TTC 10 + months, part 14 (eek)

[GinSoaked]

A friendly, supportive thread for lovely ladies taking waaay longer than they ever expected to win their babies

Just quickly on way into work.

Well done nelly!!! pupo indeed.

Scan went well and i have my trigger shot for Saturday night. 10 follies evenly spread across the ovaries. Smallest 14mm and biggest 21mm. lining now 12mm. have scaled down on dose of stims and start antibs tomorrow because if the endo. roll on Monday!

Hi ladies

Nelly ? Yay for good ET. Looks really good. Fingers tightly crossed for you.

MrsD ? Totally second what you said to Joy about rating others chances better than our own. I don?t know why that happens. Maybe we are trying to self protect. Enjoy being PUPO.

Lemon ? about due date. I can?t imagine how it must feel. A tight squeeze. Do you have your next IUI planned?

Buzzy ? You must be leaving in the next week no? How exciting? I would love to be cat sitter? Whistle at your frilly knickers?

Gin ? Fab news. Really happy and delighted for you.. Yay!

Sar ? How are you feeling? Are you going for an early scan?

Critter ? Wow. That?s impressive but make sure they take good care of you and monitor you for OHSS. I?m so intrigued about Mr C after all the uproar about his handsomeness.

Zippy ? Welcome. I too am unexplained so totally know how you feel. I know plenty of pregnant ladies in RL who drink and smoke in pregnancy. I feel stabbing pains every time I see it. I hope your stay here won?t be too long. These ladies are a lovely bunch. Sorry about your painful HSG. Ouch.

Euro ? Are you back from your trip? Sounded like a busy one. Totally agreed about wanting to know the cause of ?unexplained?

Joy ? I?m sorry you are feeling so down. I do think the AC journey is one that is very up and down. I?m no where as far down the process as most of you ladies on here but I do find myself feeling very positive one day and not at all the next. Have you had your follow up appointment yet? I remember you said you were going to email questions in advance. I agree with another poster that IVF is really a numbers game. Truth is I don?t think any of us really know if and when it will work. But I do know that you are a lovely and generous person always helpful and supportive on here. No one deserves it more than you. I guess it?s a matter of keeping faith? [tight squeeze]

No much news here. Smiley face on OPK today but I have given up on natural conception so not feeling excited. Another blood test booked for next week. Had some really down-beat chats in RL about IVF this week with friends. Someone had12 mcs and another who spent more than £100k on IVFs ? 4 mcs later they have a baby. The latter did tell me it was all worth it though. I?m not sure it was good for me to hear these stories. Also, an alarming number of these RL people are mixed race couples. I am back wondering if there is a link again.

x post
Madness - hurray it all looks good. Excited for Monday!
So much going on on Fred at the mo.

sea I've never read any evidence about mixed race couples having any more problems ttc. I do know one couple (Chinese/German) who are having problems but then I know plenty of other mixed race couples who have had no problems at all. I think it's probably a red herring, but I know that you're searching for an answer.

fantastic madness!

Mrsd I know you are right. I guess I'm really desperate for an explanation

Seriously. It's raining hail stones outside my window!

Well done mad on the excellent number of follies, in our clinic they aim for 6-10 as that gives the highest chance of success without risks.

And yay for being PUPO nelly.

Sorry - very mememe - but I just need to throw it out there!

Joy you're so wise not wanting to know the due date, although you learned the hard way. So sorry, about the reminders and the frustration. Sneaky hug back at you. I actually worked mine out once I'd had my hcg levels which were very good at 16dpo. I was so excited, mainly about getting off the TTC train and unbelieving that it could happen to us. Well, of course you know the rest. It feels like a hole of sadness, I am really teary and am considering just getting the cry that needs to come out over and done with. I am working from home, so I can just read my diary from the days after the MC, I am sure that will set me off.

It is just so difficult, all the April and May babies that did come or will come, there have been 4 of them already and two more expected soon. I love my friends and the ones I continue seeing despite their pregnancy know about it all and are kind and considerate about it. But still. It is so unfair. We should have had babies the same age, we should have been able to share this time and the amazing experience. Instead their happiness just highlights what is missing for us. Holding our friends' newborn last week was amazing, but it made me feel once again how much I crave our own, physically as well.

Over the hols I could see us being happy as a couple, even if the TTC does never bear fruit. But now, I don't know. I just want it so much. It grates, the sadness, the loss, the desperate desire. And hearing about all the really early stuff makes me feel miserable. So no babies this weekend, no stress, I booked a nice (but not too posh) restaurant for tonight and will make sure I am ready to enjoy myself then.

Someone asked about IUI, next cycle, possibly probably in 2 weeks. So maybe I should seduce SB as well...

Sea are you up north too?

Lemon. V quick coffee queue post to say spoil yourself, don't feel you aren't allowed to feel sad. Then look to the future with an open heart. Luffs.

Mad that sounds perfect and very promising!

lemon it's ok to feel really really sad. You've been through a hell of a lot and it is so unfair that you aren't pregnant now. I do think that the lack of appointments and the fertility limbo you've been in may have made it even harder - I think that your IVF may be just the ticket. You know you can implant, so maybe the egg and sperm may just need a little help to get together and then be put back in the right spot. Paw squeeze.

sea I think maybe it's that there are more mixed race couples than there used to be (several of mine and MrC's pals here are what they call in the US 'interracial' couples) and there are also more common fertility isshoos so it looks like a correlation, even if it's not. I'd have thought it would be a good thing - more of a difference in genes - but I know zero about it. I can imagine it would be incredibly frustrating to not know why. It's been a comfort to me that I know exactly why I'm not getting pregnant (no egg = no baby) and I can't even begin to think how upsetting it would be to not have the answers. art on our board was unexplained and got her BFP from IVF. Sometimes there may be some tiny thing that we just don't know about that's preventing things from happening.

Welcome zippy, sounds like you will be a great addition to our gang! Sorry about the HSG - that sounds awful. Poor you.

gin hurrah for a heartbeat - oh wow how incredible to see it flickering away. Amazing. And how cute that your embie was curled up in a corner of its little sack. I know this time must be scary as hell but I have everything firmly crossed for you and MrGin, and I just hope the next few weeks fly past and you are able to relax and feel more positive.

sar thinking of you and hoping that you are ok and not too terrified. Just the loveliest news. I was looking at the beginning of this thread and how low you were, and it's amazing to know you are where you are now.

madness that is amazing news on the follies! High five! I think my lining was 9mm yesterday and they like it to be around 12 so yours sounds perfect. Will be SO nice to have your paw to clutch on Monday (or Tuesday, if that's when I go for EC). Brilliant. Slow and steady wins the race!

ramona good for you for asking for the monitoring. My doctor (a non fertility specialist) made me feel fussy for asking about it too when I did my first three rounds. I was intimidated to push for it, and I wish I had, as I didn't ovulate or respond to it and it was basically a waste of time - I wasted five months stressing on my own about it. If you have monitoring, they can see how you respond to it and alter the dose or move on to something else if it isn't working.

euro hope your flight home wasn't too knackering.

buzz at your frilly knickers and boots combo. I still think about that story and laugh! You have to pack some nice things for your trip.

joy I am sorry hon that you're having such a rotten time. I do think that a plan will help. It is a numbers game, it really is. I think the intensity of your experience in January and February was incredibly traumatic and now feeling lost in limbo must be awful. I wish this whole thing wasn't so expensive too, it's just one more incredibly stressful element.

Positive thoughts to nelly and mrsd, our PUPOs. nelly that sounds like fantastic news on the 4 cell embie. Just remember doll's golden egg! mrsd I have everything crossed for your twins .

Waves to rabbit and free - I have my final scan tomorrow morning and am slurping water and waddling about rather like a duck. The nurse yesterday told me my estradiol level was 1011. No idea what that means but I feel like I am mega constipated. Will actually be quite a relief to do the EC! Also finding it hard to concentrate at work. It's MrC's birthday today so I may try to leave early and get started on his birthday supper (scallops with bacon, strawberries and cream, soft squishy cheese).

Okay I'm back.

seaview try not to give up on things happening naturally. Sorry about your difficult chats. I have to admit I am a bit at £100k on ivf. We have been incredibly lucky to be offered treatment on the nhs but even if we hadn't been able to wait for that £15k (three attempts) was my absolute limit before accepting that adoption was the next step. I suppose other people would feel that that is also a ridiculous amount of money so it is all relative. If i could afford £100 maybe i would reconsider....... Re: the smoking during pregnancy rage - I have spoken before about the signs plastered all over my clnic's window about not smoking outside. I have a feeling it's to stop incredibly hormonal women like me from running out the clinic and punching someone. It makes me all .

lemon I am so sorry that you are feeling so low. It is completely understandable and I think you just have to ride it out and accept it for what it is. You got a lot closer than I ever have to getting your happy ending and it is natural that you are still grieving the loss. Moving forward with a plan is the best approach, but for now be kind to yourself xx

joy I'm sorry you too are in the doldrums. These things come in waves and it will get better but sometimes it's hard to see the forest for the trees.... When is your appointment again?

nelly how are you feeling tonight? I hope that you are being pampered . mrsd said she felt numb but I can't imagine how I'm going to feel come ET. I am just so focused on getting through EC and then finding out if anything fertilises. Even knowing that I have a good number of eggs isn't enough to stop me thinking that it could still all go wrong.

critter paw is at the ready!

buzzy I did have to at your frilly knickers! I agree that you should pack nice things for your trip. I bout new slippers and jammies for my lap and it did make me feel better afterwards to have nice things to put on. Silly, but true. What is your timetable looking like?

AFM my brain has turned to mush and I actually forgot to ring the clinic to confirm that everything was staying the same after my blood tests this morning. Had a missed call when I got out of work and managed to catch the nurse before they left for the weekend! Thankfully she was lovely and we had a little laugh about it. She blamed it on the drugs. Everything was fine and we are booked in for egg collection at 11:30am Monday. I have now set an alarm for tomorrow night to make sure that I don't forget to take the trigger at half past midnight tomorrow night . Clinic was standing room only this morning . There are a lot of infertile people around here.....

Sorry for not mentioning everyone. Off for a girly dinner out. Have a lovely weekend all!!!!

ok I'm totally late to the party but Well Done Sarlat

Hello free, was wondering how things were with you!

madness hope the girly dinner was lovely. Is totally understandable you'd be forgetful now, you have a lot on your mind. Wow at midnight trigger!

Gin I'm so pleased everything looked good at the scan, and the symptoms sound v encouraging. I hope I can be a positive stat for our clinic one day. :)

sar when does 6 weeks fall?

Hurrah for being PUPO Nelly.

Welcome Ramona. If malbec and chocolate were the cure for infertility, I would have a litter by now....

buzz my next period is due around 10 May, so all being well, we would be starting scans and the lead up to EC about a week after that. I'm loving the sound of your knicker collection. I have a ridiculous amount too, but they are rather more substantial than the wisps I used to wear back in the day! I do have a special ttc collection to get us in the mood after long days at work though... You must be off to Brno very soon. I completely understand your point about looking forward to it being over.

Critter how are you feeling today? Happy birthday to Mr C. I'm amazed that you are managing to throw a party whilst incubating a huge clutch of eggs! You are wonderwoman!

mrsd you are completely right - we are all more optimistic about others than we are about ourselves. How are you doing?

joy it's possible I'm another one in that odd category. I had what I think was a chem preg, while we were using the withdrawal method in the run up to our wedding, just before we started trying properly. And then nothing.

I've always been bizarrely pessimistic about our chances too, long before we started ttc.

madness I'm glad everything was looking good on the scan. Good luck for EC!

lemon I'm so sorry about your due date. Mr euro got an announcement from a work colleague yesterday. She's older than me, very overweight and got married not that long ago. If she's announcing now, I'm guessing she's a week or two behind where I would have been.

sea I would have thought being mixed race would be a good thing from mother nature's pov - it's mixing unsimilar genes (as I have just seen Critter has suggested too), which is generally a good thing.

free how are you doing?

Morning everyone

Thanks critter, I hate making a fuss (and having more appointments than necessary) but I'd be interested to see what's going on after taking clomid, since I seem to ovulate on my own. I hope MrC had a lovely birthday and a great party, and that you are doing ok

Sar, after some advice from this very thread MrR and I have been talking about looking into iui, so that may be our next step. I hope you are doing ok? When is your poas date? Sending sticky thoughts your way.

Yay for pupo nelly!

Thanks for the welcome buzzy. Love your stories about kayla. I had a gorge ginger tom cat who loved to catch flies in his mouth and run around with them still buzzing. Big horrible bluebottles. Gross.

Thinking of you lemon this weekend. I have been with friends on what would have been their due dates, and I know it is shitty. I hope you are ok and are doing things that make you happy this weekend.

Joy, your post about negativity versus intuition really struck a chord. I'm the same. I get really cross with being told to think positive when I feel like I already know that I'm out for another month, but I couldn't tell you if it's being negative or not. I am so positive for everyone else, but don't feel the same about our own situation. I feel sure you'll get that happy ending though.

Euro at the litter

Af got me this morning so have decided that (once the painkillers kick in and the austen-esque melodrama subsides) this weekend will be all about shopping, wine and an long lunch with mrR tomorrow. To be honest, I'm feeling crappy and reeling a bit after three announcements in the past week. I'll blame the pmt but i know it's not just that. Anyway, in much happier news, I'm going to see my gorgeous niece and nephew later and they never fail to cheer me up.

Hello to everyone else. Wishing you all good weekends, hope it's sunny where you are...

lemons I am sorry that you are feeling low at the moment. I can imagine how awful it must feel. I hope that your meal out cheered you up a bit or at the very least you managed to eat your own body weight in desert!

euro Jeez at the preggo announcement. There really does seem to be no rhyme or reason as to why for some people it is like falling off a log, even though on paper they ought to find it more difficult.

sea 100K on treatment - wow! Not sure how well that would sit with me even if we could find anything approaching that sort of cash.

madness good luck with the trigger shot. Mine was really late at night too and I was paranoid about falling asleep. Apparently the timing is really crucial so an alarm is a good idea.
I understand the numb thing too and felt like that and also, like you, was focussed on the fertilisation bit. It felt for most of it like I was holding my breath. The ET was almost like a relief and I remember feeling really, really great when I came out of the clinic. If I can't have a baby then putting that day on loop would be the next best thing

critter your egg number is awesome. Bloody hell! Hope that Mr(Hot!)Critter had a good birthday.

buzzy Yuk at Kayla and her flies BigDog is terrified of anything that buzzes.

Thinking of you nelly and mrsd. BTW I love the PUPO tag though I admit that I too didn't get it at first!

Welcome zippy Sorry about the HSG.

Hello Ramona. Boo to shitty AF but good that you will have some distraction today in the from of little people.

AF got me this morning after messing me around for over a week In honesty after 9 days of period pains and no other PMT symptoms I had dared to hope especially when the light spotting stopped for the second time last night & given that I thought I had ovulated much, much earlier than I obviously had. Ah well, I really ought to know better but can't help feeling a bit fed up that for any "normal" TTC'er this scenario would have had a much different ending.

Love and waves to all

Oh Pout I'm so sorry about cruel trickery from AF. I think I've written those very words about if it has been any normal ttc'er. It is so shockingly unfair; and more and more I realise, as Art said earlier in the week, it's pure dumb luck. I still wail about it but most of the time I've stopped beating myself up about what I might have done wrong etc etc. but remember, sometimes the luck turns, like Sar. And sometimes FET works, . But cd1 is always hard no matter what. I proffer the homemade cereal bars I've not actually made yet .

Ramona sounds good about looking into IUI.

Oh Mad I think I forgot you were NHS. I saw a really nice consultant there who was at pains to remind me that even with low AMh I can still get pregnant every month and some other interesting titbits about potential changes to the funding such as private attempts not counting against NHS goes. He was Dr D. The consultant I had a crap experience with was a Dr T. I think he actually heads up that NHS dept but also the nearby private one: and he is an arse. He was entirely dismissive after my AMh; called me at work to give me the great news, would only do LP but even then didn't make me feel very optimistic. Kept saying "I've done research" in a smug way which sounded to us like "I am right and I won't consider anything else".

Anyway hooray for EC. Like Pout the ET day for me was a great one. I was so nervous that there would be nothing to transfer. We've given our 4 cells a nickname and woke up this morning wondering if it was 8 cells yet. I feel optimistic and PUPO and I intend to hang on to this feeling for as long as I can. This might be the only "pregnant" I ever get and I intend to enjoy being spoiled by MrN what I can.

Good luck for the party Critter and also for triggers and EC.

Have fought with phone for long enough. Going back out to the garden to enjoy our little bit of sun.

Lemons-so sorry you are sad. Due dates do feel difficult. I hope you got the tears out of your system and managed to enjoy a scrummy meal. I know you have had a slow return to ac since the mc. But sweetheart you can conceive and you WILL again.

Nelly -woohoo for a peeeeeerfect embryo on board. Wishing it growth and bedding in vibes. Make sure you do some fun things these next 2 weeks.

Madness -wow, 10 follies is great news. What a relief. Sounds like you are in good hands. Good luck for Monday, nothing to stop you now.

Joy - so sorry that these awful feelings persist. It is a lonely lonely place to be and so hard to break out of. I will pm you soon.

Free - thank you. Hope you are well.

Sea -your weekend plans sound lovely and will hopefully make you feel better after a hard week.

Euro -really sorry about that announcement. Its hard not to think back to where your pregnancy would have been, I know. Just a matter of time for you sweetheart.

Buzz -wow thats a lot of knickers. Hope all the plans are falling in to place now.

Pout -gah, so sorry about stupid af. Big big hugs. I wonder if your body is still adjusting post ivf.

6 weeks is today and scan is monday. Worried its a little early but took what I was offered. Been waking up with a 'hangover' just recently which I am hoping is a prego sign.

Helloooooo to all

afternoon ladies, i'm sitting in the hairdresses gaetting a new barnet, and quietly recovering from a works do last night

sar i'm sure all will be fine at your scan on Monday

pout sorry the bitch has arrived and at big dog

sea how many goes did they have for £100k

euro your next bfp is just round the corner, I have to say this year is flying by for me

free how are you

well the sun is shining and i'm feeling pretty happy and excited about things, mainly just my life in general, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, either way I can put all this ttc crap behind us
right now our biggest problem is Kayla she had a mahoosive tantrum this morning about her food and the new feeding system we are trying to trial for when we are away, I can assure you it was not a success, so its all expensive brands that she likes while we are away for little miss madame

nelly Sunshine????? Splutters and looks despondently out of the window. I'm contemplating turning on the light here it's so dark and dismal.
I love your nickname idea. I admit to laying in bed thinking that I ought to name the frostie but the only name that keeps coming to my mind is Colin for some reason I must admit that I knew very little about the cell multiplication thing but it is fascinating to think on what is happening right now. BTW thank you joycep about the info further upthread about IVF implantation. Anyway massively thinking of you nelly and all you other lovely IVF'ers.

Sarlat Huge good luck with your scan on Monday. Do let us know what it was like to see your little bean on TV!
I was going to say boo to feeling hungover but actually hurrah! Feeling like poo on a stick means you're diffed
I definitely think that I must be adjusting post IVF. I still feel a bit fed up though that I thought I had given loads of leeway for AFs likely arrival date but yet here she is when I thought I might be out of the woods. Not too down though. Homemade pizza for dinner and peanut butter cupcakes.

buzzy x-posted with you. Hairdressers, what a brilliant idea. New barnet, new start.
My sister's cat would only countenance Whiskers pouches. Expensive! Tantruming pets seems to be a theme this weekend. Big Dog is massively on one too. As soon a MrP leaves the house he literally harumphs off to the downstairs loo, barging straight through the uber stylish plastic folding door with his f* you face on. He will come out from time to time to lunge aggressively at Little Dog and then buggers off back to sulk. Not sure what me and Little Dog have done

Lemon It breaks my heart to see you so sad. It takes time to get over losses and you must take as much time as you need. It was me who asked about the IUI. Hopefully that will take your mind off the past and more importantly get you diffed!! Have a lovely weekend with Mr Lemon. [tightsqueeze]

Nelly ? No I am in London but it really did hail stone for about 5 minues on Fri afternoon and then it was sunshine again?

Critter ? hope MrC had a lovely birthday. You are brave to be doing the AC and have a party at the same time. I hope you are feeling okay! Enjoy the party if you are having it this weekend. I think you are probably right that there are just many more mixed (or interracial) couples around. Maybe because MrS & I are one such couple that we know more people that are the same. I should know not to draw conclusions from what looks like a correlation. I think being unexplained definitely hasn?t helped my need to find answers.

Madness ? It?s understandable to be forgetful. It?s a lot to deal with. How do you feel about EC on Monday? I am excited and rooting for you! I think 100k is a scary amount of money to spend on IVF but they were very happy with it and now have a beautiful boy. It was a long road for them but I guess their perseverance paid off. She had to give up work to focus on the IVF as they went overseas in the end. I can?t even imagine that level of commitment.

Free ? welcome back How have you been? I think you are doing Chinese meds to warm the body after your IUI last time ? no? What are you next steps?

Euro ? I know being mixed race should be a good thing because of the different gene pool aspect but I just know so many mixed race couples struggling fertility wise. As I said before, I am probably reading too much into it and just looking for answers to questions that perhaps I won?t find.

Pout ? sorry about the red witch messing you around. It?s very frustrating when she is late and gives false hope.

Sar ? can?t believe you are at 6 weeks already. This is really lovely news. Hope the scan goes well. Can?t wait to hear all about it!

Buzzy ? I don?t know how many rounds of IVF they had for 100k. I think 4 were with the controversial DrT which resulted in a pregnancy every time but she mc each time. In the end they got pregnant overseas. Hearing their ttc e journey put the fear in me and although they have a happy ending, I wish I hadn?t heard it. Good luck with your trip. I hope Kayla enjoys her gourmet cat food.

Waves to Ramona, rabbit, joy and everyone else I have missed. Must dash...

x

I just seem to be in a pocket of infertility. I know loads of people who have struggled in one way or another. Only one of those couples is mixed race and they had a male factor problem. I completely understand the search for answers though. I've said on here many times that I find being unexplained incredibly difficult, even though I know IVF can work for us.

Sneaks in whispering as everyone else is doubtless asleep..... Apart from perhaps critter with her time difference . My trigger shot has been done and now I cannot sleep. MrM is not having this problem, his snoring will attest to that! So all injections done and the antibiotics start tomorrow. All feeling very real just now. Had a lovely walk by the sea today and then an impromptu dinner party. Very nice day with sunny skies.

critter I hope the party was lovely and a good time was had by all.

pout I really understand what you're saying about wanting to hold on to that positive feeling. I have been afraid to hope for fear of disappointment but when I walked out of the clinic after my second scan, knowing that we were going to get something out of this, I felt so relaxed and happy. Even if this all goes badly I am glad that I got to feel that again. I haven't felt hopeful for a long time and I miss it. I'll feel rubbish if it doesn't work no matter what and in this whole process good days are priceless. Sorry the big dog is making you feel unloved. Good preparation for when your wee one decides - as they inevitably do at some point - that they like daddy best! Oh, and Colin???

lemon I have a new consultant at the clinic called DrD but he is new to the place altogether I think. My specialist is DrB and he's lovely. I'll see him again when this is all over to come up with a long term plan for managing the endo. Haven't had any contact with DrT but I am not impressed with his attitude. I think sometimes when they deal with this everyday they forget that for us this is all consuming and horrible to go through and that we are putting our future families in their hands. You absolutely must enjoy being pupo - like I said to pout we need to take the optimism and happiness whenever we can. I will pm you to try and arrange that north of the border meet up xx

mrsd how are you feeling now? When is otd? I'm sure you've said by my memory is like a sieve....

sar good luck for the scan. I have every confidence that things will be perfect.

euro I know quite a few infertile folk as well. Maybe I know of more because I keep blabbing it to people and they then feel like it's ok to tell me . How are you doing with recovering from the jet lag? I find it hardest coming back this was from North America. I could never do a job that required frequent transatlantic flights. I am really excited for your next round. Doing it naturally sounds so much better and you have proven that it can work for you.

buzzy I have been debating getting my hair blow dried on occasion just to make me feel better. Tis quite unruly so only the hairdresser can properly tame it and I feel a million dollars when I leave the salon. If only I could take the hairdresser home. So glad that you are feeling positive. You are going to have a fab trip.

sea try not to let it scare you. Everyone's journey will be different and it doesn't help to compare says the woman who panics daily about what the future will bring. I am glad that your friends are happy with their decision and that it has all worked out for them in the end. I would be afraid that if I gave up my career and it didn't work I would feel that I had totally lost myself to this process ifyswim.

lemon thinking of you this weekend. I hope you have nice distracting things planned and that the sun shines where you are.

ramona hope the visit with little people was a success and cheered you up but sorry about af.

Big waves to rabbit, free, joy and anyone else that I have missed. Off to try and get some sleep....

Just popping in to say hello to madness, yay for triggering! And hurrah for sarlat's 6 week scan, and sorry about bad doggy behavior to pout. Buzz I bet the new hair is fab, I did laugh at Kayla eating a fly whole, and alive. Like cat sushi maybe?

Morning everyone. Thank you for all the lovely welcomes :-)

Wow Sar, I can't believe they wanted to whip out your tubes when they could be fixed. That is scary beyond belief. Well done for having a great instinct and sticking to your guns. I don't have a great deal of faith in the 2 fertility docs I've seen so far. I was told that I was ovulating normally but during one of the apps it came up that some of my cycles were shorter than 24 days. I was then told that I probably wasn't ovulating in those cycles. The OPK's gave me smiley faces though so I don't know. All very confusing. I may mention the lap at the next app but I've felt that anything I do suggest at apps (I go with a long list of queries fuelled by Google!) is sort of poo poo'd and they hold up their 'IVF is the answer' billboard. Maybe it is. Anyway, good luck for your Monday scan. I'm very excited for you!

Buzzybee, I love hearing about Kayla's adventures (or misadventures!) and your frilly knicker drawer sounds like something to behold :-D Are you planning IVF abroad very soon?

Hi Lemons, I'm sorry you're feeling low with a due date looming. I find it depressing when I think of some friends who got pregnant after my mc and now have 2 or 3 children. Did you have IVF and are you gearing up for another go? Btw I had an absolute corker of an argument with MrBopit the other day. I have been really down and teary recently but pmt turned that into a crazy rage. I just got so furious and frustrated at our situation and turned into a total brat. It culminated in MrBopit trying to remove me from a room by pulling me out by my foot (we'll make great parents) at which point we got a grip and took a break. We hee haw'd for ages and ages later about how disfunctional it all was :-) Then we had a good heart to heart where he opened up to being pretty depressed about the whole thing too which weirdly made me feel a bit better. Anyway huge hugs for Sunday, I hope you are distracted by lovely things all day. X

Hi Joy, lovely to meet you. I've not had vit d tested but I will go and google the importance of that straight after this post! I've searched and pondered and driven myself a tiny bit bonkers looking for a reason for the infertility. I have me and MrBopit on various supplements but I think the problem may be greater than that and I'm just born before a time where the medics can figure it out. I was interested in what you were saying about intuition. I went to a website by a lady (who was trying to sell a motivational DVD so everything with a pinch of salt..) and she was talking about 'believing' you would get preggers and suggested buying a small item ? like a pair of baby socks ? and looking at them every day and getting excited about the prospect. Sounds mighty dangerous on the whole emotional front to me but it's food for thought. My cousin struggled with infertility and swears blind that it was only after she created a 'baby space' in her house that she fell pregnant. Coincidence? I'm quite cynical but I haven't ruled out trying to be more positive ;-) What's your next step?

Critterpants, MrsDen, Madness and Nelly ? thinking of you all. I'm finding the terminology re the stages of IVF a bit confusing but it sounds like its going well for all of you. I'm excited for you!

Hi Ramona, snap! AF came for me yesterday too. I just wanted to say you are not making a fuss with asking for a scan taking the clomid! I was given the clomid as a kind of afterthought really because everything seemed to show I was ovulating. The instruction from the doctor was to start with a 50mg dose and for the first month to get a scan on day 10 and not to have sex before that. They have to make sure your ovaries don't go nuts and release lots of eggs and they all fertilise and you have an octuplets situation on your hands :-O Or they may up the dose if there's no response. I've not taken it yet because I can't really get my head around why? I've booked a scan twice then bottled out of taking it and had to cancel. Drugs sort of freak me out. I don't even take asprin so I will probably struggle with the IVF cocktail of drugs when the time comes :-( Nice to meet you anyway and hopefully your bfp is right around the corner :-)

Sorry this is a shockingly long post and I've not even said hello to everyone. Hello and lovely wishes to those I've missed! I'd better go and get on with my Sunday xxx