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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Fantastic 40+ Thread - Part Eight.

999 replies

goldengirl71 · 11/10/2012 21:51

"Come on ovaries! Let's get this party started, yeah?"

OP posts:
JBrd · 28/11/2012 10:16

Tina - hope you're managing to get things back to normal with your DD, it's sometimes quite easy to forget how the whole ttc/pregnancy can affect the people around us. I'm sure your dd will love the twinnies once they arrive and enjoy being a big sister! How old is she, if you don't mind me asking? My DS is only 18 months, so I'm hoping that DC2 won't be too much of an issue with him.

Isabeller - so sorry to hear about your donor withdrawing, so disappointing. Do you think that they might find someone else quickly...?

CaliBee - fingers crossed your ovaries hold out until your DP gets home, good luck!

greenlizard - that sounds really encouraging, good to hear that your GP is supportive. I can only echo what hopefulgum said - yes, charting can make ttc more stressful because it makes you so much more aware of how small the window is and how important the timings for dtd are, but on the other hand it does really help you understand your cycle (at least it did for me). I felt that I was being proactive and doing all that I could to ttc.

hopeful - hope you can 'convince' your DH to dtd. It's difficult, having parents that are increasingly in need of looking after, I feel for you - you have to question everything and anything that you are planning for your own life, don't you? My mum is now on her own after my dad passed away 2 years ago, and since his death, she seems to be aging a lot faster... At the moment, she is fine and capable of everything, but me and my siblings worry a lot about what to do when that isn't the case anymore. None of us live close by, which makes things even more complicated.

I'm good, thanks for asking! Feeling cold to my bones all the time, can't seem to get warm... I remember this from last time - first trimester I was an ice-block, then boiling for the 2nd and 3rd!

I spent a lot of time at my GP yesterday, with very little result Hmm My medical history requires quite a lot of 'action' for this pregnancy - I had a pulmonary embolism in January, which means that I will be at increased risk for another blood clot now because of the pregnancy. So I will have to have heparin injections until I give birth. Naively, I thought the GP could just write me a prescription and it will be then all reviewed by the consultant again, but no... Left the GP empty-handed with the assurance he would call the consultant's secretary to make sure I get seen asap (the usual 2-3 week waiting time might just about push me into the Christmas shutdown otherwise!). Great. So now I'm none the wiser. Thing is, we have just booked our flights to Germany for Christmas, and I would feel a lot happier if I had the Clexane on board before then. Ah well...

On a more positive note, I did notify the midwives that I need a booking in appointment Smile. So now all I can do is wait (and not spend too much time on the internet reading up on about all the things that can go wrong! Soemtimes, Google is not your friend)

hopefulgum · 28/11/2012 10:59

So true, jbrd, that google is not always our friend! There's such a lot of conflicting information out there.

I don't think it will take much to convince DH to DTD, but on the other hand I'm not really bothered,as I realised whilst driving home, I am only day 9, so it's still early to ovulate. I did an opk when I got in and it's negative, so I reckon I have some time up my sleeve,and I'm sure he'll be all for it over the weekendGrin

I hope your doctor can organise the clexane ASAP. Are you taking aspirin in the meantime?

Tina, I can't wait for you to see your babies again.It will happen soon.I am sure everything is fine in there.

My DH is cooking dinner tonight, and I do hope he hurries up, I am starving! He loves to take his time and be very gourmet-y, but with hungry kids I'd rather some simple home cooking before 7pm!

It's a really busy time at work at the moment, but we are counting down to our long summer break(only 14 work days left). I have marking to finish,reports to write and at the same time I am doing online professional learning. Bad timing for it, but once it is done I will get a pay rise! Every little bit helps. It also means if I go on maternity leave (fingers crossed) I will get my maternity pay at a higher rate.

Right, better go and take all my supplements before I forget.There's about 12 different thingsHmm

TinaO99 · 28/11/2012 14:27

Jbrd she's 21 lol - she seems ok now, she's just been keeping things in I think, and I've been guilty of fobbing her off a bit, got to stop doing that - I've asked her to come with me to one of my scans and she's interested in doing that, hopefully it'll keep her involved. I guess i thought that as she was grown up she wouldn't need much reassurance but I was wrong, she does.

I emailed a consultant this morning (the one I was speaking to about a private scan) wasn't sure if he'd reply but he did - I told him i was worried about not showing much but that I could just about feel my uterus at the top of my pubic bone - he said that if i could feel that it was reassuring and about right so i feel a bit better now - the other thing i didnt think of was that I have a retroverted uterus which i didn't have with my first so i wonder if thats made a difference to being able to feel it at this stage - anyone got any idea??

remnant · 28/11/2012 22:28

oh dear, I've just been looking at the chart's of people using the CBFM on fertility friend.

It seems like most of people ovulate one or two days after their Peak days. We only managed SWI the two evenings before my two Peak days. They were followed by another High and then a Low day (today) and I'm still getting EWCM. So I'm thinking that I might have just ovulated today and the chances of sperm living in my old CM for three or more days aren't too good although I'd love to believe what your doctor says greenlizard.

Anyway, so much for my optimism this month and it's only day 15!
Hope you all have better luck (and more sex) x

hopefulgum · 28/11/2012 22:58

Remnant, I do think you did the right thing. I am a firm believer in the survival abilities of sperm. I know many,many women who say they had sex 5,3,7 days before ovulation and got pregnant. And they weren't all youngsters either. One of them was a lady in her early forties. I think DTD on the two evenings before peak is perfect timing.

I fell asleep on the couch last night and dragged myself off to bed long before DH.Then he slept in DS's bed because he was getting up super early to go away. So there was no sex for me last nightHmmBut it is okay, I am pretty sure I won't ovulate today or tomorrow, so I'll start the Bd-ing in earnest on Friday night...

Tina - I am no expert, but if your uterus is tilted back (is that what retroverted means?) then I think it would take longer for you to start showing.If you can feel you uterus at your pubic bone, like your consultant said - it is a good sign.

Heloo to everyone else. If you are lurking, drop in and say hello!

Isabeller, how are things with your mum? I do hope she is feeling better and that the doctors can help her.Thanks

CaliBee · 29/11/2012 08:23

Remnant I thought the "peak" on the monitor corresponded to +opks. But to be honest when I used mine I didnt use opks so not too sure.
Well my body still seems to be holding out although I'm sure ovulation is very near. Yesterdays opk was darkening so I tried a smiley stick which was negative.....has to be the first time I hoped it would be negative lol. I have another scan tomorrow morning so all will be revealed then I guess. DP will be travelling home tomorrow and should be with me for the evening.....rubs hands excitedly
Is anybody else finding the Xmas build up a little tedious? When my children were little I loved it with a passion....alas mine are all past the nativity and carol service days now. I'd give anything to go through it all over again.

CaliBee · 29/11/2012 16:06

Soooo I just got a strongly positive on an opk and a smiley clearblue. Dp will be home tomorrow evening.....do you think there is a chance ladies??

remnant · 29/11/2012 18:11

There is a chance I'm sure calibee Grin
Excited for you Wink
Can you get an early night?

btw. I tested with a boots brand opk on at least one of my peak days and didn't get a hint of a second line. I googled it and it seems that it's not unheard of to get a peak and a negative opk.

This will be the first chance ds1 has of noticing what's christmas is, so we're getting properly festive for the first time. I'm even making an advent calendar (ie. stickers on little envelopes on a string), but I keep eating the chocolate coins that I bought to put in them Blush. I'm going to have to fill them with non edible things.

tina I was told ages ago I have a uterus that tips back (I'm not sure if it still is post-labour because i understand they can move around over time). As i understand it, the only noticeable affect it had on my pregnancy meant that I started with the frequent urination very early on. How's that going for you?

CaliBee · 29/11/2012 18:14

remnant....if it wasnt so darn cold I would be on him in the car after picking him up from the station loool.

hippychick66 · 29/11/2012 20:08

Whoop whoop for Calibee's Smile Go get your man!!!! LOL

hopefulgum · 29/11/2012 22:48

Calibee - that's fantastic! Enjoy your weekend with your gorgeous man.

remnant, I know I need to get an advent calender for my DS, but I can't find one that isn't all sweets and chocolate. I suppose I ought to make my own, but just can't seem to stretch myself to that. I will have a look today when I am in town. Actually I remember seeing a very sweet wooden one in a shop, with cute little drawers to put bits in, but it was about $90. So perhaps that's a bit over the topGrin Would make a nice family heirloom.

My Dh wouldn't appreciate the longevity or stylishness of it - he'd prefer to scrap all Christmas traditions. I must admit to being a bit Scrooge myself when it comes to Christmas. I think it is mainly because of the expense and exhaustion.

I would love to spend heaps for all the trimmings a beautiful tree and great gifts, but spending the money makes me feel more stressed. And then there's the fact that we are teaching til a few days before and the end of year is really busy at work.

I also find all the social events a little overwhelming. I do enjoy them, but I am just one of those people who find it exhausting. This weekend we have a staff picnic on Saturday,then a birthday party at the beach on Sunday. During the week I have a Tutor's dinner. The following weekend,another staff BBQ (DH and I work in different departments), and my Knitting club are going out for lunch. The weekend after that,another party with friends, then there's my daughter's graduation from primary school, my end of year party (another staff bash) and then I'll collapse into my chair having done no Christmas shopping and have no idea what we'll eat on Christmas day!ConfusedAt least I will be busy,which might keep my mind off other things (like ttc).

Sorry - reading that would have been exhausting for youSmile

All I want for Christmas is a Big Fat Positive. It was Christmas 2011 that I had my first miscarriage (literally,Christmas day I started bleeding), so I will light a candle for my little Alfie, but I will try not to let it ruin my day. I just hope I have something else (a pregnancy) to distract me.Thanks

hopefulgum · 29/11/2012 22:50

Sorry, It was Christmas 2010. Wow, that sounds like so long ago...

CaliBee · 30/11/2012 08:10

Gum How sad to have that memory of Cristmas day Sad ...big hug. It sounds like you have a massively busy time in the run up. For me I have a smallish night out with the girls I work with and a couple of meals with the wards I cover., but thats it then until the big day.
jbrd how are you feeling??
miasmummy wishing you lots and lots of luck and good thoughts at the moment. Cant wait to read about your safe and easy delivery x
No temp hike this morning so fingers crossed that for once my body is working with me. I literally cannot wait to get my hands on him....its so true that the sexual appetite is heightened during ovulation for me (or is it that its been 2 weeks since we were last together) Grin I have another scan this morning so a lot will be revealed as to weather or not I have ovulated.

Isabeller · 30/11/2012 10:20

It is very encouraging to hear everyones hopes and successes (and sad news which makes me feel not alone when things go wrong).

Good to hear of your DD Tina, I have an adult DD (my only child) and I hope she wouldn't find it too hard to accept if we succeed.

Mum is still having tests and fed up with being in hospital but better for having treatment she can't have at home. I really hope they come to a diagnosis and treatment plan soon.

The clinic have told us they will try to re match us as soon as possible. I'm sure if they do I will immediately panic, meanwhile I am finding it very hard to concentrate on anything...

Sparkly December wishes to everyone

Irishmammybread · 30/11/2012 20:41

We're having a very difficult and sad time at the moment so I'm going to take a break from Mumsnet for the moment.
My lovely father in law died suddenly and unexpectedly the day before yesterday, he'd had some health issues but nothing that we thought was life threatening. The evening before was DD2's 9th birthday and after her party we'd called at their house with the cake to blow out candles and celebrate, so we have some last photos of him smiling and enjoying time with the kids. It's hard to believe that only a short time later my MIL phoned and we rushed over arriving the same time as the ambulance to find him dead.
We had no idea what you do after a bereavement, handling coroner,funeral arrangements and all the logistics and practicalities while dealing with our grief and the kids, not to mention supporting my MIL(DH is an only child so it's just us). It's a steep learning curve.
Neither of us has lost a parent before,it's a different grief to losing our babies. We're sad because we knew Papa and loved him,with the babies we loved them already though we never got to know them.It's been a shitty year.
I'll be back but need a bit of space to deal with all of this.
Much love and good luck to everyone.
x

Isabeller · 30/11/2012 22:40

Thinking of you and your family Irish xx

hopefulgum · 30/11/2012 22:55

Irish, I am so sorry for your loss. I am thinking of you during this difficult time. Take all the time you need, but please come back when you are ready. ((hugs))xxx

remnant · 30/11/2012 22:56

irish very sorry also to read about your loss. I have lost a parent and I think that it's probably impossible to prepare yourself for the impact. Wish you all the best.

notsoold · 30/11/2012 23:35

I am so sorry for your loss irish....I normally just lurk but my heart goes to you...

notsoold · 30/11/2012 23:46

Well here I am after a few weeks away. I lurk around reading posts but trying to get my life together as babies seems adream far away.
Anyways I had dentist visit today and was freaking out that if I needed a x ray what if I had conceived?
Slim chances as we only dtd 2 in the whole month ( both times about 2 days before ov).
But I had a frer and considering that my period is due on the 4 of december I poas and nothing in 3 minutes and a very faint line in 4 minutes BFP!!!!
Or so I hope....I spend the whole day looking at it and wondering if was my imagination. At 6 pm hubby came and I showed him and he said that he could see 2 lines and only then did I show the pregnant sign to him.
As it is so early I dont know how much to trust frer, but a line is a line right???
BFP.....wow

JBrd · 01/12/2012 00:34

irish so sorry to hear about your loss! My thoughts are with you and your family, wishing you strength in this difficult time. Take good care of yourself.

notsoold a line is a line Grin! I have to say I trust the digital tests far more, no gagging about with line or no line, just the written word. Having said that, I had to test twice within a number of days to get my BFP on the digital, plus I'm still poas almost every day at the moment because I can't believe it (those are cheapies, though). So get yourself a Clearblue digital test for peace of mind!
But in any case, congratulations!

woollywomble · 01/12/2012 12:09

Just wanted to pop in and say thoughts are with you and your family Irish, hope to see you back again soon.

Keep us posted Notsoold and congratulations! Flowers.

notsoold · 01/12/2012 15:59

JBrd thank you...:)
I totally agree JBrd...but as it was so early and I had a frer... but I still tested today with a superdrug...BFP possible again!
Faint line but still there...:)

But I went cycling this afternoon so I hope everything is ok....

Thanks woolly!!! :)

hopefulgum · 01/12/2012 22:27

Great news notsoold - a line is a line. Congratulations! I definitely trust FRER, they are my favourite tests. If you are due on 4 Dec, then you are testing quite early, so that is why the line is faint. Very exciting! Can you please remind me of you circumstances (age, other children?, how long ttc?)

We had a lovely day yesterday (mostly)- went to a beautiful spot here with my colleagues from work and their families.It was a very relaxed pleasant lunch.

Afterwards we drove out to DH's parents farm. My SIL has been taking care of DH's parents, but she is from Tasmania and has to leave today.So we wanted to catch up with her before she left. DH's parents really don't look so well,and I think seeing his once vibrant,chatty,happy,bubbly mum, who is now quiet,flat,pale and tired has really shaken him up. On the way home in the car,he was weeping, which is so unlike him.

His father is also unwell, and has to start radiation therapy next week, in another city, for 6 weeks as he has melanoma. It's just all happening for my poor DH. They are also talking of selling the family farm so his parents can be closer to medical help, and that is also upsetting DH. The farm is his home - he moved there when he was 6 months old and loves it so much.At one time, it was all going to be his but the family hit hard times financially and sold a large part of it off. Now they will sell the rest so they can move and I think my DH is realising how serious everything is for his parents.

I know that right now is stressful for my DH,and the idea of a baby might add to that stress, but I do wonder if perhaps bringing a new life into the family wouldn't be a positive and happy thing for everyone? I will still keep ttc as it may not happen, I still need to know I gave it my best shot,and somehow I think it would be lovely to have a new baby to distract everyone from the sadness.

I'm still getting negative opk's but I feel like I am gearing up to O soon, so I will be helping DH relax with a bit of SWIGrin in the next few days.

notsoold · 02/12/2012 00:19

Thanks hopeful ...:)
DH is laughing that I am poas for Britain, but because I would expect my period on the 4th- I have long cycles...32 days- I can not believe it yet.
I am 41 and dh is 53. Gosh that may sound old but we are not ( that is what I tell myself anyway :)) We have a DD 18 already in her own place and DS 13 and up to last Xmas we could not afford another dc and resigned ourselves with that.
But we are financially secure now ( well as much as anyone can be) and as my gp suggested a rest from mirena ( after 2 consecutive mirenas) we decided to try.
I fell pregnant with 6 weeks but had a miscarriage at 12 weeks.( last June)
We were told not to worry but DH and I really thought that maybe that was it.
Tried ov kits and never got a smiley and that got me worried :(
Also dtd is not as frequently as during school holidays and teens are such a good deterrent :)
Last month I thought that maybe mn was stressing me a bit and vowed to take a month out and only check once a week.
Also I started taking agnus castus hoping it would help to conceive but also to help my heavy periods....
And now I am here poas and praying this is a sticky one....

I am sorry for your DH..so stressful the whole situation :( and I fully understand a child to offer comfort to one's heart..my older brother was a ( planned by my mum) plaster for my dad's heart as he lost his own mum and money as well....to this day the plaster( my brother) is a big comfort to my daddy....:)

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