Excellent Egg Buddies continued! Anyone having IVF/ICSI in Jan, Feb and March 2013 please join us!

[fairypangolin]

We've run out of room on Karbea's Jan IVF thread and it is too much fun to stop! We're all getting into comfy clothes and enjoying the side effects and surprises (and occasionally some hand holding).

That sounds very positive delilah. I'm so glad things are getting brighter for you.

Lovely stories! I'm surprised so many started on line. We met at school... Only got together in the drunken parties summer after leaving, and had a good few years of gap year and different unis to get through - long distance sucks. 12 years later and here we are, a belly full of eggs and a date with a cup on Friday!!

OK, can I get opinions on icsi. Last year between April and July duh had three sperm analyses. Count, volume, and motility v high, morphology 3-4%, so borderline, said the NHS. Unclear if these things balance each other out. A month ago he had a repeat, count 70m/ml, vol 5ml, motility normal, morphology 9%. So normal, we are told, and great, we think, ivf not icsi.

But the clinic are pushing icsi. We've not consented and said they have to talk to us on Friday if the sample is bad. I don't know if it's that they like to do icsi as standard, so they know eggs will fertilise, or if it's because it's, a bit, more expensive.

I'd be so interested in other people's advice or experience. We are thinking to insist on ivf unless the sample is v bad, but what is that?!

Agghh I just did a post and it disappeared again! Here goes again. Sorry if by the time I write this it appears and I've posted twice.

I am also enjoying the love stories. It is good to know that we all have loving support at home. I also could not have imagined having a family before DP and even though our journey has been difficult I'm so grateful to have him. I want to have his baby so much. He is also handsome dildals so hopefully we will all have good looking children sooner or later.

Del I'm so happy that you are gradually in the mend. It will take time but at least you are formulating a positive plan. Fingers crossed you are right and 2013 holds healthy, happy pregnancies for all of us.

Scarlett I hope you are feeling better.

AFM I'm so bored at work I'm gearing up for my 4th wee of the morning. At least drinking all this water is giving me something to do. I wish I was with you all having a nice cup of tea (decaf obv) and cake (gluten, dairy, egg free for me). Hhhmmm at least the conversation would be tasty!

Shazza xxx

Hello Keep guys also told us that we have to have ICSI but havent really said why. It is £1000 more but at this stage I'm just going with their advice. At the info evening im sure they said that 70% of their cycles are ICSI. I hadn't really thought about whether it is better or not. When we asked about the risks involved the dr said that the chance of abnormalities is very slim and they don't know if it would be the same with ivf using the same sperm as the sperm needing ICSI is slightly below par anyway.

Fingers crossed for you either way. Xx

With those numbers there is no way I would bother with ICSI.

After 3 SAs, which were told were all fine (although I was aware that they were at the low end of normal and was always surprised that the drs were not bothered about this and kept focussing on me), we were told as I came round from EC, groggy as hell, that the sample wasn't great and the clinic suggested ICSI. The couple through the curtain who had been just before me were being told the same thing. I think they said yes. We said no. Our egg fertilised, so it seems to have been the right decision for us. I am very sceptical because it is something you pay extra for - the clinic had assured us beforehand that they only suggested ICSI if there was a good reason, etc etc, and I am rather annoyed that it was sprung on us when we were in such a vulnerable position. His SA was marginally worse than previous ones but not hugely different (btw, motility, morphology etc were all fine, but his was 13m/ml and only 1.1ml volume, so 14m swimmers total versus 350m in your husband's sample).

Mr Euro is particularly annoyed about this and I think would like to change clinic ideally (he really didn't like having his spaff quality discussed when other couples could overhear, and felt they were trying to get us to pay for extras when we were vulnerable). However, I want to stay where we are, because I find medical procedures very stressful and I think the familiarity of the rooms and the staff will make it marginally easier next time, and he gets that.

Thanks euro, really appreciate it. I agree that that was a bad time and way to bring it up. Also suspicious the other couple were told the same thing. I hate having to be sceptical that it could be about money... I sort of feel if its ivf it might be a stronger sperm that finds the egg, whereas some might just look good...

Thanks Sharon. Given guys do Nhs too it can't all be about the money then... Sigh, why is there no Proper Guidance.

My gut feeling is its not about the money but about fertilization rates though.

I'm going to see what studies have been done, but really helpful to know what they tell you elsewhere.

keep I have no advice on ICSI sorry. Have no clue on DH's stats, but it was all 'normal' and Guys didn't offer us ICSI. Then again we were on the NHS so there wasn't anything in it for them.

Hmm I guess that one advanage of still having my NHS funding - they won't try to get me to do anything that costs more money unless it's necessary!

We were asked to sign the ICSI forms at the start, we did but just because if it is necessary then I don't want them to have to wait for us to sign forms etc, I don't know now though - they said they would only do it if required but with 3 eggs they may think that justifies 'required' without first considering egg & sperm quality rather than quantity iykwim.

In most countries ICSI is standard procedure I read somewhere, the UK is apparently an exception in preferring IVF. OH is of the opinion, why not give it the best shot, and I guess ICSI is the best shot at getting fish'n'egg together!

I try not to think about the ethics of it, if I start thinking about it too much I freak out about the whole thing being unnatural so it's a little bit of ostrich-style from me...

*that's one advantage

hi all - just dropping in to say you are all amazing in how you are dealing with the ivf rollercoaster. I am really impressed. It is good to hear from you, delilah in particular.

keep my husband's stats were motility on the low side, morphology on the low side (4-5%), volume low (1ml) but actual count v high (240m/ml). No one ever suggested ICSI to us and I have read that morphology alone is not a factor to determine ICSI because it is so subjective, what looks like a 'normal' sperm to one person may not to another. Our consultant said they don't use ICSI unless necessary because it is invasive of the egg. However I have read online that it increases fertilisation rates overall so it's a bit of a crap shoot either way.

euro I don't blame Mr Euro for being annoyed at having such a sensitive topic discussed audibly in a room with other people in it!

dildals I am constantly hungry too but it is balanced out by the constant low level nausea. By the evening I feel utterly dreadful. Breasts aren't sore any more but they are a good cup size larger than a few weeks ago. Still I am not complaining, no sirree!

I'm confused now cause we have been told all along that my tests are fine and DPs are ok except for a little bit low morphology. Now we have to have ICSI. I was thinking it might be because my old eggs are abit tough and the little fellows need help cracking through. Oh well we are doing it now.

I agree with fairy. I'm enjoying myself on here with you all I almost forget why we are all here. I'm so inspired by you all and all your stories. You are all coping so well even if the news hasn't been positive. This thread had definitely changed my perception of ivf and shaped the way that I am approaching my treatment. I simply don't know how I would do this on my own. Thank you all for being so open and candid and generous enough to share your ups and downs Here's to us! xx

fairy my boobs were looking fantastic about a week ago, but now they look normal again, not really much bigger, and defo not a cupsize! The hunger comes for a couple of days and then goes again. And although I do have that low level queasiness it is not enough to put me off my food. I WANT SOME PROPER SYMPTOMS DAMMIT! ;-)

What do you think, would it make sense to set up a separate IVF pregnancy thread? One that just worries rather than talk about disposable vs cloth nappies? ;-)

Dildals on my brief soujourn on the Oct 2013 ante-natal thread, it crossed my mind that it might be useful to have an IVF worriers thread. I was completely agog at people feeling comfortable talking about maternity clothes and baby names at just a few weeks out.

shazza especially the candid conversations about bum bullets and sex are priceless.

euro I know! I fell off my chair when I saw that that Oct 2013 thread existed barely days in to BFP territory. Do these people not know anything about jinxing? ;-)

I do think IVF'ers seem to have a fair few things in common, from reading the posts on this site, so might be worthwhile. I will give it a ponder tonight. Because I am SO productive at work already!

This may sound strange but I will sort of miss my bum bullets ...

I joined the ante-natal thread very quickly because I was so excited to finally be "in the club" after waiting for so long. I'm glad I did even though it was painful to have to ask to be removed from the list. It made it seem more real to be part of a group all going through the same things.

Dildals that does not so much sound strange as absolutely batst1t mental! I can bear the things! I hate sanitary towels at the best of times (I'm a mooncup girl), but since getting my BFP I have used dozens of the things. The actually make me quite sore. I walk a lot and find they chafe and are just uncomfy. The mess can be avoided by using the back entrance but given the scar tissue I have from surgery back there plus the delightful preggo piles, that is only done occasionally (for scans and when I want to dtd!) as it is pretty painful.

can't bear not can bear!

I may as well come out with it ... I have formed a bum bullet dependency ... ;-)

I know what you mean euro, it's just I didn't feel they were going through the same things as I was. They all had shitloads of symptoms, massive bellies, super morning sickness, mammoth mammaries. They weren't far off discussing TENS machines vs gas.

My bum bullet, although I like the name, doesn't go up the back-end. And I don't use the sanitary towels eitehr. They're a bit messy, but not that much (for me), or maybe I am just a mucky pup.

One bum bullet tip for Newbies who are taking one along when out on the town - don't put it in your jeans pocket. They warm up and melt ... now THAT is messy to try and stick up your foof! (put it in a cold drink for a bit is my advice)

dildals I think low level nausea combined with starvation is a normal, proper preggo symptom. It's kind of like you're hungover, every day. I also am still waking up 4 x a night to go to the loo, what about you?

I definitely will not miss the cyclogest. I had the same problem as you, euro with chafing from sanitary towels and I have now gone and bought 6 pairs of cheap pants from Primark (one pound each!) and just accept they will be ruined with the waxy drip.

I have been looking at the Oct 2013 ante natal thread from time to time but they are such a wide range of people it felt a bit impersonal. Also i agree that most seemed v 'into' being pregnant in a way that i just don't feel ready for. Would be happy to join your new thread Dildals!

Oooh have we come so far that we need a grads thread already? 'citin

But if there is no bum bullet up there surely the babies will just fall out! ;-)

Yes, still waking up for a wee early every morning, back to bed for more sleep, unless I urgently need to research one of my worries. Not four times though!

Oh and low level nausea combined with starvation sounds like half the diets I've tried...

dildals even when not pg I have to get up at least once for a wee at night as I have a bladder the size of a grape. So I don't think my 4 x reflects anything other than that, it's the fact of the increase that's the pg symptom.

scarlett this is a very ineffectual diet because I've gained half a stone while on it! Well, at least i have since starting IVF, I forced myself on the scale this morning. Sigh.

it's old age fairy ;-)