Happy New Year everyone (and I hope it IS a happy one for us all!). brown thanks for that link, I read the article - ok so some terms rather went over my head but I got the gist of it. Very interesting, and for me at my hugely advanced age (I'm feeling a bit like an old nag put out to pasture right now) it actually makes a whole heap of sense, and something I've actually wondered about. It's a fact that at my age I will have more 'bad' eggs than good, and I've often wondered if SO forcing the maturation/release of more than one egg at a time won't simply be upping the number of 'bad' eggs that are being released. I assumed though that your body's natural processes would still junk anything that wasn't properly fertilisable; it's interesting to read that they appear to believe SO bypasses the natural process to some degree and that eggs get through that otherwise wouldn't. I wonder why then Mr S advocates SO for us 'older' ladies? Although to be fair to him, it was me that asked to do it, he said I should do IVF.
I'm still in two minds about SO, sitting around and waiting to see IF one 'good' egg ever gets released when only one a month is coming through (and assuming we manage to 'catch' that one egg) isn't easy, as you will all know. I'm 45 in a week, and like I say, rather feeling that it's now just too late - that, plus as I say, OH doesn't appear in the least bit interested. But I won't be doing SO for a few months, at least, if I ever do do it again, since OH seems to think holidays are more important and I cannot afford to pay for SO all myself and pay for half a holiday (two, actually, since he wants to go away for Easter as well as summer). Where's the Lottery win when you need it?!
Well, I'm just about to start AF, due tomorrow and right on cue bbs have stopped their usual post-OV hurting (although since stopping agnus castus they don't hurt anywhere near as much as they did - and I'm not sure that's a good thing, doesn't less bb pain indicate less progesterone in your system?). So clearly this isn't our month either. I know some people do get successfully pregnant when they're older (abney is an inspiration for me personally, given that she's my age!) but I have to face the harsh reality that so many don't. Although how many 45 year old women try for babies? Who knows. And with DQa and NKc problems, my body's busily trying to kill off anything that might stand a chance of growing anyway, so am I really being sensible even holding out any hope? The last few weeks the joints in my hands have been hurting like heck and the psoriasis on my elbows itching like mad (which they haven't done in years), so I'm assuming for whatever reason my NK cells are on the rampage. Honestly, what realistic chance do I have?
Hmm Sorry ladies, that wasn't intended to come out as a negative post, especially not so early in a new year. But I'm very aware that I may just be banging my head against a brick wall here, while taking extra-strength painkillers for the headache I'm causing. I'm just not sure how to say ok, that's it, and draw a line under the whole affair. I'm not very good at giving up on things!
Hope all of your New Years have started full of hope and optimism, and please ignore my gloomy ramblings!