Fantastic Forty Plus, part 9, this time is our time,bring on the bfp's!

[hopefulgum]

We've filled out thread - I do hope you all find your way here. I can't add a message on the old thread to let you know it is here...

This new thread, will no doubt have its own set of bfp's and babies. I am excited to see what it brings.

Congratulations, littlepinkfizz, fantastic news!!!

Morien - I also think that's it is a lovely and really positive story! Shows that it can and does happen, very sweet

CaliBee - I can understand the sadness and grieving Do you feel a bit relieved now that it is over at least and you can try and draw a line? At least the waiting is over, I hope you can now focus on healing

Feel insensitive now. Sorry to calibee and jbrd but not expecting this one to stick x

pink...woweee I'm really pleased for you xx Be positive :)
jbrd yes I do feel relief. I had known deep down that things were not good....and the prolonging of it all was just awful. I am glad it happened naturally though. Just keeping fingers crossed that its complete and dont have to still face erpc afterall.

Its time to move on. I'm sure I will have sad moments. Two friends I used to work with announced the birth of their son yesterday on facebook which was hard...I confess to not congratulating them (evil witch that I am). And I happened to catch Jeremy Kyle earlier with some total scabber popping babies out like nobodies business...made me cross at the injustice of things.

littlepink - you're not insensitive! I'm so happy for you, as we all are, this thread is for sharing both the good and the bad. Stay positive, fingers crossed it will be a sticky bean!

I'm getting my hair done at the moment, had a lovely facial earlier, I feel human again DH and I will go down to London tomorrow night to see the musical 'Matilda', my belated birthday treat. It almost didn't happen because the friend who was going to look after DS has now also come down with the Norovirus, but another friend has come to the rescue.
Plus, we have booked a little holiday at the end of Feb - it's great to be planning and doing nice things

jbrd am of your lovely things.
We were planning a trip to see DP's family in Grenada before I found out I was pregnant..............hmmmmm....I wonder

Cut hanks ladies, your all so thoughtful. I have already had 3 mc so know getting BFP is only another stage on and a small one at that. I had only poas just to use it up as I knew AF would come next week and if I had no tests then I wouldn't be torturing myself to test. Does that make any sense?

I never for 1 second believed it would be positive. It does say it can detect 6 days early and I was fairly sure I ovulated very early this month.

Who knows ,it will probably all go tits up but for now I am just about pregnant. Will not be telling DP for another week,if all goes well as he would think I was a complete nutter!

I will be 43 in August...crikey...

pink I can feel your apprehension in your writing and I'm absolutely sure that if I ever get a BFP again I will be exactly the same and I have only suffered this miscarriage...not 3 like you bless. As somebody said to me....for today you are pregnant....your very special, enjoy it x

Hello lovely ladies, thanks for the good wishes. I'm feeling a bit rough but wanted to say hi and wish me luck for my lining scan tomorrow. DP said he had a lovely birthday and he took his Mum a lump of my diet busting birthday special strawberries-and-cream-white-chocolate-explosion cake today which she devoured apparently

I just had a leftover bit too, it will probably show up on the scan...

hugs to all Is x

Congratulations pink - fantastic news! I know exactly how you feel - I would be the same - but the conception is nevertheless a very important step!!

CaliBee - your experience sounds very like my later mc. In my case I had passed everything and so no need for ERPC - I'm sure it will be the same for you too.

Isabeller - good luck for the scan tomorrow. When will the embryos be implanted if all goes well?

Littlepink, Congratulations!!!!So,so excited for you. Woohoo.

I know it is hard to be excited after experiencing losses, but you know, this has every chance of being the "golden egg"!

I had lunch with a friend yesterday,and she'd invited her friend over - who has a magnificent baby bump. I was very well behaved, and enjoyed lunch, but I was so of her. However she is ten years younger than me, and fell pregnant 2 weeks after they decided to try (grr!). I am happy for her, really, and every other lady out there that has easily fallen pregnant and made it through the first trimester...I used to be one of those ladies, it is only now, with the difficulties I've had, that I realise how awful infertility must be. Perhaps that is why I am on this journey - to become more compassionate?

Calibee, I agree, that it is good that things happened naturally for you. When will you have a scan to see if everything has gone? Have you done a test to see if the hcg is out of your system?

I was amazed when I had my last miscarriage - it was very early , about 5 weeks, and after the bleeding had stopped I started feeling pregnant again, which had me terribly hopeful, and I did get a bfp (after having faint ones the weeks before), but then started bleeding again at about 6 weeks, which finalised the mc. After that the tests were definitely negative.

Isabeller, that cake sounds amazing.Yum! I hope the scan goes well. It is so exciting that the transfer is coming up. How wonderful.

Congratulations littlepink ,what fantastic news!

CaliBee my first and third miscarriages were similar to yours, I thought the GP's description of what the pain might be like as "similar to menstrual cramps" a tad euphemistic ! Everything eased off after the sac was passed though some bleeding persisted for a while and it was a few weeks before scans showed it was complete. I found for me after the physical side was over the emotional aspect really kicked in, I think I was in survival mode getting through the worst of the miscarriage , even feeling a sense of relief when it happened and then it hit me. You still may be on a bit of an emotional rollercoaster for a while so go easy on yourself. Having a trip to plan is a great idea, going to Grenada would be brilliant!
My birthday is on 17th Feb so a week after yours. My baby from my second miscarriage would have been due on the 5th.

JBrd glad you're still able to get away tomorrow, hope you have a lovely time with your DH!

gum are you being stalked by pregnant women? They seem to be everywhere! I agree that it's easy to take fertility for granted when you're younger and it happens so easily,I certainly did, I think unless you've been through pregnancy loss or infertility it's hard to imagine what it really feels like.

isabeller thinking about that cake is making me hungry! Hope your scan goes well tomorrow.

Thinking of you Calibee and hope you have a lovely time today JBrd

Good luck pink I hope you continue to have good news.

Thanks for the encouragement everyone, it really means a lot as I'm not talking to anyone in real life. The lining scan today is just the next hurdle, there are so many unknowns, if my lining is ok will my donor produce enough eggs to share? Will DPs sperm be ok on the day (he's naturally stressed about that whole 'procedure'!). Will the eggs fertilise? Will they grow? etc etc

The next two weeks are going to be quite a challenge and DPs Mum's current carer now wants to finish her booking 4 days early for a social event - we'd usually be more than happy to cover for her. I don't want to say anything about our treatment so I'm just going "yes, no problem, have a lovely time" and praying that Embryo Transfer doesn't clash.

With luck we will get a lot more information today and I have to prepare myself for the possibility of bad news although I actually feel quite calm and positive by some temporary miracle

xx Is

Isabeller Good luck with your scan! Fingers crossed you get good results and it's going to be full steam ahead!

NewPatches sorry about AF, and sorry that your DH gets really affected by it, too! Is he really keen on getting pg? Hope you both manage to pick yourselves up again soon.

gum it's amazing how many bumps one suddenly notices when trying to make a conscious effort not to think about ttc, isn't it!
I made the mistake to click on a YouTube link of a video someone posted on Facebook the other day - showing a newborn being bathed/getting a water massage (not sure how to describe it, it was a promotional video demonstrating this particular bathing technique, all soothing with plinky-plonk music playing), and it just reduced me to a sobbing mess. Damn the hormones!

CaliBee Def book the holiday, if you can! We have just booked to go to (don't laugh) Centre Parks at the end of Feb - just for a nice little break with DS. I've never been, but I really don't care where we go, as long as we get to go somewhere.

So DH and I watched the first episode of series 1 of Game of Thrones last night, stumbled on a repeat of it on TV by pure accident. I have now just ordered the DVD - I blame you ladies!
I thought it looked intriguing (although soooo many characters, how do you keep track of who is who?!? It's worse than a Tolstoi novel!), and DH found the frequent nudity 'quite pleasant', as he put it. We'll give it a try.

So there. All your fault

Morning all....
Irish I think you may be right...I was mistaking the relief for being ready to move forward. I woke this morning like I had a hangover and struggled to even get out of bed. Still having some mild cramping and debris like clots too....is that normal after passing the pregnancy??

jbrd have a lovely time.... I have just looked at flights to Grenada....only £800 + each... may have to do a raincheck on that one.

hopeful I did do a test yesterday but it is still positive...although it took a little longer to show the line. The nurse at Epau said it would take a week to 10 days. The scan is booked for a week tomorrow...so hopefully all will be clear. I would hate to have come this far only to need the surgical management afterall. Also I'm due back at work on the Monday so I really dont want to take any more time off. It can be a bit competitive at our place...you only have to be out for a day and they change things.

isabeller I hope you get good news today...fingers knotted for you.

(delurking)

Hi everybody!!!!

I have been reading everypost,(lots of free time) but having problems with our computer and can not name check everyone from this (not )smartphone.

Calibee and Jbird... I am finding myself thinking of you and saying a little prayer (hope you don't mind) as I found MC an awful business and a soul destroyer (not very good with words ,you see!).

Gum I read your post and I can relate to certain things you said. Also agree about how hard is not ttc and I hope that peace will come to you. As the decision is related to your DP feelings I would think it makes everything harder for you. But please, please stay with us!!! You and irish are always so understanding and really helped me during some of my difficult days.

Isabeller... hugs for you!!!XXX

I am having a really quiet month . Maybe because I decided to take Agnus castus at lower dosage today is CD19 and still not OV (confirmed by CM, or lack of EWCM, fertility monitor and also OV sticks) I am trying not leaving things to chance but maybe agnus castus wasn't a good idea. Normally I Ov on CD16 so :( .
Just as well as DH is very stressed with work and only dtd once. I tried jumping on him during this week as I thought that I might Ov soon but NO!!! He was so tired and I ended up saying to him to go to sleep.
Might try again tonight!
Also keep telling myself (deluded I know) that if in November we dtd five days before OV day according to my diary (wasn't keeping tabs with fertility monitor then) and I got a BFP (albeit a CP) the same could happen now, but really need to ov soon???
Is it possible to miss the ov on the CBFM???

I also wanted to say that every every time a see a BFP (congratulation littlepink I am happy for you !!!). I don't get here at all. I do get like that in RL but not here. It does pleases me and I am glad for each of you. THis is the place where I feel safe to come and share and I know it is the same for all of you.
But when (and hopefully not ever again) things go badly, when one of you goes through difficulties, than I hold you in my thoughts, as I know as other here (unfortunately) also do that dark days do come.
As a happy Brazilian gal I want to say that happy, sunny days will visit us all, or at least peaceful ones
xxx

(relurks)

Congratulations littlepinkfizz, that's wonderful news. And every successful pregnancy has to start with a bfp. FWIW I'm with notsoold - I wouldn't feel jealous hearing about a bfp here, or think whoever it is insensitive. This thread is something of a haven from RL, isn't it?

CaliBee, IME that's normal. I bled on and off for 3 weeks, sometimes just blood and other times clots and, er, stuff. I identified a pattern whereby I'd have sudden bad cramps (and feel miserable because I'd been thinking it was all over) and a short time later I'd pass some fairly big clots. And then one day it just stopped. I too had the emotional/hormonal dip quite a while after the worst of the physical MC. My gyne had warned me (just as she warned me about the excruciating physical pain) so I knew it was 'normal' but it was really tough.

notsoold it's only you that says you're not good with words. I always see exactly what you mean (I think!) and you always show a lot of compassion.

morien I am experiencing exactly that...thankyou, I feel reassured.

notsold I only ever had one "standard" 28 day cycle whilst using my CBFM and I peaked on days 13 and 14....the next two cycles were 40+ days and it just couldnt cope with that (it just read highs until I had used a box worth of sticks)...nor could my purse, those sticks are quite expensive when you are using 20 a month!!!
On that note...has anybody heard of cycles becoming more regular after miscarriage?? My sudden long cycles were never investigated or given any possible explanations for. Of course my mind is now wondering if some hormonal imbalance led to my inability to sustain the pregnancy??

CaliBee yes! Mine have been mire regular (and shorter) since MC. Haven't asked anyone about it though.

Or even MORE regular

Calibee...mine did not change after both MC and CP...
I know about the prices!!! Oh dear...going with books to pay for sticks :)

Thanks Morien... as the women here are highly articulate I feel out of place sometimes!!!

I meant to say jbrd ..yes there are a lot of names to contend with in Game of Thrones...and some of them sound so similar. This is the third time I have watched series one and I notice something new every time I watch it lol

My scan was good! Womb lining 8.7mm already (8 -14 is ideal) and will continue to grow over next few days. I couldn't believe it.

My kind egg sharer has her scan tomorrow and we were told her egg collection could be as early as Monday . After years of waiting and hoping and some difficult detours on the way I can hardly believe we are here and if we cross all the bridges embryo transfer could happen within the week.

Thank you for all the crossed fingers and good wishes xx

Pleased to hear your good news, Isabeller. Will be thinking of you over the next few days.

Fantastic isabeller ! How exciting for you! You'll be hoping this w/end flies in!

Thanks for the congratulations everyone. Trying not to think about it as I found out so early and know it could just be a chemical pregnancy and AF will turn up as normal on Monday/ Tuesday. However if it happens, me being worried isn't going to change that either way so I a. Just goi g to enjoy every day