The Clomid Crew - Part 2

[goldengirl71]

"Come on, ovaries! Let's get this party started, yeah?!"

[mumalah]

Hi I stumbled over this the other day www.medhelp.org/posts/Pregnancy-35/Conception-at-42/show/754394 There are both positive and negative outcomes.
I thought about joining that thread, but I find this one does the job !

[goldengirl71]

Npg1, I am also bamboozled at the notion of a scan on CD6. What the...? Do come and tell us what they were looking for - and good luck.

Meluv, I think I would test again, too. I think CD38 is far too late for implantation. What puzzles me is that you had a long luteal phase of approximately 16 days (if you ovulated on CD21) so I would have expected more blood as the uterus lining fell away. Could it be pregnancy spotting? Let's not speculate any longer....do another test, love.

Have a lovely day, everyone, I am feeling so, so sad and guilty for upsetting people. What is wrong with me? Why can't I just maintain the status quo and shut my mouth and say only the things that others want to hear? I was supposed to be supportive and instead I have pissed on people's bonfires. I am a twat

[goldengirl71]

Fuck. I am being pilloried on the other thread

[mumalah]

golden Maybe go back and say your taking a break from that thread for a while. With all your knowledge and support, and posts that lift anyone's spirits when they are feeling down, how could they do without you ?

[goldengirl71]

Mumalah, thanks. I have posted to say I have left and that a thread which precludes any frank talking is not for me. I just wish I had kept schtum. They are right - that thread is for support, not quoting statistics! This is what I wrote:

'XXX, you mustn't leave the thread for this is the place to dream. A GP surgery, however, is the place for some straight talking, and I feel your doctor - who is not a fertility expert - is being very unfair in raising your hopes for another baby. I think she is irresponsible to bolster your dreams when you have suffered three miscarriages in the past two years. I wonder when she will offer to help you address giving up ttc. Next year? When you are 48? 49? 50?

I know I must come across as a damp squib with my quoting of statistics and words of caution, however, I feel strongly that it is grossly unfair to newbies to paint a rosy picture of ttc in our forties. Most people who come to this thread leave disappointed. Everyone is miscarrying. Nobody is enjoying the experience. It is fraught with anguish, despite the giggles we still have on here. I refuse to draw a veil over what is actually turning out to be a years-long journey of disappointment for some women who should be enjoying their mid-forties with their already-established families. I particularly feel cross at any GP who would not help a woman recognise what her body is trying to tell her at 46 after suffering three miscarriages in the past two years.'

This is what someone else wrote:

'golden I think the point is that you have confessed to a lot of things yourself that indicate confusion, obsession, questionable judgement. We could really go to town on all your inconstistencies cause they are glaring (not that you're not v likeable!). But we are nothing but supportive of you as we are of everyone here - mothers come in all shapes, sizes, ages and stages of development. We have cheered you on through very deep lows as we believe in you.

It's a failure on your part to project yourself into other people's shoes to start listing stats for women who are older than you.

I must admit I was tossing and turning a little last night at your frank outburst and wondering how older ladies would feel upon reading it. It's just not what this thread is about.

xxx'

I am fucking rotten

[npg1]

Aww golden

I feel dreadful today, after trapesing to the hospital, getting there late because traffic was so bad, having the scan to say everything looks 'normal' for cd6 and then getting my children to school 20 mintues late and then was 25 minutes late for work. I just feel so fed up with all this and its only cd6! I cant believe how much effort is involved in TTC and im so cross and angry with my body at the moment for not being normal.

The parent of child I look after dropped off and I said im really sorry, she knows I have pcos and I told her I had to have a scan, I nearly told her about the clomid and everything but I didnt. I have to have another scan next monday cd11 and wondering if I should say anoything to my other job about the fact im going to be late, she knows we are trying and that I had a miscarriage.

Im just on a downer and wanted to rant! Sorry!

[mumalah]

npg I'm glad your scan was normal, and hope your day gets better[smile
golden I can see both sides , and what you have said is probably what any health professional would say to the lady. However , when hearing this ,she prob felt deep down it was the truth, and instinct was to protect her own feelings ? But there is lots of success stories where ladies mid 40's and older are having babies, so maybe knowing that, gives that lady comfort and hope that she may be one of them. Dont let this get you down, ttc is stressful enough.

[summerintherosegarden]

Yikes, it is a tricky one golden. What you posted was the truth. The fact is that older pregnancies have consistently worse outcomes for both mother and baby. If she has successfully carried 5 pregnancies and now keeps miscarrying, the embryos are simply no longer strong enough. There might be one in the future that is - but does she really want to keep putting herself through the heartache?
Well, I guess she does - and that is her choice - I don't think it was unreasonable of you to question it though (thank goodness we can be frank on here).
At the same time, she doesn't know how lucky she is - what I'd give to be able to have 5 kids!

npg I'm really sorry you're having such a shitty day. It is very involved and life becomes a constant waiting game of...how long til my next scan, how long til my next blood test, how long til AF shows up... etc etc.
I feel so much better in fact for having a little break from it at the mo - last weekend I was hoovering while DH reclined in bed and we both pointed out simultaneously that if it had been the previous week while I was still on clomid I would have been screaming at him!
You must remember the dual curse of (a) highly emotional time TTC and (b) heightened emotions due to all the chemicals coursing round your blood!

I was chatting to a girl today who might very well be fertile (she doesn't know, no reason to suspect not) but has decided to adopt because she things it's wrong to bring another child into the world when there are so many in need of loving homes. I actually really wish I felt that way.

[Meluv]

Npg I have a scan next tues cd7 for me it is to check on my cyst they found I can't take clomid this month hence that reason have they mentioned anythink to you about what they r looking for so early in your cycle ? ... Golden I think you are better off just on hear hunny were we can all be open an honest with each other some points an facts may hurt what is said but we all no there is no malaise in it big hugs cheer up you may have been pushed off that thread but we will never push u off hear u r so valued hear big hugs xxx

[goldengirl71]

Girls you are fantastic in your support of me when I have been an insensitive and imperious turd. Thank you. I have made my apologies and some nice things have been said in response so I shall leave those lovely ladies alone.

Npg1, I am sorry you have had such a fractious morning. I hear you regarding the 'effort' of TTC. Yesterday's scan, for me, involved four buses and 3½ hours travelling. You would think I lived in the South China Seas. However, it is all adding to our arsenal of knowledge and we must try to see it as empowering to know what is going on inside. I do understand the frustration, though

Tell your other job what is going on for you, you need some TLC I am prepared to get it absolutely anywhere. I am a TLC whore

Summer, a lady of 45 I know who has just had her second baby via IVF (donated eggs from Barcelona) advised me not to even consider donor eggs if I am skint (she paid £10k for each round). She asked me if I would ever consider a donor embryo. She said she would have but her DH insisted on his sperm. I told her that, for me, a life is a life and I have no qualms about a baby not having its origins in mine or DP's genes. Like your friend, I feel strongly that adoption is an amazing kindness and, if it weren't for mine and DP's atrocious criminal records, I would be doing it in a heartbeat.

Well...wish me luck, ladies, on two counts: I am about to embark upon a steak, mushroom and bacon pie (with a layer of mash inside!) from scratch with which to seduce my beloved tonight (he is only permitted to eat his tea after he has deposited his sperm). Summer, I was going to reconsider the bedroom sex until I remembered our oversized pouffé in the lounge - fabulous for bending over and it's right next to the fire so my arse won't get cold. Yay!!

[Meluv]

Golden I luv luv luv your post they make me howl I have now a mental picture of you bent over ya puffy with ya ass in the air the fire on getting mounted by your DP pmsl enjoy hunny the food too xx

[Rosiechoice]

npg i hope you're feeling a little better after a rubbish day.

golden i hope you're ok, as for the other thread mishap - forget it and stay with us, we appreciate you and want you here. I think I would have gone mad without this thread already and I'm not even past my 1st cycle! I hope your pie went well, it sounds delish! I also lol at the description of your ass up in the air, without getting cold - definitely something to consider!

Meluv definitely test! Have you got any cheap ovulation, LH surge tests? My friend did 1 when she thought she was having her period, got a positive LH surge, looked it on the net and found out that it can mean your pregnant too, it might be a way of getting an idea if you might be without having the worry of a bfn even though I don't think you need to worry about that

I didn't manage to get another blood test i got back from the photo shoot with work a little early, after having to turn round because of flooding I managed to get to my gp by 4.55 and asked the receptionist (brave I know) if there was anyway of getting a blood test done today, but she told me 'not today because there's no medically trained staff in today' !?! In a gp surgery!!! Apparently they were 'training' off site. So I will never know if I did actually ovulate or not - fingers crossed for next month!

[goldengirl71]

Rosie, I deffo reckon you ovulated this month and you are much more prepared now...roll on your next cycle!

I am ecstatic to announce my pie was fucking delicious a resounding success and both the pouffé and the dining table were used in tonight's episode of Have I Got Lube For You. Seriously, ladies, I used a ludicrously inappropriate amount of Pre-seed - so much so that DP was barely touching the sides. My poor drowned fanjo was slacker than a wizard's sleeve But...the deed is done and I am so proud of my darling boy. Have a great evening, everyone!

P.s...I love this thread, too..you are all so lovely

[summerintherosegarden]

Have I Got Lube For You - definitely has to be one of your chapter titles.

So glad the pie and the pouffe went down a storm!

[goldengirl71]

Crikey. They're still ranting on the other thread as if I had some vendetta against women of a certain age trying for a baby. There are all sorts of women coming out of the woodwork to quote saccharine poems about 'holding others' dreams gently in your hand'. Where have they been for, like, forever? Folk who parachute into a thread and then fuck off should be shot

[goldengirl71]

I wish I could properly interpret the position of my cervix. It would seem mine is still very high up and I have watery cm. Could it be that I haven't yet ovulated? My LH surge appeared 9pm Monday night and I was injected Monday morning. Do I have to bug DP for sperm tonight ASWELL??

[goldengirl71]

I am aware I am talking to myself....where are you all, lovelies?

[summerintherosegarden]

Oh golden...please don't take this the wrong way, but I think you're stressing yourself out with all this worry about your CM and the position of your cervix!

Stick to what you know. You know you had the injection on Monday morning. You know that the injection works within 24-36 hours.
That means that the latest you should have ovulated would have been Tuesday evening. Since we're now on Thursday, I think if neither you nor your DP feel like it tonight, then give it a miss.

On the other hand if you want to at least try to get in the mood, go for it. But don't, don't, don't put pressure on either of you. (What about having non intercourse sex? Just to show/reassure your DP that you want his body for things other than making babies?)

[mumalah]

Golden Sounds like you have done everything you can, Summer is right, a bit of no pressure baby making loving could do you both the world of good , or have a good rest ! I too have been inspecting my cervix position and mine seemed high after when ovulation should of taken place. I still have had no side effects this month, I wonder if its working ? I have a scan and bloods tomorrow , its been a long week waiting. I've had a bit of cramping but not on the side where the bigger follicle was ?
What happens if clomid isn't successful, is there another drug that can be taken ?

[goldengirl71]

Sorry, girls, I gave the wrong information. injection was Tuesday morning, LH surge Tuesday night. Sex Tuesday and Wednesday night. HCG injection works betwenn 30-48 hours (I asked the consultant!) Sorry to do all your heads in but there's alot of hours inbetween 30 and 48! I never feel like I am doing enough

Mumalah, I was expecting cramping last night (36 hours after my injection) but am only just feeling something now - like you, it is not on the 'correct' side! i do not believe that ovulation produces cramping/twinges for every woman. Before I started ttc I don't think I knew of a single woman who had ovulation 'pains'. I am beginning to wonder whether they are an urban legend, like the G-spot Mumalah, are you under a fertility consultant of simply your GP? Have you heard of Gonal f injections? Summer may be having them in a few months' time, maybe she will advise you better. How many cycles of Clomid have you had? Sorry to be rubbish remembering your ttc history but there are so many on here to remember!

[mumalah]

Hi golden I'm under a consultant at local hospital after being referred by gp. Is the gonal f the same as hcg ? Im going to ask all about these injections tomorrow. im going to write everything down and stand my ground at this appointment. I am always made to feel these appointments are rushed and that i have to get dressed and undressed in double time so s not to waste anymore time ! So..this time im going to take my time as others clearly do- i was waiting over an hour after my appointment last time, and ask what the plan is next- if they have one!

[mumalah]

Sorry second cycle first 50mg , this month 100mg .

[summerintherosegarden]

That's interesting golden, the booklet that came with my HCG said 24-36 hours...but, yes, either way, it is quite a wide gap to cover.

Ok, well, Tuesday morning...even if it had been as late as 48 hours then you would have ov'ed this morning so sex tonight would be too late. I think you've got your bases very well covered. But, again, have sex tonight if and only if you and your DP want to

mumalah the gonal f are a bit different to the HCG. The HCG is supposed to stimulate follicles to release eggs - typically used if you have mature follies at your day 12 or thereabouts scan but aren't then ovulating.

The gonal f are some of the same drugs that are used for IVF, so they do broadly the same thing as clomid but are much stronger (bearing in mind that with clomid you ideally want one or two follicles to be produced whereas with IVF you want quite a few more)
From the reading I've done they seem to typically be used with IUI and in fact in the info leaflet the hospital gave me it mentioned both IUI and "we will advise you on the timing of intercourse" - the nurse also said that (while having the jabs) "you might have to come into the hospital on very short notice" which I assume would also be to get inseminated.
I'll hopefully find out more tomorrow and report back.

[Minnieheehee]

I have just started clomid - and have posted on another thread too, can someone enlighten me when scans are meant to happen to check if there are follicles?

also is it normal (today is day 3 of taking clomid) to have stinking headaches? and if so do they continue as the thought of sex whilst feeling like this is horrific!

[mumalah]

AAh Thanks Summer, thats great info, I think I need to ask for the HCG as im not ovulating but producing follicles. im going tomorrow for a scan and bloods so I will ask.
Hi *Minnieheehee, I am on my 2nd round of clomid, and my scans have been day 10 to see if any follicles are present and day 21 to see if any eggs have been released. My 1st round I experienced alot of cramping hot flushes, especially during the night, dizzyness and a few spots, this month - nothing ! I have read headaches can be among the side-effects. I hope this helps !