape! Maybe a nice girlie pink one with flowers while the weather is nice...

Quark....this sounds promising! Windyness was def a symptom for me!
Fx!

I think the checks and stuff for fertility are dependant on age. If you are over 30 it's six months and if you are under 30 it's 12 months. Not sure on the average length of time but remember reading something about there being only 20% chance each month!

Bfn

Sorry cookie - on the plus side it simply means you've not ovulated yet so just keep testing until you get 2 strong lines :) I had ages were I had a faint line, then a day where the lines were matching, then one went faint again.

Hello All

Welcome Nessa and Gnomie!

Sorry I haven't been around much but not been feeling too great this week. Have been off work today and in bed. I woke up with pains in my right hand side in the night. Ive been feeling iffy for a few days. They've reduced to a dull ache now. Think I have a beautiful UTI, but last night I thought I might have appendicitis because of where it was. Managed to suitably scare myself with the NHS Direct website. But I've been drinking cranberry juice like there's no tomorrow. Who knew it was so calorific? 130 cals per 250ml and I've drunk a litre!

Good luck the contraband Cookie. Don't give up yet. And don't despair because even if you don't ov this month that doesn't mean you don't ov at all. Everyone has the odd month when they don't ov and its perfectly normal. It's only when it happens consistently that it's a problem. Doctors just don't seem to be fans of telling anyone this.

Red- sorry to have confused you last time if I did but I meant I was game on for shagging not for a BFP. Got my fx for you though.

Quark- any further news?

Sorry to Minion and anyone else who got Ertd.

Red is right. We need a BFP. We are due a BFP. I think the last one was MrsAVB-right? How long ago was that? I see Kate Winslet is preggers again! According to the press she just wished it to happen before the end if the year and magically it happened!

Hi do you mind if I join in here?
I'm ttc on my third cycle now since mc earlier in the year. Have one DD already.
Trying contraband (Cb digi advance) for the first time this cycle and not thrilled with it at all. Reckon it missed my peak fertility completely waste of money piece of shit
Think i'll throw in the towel next month and go back to shagging when we feel like it and hoping for the best

i think humpty was just after me. You know what you need to do ladies, get some BOOB on!
We need some more of you on the grads thread... Lots are about to pop.
FX for you all.
Am 9+2, on meds now for my copious vomming.
X

Hi Alyant- welcome. I've found that sometimes the most expensive things are the least effective. I go with Internet cheapies and they do the trick for me

Hi everyone. been mia for a few days as work has been awful. but am all caught up now

hi to new people. what colour shag capes are you going for? think I need s new one this month and I'm looking to you for inspiration.

hi mrsavb sorry to hear uve been suffering with the vom. bet u wouldn't swap it for ttc though! 9+2 that's gone so fast. Ul be telling everyone soon!

well ertd has left the building. I'm determined to stay destressed so I ovulate at a better time. SNC I've thrown in law of the sod....a march due date would mess up my plans to see lion king in the theatre, that's this months did. and April due date would screw up going to a friends wedding. may and June would be OK atm but July I'm a bridesmaid/maid if honour for my best friend....so come on law if the sod, take Ur pick!

still pretty much sticking to the new diet too.

fx someone is about to get a bfp....when r u all testing. can't remember who is late now and on my phone so can't check back sorry!

I'm sure around the 17th I think (not tracking this month!)

That's gone quick Mrs! How are you getting on? Is this your first? (Sorry, I can't remember.)

Oh yeah and I'd live to join the grads Fred. I started out with everyone who is now due to pop. . . at body.

In regards to testing dates I'm not sure on my cycles... I had a withdrawal bleed for 4 days started 15th May but am certain I OV'd on the 23rd or 24th because of EWCM only a week later (on CD 9or10) so if I work on ERTD being due 2 weeks after ov I would be due ERTD tomorrow or Friday, if I fall into a 4 week cycle ERTD is due 12th but that would have meant a really short LP hmmm basically if no ERTD I will try to hold out until Sunday 16th before I test!

Evenin'
According to my phone app I should OV today or tomorrow, so I'll be in test anxiety mode around 20th if my cycle has levelled back to 28 days!
I have been modelling my brand new shag cape all this week (it's purple & sparkly!) and I'm absolutely knackered!
Coffee, the pregnancy book my over-organised DH bought himself (Pregnancy for Men: the whole 9 months by Mark Woods) has some good stats on time taken to conceive:
'If 100 couples are trying to conceive naturally:

20 will conceive within one month
70 will conceive within six months
85 will conceive within one year
90 will conceive within 18 months
95 will conceive within two years'
This is from NHS data across the board, so the 20 extra fertile lot are probably 18-25yr olds, and the couples having the harder time will likely be up the older end of the spectrum, and I guess most average 30-something couples (which I get the impression is our age range, though I don't know, I'm 31 btw) take up the middle zone.
So I'm not sure at what point fertility tests become standard, but with those stats then what Dulcet said sounds about right - if you're over 30 then after 6 months it's worth the docs making sure all is ok.

Bear - hello! to you too Sorry to hear you're struck with UTI evil! Just fyi, if you're seriously chugging the cranberry juice, Ocean Spray do a low-cal version which is only 20cals per 250ml and it tasted just like the regular stuff to me when I've tried it. Maybe worth switching, though I bet they charge twice the price for it ;-)