The BESH Old Skool Gin Palais: if you're name's not down, you're not coming in

[FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn]

Cream walls? Check
Pit of Doom? Check
Obscene amount of gin in well stocked bar? Check

The BESH Gin Palais is open to those who fit our demanding criteria. Seek out the BESHtionnaire and prove yourselves worthy - under 30s and instadiffers will be escorted from the premises

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! After thinking I was dead Zen, I'm suddenly freaking out. Help me! I can't cope with the wait :( But I have to. Knowing the chances are so low and stuff. Drinking shitty decaff. All I want to do us neck a bottle of sauvignon :(

Oh no, was that my fault? Sorry! I think I maybe shouldn't post anymore, I keep putting my foot in it.

How many days are you, is it 5? Can you pretend to yourself you're just on a 2 week detox for your skin? Shall I throw fish at you?!

No daftie, I've been thinking it all afternoon.

All fish gratefully received.

Here, have some organic salmon to go with your detox. High in omega whatsits, y'know.

My friends want to go deep sea fishing when we're on holiday. I shall not be going because nobody would catch any fish, they would ignore the bait and eat my puke. Again.

Fwiw Hest, I'm not sure I'd be very zen either. But in my experience, I think people who are zen are a bit bloody aggravating.

Go to the shop, buy a fucktruck of chocolate and crisps, and eat it all. (After you've finished your healthy main course of pak choi and alfalfa sprouty things of course. )

I agree. Zen like people are annoying. People can join in with a good panic. I myself was worrying on your behalf earlier.

people can join in with a good panic

I like that. I'm going to use that in my every day life!

There is an extremely fine line between Zen and Smug fucking twat.

#thoughtfortheday

Here Hest you can share my Porpoise of Patience. I know I know, porpoises are mammals shut up, inner pedant

Porpoises are mammals you know....

I shall eat my veg and go to my Council meeting and may drink some wine when I get in

There is an extremely fine line between Zen and Smug fucking twat.
So very, very true.

hest, jeffy's chances were low as well, weren't they (weren't they?) and look at her brilliant WIN!

I know it's frustrating, take some deep breaths then scream. Maybe try telling yourself you'll test tomorrow, then tomorrow tell yourself the day after. It might help

Anyone want to see a horsey scan? They've released a short video of one of Frankel's mares being confirmed in foal. She's called Midday and was a very good racehorse herself. Video here

It's like Alcoholics Anonymous, isn't it? Take it a day at a time..

My name's Moll and I can't stop weeing on fivers.

Bonsoir hags, I am still on my holidaayeezz but, inspired by the visit to Nimes today MATV is watching Sparticus bore so I am on here.

I noted Twinks comment about Yoni massage and did a little google and thought this might be of interest/amusement. Shall we club together and see if he'll do a discount for desperate BESH like us? Itll make a change from accupunture......It gave me & MATV a giggle anyway.

www.afternoondelight.me/ladies/m.index0.html

And I have to say £80 for nearly two hours is a bargain!!

Q: Are you naked during the ritual ?
A: No, there is no reason for me to be naked during the ritual.

ARF!!!

Next time BE gets frisky, I'm going to request that I be undraped for the entirety of the ritual.

Because I'm often wearing the curtains when he gets home.

It's what us theatre people do.

I just found another one who is actually based in my town [shocked]

That said, I really think MATV might have to have a go at this, with/on me obviously.

That website is amazing. And pornographic. I've come over all funny looking at it.

emoticon fail

Twink if you think thatwebsites porno, try watching Spartacus. proper soft porn! Just watched a woman sucking another woman's nipple tassle will never look at nipple tassels in the same way

HWCA likes Spartacus (funny that), but he reckons Game Of Boobs is ruder. I told him I would flash my tits at him every time there were boobs on screen but I got a bit bored when there were three prostitutes in the room and pubes on show too.

Don't worry, I don't think I could compete with the boob content of Spartacus or Game of Boobs, especially when there's pubes thrown in too. Just watched another sex scene and said to MATV 'I bet that's exactly what we look like when we do it'(ie über sexual, perfect bods making perfect sex noises/faces). MATV lol'ed. he's probably right.

Rasp I'm loving the pictures of Nimes. How have I not been there? We always seem to go the other way from "our" village when we are down there. Hope you are having a lovely time.

Blimey@afternoon delight. That's not that far from me... And £80 is a bargain....