Rainbow babies. Remembering our angels, riding the rollercoaster and hoping for little rainbows and sunshine.

[Little9]

An angel in the book of life wrote down our babies births. And whispered as she closed the book...too beautiful for this earth.

Fingers crossed for rainbows and BFPs for everyone!

littlestar welcome to the thread, but also so sorry that you find yourself here. Your Finn does sound perfect.
My daughter Ophelia was still born at 36 weeks two years ago next month, we have also had two early miscarraiges since then, and I now find myself 7 weeks pregnant. I hope your ttc journey is a short one, but we will be here for however long it takes and also for the pregnancy and the journey after.

poppet one of my good friends is going through IVF treatment at the moment, she has had her eggs harvested and has six good embryos, but they had to freeze them all as her ovaries had not shrunk back to size after all the hormones. How is it all going?

green wow your day really is being tough on you, Im glad in the end your baby showed its heartbeat. Your poor mum I hope shes ok.

cheese so good to have you back and with maybe two littles ones growing! Wow, fingers crossed you have a sticky bean or two in there. Im here to fret with you.

littlestar unless it's an extremely unlikely coincidence, I am pretty sure we already know each other I will just send you a text to find out for sure! xx

cheese a quiet, fingers-crossed 'congrats! twins!!!!!!' coming in your direction from me... all of this lovely news on the thread at the moment. Truly, gives me hope. I so so hope all will continue to be well, I know it's very early but we'll all be hoping for you.

green what a day. Your poor mum, your poor little boys, and most of all, actually, poor you. Please come on here to calm yourself/rant/offload whenever you can over the next few days. So sorry you are having to deal with all of this - I really hope your mum's condition is much better than feared. And I'm SO glad you did hear the heartbeat today xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

fan how are you today? All going ok here so far, ta. Your friend sounds like she's having a stressful time of it with the IVF; I guess they're aiming to do a FET once her ovaries have sorted themselves out - I hope it works for them.

I was right.
And she's LOVELY, by the way.
xxxxxxxx

Oh my goodness cheese congratulations a double rainbow surprise! Fingers crossed everything goes smoothly!

littlestar sorry to see you here but very welcome. Please tell us about your little one when you want to.

razz congratulations too!

fan how are you lovely lady?

I think little miss L is teething already, she's quite grumpy when she's not on the boob and dribbling loads and chewing everything.
She's also a bottle refuser which doesn't make it easy when I need to leave her to do some work stuff :(

Oh my goodness - just had a catch up of the last few days and wow to Razz and Cheese lovely wonderful news both of you (though yours makes me a little nervous Razz as I've been thinking about having a coil fitted - I'm not sure I'd cope with an unexpected surprise atm!) possible twins cheese quiet squeeee!

Littlestar I'm so sorry you find yourself here and what a coincidence that you know lovely kleine already! Finn sounds absolutely perfect. I hope your ttc journey is a short one. We lost our 2nd dd Erin 18 months ago shortly after her birth to cancer. I'm lucky enough to have a 6yr old dd and also went on to have a 3rd dd 7 months ago. It's so hard but there is hope xx

Green my lovely - any news on your mum. What happened? Did she have a fall? MW appt sounds massively stressful - I remember it well waiting to hear the hb I had a similar appt at around 16 weeks - they're still so small and tricky to catch at that stage. Huge hugs to you xx

Kleine how are you my friend? It must be hard building up to the ivf xx

Angel how are things with you? xx

Today you are pregnant Fan xxxx

Love hearing about Finn and Lotta Mias and Blue and seeing their gorgeous pictures on fb. H was a bottle refuser at first blue but had to persevere because of me going back to work and eventually she took to it and now we have no problems at all.

How are you babyh? hope your SIL has wound her neck in!

How was Theas 2nd birthday Too? xxx

Thinking of you Elly home straight now. We're all here to help you through the last few weeks xxx

Loved the bump pics rainbox How are you feeling? xx

Being back at work is knackering and I miss my lovely long Holly days soooo much. Its definitely harder juggling two kids and ft work and all of K's activities. Tomorrows my half day though, can't wait to have some time with my girls! Thankfully we're all over the horrid sickness bug that seemed to wipe out everyone we had been in contact with!! Taking K and her little friends to Sleeping Beauty on Ice on Saturday for her birthday treat - she's very excited as am I

Lots of love to all xxxx

Hi everyone, I have just had a LONG read of the thread and I have to say I am totally overwhelmed at the kindness and support you have all shown each other. I feel like I "know" you all after reading these posts. Sorry not to name check (I will get better with time I promise) but I am so so sad to hear about your beautiful angel children and also very happy for those with Rainbows here or on the way, it gives me hope that the future may hold some happiness to go along with the sadness that we will all carry forever.

Special big thank you to Kleine for endorsing me! And also a big hello to Mias as our sons share the same name. It did bring a little wateryness to my eyes, but also maybe me smile as I like to think my Finn would have had some of the qualities of yours, he sounds like a wonderful boy.

Thank you for being so welcoming, lots of love and hugs to everyone xx

hello back littlestar. I am so sorry that you find yourself here, and that your own little Finn is not with you. It is heartbreaking. My beautiful little redhead, Mia, died unexpectedly at the age of 13 months in October 2011, and her little rainbow brother, Finn, was born last December, 13 months later. These ladies here have been wonderful before and throughout my pregnancy, and I do feel like they are true friends. Finally - thank you for acknowledging my own Finn, it is very generous of you. xx

cheese ooooo!!

green what a worrying day for you. How is your mother now?

We heard tonight that SIL has had a baby girl. So happy for them, but it was a funny feeling, because she thought she was having a boy. Somewhere in my brain, I obviously have a black spot - although I was happy for them all, I suddenly wanted my little girl very badly too, and resented the fact that she had hers and I didn't have my own sunshiny, noisy girl. MrMia and I had a little cry together.

Hi ladies,

Have been keeping an eye on the thread whilst I've been away. I'm glad we came-although Mother's Day was still very hard, I think it was easier being away with just DH. I think it's true what they say about sunshine being good for you too Think it is helping me deal with today, which is 3 months since I had and lost my darling girl. And hope it will help with my 30th birthday tomorrow too. Am glad to not be surrounded by people making a well intended fuss.

babyh Thank you for your stories- they are very helpful and give me hope. I'm sorry that your SIL is so insensitive - I actually can't believe she did that- so selfish.

Fan Green Elly Rainbox Razz - continue to pray for you each day as you get closer to holding your gorgeous rainbows.

Kleine Thinking of you as you start the IVF - hoping for a quick positive result for you.

Cheese Wow how exciting! Have everything crossed for you

green hope your mum is ok- poor thing. Hopefully it's not too serious.

Miasmum Well done for raising all that money for Mia's wood. Just wonderful.

Too I hope Thea's birthday passed gently for you both. 2 years is an unbelievably long time to be without her.

Littlestar I'm so sorry that you find yourself here. Finn sounds absolutely beautiful and I'm so sorry he's not with you where he should be. We lost our first baby, our darling Isla in December at 38 weeks. She was stillborn but they couldn't find a reason why. Just a terrible accident. I miss her every minute of the day. We are thinking of Ttc in the summer. Being on this thread with these lovely ladies is really helping me to cope and I hope it helps you too.

Hello to everyone I've missed - hope you are all ok. xxxxxxxx

Also Mia I'm sorry that the birth of your niece made you so sad- it's so difficult isn't it? I know you are happy for them but at same time makes you miss your beautiful girl even more. 2 of my close friends have had girls in the last month and although I am happy and relieved for them, it is still very hard to handle. Thinking of you and DH Xxx

snowdrop three months... I'm so, so sorry Isla isn't with you today, and tomorrow on your birthday, and every single day. I'm glad you're glad to be away from it all. Thinking of you xx

mias that's very hard, particularly if you all thought the baby was going to be a little boy. (I live in slight fear of my super-fertile SIL popping out another little girl.) I would imagine that you might always feel at least a little wistful around this newest member of your family... I'm glad, 'glad', you and MrMia could cry together. Consider yourself hugged xxxx

littlestar you're welcome my love

wtw have a great time being a big kid tomorrow! Lots of love to you xxxx

blue ah, little Lotta - teething is tough work for a little one, isn't it, but even harder for the mummies I think! I hope she does decide to take a bottle very soon.

blizy you were on my mind a lot this morning, just wondering how you are... And whether the referrals for the HSG etc have come through yet? I hope you're ok, and just wanted to send you a very big hug, and say that I am so looking forward to the day when you come on here with your BFP - I hope it's so so soon - it will be such a celebration...

Thanks all so so much for the well wishes re the IVF. It's early days so nothing much going on yet, although the down-regs are making me feel a bit spaced out and very tired. Still in the 'shutting down' part of the cycle, so it's not stressful yet - at least, not very!

Cheese, squeeeeeee! Twins squeeee! I know it's v early days but wow, so exciting! Look at you and Razz both pg again, it's so lovely.

Mias, I've been thinking of you a lot as M approaches 13 months - trying to imagine how it must have been to lose Mia then. {{{{hugs}}}}

To everyone who thought of Thea on Wednesday - thank you so much. I can't really believe that it's been 2 years - sometimes it feels like an eternity, and sometimes hardly any time at all. I suppose the ache has lessened, but I still think of my darling firstborn every day and always will. Little M is the sunniest, sweetest baby, though, and she does help so much. I hope everyone on this thread gets their rainbow very soon!

Littlestar, so sorry to hear about your darling Finn. The ladies on this thread will hold your hand through thick and thin, so please stay around for support and an understanding ear whenever you need to rant or cry or hope.

Green, I'm so sorry your appt was so stressful. There's no fear like it. I'm so glad the mw finally found the hb and all was well. And I hope your mum is okay.

All this talk of second (and third!) rainbow babies is making me extra broody! DH and I were originally going to ttc in October after my 30th birthday party, but I can't wait that long any more. We've decided to do a bit of a health and fitness kick, and try to sort out our finances too, and then ttc in the summer, once June is safely past. I don't want another March baby, with Thea and Maia's birthdays so close together. An April baby would be fine, though...tries to quash thoughts of ttc a Christmas baby

Why didn't that strike-through work?

Fan and Blizy, I think of you both so much and cannot wait for the days when each of you finally gets to cuddle your rainbow baby.

Need some hand holding, I'm spotting again! I've been having strong pg symptoms all day, nuasea and tender boobs, but now this! Could really do with out this!

Oh Fan try to stay positive if you can, (practically impossible I know) can you see your GP tomorrow, or go to the EPU for a scan? Holding your hand and squeezing it tight and desperately hoping that this baby sticks for you. Lots and lots of love xxxxxx

Oh no, Fan. Here holding your hand! Stick, little baby, stick!

Evening all

Sorry I haven't been about much I've had loads on my plate this week.

Fan: We are all praying so hard for you. Try and rest up as much as possible......maybe a trip to the EPU might help put your mind at rest. FX everything is ok and the spotting goes by tomorrow xxxxxx

Kliene: Just to say I have been thinking of you on your IVF journey xxxxx

LittleStar: So sorry you find yourself here. I really wish your baby boy Finn was with you and you never had to find this thread. The ladies on here are so supportive and we are here to help as best we can. My 3rd child Adam was stillborn at 38+4 on 4/7/2012 five days before my planned c-section. I went to the hospital following reduced movement and a change of pattern but he was already gone when we got to the hospital. Its a long road but we are all trying to muddle through together, its so sad there are so many of us xxxx

Whatever: Hope you had a nice afternoon with the girls. Happy birthday to your gorgeous K.....I hope you have a fantastic time at Sleeping Beauty tomorrow, what a lovely treat! It is really tough juggling everything......those kids of mine have a better social life than I do! xxxxx

Green: Hope your mums ok xxx

Cheese: OMG soooooooo exciting xx

Razz: You too, lovely news theres so many growing rainbows xxxx

Mias: Big hugs after your SILS birth, it is so incredibly hard, I shed a little tear for you and Mr Mia. I know your happy for them but it reminds you of how much your missing your beautiful redheaded Mia............its so unfair shes not here too xxxxxx

Snowdrop: I hope you can enjoy your birthday as much as possible tomorrow and you get spoiled by your DH. Good idea to get away from everyone. xxxxx

Im really tired an going to bed soon.

Thinking of everyone I haven't mentioned especially ANGEL, LITTLE, BLIZY, ELLY, POGLOL, TOO and RAINBOX.

Well 'A's headstone memorial was fitted today its been a long hard slog because we imported it all by ourselves!! Its been pouring with rain here in the North so I didnt take any photos but I will take some next week. We are so delighted with it and its everything we wanted and more. God this time last year I was pregnant with him and so excited for the future...................my gorgeous baby boy I miss him so much xxxxxxx

Oh Fan squeezing your hand tight and sending so many sticky vibes. I was about 8 weeks when QA EPU saw me for an early scan - I hope you can get in to have one. If not there is that private scanning place in Cams Hall estate - I also had a scan there, they were brilliant and may even be able to see you today xxxxxx

Morning everyone been awake at some ridiculous hour again. Just cant sleep at the moment.

Fan: Hows things this morning? Hope the spotting has stopped! Massive hugs coming your way from the Babyh household xxxxxxx

Love to everyone xx

fan also hoping so much that it's stopped by now... the stress levels are off the chart, I know. Hugs xx

babyh I am so so pleased that A's headstone is what you both wanted... It's such an important thing. So glad it's finally in place. Will you post some pics, when you've taken some? Would love to see.
So sorry to hear your sleep still hasn't sorted itself out; wish I could do or think of something to help, but it's just all part of this enormous burden of grief, isn't it? Hope that you have a good weekend... not long now till you're off to the States

green thinking of you and your mum - I hope she's being beautifully looked after and that her injury is a lot less serious than you all feared.

snowdrop thinking of you on your birthday

Love to all and wishing you a peaceful weekend x

Very quick check in to send love to FAN, I hope things have settled again for you, it's a horrible horrible worry.

Thanks for well wishes re Mum, she has had X-ray, and 'just' compression injury on her spine, not break, although its very weak so might still... She was due to fly home on Monday, hospital says she can if she feels well enough, but I'm a bit concerned that might take quite some time. (I'm being very selfish). Not sure there's much I can do about it though, so just have to wait... Bit stressed!

Will catch up properly tonight. Love to all. X

Checking in to send love to Fan and I hope the spotting stopped. Wtw's suggestion of scans sounds good - are you getting any early scans? With M I got one at 7+5 and one at about 10 weeks, then the 12 week scan.

Green, glad your mum hasn't broken anything, but what does a 'compression' injury mean? Where does she live that she has to fly to?

Babyh, so pleased you got the headstone as you wanted it. It's a strange concept, isn't it, that you can be pleased by a headstone. You know what I mean, though! Hugs to you and yours

How you doing this morning lovely fan? Just had a look its £60 for a dating/viability scan at FirstView in Cams and they are open today xxxx

Green glad your mum is 'okay' but I know you don't have an easy relationship and its a stress you could do without

babyh glad A's stone is as you wanted it to be. We were relieved when Erin's was finally in so I do understand xx

Love to everyone xx

Thank you everyone, it really means a lot. Its only the slightest pink spotting now, I have no pain. DH has gone to work and I'm under stricked instructions to stay on the sofa watching movies all day.
I think we shall wait it out till monday, if I'm still spotting I shall go to GP's and get referred to EPU, but as I have no pain then I think I shall wait it out.
Thanks wtw for the cams info I shall keep it in mind.