Trying to conceive after mc? Pregnant after MC and seeking somewhere safe to hide? Recently graduated from the mosh pit? Come on down to the mosh pit for some serious metalling and cake! Part

[Dorita75]

Hi, thought I'd start the new thread. This is a brilliant thread for anyone trying to conceive or who has got a bfp after mc, full of lovely ladies, fab advice and a lovely place to metal, so called because someone said metal instead of mental and the rest is history......

thinking of you today martha . I haven't had personal expericence of this situation but know someone who has, and would like to gently but firmly echo the other ladies' suggestions of taking a camera. Even if you don't want to know, even if you don't want to then, the MWs can take some pics, have a print of you child's footprint and further down the line, when you are able you might be curious... and can open your memory box and see your baby. In time you might want that, and if you don't just never look in the box. I hope it was ok to say that.

pixie I hope you are ok. Is anything bothering you in particular? has the bleeding stopped for a while now? Hope so!

good luck confused I hope it is just one of those things. hope the MW looks after you ok.

jaffa I know what you mean about liking even the tricky side of being pg. I was up three times in the night to go to the loo and up early this morning as I couldn't sleep because of pg insomnia and couldn't be happier about it. I didn't have this with the baby I miscarried but did with DS so it only reassures me. Is weird when peeps on the AN board are whiny about it (or being pg at all!)

Wilde Ive pg insomnia to And constant all day nausea nothing I do makes it go away but oddly it comforts me with dd I had sickness the entire 9 months with my 3 mcs not a lot at all so like u in a weird way

marrf holding you and DH in my thoughts and heart.

(I also was not around for pebs wild tas et al (there's a lot of you!) all getting your magical bfps - many congrats ladies, here's another one wishing it all goes swimmingly for you!)

confused I hope you get checked out today but I would be inclined to think you might have a low laying placenta... In any case, it's good news that there's no more red blood.

Thanks everyone.

I phoned the midwife who said to only come in if the bleeding starts again. manda you may be right. At my 12 wk scan they mentioned the placenta being low and anteria (sp?), so I think that may be it. With my mc I didn't feel pg and knew something was wrong. This seems different, so will be positive.

Just popped on to say martha and dh you are both in my thoughts.

confused i had a similar thing at 11 weeks any chance of a reassurance scan?

confused did you mention to the midwife that your placenta was noted as low? Her knowing that might change the advice she gives you.

I've had previa twice right up until the end of pregnancy when the placenta had finally moved enough for a vaginal birth (DS2 kept us guessing until 36 weeks when it was still just touching the os...). Five hospital stays with DS2 and three with DS3. My hospital likes to keep you for 24 hours with no fresh blood. I was also advised 'pelvic rest' (ie no sex!).

Anyway, perhaps just give them a call back with the extra info if you didn't mention it before? Unfortunately, many of the health professionals won't take the bleeds too seriously until you are 20 weeks (on the edge of viability in their eyes) but it's still worth a call imho.

Thinking of martha and her DH today x

Oh martha I can't even begin to say how sorry I am to hear your news. I'm struggling to find the right words so will just say that you & your dh are very much in my thoughts &prayers. X

Hello, can I join in please. I need somewhere to hide....

Attempting to ttc#3 but am in the marvellous position of being pg more times with no baby after 9 months than pg with baby. Last mc was 1st July at 11 weeks. Was really pretty terrible so need tons of handholding.

Have been lurking for a little while - partly was too worried about joining, partly couldn't get my bloody sign-up to work! I think my cycles are still a bit messy so not sure when I'm due (usually 28 days but last cycle was 24 with days of spotting before which I have never had in my life). Pretty sure I oved a couple of days ago and we did manage a shag that night so we'll see. I'm quite good at getting pg I'm just crap at staying pg.

I know it might not mean much Martha coming from a stranger but I cried for you last night and really hope you're being well looked after

My thoughts and tears are with you Martha and your DH. I was thinking of you today and hoping you were as ok as can be given what you are going through. I am sending love and prayers to you xxx

martha hope it went as well as it could today, I've been thinking of you, sending you lots of love xxx

Welcome snorkmaiden you're amongst friends here I'm sorry about your story, let's hope the happy ending comes soon x

Martha I hope you're ok lovely x

martha I am thinking of you this weekend, I am so sorry.

Welcome snorkmaiden sorry you are here, but glad too iyswim! The ladies here are amazingly supportive and you won't regret signing up!

martha hope yesterday was kind to you. x

welcome snorkmaiden. sorry about your mc. hope you are ok.

Arf I have had some AF type mild cramping last night when I tried to sleep and again a bit this morning and have decided is all over :( Am reet sad today. I just hope if this pg is over i miscarry soon and don't carry on for two months as my body keeps on going with it all for no fecking reason like last time :(

I have terrible ahem, constipation so getting some peppermint tea and hoping that might be causeing my womb-ache! not likely. 4+2 today.

sorry i cannot name check everyone, will catch up soon however:

welcome snorks (can i call you that? i have nicknamed you already ) thank you for your thoughts, you are not a stranger on here

confused keeping everything crossed for you, it all sounds promising though

holding wildes hand so tightly i am sooo hoping it is not over yet, keeping everything crossed for you too.

Thank you all for your thoughts, wishes, story sharing and most of all love. Manda i appreciate you sharing your story, i can completely understand how you felt, we also had a change of heart yesterday but not on that issue.

Yesterday went ok, as well as could be expected. The morning was hard as i was in floods of tears constantly. I then looked on bloody FB as i was bored and one of my friends had posted a random pic of her with DS2 when he was born with her 2yo son sitting on the bed with her - i sobbed and sobbed - DH confiscated my phone at that point

The contractions were painful but i got two shots in total of pethidine, the first shot was amazing, i managed about an hour and a half sleep, the second shot didnt really touch the sides however my waters broke around 6pm and by 6.30pm i had delivered. The delivery was actually so calm and peaceful.

Despite the MW's best efforts we decided not to look at him (yes him - we have named him too but i wont share in case of upsetting anyone). Our lovely MW's dressed him and surrounded him with flowers in the 'cold room' they have also taken pictures and are storing them in my notes to keep forever. So if i change my mind in 2 yrs time i can look

I was exhausted afterwards but was home by 11pm. I spent the night in my own bed and have felt no pain since my waters broke. We are both feeling ok and a little bit positive for the future.

So for our change of heart - well, seeing that pic on FB, distressing though it was, created a bit of an epiphany for me and DH. We want to TTC again not yet, but maybe next year, i will be 40 then so we wont take as long over it but we want to give it one last go. I will transfer my care to St Mary's Manchester as they have all the Fetal Specialists there, hopefully i would get immediate and more constant care.

So we are going to sign the forms for the Post Mortem with the bereavement midwife tomorrow, and have consented to all testing. We want to go through it with the consultant to discuss any chromosomal anomalies so that we can make an informed decision about any further TTC.

So it looks like i will be on this thread for a long while yet! I want to come back and give you all the support that you have given me. I will do a full catch up next week but i want you all to know that DH and i are feeling a lot more positive for the future. We may never have any more DCs but at least the door is not firmly closed. Those thoughts kept us calm for the rest of the day and i am convinced helped us through it.

Much love to you all

your post is so emotional and beautiful. You sound very peaceful and I hope indeed that is how you do feel. But do be careful over the next few weeks and months and take each day is it comes. As we all know too well, grief sneaks up when you least expect it but we are all here for you! Am so happy you will be around for a while yet and that you will ttc again

glad everything went as well as could be expected yesterday martha i am glad you have decided to ttc again. i will be keeping going until menopause until i get my baby - got a while to go though yet!

i hope manchester give you as much care next time as i am getting. i am having fortnightly scans up to 20 weeks (could go weekly but i think thats a bit much for me) with the same nurse at the epu each time. i have got a special midwife coming to visit me later today (we have been tidying the house like crazy - i think we are thinking she is going to be seeing if our house is tidy enough for a baby!!) this midwife will see me all the time through the pg and deliver the baby if i am lucky to get that far. i am hoping she will agree to come to my house every two weeks but opposite weeks to the scans so i am seeing someone every week.

i have been seen by consultant already and have got another couple of consultant appointments lined up over the next few weeks. i have been taking my injections and aspirin since bfp.

i feel very well looked after - i hope you get the same next time.

Lots of love martha, bug hugs x

Oh martha no need to worry about me with everything you are going through. ((hugs)).

pebs that does sound like excellent care, how far along are you now? i was hoping that we would be given extra care if we get PG again but i wasnt expecting anything like that.

wilde we do indeed feel a bit calmer and peaceful now, poor DS is feeling it though, he doesnt know what is going on but knows that something has upset the applecart this week. He is being rather scrunchy at the moment

How are you both today wilde and confused ?

martha glad that it went smoothly. And glad that you'll be around . I know that guilty feeling of how all these horrible situations affect our living DC. I feel like my poor DD hasn't had the best year either . What has helped for me is having my family look after her for a few days at a time and having them babysit so I could go to counselling. Having time and space to properly grieve all you've lost is really important.

hi to snorks (have taken to Martha's nickname for you!)

wilde how are you today? It's not over yet! Cramps and twinges could be anything, I've been a bit constipated and I was convinced I had an ectopic pg!

confused hope all is well with you

and hi to everyone else!

Welcome snorks :)

martha what a beautifully written post, I'm glad you'll be sticking around, best wishes for the future lovely. X

Thanks for the warm welcome and yes, snorks is fine!

Martha, I'm glad yesterday was okay. I echo what the others said that grief is a weird thing. I burst into tears in the lighting dept at B&Q last week with no real warning. I went back to work last week and am really worried about how I'm gonna cope when there's a real life pregnancy announcement. I know this sounds arrogant but I'm struggling with the whole concept that there are other things happening in the world than my last mc and that it might not be the first thing on everyone's mind.

Does anyone know when the pg-like AF symbols bugger off. I always feel a bit sick and a bit bunged up just prior to AF but the last 2 months I've been ridiculous with it. I'm about 4dpo now and already my boobs hurt and I've mysteriously got thrush too. I'm trying to not symptom spot every 5 minutes but my body is making this really difficult. And while I'm still talking about me (sorry) how am I supposed to ever enjoy being pregnant ever again. My first mc was twins but I lost them early at 7 weeks and the mc itself was quite easy physically. This last one tho there was no sign at all that anything was wrong and it was like the baby just suddenly fell out of me. I had a bump and everything :(