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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Excellent (or should that be eggcellent?) egg buddies! Anyone having IVF/ICSI in April/May/June 2013 come and join us!

999 replies

EuroShaggleton · 31/03/2013 15:35

We've almost filled the second thread so here is a new one, so we can carry on chatting! Threads #1 and #2 saw some stunning successes and some sad outcomes. We'll have more of the former and less of the latter on thread #3 please!

All comers welcome. I found it very useful to be with people going through the same thing when I did my first cycle, so if you would like to join us, please come on in!

OP posts:
twinklestar2 · 02/05/2013 22:30

Thanks everyone for lovely words. The consultant did say to us at our first appointment that his most successful patients are people like us: where the woman is young and the man just needs to make some lifestyle changes. So I just need to hold on to that.

I felt like shit yesterday and OH was positive; today it's the other way round! Argh this rollercoaster!

twinklestar2 · 02/05/2013 22:37

Nok - 4.5 years is harsh. You so deserve your BFP and SOON.

Jewcy - I've recently realised that the IVF cycle is really really quick which makes me feel so much better. The end is in sight for you!

Euro - good luck for the next cycle. You're one of the first people I remember from the conception boards. I don't want to see you on here much longer!!!

buzzybee123 · 02/05/2013 22:46

noks I did Grin Grin at your comments

twinkle it can hard to be on the same page, it will happen for you

jewcy sounds like a good plan to me

well I am now on my hols, I'm shattered and have so much to do, we leave on Saturday

twinklestar2 · 02/05/2013 22:51

Thx buzzy and GOOD LUCK!!

It's hard because today we found out that close friends of OHs have sold their house today and are leaving london and moving to Oxford. They already have one child and are 7 months pregnant with number 2 - pregnant first month both time AND got married after us so double kick in the guts.

That was OUR plan. To have babies and move to Oxford :( So it feels like they're living our life while we're just stuck in limbo land.

buzzybee123 · 02/05/2013 23:20

twinkle Oxford is over rated Wink there is still time for you to have your babies and to move to where ever you want,

twinklestar2 · 02/05/2013 23:36

:)

Nokkie73 · 03/05/2013 00:08

euro why, thank you. Here's to your ovaries and everything else playing ball for this cycle. Your hol should, hopefully, help. Xxx

jooooocie you are on the hardcore drugs and cycle programme now luv. No going back ! Try to enjoy it (easier than said, I know) but you will be well under way in a few days. It's well exciting, as we say down sarf.

crisps if I ever catch you not swearing and being generally potty mouthed on here, you will get a dig in the ribs. Swear. Rant. Rave. Swear some more. Swear just because you can. I think we have all been at the end of others 'wisdom' and this weird revisionist kind of fore-telling of history (if that makes sense !) because of the situation we find ourselves in. The 'Oooohhhhh, I just knew it would work for you this time' bullshit. Why ? Because you saw it in your tea leaves ? Because you have some sixth sense ? Because you saw it in your third fucking eye ? Bullshit hit you did luv. But, we grit our teeth and take it because if we do challenge this outrageous nonsense, we are accused of being too emotional or hysterical (and 'clearly' not coping). It's all bollocks, really. I think we end-up internalising a lot because of the lack of empathy shown to those in this situation.....maybe it will make us stronger in the end. It better had, or else I will spend the next thirty or forty years being a right bitch.

twinks thank you. That made me a bit teary you daft moo ! I have a friend who tried to empathise with my situ (she knew her and her other half would have difficulty conceiving so when they started to try, went straight to IUI and got diffed third try, after a total of three months trying). In the same period of time we've been trying, she has met a fella, got engaged, married, bought lovely house, had a year of enjoying marred life, and sprogged and yet is an expert in the emotional rollercoaster of ttc. Ffs. She's lovely and well meaning (but she does drive me mental sometimes). It's a bag of shit comparing our lives to others (especially when they have the ones we want) but we have to think that maybe our paths will take a turn that we didn't expect, but that doesn't mean we won't get to the end we want. Chin-up lass. You sound as though you are in good hands.

buzz go forth and be a train blazer for the de's amongst us. Will you have wifi where you are ? If not, sort it ! We are here to support you every step of the way. X

Where is motor ? I hope she's ok.

Noks xx

Nokkie73 · 03/05/2013 00:11

buzz I meant a trail blazer. Ffs, don't mention trains around here !

twinklestar2 · 03/05/2013 10:21

Thanks Nok, it IS hard and no one understands unless they've been through it. It's like a dull ache every day and a kick in the teeth everytime someone announces they're pregnant or you see a scan pic on Facebook it you see pics of the bloody duchess!

I tell people I just don't want to talk about it anymore. I know they're being well meaning but I can't hear 'relax', 'go on holiday' or don't think about'. One friend told me I was 'too stressed'. When I challenged her by saying it was fine, she said she could tell I wasn't fine and I had to stop stressing. I actually got stressed trying to stress to her I wasn't stressed!!

Another friend told me to tell me husband to take acid as 'that's what her mate did and he visualised the sperm meeting egg while he was tripping and the girl got pregnant'.

I mean, FFS, COME ON?!?!

EuroShaggleton · 03/05/2013 10:34

crisps yes, I'm all set. It's just a case of monitoring to make sure my body is doing what it should for me. So it's all quite relaxed until I lose my shit at egg collection time .

twinks I know what you mean - I think I have served my time in purgatory!

I completely get what you mean. Some friends of ours started trying for #2 a month after we started ttc. They got diffed second month and are going to start trying for their third this summer. They have a lovely family and are lovely friends but I'm still going to cry out of frustration if they manage #3 before I can get there with my first (and probably only).

Acid you say?

buzz good luck! When will you be back?

noks how are you feeling? It's not long now to the hysteo, right?

OP posts:
Nokkie73 · 03/05/2013 12:51

twinks that is proper bat shit crazy. Take acid and you'll get diffed ? Ffs.

euro hysto on Tuesday. I cannot wait. Hmm. Still, at least the sun is shining and I am going to see my Bessie mate later. Happy days.

Where is everyone else !

Jewcy · 03/05/2013 13:49

Twinks, your friend's suggestion is preposterous. What a crass thing to say.

Being an ancient fucker I find it very easy to hear pregnancy announcements as long as the woman is in her twenties or thirties. After all, this is the natural order of the universe; this is when women are supposed to be popping 'em out - fatties, smack-heads; the lot. However, woe betide some over-40 getting diffed within earshot and I seriously feel like killing myself.

What can we do? Fuck all. We have to keep pushing those thoughts from our minds which would tell us we are the anomalies it's never going to happen to. Where is the proof that we will never be mums? Where are the stats? Where is it written? Nowhere! Hurrah!

Thinking of you today, buzzy as you prepare to fly tomorrow..

Nokita, not sure where the fuck you are but it's a dark and [pregnant] sky o'er 'ere...

Jewcy · 03/05/2013 14:04

Hey, buzzy, can you tell me about the couple of scans you must've had before you fly over? What can I expect to pay for a scan? How thick was your lining?

MotorcycleMama · 03/05/2013 14:15

Hi nokkie and all of you. Sorry, I've gone a bit quiet. The good news is that my clinic came up with a potential donor 10 days or so after I enrolled on the egg share programme. Unfortunately I have had to turn the offer down due to genetic issues amongst others, which feels so wrong after praying for a quick result. I feel guilty about letting the donor down too, as she is bound to be going through hell with all of this lark too! Also, my DH has become quite distant, so I am feeling very alone. We are usually very close, and I know he is trying to do the right thing, but things just aren't right.
I am celebrating and commiserating with you all whenever I read your stories, but as you can see, I'm probably best not joining in when I feel like this! A soon as my mood has lifted enough to be sociable, I'll be chatting away as usual.
Love to you all. X

Jewcy · 03/05/2013 15:17

Aw, bless you, motor, I'm thinking of you. Stay positive x

twinklestar2 · 03/05/2013 17:17

Oh motor. Thinking of you and hope you're back soon x

Re my acid story. Can you believe it? I'm just trying to highlight the level of ridiculous stories I've had to put up with about getting pregnant.

Oh and the other one: just get drunk and have sex. Hmmmm my husband has been told by a consultant at a top hospital in London NOT to drink, but we should forget all that and just get drunk yeah?! Arrgghhh

buzzybee123 · 03/05/2013 19:57

oh arse I just lost a post Angry

noks I actually laughed out loud at your train comment Grin I think you are one of the witty BESH ladies, I sometimes lurk on there

twinkle Shock Angry I think if someone esle said to me to relax its all stress related I would rip out their tongue and shove up their arse, why do people think comments like that are helpful

jewcy I haven't had any scan here perhaps I should have not sure if it would have helped my menkulling, I think they cost between £90- £150 depending on where you live. Not too long now for you

motor big hugs i'm sorry that you had to say no to your donor and that your husband is being distant, this is such an unnatural process and can be stressful, we are here for

Well I am packed, just a couple of little jobs to do tomorrow then we're off, I have been a bit snappy with Barry, hoping it doesn't get any worse Hmm

twinklestar2 · 03/05/2013 19:59

GOOD LUCK BUZZY XXX

Jewcy · 03/05/2013 21:21

Good luck, Buzzy! May all your dreams come true... xxx

buzzybee123 · 03/05/2013 22:04

thank you ladies, I do feel rather calm at the moment, just hope it lasts

EuroShaggleton · 03/05/2013 22:49

Good luck!

OP posts:
MotorcycleMama · 04/05/2013 06:50

Thanks to jewcy twinkle buzzy nokkie - I feel like a different woman today! I've felt dreadful for a few days, and thanks to your kindness and having a chat with DH I'm feeling a lot better.
Best of luck buzzy!

MotorcycleMama · 04/05/2013 07:04

And another thing.. Pineapple, which is said to be beneficial for implantation as it contains bromelain which is an anti-inflammatory - I am confused. I thought the 'pipelle', or uterine scratch procedure was thought to be beneficial due to the healing process that occurs after it. Surely the 'scratch' must cause some sort of inflammation, as do all injuries.
Any thoughts?

EuroShaggleton · 04/05/2013 08:00

motor I'm glad you are feeling better today.

I've heard both that pineapple helps implantation and that it is bad for it! A friend of mine craved it in early pregnancy. I don't know what to think, tbh.

OP posts:
twinklestar2 · 04/05/2013 10:47

Good to hear you're feeling better motorcycle :)