Fantastic Forty Plus, part 9, this time is our time,bring on the bfp's!

[hopefulgum]

We've filled out thread - I do hope you all find your way here. I can't add a message on the old thread to let you know it is here...

This new thread, will no doubt have its own set of bfp's and babies. I am excited to see what it brings.

Hi, can I join you? I had my 3rd mc/mmc in in November but time waits for no womb, and I'm 40, so we're forging ahead. Luckily my body has sprung back in to action really quickly this time so today is cd 7 (gulp).

Ps, does anyone else feel like they are on a horrific treadmill?

Cd count, dpo count, cd count, dpo count, bfp (Woo!), mc, wait, wait, wait, cd count, dpo count, cd count, dpo count, Bfp (woo), mc, wait, wait, cd....

Thankyou morien and diege x
No more bleeding atall....infact apart from slight bloody discharge whilst wiping(and I mean slight) a week last Friday and even lesson the Sunday....infact I dont think I would have noticed had I not have been looking for it.....i have had nothing. I guess had I not even asked if there was a chance of a scan for reassurance whilst talking to the out of hours triage nurse, I may not have even known at this point. DP has banned me from googling as the outcome seems to be so varied for this scenario. I'm not really a religious or praying type.....but hey, I have prayed over the last week.

Hello to twentythirteen.......oh my, yes that little rap sounds familiar (maybe we could do something for youtube). My other half went up North with the army at the end of October and before that I was an obsessive mess of counting, charting, checking cm etc. When he went away I felt a bit despondent and put all my ttc tools away accept for thermometer (but only around ov time) and opk sticks. I went ahead with my first round of clomid thinking I would just see what my reaction would be (I had been having varying length cycles of between 28-46 days since ttc) and hey presto first month BFP...very lucky timing with DP homefor just 36 hours. I'm just waiting now (dates from lmp make me 7 weeks but prob slightly less due to ov around day 16-18) to see if my little bean is actually growing in there.

Yes, definitely a treadmill although this is only cycle 3 for me.

I have a definite feeling I could get a bfp this month...with my 3 dc I knew virtually straight away that I was pg, as silly as it sounds almost from the moment of conception. I'm now approx 3dpo and this morning had the weirdest sensation in my stomach, a kind of fluttering nervous feeling, almost but not
nausea. And last night when I was getting into bed I noticed that my nipples were extremely sensitive and HUGE! I remember having the same sensations when I was pg with my 3dc.
But then I could just be setting myself up for disappointment again. The problem with ttc at 40+ is that we don't have the luxury of time.
Anyway fingers crossed for all of us.

X

Calibee, I'm keeping everything crossed for you...well not quite everything or there would be no point on being on this thread!

Thinking of you CalliBee

Hello everyone waves and welcome to all the newbies - I have only been away for a few days and it?s all going on!

Morien & Hopeful ? I too am having a weird symptom free month this month! I am CD19 and although I have had a +ve OPK every month for the previous 4 months at or around day 12 or 13 I haven?t had one at all this month. I had my first test results done this cycle that said my FSH and LH were good so not sure why I wouldn?t ovulate. Anyway as I didn?t know if/when I was going to ovulate my DP and I have been going at it for days! (14 times so far ? DP is worn out but soldering on!) As we have been travelling about over Xmas and new year I am not sure my temps are going to be reliable (as well as varying waking times there has been naughty alcohol consumption and late nights) FF thinks that I O?d early on day 10 - which would mean I am currently 9DPO. Funny thing is that my temps did drop on day 4/5 DPO and have now gone back up again and yesterday I had pinky blood on the toilet paper when I wiped but then it disappeared ? thought I might have imagined it? Obviously, I have now convinced myself this is implantation dip/bleeding and am planning to do a test tomorrow ? or should I wait?? I wish there was a hand wringing symbol! I have no other symptoms except my boobs feel bigger (but to be fair I have put on quite a lot of weight over Christmas so just being a bit fat is probably the reason ). I am having my day 21 bloods taken on Monday so I guess that will show if I have ovulated?.Anyone experienced no ovulating on a month before?

My New Year resolution is to look after myself better (less work stress, better food and less of it, I am off the booze and plan to do more exercise) I did a 2 mile run the other morning and it nearly killed me! Last October I could run 10k in under an hour so I need to get off my behind and start training again?..so good luck all you C25K?ers. It is a great programme- stick with it and you will be really surprised how quickly your fitness improves.

Congratulations to Remnant ? wow! What a lovely surprise ? I am sure you DH will come round to the idea especially when he finds out you were already there when he changed his mind.

I am thinking of you Calibee, Jbrd and Sparkly.

xxx

That does sound hopeful Greenlizard. I'm not surprised though with all that action - 14 times - in how many days? If you're not pregnant it's certainly not through lack of trying Not had any knowledge persoanally here of non-ovulation, though apparetly we all have annovulatory cycles at least once a year so I've read. I'd give it another day or two before testing as if the spotting were implantation, it would be at leats 48hrs before any hcg was released into your wee. Very exiciting!
Well, just as we thought ds2 had a brilliant immune system and had somehow avoided the pox from ds1, he has some very suspicious looking spots tonight - about 2.5 weeks after ds1 first developed his spots...Brilliant timing with work next week and job interview too, but will have to muddle through. He seems well in himself and who knows maybe the spots will have gone in the morning
Off for an early night - love to all xxx

It is lovely to hear from you Calibee. I hope your scan brings wonderful news. I think the fact that your HCG is climbing is really good.

Well, Newpatches and Greenlizard, I do hope you both get bfp's. What a great start to our new thread! We've got loads of newbies and already one BFP. Bring on more,I say

Finally at 8 dpo, I am starting to get some breast tenderness. However,although my temperatures are above coverline, they are still not very high. I have mixed feelings : "I'm probably not pregnant", and "maybe I am seeings it all feels different this month". I also had very vivid dreams, and tonnes of them,last night, which is sometimes an indicator for me. But,hey ho, just have to sit it out and wait and see.

Hi twentythirteen - your rap does sound familiar. I found the waiting between the miscarriage and getting AF and ovulating again the most excruciating. After the loss, and the grief, you just want to crack on and try again. The tww is no fun, but it's not that unknown,interminable wait like after a miscarriage.

I am so sorry for your losses.

There does seem to be a lot of loss when ttc after 40, but, there are also so many new babies - as Knickyknocks said. I can't believe you are 30 weeks already. Congratulations on your little boy. How lovely for you. I so look forward to being at that stage one day, confident enough to start thinking of names and buying clothes for the little one.

Deige, sorry you are battling with the kids being sick. It's a merry-go-round! I hope you'll be able to juggle it all, and that your job interview goes well. Is the job close to home?

Isabeller, it is very exciting that your transfer is close. Will you still be able to do the C25K training during the 2ww?

I'm still doing it, though my knees and ankles are really making a fussToday I will strap them before I go to see if it helps. When I start the jogging bit I am quite often struggling to get my legs to behave, and end up doing a shuffle (I must look ridiculous). But I so love the idea that I might actually be able to do it without struggling, running the whole 5 kms at the end of 9 weeks, feeling fit,and maybe even losing some weight, that I am motivated to keep it up. The only thing that might stop me is getting pregnant.

Hi to everyone, so nice to have so much action on our thread!

CaliBee - oh, I so know how you are feeling now, this is complete deja vu! I have everything crossed for you, wishing you a sticky bean! Do you really have no one to go with you to the scan? I really really would not recommend going alone... My DH couldn't come to my first scan, but a friend offered to go with me, and I'm so glad she was there. DH was there for the second scan (when we had the good news), but when I went in this week to discuss the tissue I had passed, he couldn't come with me because we had DS with us, and they didn't allow children on the ward because of the Norovirus. So DH had to wait with him outside. Even though I had been prepared for the worst, it would have been easier to cope with the news if he had been there. The nurse and doctor were lovely (the nurse gave me a hug), but still...

Hello to all the newbies, welcome to the thread! They are lovely here, and full of wisdom in all matters ttc.

remnant and sparkly, how are you feeling? I can highly recommend the 40+ pregnancy thread, if you have not already found your way there. Lovely people there, too.

I'm still a bit wobbly, having good days and bad days. Yesterday was quite good, I was quite active - for me, that often means baking, I find it highly therapeutic and so enjoyable. Now I have a huge white chocolate mud cake sitting in the kitchen that I will struggle to get rid off - any takers? I'm doing Weight Watchers, and DH doesn't like cake very much.... Will try freezing it. Or give to DH to take into work on Monday.
Today, unfortunately, I felt really rough again. I am still/again bleeding, and I think the level of my tiredness is linked to that. I bled much less yesterday than today, when I felt like something the cat has regurgitated. Not sure that the iron tables are helping very much, but it's difficult to say. But I've been bleeding on and off for over 3 weeks now, it's bound to have an effect.

I have decided to most likely take next week off work, or at least parts of it... If I feel like today, there is absolutely no point in going in. DS will be back at the childminder, so I will be able to get plenty more rest. Which is all that I want at the moment.

Remnant... Congratulations to you!!! Excellent timing!

Lotsofcheese...a girl!!! My oldest is my dd and they are good fun...as are the boys!!! Very good of you to not blurb to dh!

Hi to new patches and little as well as quick ( waving and introducing myself)
Isabeller hope everything goes ok!!!

Calibee I don't profess to understand what is happening with you but offer my hand( offering hand in unmumsnet manner)

Jbrd thinking of you

Diege...sorry about your dc!!! Pox???

Gum hi there!!!

And hi to all of you...waiting for my AF as we only dtd on day 9 any my peak on cbfm was on day 18...now dh is better but af due in 3 days..so out of the race this month!!!

Jbrd send the cake my way :) xxx

Wow, remant, congratulations, it'll be lovely to have company I very much hope your DP comes round sooner than mine, because he hasn't yet.

Calibee, I have everything crossed that you get good news on Monday.
How lovely to have knicky & cheese pop in with your pregnancy news. Tina, glad everything seems to be ok, how can your 20 week scan be just a couple of weeks away?

JBrd, I'm not surprised you're tired, time off work sounds very sensible (and the cake sounds delicious!). Thanks for the over-40s pregnancy thread tip, but I'm not sure I'm confident enough to venture on there yet!

Diege, I hope your DS2 does manage to avoid the pox, or has it very mildly, and you can soon get back to being a totally healthy house!

Welcome patches, pixie, soopermum, quick, calendargal, twentythirteen, row, I hope I haven't missed anyone, it's great to have so many newbies on the thread.

Thanks again, ladies, for your support and good wishes. At the moment, I don't feel like I'm going to have a baby, more like I'm expecting a miscarriage - nothing to back that up with apart from the stats at this age, but I think it's at least as likely as a baby. I lost my 1st pregnancy at 11+ weeks, when I thought it was safe, so I know how far there is to go. As remnant says, unless & until I'm safely through the scans/amnio (if necessary), I won't believe it's actually going to happen. I'm also a bit worried because apart from sore boobs and still some cramping, I don't have any other symptoms - no nausea, which I had with DD, though wasn't actually sick, and no more tired than usual, I don't think. Also the week before Christmas, I had a stomach bug, which may have been Norovirus, which I caught from DD - she spent a day vomiting anything she ingested, and then I had the following day - it only lasted about 8 hours, the purging bit, but I don't think that can have been good at such an early stage.
This is the "me, me, me" bit, sorry:
DH is not coming round. I wouldn't have told him with MIL staying (she finally went home on Thursday morning), but as it was Christmas, and I'd normally be drinking, I felt I had too. I told him on Boxing night, and he had the meltdown the following day, when he told me that he'd decided over the previous two weeks, he definitely didn't want to have another baby. We have not discussed it since. Thursday was mostly ok, Friday he was definitely more withdrawn. He's working away overnight tonight, and when I said "I love you" at the end of our phone call he just said ok, when he usually reciprocates, which had me in floods of tears when I came off the phone. When I told him, 11 months ago, after months of dithering because I didn't know how he'd react, that I wanted another child, one of things he said was that he'd like to share the pregnancy which he absolutely didn't last time. I went through it with no support from him - I even had to go to NCT classes on my own, when everyone else had their DP with them. Everyone kept saying that he'd come round and he didn't until DD was born. I don't want to live in fear of losing him for the next few months - again. I think we'll have to talk tomorrow, as I'm on nights next week, which otherwise rules it out til at least Thursday. His week has filled up so the only day he's not working is Wednesday and I don't think it's sensible for me to go the GP between nights, as I'm usually tired and incoherent when I get home. Thank you for your patience if you've got this far, I appreciate a place to rant.

love to everyone, especially if you're on the 2ww, and enjoy your Sunday.

Oh Sparkly . Big ((hugs)). What a horrible time you are having. Your DP really needs to try to be mature about this and be there to support you. I know he feels it is overwhelming, but to shut you out is so hurtful. Will he go to marriage counseling with you? It is just not fair to have zero support and so much worry about losing him while you are pregnant.

I really understand the bit about finding it hard to believe there will be a baby until after the scans etc. Til then, remember, for today you are pregnant,and take good care of yourself.

Jbrd, I hope the iron helps. Do you make stock or bone broth? In Chinese Medicine it is considered a great tonic after blood loss - but needs to be homemade with chicken bones and vegetables. Add a dash of vinegar to help excrete the minerals from the bones. It is supposed to help.

Hello again, still lurking! Glad that Gum has started the new thread. Thank you for putting me on the list. jBrd I hope you are ok, I find baking therapeutic too but usually end up eating the cake! Calibee I hope everything goes well. Sparkly I'm so sorry you are feeling like this and your husband is being distant about the new baby. I have no advice to offer other than to send you my very best and positive vibes and to take each day as it comes.

Nice to see so many newbies!

I had the weirdest cycle last month of 44 days and now at 21 DPO this time I don't think I have ovulated. I am putting this down to stress as I have had to come to NZ for the Christmas holidays and I find my husbands family a bit of a challenge, bit like Sparkly's my MIL kind of takes control of everything but they don't think like I do and it's hard trying to second guess the best thing to do with people so different. I am not really TTC this month because of this but it's at the back of my mind as usual.

Best wishes everyone, sorry for not naming everyone. Happy New Year!

wylie, 21 DPO, have you tested? When you say 21 DPO, do you think you ovulate on a particular day? It's definitely worth testing - who knows, you might have a little holiday passenger on board? However, it wouldn't surprise me if stress puts your ovulation off, especially stayong with in-laws, that can't be easy!

Just when I said I was practically symptomless, at 8 DPO, I am now riddled with symptoms. Suddenly my 's are feeling full and tender, I am feeling a bit nauseous here and there (but so do my DS and DH, though they are sicker than I feel), plus a metallic taste in my mouth and can seem to smell everything strongly. So now I am feeling extremely mildly optimistic [crazyladyemoticon]

hopeful fingers crossed that it is your month
calibee glad to hear it could still be good news for you
sparkly very sorry about your dh, surely he understood that this could happen if you were having sex? surely he should take some responsibility? would he go to talk it over with someone? with or without you? I still haven't worked up courage to say anything to dh here. He's being very sweet atm and I'm terrified he'll be really negative. In fact I know he will be. I'm just not sure if he'll come round afterwards. I am coming round to the idea i should tell him sooner rather than later. I think it will only make it worse if I don't. I was thinking of giving it a week or so to see if it turned into an early mc, but since I wouldn't want to keep that from him I suppose I should say something soon.
jbrd hope you put your cake to good use. Sounds like you're doing really well
diege hope you get a break from the migraines and spots

must dash now, i have a date with ds to make blueberry muffins

Ooooh hopeful or crazylady if you perfer? that sounds quite, well, hopeful! How long is your luteral phase normally?

This morning I experienced quite a sharp drop in temperature followed by a bloomin' smiley face on my OPK...on Day 20!!! DP and I have been giving the worlds rabbits a run for their money over the last week and half and the one day that DP has taken his kids away I get a sodding smiley face 8 sodding days late! aghhhhh! The spotting must have been from dtd too much . I feel like I have AF type cramps in my lower abdoment and twinges on my left and right - which could all be in my head to be fair - I am not sure what is going on. Am I the only person to do a HPT and and OPK on the same day? - ha [evencrazierladyemoticon] The lines on my FF graph have gone off in huff as it clearly can't interpret my chart any more......

I was due to have my 21 day progesterone test tomorrow but I am guessing I should push that back by a week? Anyone got any ideas?

Sparkly your DH reaction to your current and DD pregnancy sounds complicated rather than just an overreaction - has he ever talked about why he feels this way? It is important that you get some support during this difficult time and not just for your pregnancy (which obviously is important too). I really hope your DH can help and support you in time but sounds like he needs to help on his own. If you DH doesn't want to discuss things with someone did you know that you can go to Relate on your own?

I went when my ex and I were having problems. Initially he said he wanted to go and actually made the appointment but then actually refused to go, so I went on my own. I can honestly say that it was a lifesaver for me - it was simply brilliant. They do charge (but only if you can afford it) and for me it was the best money ever spent. Just a thought.

xx

remnant, if you do decide to tell DH sooner rather than later, I very much hope he'll be more positive than you think. We both miserable at the moment, and it's horrible. I did tell DH the chances of a pregnancy were relatively low at my age, but definitely not out of the question, so he knew it could happen. Sending you positive vibes.

ooh hopeful - sounds promising? Thank you for your kind words, and wylie too, I sympathise about your in-laws, it's really tricky when they have completely different ideas/thought processes about what's important and what's not.

greenlizard, I think you're right about DH's reaction being complicated and not just an overreaction. It's almost like he has a phobia of pregnancy, maybe that's a bit strong, but it does seem quite extreme. He had counselling last time. Thanks for the tip about Relate, I will definitely consider it, I think talking is the first step then getting to the doctors this week.

Either I am pg or menopausal...I had to strip off while sitting at the dining table this morning, came over all hot and faint and nauseous...couldn't get my arm out of my dressing gown and was panicking I felt so bad, lol...the kids just looked at me like I was mad!

And DD1 has just cooked quorn bacon and the smell is making me feel really sick, usually I like the smell but this morning it's making me want to hurl.

Again I know I am symptom spotting, but it's impossible not to.

Hope you're all well

x

aaarrgghh...I'm also VERY quick tempered today which is SO unlike me, I am normally very placid and easy going, but not today. It's horrible.

Newpatches, how many days post ovulation are you? If it is more than 10 I insist you pee on a stick! Those symptoms sound so likely

I am back to feeling pessimistic. My temperature, though taken half an hour early, is just not very high. I would expect higher temps if I were pregnant. Time will tell. 9 DPO today, don't want to test for a couple of more days, or not at all if the temps keeps nose-diving.

Remnant and Sparkly, I'm not sure what I'll do if I get a bfp. Last time I didn't tell DH, I think I knew it wasn't going to last, and it was a very early miscarriage. I was upset, but nothing like with the other miscarriages, so was able to carry on as per normal. My DH had no idea. I still feel I'd do the same again, I just don't want the added angst and negativity (because I know he won't be over the moon like I will) in the early days. But everyone has to do what is right for their situation. Who knows what I'll do if/when I get a bfp. I will feel like it's a miracle and that's how I'll put it to my DH. He knows we are having unprotected sex, that there's a possibility, but he believes it is a one in a million possibility - like a miracle- so that's my approach I wonder if he realises that 1% is actually better odds that 1 in a million!

Hopeful, if I ov'd on time I will be 4 or 5 dpo...but my cycles have been pretty irregular lately, so could have been earlier. I have a whole wad of cheapie internet tests so may give in and see. How are you feeling? X

I think I'll have to stop C25K if we get as far as embryo transfer at the end of the month hopeful but probably good to keep going till then. I hope the clinic will give us a lot more information tomorrow. The whole thing seems so unreal I am taking things one week or even one day at a time.

Warm wishes to all and goodbye seasonal hats as I take down the tinsel x