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When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Conception

The Elderberry Pavlovas, sausage bouquets, one giant sofa and the Gü pots of destiny! (thread 9)

993 replies

Bunnygirlie · 21/04/2013 22:56

Come on ladies, this is the one! Time for some BFPs!

The smallprint- Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 3+months, must have a special pot, NO instadiffers)

OP posts:

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Bunnygirlie · 22/04/2013 22:22

Sorry pip we didn't mean to leave you behind, glad you found us!

thunder always clothed! Don't want to scare peeps!

merk merk where are you?!?!?

frog good luck DTDing after that emotional and amazing end of Broadchurch!!!!

boom hmmmmm not really, I fully expect the witch will arrive by the weekend, having my usual pre-witch visitor but it is odd. I don't want my cycles to go all squiffy again

OP posts:

Cate555 · 22/04/2013 22:30

Good luck Frog I think this could be your lucky day!!

Peanut I think you need to get your doctor to ring & write to the clinic. The secretary is in totally the wrong job if that's how she speaks to people - bitch! But what goes around comes around she can't be happy in her life.

BoodIeBee · 22/04/2013 22:30

at MrsBoombastic! God damn it people, now I've got Shaggy in my head. Not just Mr. Boombastic, oh no, I've got his "greatest" hits going on in my brain now: Oh Carolina anyone? What about his In The Summertime Mungo Jerry cover? No? Just me? OK then...

MrsBoombastic, I am well chuffed by 'doing a boodle'! I'm not sure I can take credit for this age-old TTC trickery, but I do like to think that singing 'throw your legs in the air, wave them around like you just don't care' to the tune of Cypress Hill's Throw Your Set In The Air no less, is more unique to me!

Tallyra · 23/04/2013 00:38

OK girls, I've just had a shower before bed and just before I go to sleep, please can you answer me 2 questions that have bugged me for a very long time?

How on earth do you keep your towel wrapped around you while brushing your teeth?
(tmi alert) Does anyone have a method of keeping the bed clean whilst dtd on top? or are you all good girls who lie back and think of England?

Sorry. I just really want to know if anyone else has a solution to either one....

happylass · 23/04/2013 07:24

Morning Berries. Awoke to a big temp rise this morning which, if it is OV, means it happened yesterday on cd10 . If so we've totally screwed up shag week as only started last night cos DP has had man flu been really ill. So if I did OV on cd10 and DTD on cds 6 and 10, is there any hope at all this month??

BoodIeBee · 23/04/2013 07:43

Tally

A big bath sheet so tha you can get some serious tucking in of the towel going on (under the armpit for the tuck works for me!)

2.are you referring to the 'aftermath' of DTD on top? I tend to do a tres elegant sideways role onto my back in the hope of keeping some stuff in! Even more embarrassingly, as youngsters, I used to just slide up and let it drip out on his lower abdomen!!! (He didnt care if it saved changing rhe sheets!) Oh my god, the shame. I'm pretty sure I've said more than enough to out myself in here in the past...let's hope people aren't reading!

BoodIeBee · 23/04/2013 07:46

happy don't give up yet. I had a temp rise on cd10 this month which was sustained enough to get crosshairs on cd9! I definitely didn't ovulate then. Got positive opk a couple of days later and now this morning, cd17, I've had another significant jump. I guess you have to wait and see what your temp does tomorrow. Did you have any wine last night? Alcohol massively affects my temps, even just one glass!

BoodIeBee · 23/04/2013 07:48

Sorry about typos and autocorrects! I meant roll, not role earlier, obviously!

MrsB00Mbastic · 23/04/2013 07:53

Boodle awaiting my next chance to do the leg wave and sing! Missed out on yesterday's so will have to wait for tomorrow's DTD... Hope your bloods are the right day!

Tally these are indeed weighty questions. Hmm.

Re the towel: tuck it in under your armpit instead of between your boobs and then you can hold it down with your non-brushing arm...? or wear a dressing gown

Re the topsiding: nope. And I get really annoyed on the..um..dismount when all those swimmers get wasted! I've suggested to DH that we do a rollover manoeuvre before 'disengaging' but he looked at me like I was a nutter and said 'gerroff' so I'm taking that as a no [embarrassed].

happy still in with a chance! Tadpoles live for up to 5 days, so both 6 and 10 bonks are valid. Are you going to keep going with shag week just in case?

Right, off to docs to cry until they help me see what's what. Going to do as you say cate and ask them to write to the clinic to let them know how annoyed I am! No way am I waiting another year!

MrsB00Mbastic · 23/04/2013 07:55

Why can't I do square brackets?? WHY?

Oh and boodle, great minds clearly think alike when it comes to bathtime solutions.

Bunnygirlie · 23/04/2013 08:12

The Witch has arrived feeling low here and trying not to cry before work.

Oh why is this so hard and so unfair, TMI, even when I knew she was coming I still had that tiny glimmer of hope, why does my body try and trick me by not having the usual day or two of brown/pink goo before AF arrives in full flow. Wiped this morning and there she was, it like being slapped in the face and your heart just sinks.

OP posts:

MrsB00Mbastic · 23/04/2013 08:35

Sorry bunny, had my fingers crossed for you. She's such a bitch, big hugs x

Tallyra · 23/04/2013 09:45

aww bunny. Hugs for you.

re the towel, I seem to have hollow shoulders or something because no matter how I tuck it, putting my arm up to brush loosens it and bam, dh is very happy... not that that's a problem, but I don't like being cold.
Swimmers wise, dh sometimes tries to roll me over but I find that extremely awkward. I suppose if TTC, that's probably the best option but it's not always guaranteed to work. Btw, question was prompted by fun session as it is now cd7 and pretending that we are safe from forbidden conception atm... only a couple of days after af has gone, so we should be ok. It feels so wrong to be having to be careful!

yorkiebilb · 23/04/2013 10:06

bunny sorry to hear AF has arrived for you. Big hugs.

boombastic (loving the name and now singing that song!) good luck at the docs today. Hope your DH managed to get there as backup. Let us know how you get on...

Frogcatcher · 23/04/2013 10:17

Morning all. Pants (probably big ones or old ones) bunny to AF.

Tally this may make me weird but I have to clean my teeth before I shower. I can't stand the feeling of an unclean mouth in the shower! I'm also a big fan of the dressing gown but that may be because we live in a rather overlooked house & have a part-time SS!

I think we generally DTD on top "just for fun" or it's not necessarily the finishing post IYSWIM. Mr Frog is quite fond of "froggy" style (lying down) & I'm not sure that is very good for swimmer retention either. I didn't get to do boodle leg waving either last night as he wanted to cuddle after & given the pressure comment & fact I want to make demands tonight as well I thought I'd better keep him sweet so just did a lot of pelvic floor clenching & subtle hip raises instead!

happy FX. Alcohol seems to send my temps way up too by the way & so does taking it at any time after my usual 6am.

Good luck at the docs boodle!

Oh & if law of Sod is listening this month should be my month as I am supposed to go to hospital next month for my colposcopy follow-up & they won't do it if I'm pg.

MrsB00Mbastic · 23/04/2013 10:20

Well docs was a write-off. Apparently none of my slightly wonky results are wonky enough to warrant a diagnosis of PCOS, so nothing doing there. Just have scan to wait for next month sometime and then have to wait until Aug for FC appt unless it shows something monumental. Doc told me to stop stressing about it and that she didn't know why I was so distressed about it. DH then sided with doc and then after the appt said I was obsessed and relentless and he didn't know how much longer he could take it, and that I acted like I WANT something to be wrong with me. So now I feel totally shit, and as if everyone thinks I'm a total basket case.

I'm not a basket case am I?

Frogcatcher · 23/04/2013 10:34

Oh MrsByou're not a basket case. Mega Boombastic boos to unsympathetic drs & DHs. You know you can get pg so it must be so frustrating when your cycles are so out of whack.

I think I am going to try reflexology to try & regulate my cycles on various berries recommendations. Even if it doesn't sort them out it sounds like it could be very good for stress. Have you thought about trying that or maybe acupuncture if you feel like you have to do something before the FC in Aug? Just don't tell DH it's for TTC but to relax / sort out your stress about TTC. I've not booked any yet but found someone who sounds good through the Association of Reflexologists. There is a local area search function:

www.aor.org.uk/

MrsB00Mbastic · 23/04/2013 10:43

Thanks frog. I'm already seeing an acupuncturist, she's great but not had enough sessions yet to know if it's helping to regulate anything - fingers crossed!

Having calmed down a little, I'm actually wondering if some sort of counselling or therapy would be a good idea. I surprised myself at just how genuinely upset I got, I was so ANGRY when the doctor wouldn't/couldn't help. I think there's a good chance I haven't got over the miscarriage at all, I suppose I constantly feel like I've messed up my 'chance' because I got pregnant but didn't get a baby and now I can't do it again (putting it very crudely, but that's what I think the issue is). But I don't really know where to get counselling from! Not going back to the doctor, she already thinks I'm a fruit loop and besides, NHS waiting times to see a counsellor are about 4 months..

Anyone got any cunning plans?

yorkiebilb · 23/04/2013 10:46

'She didn't know why you were so distressed about it' ARE YOU SERIOUS?! I can't believe she actually said that to you. Does she not have any understanding of what you are going through? Apparently not.

I understand that feeling of wanting to figure out if there is something wrong now and not wanting to miss anything . If there is something wrong it means you can try and sort it out/deal with it now rather than spend months carrying on ttc and then they find out something is amiss which feels like wasted time I guess.

If you are obsessive and crazy then so are the rest of us on here and probably every other women ttc for 3 months or more!

I agree with the reflexology/acupuncture suggestion btw. It might help you feel like you are doing something to help you ttc and will indicate to DH that you are taking steps to try and relax.

yorkiebilb · 23/04/2013 10:52

How about private counselling then? I had some sessions last year about other issues and have contemplated going back. It's obviously going to cost you a bit of money but might help if you feel you have a lot of built up anger/upset from the mc. Just google counselling in your area and check that they are on the appropriate BACP list first.

I don't know if you do yoga but that helps me when I'm feeling anxious and upset.

Frogcatcher · 23/04/2013 10:53

Maybe a MC association or charity could point you in the direction of counselling if you don't want to go back to your doctor? Or perhaps just phone up the drs reception & see if you can get the name of someone you can see privately?

I try & hide a lot of my obsessive normal TTC behaviour from DP now & only share it with berries. God help me the day he finds my exercise book in which I have been stapling annotated OPKs this month to check the various strengths of line! That was merk's idea anyway but is proving useful! Has anyone seen her recently? Our queen of pimping has gone missing in action.

Tallyra · 23/04/2013 11:16

boom, I think the counselling idea is great. I went to a private place after my first mc be aide I was no linger wanting sex, and I really can't remember what she said, but it got me thinking and talking in a much more positive fashion. they charged, but it was income dependent so I paid the lowest whack. It really helped. Try asking at the epu in hospital or calling the miscarriage assoc. I actually think the treatment of women who miscarry is pretty shocking here - they might offer you a couple of sessions if you push for it but then nothing and no checking in wellbeing either. If you think you know the problem you're halfway to working out a solution and feeling SO much happier.

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SidneyBristow · 23/04/2013 11:44

Boom on your behalf. How very dare the GP & your DH be so patronizing...that is really shocking. You went there for help, and they both basically patted you on the head and told you to go away. You could always get a new GP, one you could trust and knew the meaning of 'compassion,' and but assuming you want to keep your DH, I'll let you borrow how I've recently explained it to mine: every time you go for a wee, you're half hopeful, half agonized over what you might find (or not). Every 14 days you're either crushed, or mentally regrouping, or arranging things for maximum sexiness, or you're praying that the twinges you feel are good twinges and not ones that will start the rollercoaster again. It's relentless, and inescapable, and it hurts that your one partner in all this actually has the luxury of setting it aside, and getting drunk if he wants to, wallowing in illness if he wants to, or just being not in the mood or too tired, if that's how he feels. He is still in charge of his life, whereas your every move is at least sort of related to TTC.

Oddly my DH seemed to comprehend it after that. The tears helped.
Let me know if you want me to come round and clobber your DH, or the GP.

As to counseling, is there a Relate near you? They're a charity, and less pricey than private.

SidneyBristow · 23/04/2013 11:45

And bunny really sorry about AF

Frogcatcher · 23/04/2013 12:26

Aaaah just got FB babyscan papped totally unawares! Not someone I know but the girlfriend of an ex who tagged him in it. Really wasn't expecting that as they're not married (not that should make any difference as neither are me & DP!), I thought he'd always been quite anti-kids & she already has a daughter who's about 16! Classic instadiffer

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