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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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Original poster

TTC after MC - nice people in crap times, full of posifrickingtivity

982 replies

WillSantaComeAgain · 02/04/2013 13:49

Welcome aboard ladies (though obviously sorry you have to be here). We're a friendly bunch so come in and plump up a cushion for POAS Fridays and lots of posifrickingtivity. With a few (gentle) fish slaps thrown in for good measure.

OP posts:

SaggyOldClothCatPuss · 23/04/2013 11:46

"I get knocked down, ill get knocked up again, cos you're never gonna keep me down..." I'm still bloody singing that song!
It's going ok here. AF due today.--yesterday if going by my current cycle length. Still nothing.

Ariel21 · 23/04/2013 14:26

Hello everyone. I know it's a bit soon but I thought I would check in. Already recognised Onelittle and JBrd from the Nov thread that we've sadly had to leave.

I miscarried over the last week, at what should have been 9 weeks. This looks like a nice safe haven. We are naturally devastated but really positive for the future.

I'm back at work, in a beer garden doing some reading and writing...

OneLittleToddleTerror · 23/04/2013 14:57

Ariel I'm so sorry you are here too. I'm trying to be positive and think only of the future. I'm not sure if we'll try this month, or wait till a real AF. But it's hard to tell how I'll feel in a week, so I haven't ruled anything out. I guess I'll know I'm ready when I dust off that bbt thermometer and my fertility friend app.

Not sure what I'll do with my next booking in though. For my second time, I didn't fill out a new form, but used the one from my first time, and crossed out the last known period date. But then I didn't make it to the booking in first time, so the midwife haven't scribbled all over it. I don't think I could bring myself to fill out the same form yet again! I wonder how the midwife would react if I gave her the old one, and told her I would fill a new one in if I make it through the 12 week scan?

Ariel21 · 23/04/2013 15:49

Yes I know what you mean, I think we are going to go with the doc's advice and wait for AF - she said that if it was 'normal' then feel free to go for it. We are quite keen to jump back on the horse, so to speak.

Bought a rose bush yesterday to remind us of the baby, it's called 'Lark Ascending' which I thought was a bit lovely.

I didn't make it to booking in. I was due to discuss it with my doctor last week but instead she talked me through my MC :/

OneLittleToddleTerror · 23/04/2013 16:01

ariel I see, you must have been due end of Nov? I should have been 13 weeks now . My positivity today would be third time lucky and aiming for a 2014 baby!

JBrd · 23/04/2013 16:07

Hi Ariel, sorry to see you here as well - life is so cruel sometimes
Strangely enough, I had also been looking for a rosebush yesterday! However, it was one that I've had my eye on for a while, not really anything to do with my mc...
I also didn't make it to my booking appt, I started bleeding just when I had arranged it with the midwife. Just like last time. I had, however, filled in the sodding form. Just like last time. Because, of course, they had to change the form completely in between

My bleeding is getting less and less, and there is no pain or any discomfort anymore at all. I take that as a good sign, that my body is taking care of everything. Hopefully, the physical side of things will return to normal soon. I still feel a bit numb, not sure if I'm going to have a meltdown at one point... But I feel strangely calm and resigned, especially since I've passed the sac on Saturday. So different from the mc back in January.

I'm doing lots of baking and gardening, finding it very therapeutic. Fate has it that I've got last week and this week off anyway, as I'm starting a new job on Monday. Great timing

Ariel21 · 23/04/2013 17:41

onelittle Yes, the first calculation I used dated it at 27 Nov. Sorry to hear about your losses. I've been using gardening too JBrd - I'd never realised how therapeutic it was until this weekend. The idea of planting things and awaiting new life is really helping, especially this time of year. Might try some baking tomorrow night too.

fod27 · 23/04/2013 18:00

I've just recommended this site to two of my students and told then how much it helped me, one of them had a bleed at 6 six weeks (she's currently 12 wks) and has just started having pains in her lower back and abdomin, I was so worried for her that I contacted her GP and father - she is currently on route to A n R she was incredibly destressed (obviously) especially when one of her peers told her how she felt the same pains when she MC I simply informed her it was precautionary and not to worry....now I'm worried ;(

LittlePeaPod · 23/04/2013 18:55

Could I join? DF and I lost our first in early March..

LittlePeaPod · 23/04/2013 18:56

Sorry new to MN...

Bakingtins · 23/04/2013 19:25

Ariel and LittlePea - sorry you are here but you are very welcome.

All the talk of booking appts made me give a wry smile - I actually started to MC first time at my booking appt and the other 2 have been the week it should have been and I've had to cancel at last minute and throw the sodding form in the bin in a temper
If there's a next time I will inform MW I'm pregnant but I'm not making any appointments until I'm past 12 weeks. It will be my 6th pregnancy, I have taken so much folic acid I rattle and they are not going to tell me anything I don't know. Will be having consultant care from the off next time anyway.

Ariel your rose bush has a lovely name. What are the flowers like? I find gardening very therapeutic as well - I have a little corner of the garden where I've planted some 'memorial' plants (chosen for flowering around MC or EDDs, lovely names or associations with remembrance). I find it comforting to go and potter there.

Mummytothearkbuilder · 23/04/2013 19:33

Welcome ariel and littlepea - sorry you are both here :-( you will find lots of support on here, it really is a safe haven.

I am currently 7dpo and was feeling really positive but this afternoon saw someone I am friends with on Facebook post a 16 week scan pic with her due date the same as mine and I had just gone to pieces. I keep looking at the pic and are a perfectly formed little baby and can't help thinking that I should have one just like that inside me. She is completely entitled to post her scan pics for people to see I just don't know if I can look at them and see all the comment and updates etc - am I a complete cow for de-friending her?? I don't know her that well - she used to be my DS's key worker at his

Mummytothearkbuilder · 23/04/2013 19:34

Okay posted too early!!!!!

She used to be his old key worker at nursery - do you think it's acceptable to de-friend or am I a cow? Xx

Thundercatsarego · 23/04/2013 19:59

Are you actually friends, mummy?

If not yes defriend her. Or just do that thing where you don't see her updates?

Ariel21 · 23/04/2013 20:10

Mummy I think you can edit whether you see the posts in your newsfeed without actually defriending if that helps?

That's a lovely idea Bakingtins - I'm sorry to hear about your losses. The new rose bush should have some lovely peach 'bowl' shaped flowers, will look forward to those later in the year. LOVE roses.

Thundercatsarego · 23/04/2013 20:20

Hi aerial and pea too.

Mummytothearkbuilder · 23/04/2013 20:38

Thanks ladies - I'm going to de-friend her - she is lovely but I don't really need her as a friend on Facebook. I just wanted to make sure I was being a complete cow or over sensitive by it xx

lovelylara · 23/04/2013 20:53

Please can I join too? I was due in November too and miscarried last Thursday :( Feeling rather fragile, mentally and physically, but a little better than last week.

Ariel21 · 23/04/2013 21:01

Hello Lovelylara Sorry to see you here too (in the nicest possible way).

It's nice to have somewhere to hide. We didn't tell many people about the pregnancy so don't have many RL people to talk to.

GuffSmuggler · 23/04/2013 21:05

Oh baking I've just shuddered at the thought of going through another booking appointment. I totally agree if when I get PG again there is no way I'm going through that rigramole of form filling/question answering/weeing in a pot/bloods taken until after the 12 week scan.

saggy you are going through exactly what makes me dread TTC again! The 'am I/aren't I/I won't POAS it's too early/well maybe I will'. It really is enough to drive you bonkers!! We are all willing your AF to stay away.

Hi aerial, littlepea and lovely, so sorry you're here, hopefully we can all get each other through.

fod27 · 23/04/2013 21:17

Hi newbies so so sorry your here, it's really really crappy... No one can understand the ups and downs that you go through and the guilt you feel when you begin to feel positive again... You really are in good hands here, it's amazing how many women have been through this...and it's only when your experiencing it that friends and family volunteer such experiences (of course it's a conversation killer in normal circumstances) but I too have had students come to me a confide in me about their MC's I think they find it easier to talk to someone that gets it and understands that the pain will always be with you and that its ok to "not be over it"

fod27 · 23/04/2013 21:19

mummy if your a cow that makes two of us heheeee, I've deleted loads of people... Personally I think If they can't see things from this side of the fence and become offended then they weren't really my friends in the first place! I can see why they would want to shout it from the roof tops I really do but surely they can understand why I want to scratch their fucking eyes out

BirdsDoIt · 23/04/2013 21:27

Hello, I think I was on this thread several threads ago but have had a bit of a break from mumsnet while in strange limbo between miscarriage/ttc again - i had a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks and didn't get erpc straight away - we waited for three weeks for something to happen naturally, but apart from constant bleeding nothing did happen, so finally went for erpc two and a half weeks ago. Stopped bleeding this week, thank goodness - about ten weeks after it started, just ridiculous, and it's been so exhausting - and we're finally feeling able to start thinking about trying again. (And maybe actually doing the deed!) Anyway, that's just a long preamble to saying hello and can I please rejoin the soon-to-be-knocked-up-again gang? (positive thinking!!)

ariel and bakingtins I love the idea of planting something for the baby.

SaggyOldClothCatPuss · 23/04/2013 21:45

Welcome Birds, Im sorry to see you here. We are a lucky thread though, so fingers crossed. Take a peak up there^^ at Fri 05-Apr-13 21:50:38 for the light hearted thread rules, and dive right in.

SaggyOldClothCatPuss · 23/04/2013 21:55

Is it about time we had a new set of stats ladies? Shall I start us off?
SaggyOldClothCatpuss 1DS 1DD 1MC -TTC cycle 2 AF/POAS 23April

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