Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Excellent (or should that be eggcellent?) egg buddies! Anyone having IVF/ICSI in April/May/June 2013 come and join us!

999 replies

EuroShaggleton · 31/03/2013 15:35

We've almost filled the second thread so here is a new one, so we can carry on chatting! Threads #1 and #2 saw some stunning successes and some sad outcomes. We'll have more of the former and less of the latter on thread #3 please!

All comers welcome. I found it very useful to be with people going through the same thing when I did my first cycle, so if you would like to join us, please come on in!

OP posts:
twinklestar2 · 16/04/2013 14:30

That's fab new crisps!

Good luck for Thursday euro.

Original poster
EuroShaggleton · 16/04/2013 15:52

No problem keep. Hopefully I won't need luck for Thursday (but thanks to you and others for the good vibes anyway). All I want is an answer to the question "can we go again after 2 periods post-mc". We tried to get an answer over the phone but got nowhere so ended up making the appointment!

I'm glad the 4some are still going well crisps When is ET?

OP posts:
keepitgoing · 16/04/2013 15:56

Hmm. 'Yes, you can euro. £75 please'....

Original poster
EuroShaggleton · 16/04/2013 16:21

£75. Double that I expect. Just to get the answer to one bloody question!

OP posts:
chummy1 · 16/04/2013 21:45

Hi Everyone, Thank you for all the good wishes for Friday. Cannot believe it has come to it but IVF here we come!!! aarrrggghhh! hey ho....

Motor - I giggled! v funny and actually true!! lol! i was skinny skinny until about 12 months ago... just thrown everything at trying to gave that elusive BFP!

Re the kind comments about the high level of monitoring required, there is a ARGC clinic that will undertake this near a friends house (in Hampshire) which means i can stay there for the two weeks of monitoring (if we get this far) .... has anyone been thru the Argc on here?? I just don't know what to expect!?!?

putthecrispsDOWN · 16/04/2013 22:42

Off to see the wizard tomorrow for ET...nervous but excited! Just want to know we still have some of the awesome foursome left. Having acupuncture in the morning which will chill me out nicely.

Will update tmw evening...having sedation for ET as I have wonky insides as well as all the other complications....

motorcycle being a mother is not too much to ask. Keep the faith!!

MotorcycleMama · 16/04/2013 23:06

Best of luck crisps - look forward to hearing how you got on. Fingers crossed!!!

Nokkie73 · 16/04/2013 23:07

crisps just wanted to wish you all the very best for tomorrow. You have done brilliantly so far. I will be keeping my fingers and toes crossed for the fabulous four. We can name them, John, Paul, George and Ringo. Grin.

chummy hello ! Welcome aboard the IVF sunshine bus.

Waves at everyone else.

Noks

scarlett love the phones4u comment !

twinklestar2 · 16/04/2013 23:11

Best of luck crisps with 'The Beatles'!

MotorcycleMama · 16/04/2013 23:17

I have a dilemma at the moment. DH has become pretty low in mood as he fears losing his freedom and money if we are actually successful in having a child. Ultimately, he'd rather not have kids, even though we got married on the basis that he was up for it. He feels pretty terrible about this, so it is difficult to be cross. So hard to know how to tackle this. Putting this on hold isn't sensible, as it isn't going to get any easier. Deciding to put a stop to it would just leave me terribly resentful and unhappy for the rest of our married life. On the other hand, it doesn't feel right to continue with something that he doesn't want. Have any of you had any experience of this? I feel a bit lost Confused.

Nokkie73 · 16/04/2013 23:29

motor you poor thing. Sometimes the bloke may feel a bit redundant or just out of their depth with all of this ivf malarkey. I know it sounds blindingly obvious, but have you had proper chats with him about how he feels and about how you feel ? I know that I have bottled stuff up with 'I'm indoors and when we finally do speak about it, everything comes out wrong or I just get upset or angry. I guess that a lot of this process is so driven by the female that we almost don't stop to ask how the bloke feels and when we do, the answer isn't always what we want to hear. Perhaps he's just scared about it not working and seeing you upset and the impact that may have on your relationship, even though he hasn't exactly expressed it as such. Obviously I don't know how you two communicate but what I have realised is that sometimes feelings get lost in translation. Don't give up as you may be able to sort this out. Will it help if he has a bit of counselling ? X

MotorcycleMama · 16/04/2013 23:57

Thanks for the rapid support nokkie ! We've talked this through a couple of times, and we just get to the point where there is nothing left to say. We both acknowledge that there would be real problems for our marriage if we just put a stop to the baby making endeavours. If we can't have kids despite pursuing opportunities, I'll live with it, but I just don't think I could just stop it as we are now. I would be resentful to say the least. His happiness means a lot to me, and mine to him, which I guess is a good foundation for a marriage. The thing is, I have a firm belief that having a family would actually make him very happy. Trouble is, I can't vouch for that! I have suggested counselling, or even talking to his mates who have children, but you know what men are like!
I think that you may be right about him being scared about the effects if it all went wrong though.
I think I just have to keep on, and just talk to you ladies rather than him about it all the time!

Nokkie73 · 17/04/2013 00:14

motor you are more than welcome ! I guess because you're actually doing something about it now, reality has set in and it has all become so real to him. I had terrible trouble getting mine to engage and talk about ivf when we were waiting for our NHS treatment that never was. I did speak to a male friend of mine who went through ivf and he said that until it actually happens, blokes just don't engage. They're not so good at talking about it 'in the abstract' as it were and will only get properly involved when it's actually happening. A bloke's psychology is something to behold at times ! Sometimes they don't like change and they get scared about it. By the same token, if it's so fundamental to you then you can't give-up. I do hope things settle down for you though. You know where we are if you need to chat things through.

Noks x

buzzybee123 · 17/04/2013 09:46

hi motor i'm here for a hand squeeze, I agree with what noks I think he probably is scared about it all and maybe in his funny way is trying to protect you from both it all especially if he is wottied it won't work, men are funny creatures to work out, sometimes men take a bit longer to process things, big hugs x

Original poster
EuroShaggleton · 17/04/2013 11:07

I agree - he probably is just scared for you both. Hand squeeze.

OP posts:
chummy1 · 17/04/2013 11:34

Motor I am jumping in here as I have a friend who went through a similar experience (in fact, identical). The pregnancy was full of ups and downs as her DH felt exactly as your husband does now, however their DD is now 2 and Daddy dotes on her and happily spends everything that they can afford on her!) I think this is often the way...... the thought of a baby versus your own little DD/DS looking at you seems to be very different! Still very difficult for my you now (as it was for my friend now) and she ribs her DH about it now!!!

putthecrispsDOWN · 17/04/2013 16:04

Hi lovelies

Good day today...all four had made it to today, but one had developed some of Scarlett's superpowers Wink and another was not high quality enough to freeze. Had the remaining two replaced and am now back home with my fingers crossed. Have two wait two weeks for OTD there is no bloody way I could last that long

motor hugs for you, hope everything works out well
Euro best wishes for tomorrow, hope you get the answers you need!
Thanks twinkle and noks and buzzy and everyone else for the well wishes X

buzzybee123 · 17/04/2013 17:38

oooh crisps very exciting, plan nice things over the next two weeks fingers are crossed for you

MotorcycleMama · 17/04/2013 17:54

buzzy euro crisps chummy Thanks so much for the support. I have no doubt that if we are successful, DH will adore his offspring. Just hope I can keep him on board enough to keep going through the process and not feel too alone. My saline infusion sonogram came back with nothing abnormal detected today, and only moderate pain and lack of dignity Blush so that is great. One step closer.
crisps that is fantastic news!! You must be delighted, and rightly so.

buzzybee123 · 17/04/2013 18:05

motor thats good news, dignity ha I did used have that but not anymore Grin Its a long hard process that will have its ups and downs, I know my husband worries about the actual pregnancy and how my body will cope etc, I know he thinks about it a lot too and has said he doesn't want me to put myself at risk. Its all just a very scary time.

Well I am having my 'bleed' now should have started on Monday but I don';t think it matters, I feel like shit today, not sure if this is because the 'bleed' is alot heavier than my normal AF, stress or bloody annoying patients at work today. I thought I would feel better as time went on, well I have some reports to finish so better get cracking

waves to everyone else :)

MotorcycleMama · 17/04/2013 20:08

'Scuse my ignorance buzzy but what is the 'bleed' Confused? Obviously not just AF.. Hope it is not too much of an ordeal.

Original poster
EuroShaggleton · 17/04/2013 20:29

Sorry to hear you are feelin rubbish soon. What's the next step? Different drugs? I feel like by this point I know a reasonable amount about IVF and the different protocols, but I have no idea how DE IVF differs.

motor that's good news about the sonogram.

crisps glad to hear you have two good embies on board. When is test date?

Dignity. Hmm, sounds vaguely familiar. I think I remember having some in the distant past, before half of London peered up my fanjo....

OP posts:
Original poster
EuroShaggleton · 17/04/2013 20:33

Soon? That was supposed to be buzz! Not sure what happened there.

OP posts:
buzzybee123 · 17/04/2013 21:09

motor yes it basically AF, they just refer to it as a 'bleed' not your period, the joy of cultural difference although usually my periods have been 24-48 hours

my next step is to start taking estrogen from Monday, I honestly can't function or focus right now :(

MotorcycleMama · 17/04/2013 21:30

Gosh, buzzy, in some ways I am glad the the whole reality and process of this business only reveals itself bit by bit! I refused to take the pill anymore at the age of 30 as I hated messing about with my hormones - now look what I'm letting myself in for! Hope you are feeling a bit better soon. I'm enjoying a large red Wine to block out the emotional upheavals with DH and the pain and indignity of today's scan. Any excuse Wink.