The Elderberry Pavlovas who occasionally sausage wang – a fabulous thread for 30+ ladies TTC #1 (Thread 8)

[Bunnygirlie]

Newbies very welcome provided they meet the strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 3+months, must have a special pot, NO instadiffers) and bring a bouquet of sausages when they join!

Just go for it cats You don't want to miss a potential chance & I work on the theory that people who do that job must have seen everything before. That's if they haven't told you specifically not to obvs (or you're into extreme kinkiness with barbed wire or summat that might cause the gynae to make comment!)

Nothing extreme in the charming house, I can assure you. Right! Message understood.

Barking if its anything like mine you need to press and hold the on button to see the last temp in memory (not just turn it on)

Afternoon berries!

Barking ha I love that you sleep-temped! Is this the start of something..will it be sleep-pimping next?!

Charming absolutely get your jiggy on. Speaking as someone who is often at the other end of the speculum, I couldn't care less, or be able to tell for that matter (unless as Frog says you specifically got told not to for swabs or something)!

Looking forward to some FC appt updates. I went to see my friend's baby today, 6wks but haven't been able to bring myself to go before. She was an IVF baby after three years of trying, so my friend knows how I feel and didn't push an earlier visit! Was actually lovely, the baby was very cute and I got to have a good whinge about how long it takes to get Clomid with someone who understands. First baby-visit in a while I haven't cried after (although give me time...)

Soooooooooo, I'm back. Bottom line is that I have A LOT more waiting to do. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!

I've been referred for an HSG, which I guess makes sense as no point throwing clomid at me if there is a problem in the tubes. She reckoned it will take 8-10 weeks for that appointment. I also have to get more blood tests done to check my progesterone and prolactin levels as the short LP was a concern. She told me to make sure I get them done on the "right" day this time as, in the past, doctor has been adamant that they were done on day 21, no matter what. She wants me to make sure they are done 7 days before AF due, which will mean no more than 2 days after ovulation for me! I'll then have an appointment with her in 3 months time to discuss all the results of these tests. If nothing is found with these tests, I will be off down the clomid path after that. I discussed thyroid with her but got the same old 'it's normal' spiel. DH went in for the kill at that point and she's agreed to review it next time once we know prolactin results as there could be a link, apparently.

So yeah. That's it. Another three months of futile shagging.

Aaah boodle sorry you're disappointed. Was hoping you'd be fast-tracked, it's all very well setting it all in motion but it doesn't make it any less frustrating does it? Why the chuffing hell heck do they have to make it so painful for us all, I bet if it was a consultant obstetrician who couldn't get diffed they'd be sorted in a month! I know it makes 'sense' not to throw clomid at you before getting tubes checked, but actually why the hell not, then if you get knocked up before they save themselves an HSG appointment! Annoyed on your behalf

Had some spotting just now and furtled around to make sure and crampy as hell, so it would appear I'm finally back to cd1, after a mere 47 day cycle this time. (I wonder if the acu had anything to do with it...?) Question is, do I now start to temp/cbfm? I have a thermometer and the monitor (although no batteries, which is why I didn't use it last cycle) but given how long my cycles are, I'm not sure I won't become an obsessive lunatic...advice appreciated Berries!

Peanut I think I wouldn't bother with the CBFM as it only really works if your cycle is under 45 days. Also, I found when using mine that I would put the stick in the CBFM, listen to what it said, then have a good look at the stick and decide what I thought it meant. I soon realised that I might as well be using OPKs anyway. My opinion is temping and cheap OPKs off ebay.

Boodle exactly what happened with me. As blood tests showed that I was OVing then something else was clearly the problem and no amount of Clomid was going to fix it. The HSG wasn't so bad really, rather like a smear with an audience as someone else said.

Thanks, Peanut, I'm not really disappointed as such; I'm glad that I'm getting the HSG before the clomid, rather than the other way round. Of course, having clomid AND being booked for an HSG would be lovely, but that's just not how the NHS roll, is it?!

On the subject of temping, I've shared my opinion many-a-time before, but I'm going for it again! And hoping none of the long-established berries sausage-pelt me.

For me, temping has been a massive help. My cycles are fairly regular, but ovulation date (and therefore cycle length) can fluctuate by 8-10 days. Temping has helped me spot ovulation and identify my short luteal phase problems. I always temp at the same time in the morning (6am). When at work, this is half an hour before I have to get up. I then hit snooze, which I have programmed for half an hour later! On the weekend, I still take temp at 6am, but I switch alarm straight off and go back to sleep! I am usually 'with it' enough to wait for the beeps and put the thermometer back on the side to check later. Occasionally I don't even make it to the beeps, and I wake up with thermometer still in mouth/in the bed/under the pillow! I then just use the 'press and hold' memory recall to get the reading.

Medical professionals have (so far) shown NO interest in my charts, but I'm glad that I've done them just for my own benefit.

Hope everyone's appts went well today. boodle sorry to hear you're disappointed at the pace of things. You'd think they would fast track people in their 30s seeing as we're constantly being reminded that it's not ideal timing (although I only met dh at 35 so not sure how it could have been ideal timing before then...)

Got my thermometer from amazon today so ready to start temping in the morning. Here's hoping it'll give me some insight into when I'm fertile if ever

I'll be joining you there bajas. Feeling optimistic that period must return at some point so have taken the temping plunge and got me a thermometer. So experienced berries, can you tell us what we should be looking for? Ta!

Temping all the way. Taught me loads. Basically, put all your data into fertility friend and it will look like your temps are all over the place. Do not panic. At some point they will rise and stay high until AF BFP time. You may not see this pattern clearly until you can see the cycle as a whole. FF will attempt to help you pinpoint when O happened with some crosshairs. You will probably get random erratic readings. Do not worry about this.

Boodle after reading about puppy and now you I'm bracing myself for the same 3 more months of pointless dtd . Why does it take them this long to get things moving when they already make you wait a year to start with?!
How are you feeling about it now? Did they not have any blood tests to show o? I had the 21 day test (knowing it wasn't going to show anything) and they called me to go back for a 28 day test as well, which had 'normal' levels.

barking tbh I'm just ignoring the appointments and just continuing to dtd 'as normal' rather than thinking of it as pointless. the appointments r just a bonus!

the whole ttc process is a total bag of shit!! its horrible every month, waiting for af and then there she is, without fail.
we have tried all the tricks, dtd every day, pillows, vitamins etc etc. nothing bloody works! aarrggh its the most difficult thing I have ever bothered to do...
why can't we just make a baby. we dtd every other day the whole month without fail. stupid egg, stupid sperm!

rant over!!!

To add to Boodles post re temping for the new tempy people;
Take your temperature at the same time each day at least 30 mins before you would normally wake up. This is a must if you want it to work
Make sure you get the thermometer in your mouth in the right place (a heat spot)
No need to write down your temperature when half asleep, simply turn the thermometer off and (provided it has a memory function, i think most work like mine where, when you turn it on later, you press and hold the on button to display the temp in memory) read it and record it later
Use fertility friend to record your temps, the free version is fine
Approx 2 or 3 days post ovulation fertility friend will give you crosshairs (in a normal world) which will 'cross' on the day it thinks you ovulated
The crosshairs are normally based on the fact that post O your temps will rise and stay higher than your pre O temps until AF, OR they will stay high if you are pregnant
Temps during AF and just after AF are erratic and may be as high as post O temps - don't worry. The pattern is normally a fairly stable set of lower temps for 5 - 7 days pre O, and a higher set of temps post O
Temping will only tell you when you ovulate (and/or IF your ovulate). It won't give you a pre warning of ovulation until you get to know your cycles. Therefore temping as well as using OPK's covers all bases, OPK will give you some warning of O, temping will confirm you O'd (remember it is possible to get a positive OPK and not actually O) and your chart pattern over a couple of cycles will help you learn about the length of your normal LP
Lecture over! Oh, and evening all!

boodle sorry to hear your appointment wasn't what you hoped.

Nowt much to say here, Dh wasn't up for it last night and I didn't care, it's very liberating not stressing about TTC, I know AF will be here in a few weeks and I don't mind, it's weird! Although I am sure the stress will start again next month

Evening berries. Glad to hear all the appointments went well but must be soooo frustrating that everything takes so bloody long! Am definitely going back to the GPs to demand my referral if I haven't got upduffed by the end of next cycle.
With regards to charting I thought I'd share mine [[http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/3fe8ca
here]] for those temping virgins as this month's is pretty textbook and I will take any opportunity to show it off now that I know how to This month I slept in 5 different beds in the space of a week as we were on our travels plus I never set the alarm when not in work, I just temp as soon as I wake up. This inconsistency doesn't seem to affect me, but others may say differently. Happy temping!!

To add to earlier posts for new temping people;
Take temp the same time each day

I agree with all that has been said about temping so far. I did it for about 6 months. It helped me to understand my cycle.

I now only use about 2 opks a month because I can tell when OV is coming.

For all the bloody good it's done me.

Ignore my stupid double post... using laptop and phone all at the same time!
Boodle sorry for the extra waiting for more tests. I guess you wouldn't mind if the tests were next week, its the time between them, then for results before you can move on to the next stage that must be frustrating

Wow thanks everyone for all the detailed help. I feel like I'll know exactly what I'm doing right from the start :)

Happylass is the peak on your chart ovulation?

Bajas OV is predicted by FF as day 12 (the vertical red line). I always get a dip the day before and then a gradual rise over several days. I usually get OV pain to back this up but didn't notice any this month. Have to say the rise on cd12 isn't as noticeable as usual (probably because I was ignoring Professor Merkin and being inconsistent with my timings!) but I always OV around the same time so for me FF is just confirming what I already know.

Ello, still can't bring myself to temp, even if it's been 11 shitty months now. I bought a new batch of OPKs but had no +s the past few months, am thinking I might buy some more, where do you get yours from peeps?

When I first started temping, I found it quite useful playing around on Fertility Friend a bit and having a go at some of their 'chart analysis' games. Helped me understand my own a bit more quickly, I think.

Barking, I have had blood tests that confirm ovulation, but I told the consultant today that for the two '21 day' tests I've had so far, AF has always arrived within 3-4 days. She didn't like that much and said I've got to have one more set but this time 7 days before AF rather than 7 days after ovulation. Not quite sure what she expects that to reveal, but I'll go along with it. I'll only be 2 DPO so I'm guessing it will show low progesterone levels. We shall see. It's going to be a bugger trying to get bloods taken based on an event in the future though!

Bunny, I don't know how you're feeling relaxed by NOT DTD! When DH was away a couple of months back, I hated knowing there was no chance! I guess my brain hasn't quite got the message yet that this ain't happening without help.

By the way, something else that FC mentioned today was the possibility that my uterus might be an 'inhospitable environment' and that's something that will get checked if tubes come back all clear. Suddenly, the Friends theme tune was playing in my head!

I get my OPKs from Amazon here, Bunny

Having withdrawal symptoms from OBEM tonight :(
Spotting has got worse today, almost like the lightest of light light light periods but its not bright red blood. If this isn't my BFP yes I know I'm stupid thinking that what else would cause mid cycle spotting?