TTC 10 plus months, Part 7

[lisacn]

A friendly, supportive thread for those of us who are taking a bloody long little longer time than average to conceive.

Another wtf which I have been sent: Woman is made pregnant by 3D movie. hahahah .
www.thepoke.co.uk/2011/10/13/woman-claims-watching-3d-film-made-her-pregnant/

eek, it was a 3d porno! Note to self: check the detail before trying to be funny

That has to be the best cover-up for infidelity I have ever seen

afternoon ladies

joycep maybe the IVF crack house is just what we need, and well done for telling him to be grateful, selfish git

lotus welcome, go to your GP they have to take you seriously as you've been trying for more than year!! Don't be fobbed off

pout i sometimes wonder if men engage their brains before speaking, I know Mr B doesn't always do it.

gin it ridiculous how the NHS works, I don't get funding as i'm too old now. I bet they still treat smokers and obese people though. Aren't you in the faux Surrey area though??

princess where did he leave the car?? Dr Shehata is £250 for the first appt, £210 for scans and appt and £150 for follow up appts about 15 to 20 minutes

euro good luck for the down regging

Its been a bit of an odd day, at work I was invited to a pregnant colleagues leaving do lunch, I said REALLY I'd love nothing more than to go to someone elses maternity lunch!!! No one else mentioned it to me . Thankfully that is the end of the preggy people at work for a bit, sadly a friend has told me that she has just had her 3rd miscarriage, although I do feel for her as its heartbreaking, part me thinks why the hell can't I get pregnant again!!
Annoyingly Mr B has been too busy to give his SA before his op. Cue lots of filthy looks
My GP called last night to ask about a prescription I had asked for to see if I was updiffed and not told her she made me laugh when she said there is always hope unless you have no uterus or you're dead. I'll have to keep that in mind.

Oh as for Middy, she didn't look preggy in any of the photos to me so if she is its very early days, I read that she couldn't get updiffed before the jubilee as she couldn't take the spotlight away from Old Liz.
Well i'm glad its the weekend, I feel to fed up to deal with work, hope you all have something nice planned

Hay

Gosh - I really can't keep up with the speed of this thread at the moment.

Loads of IVF cycles on the horizon. I was informed of the clinical reason for downreging but can't remember what it was. And I think there is something more to it than timing for the clinic. Having said all that, I was interested in a nautual IVF cycle but my lovely consulatant made it clear that it would reduce my chances significantly. Not saying that is the case for everyone though.

The other thing is, I never felt as well as I did when I was downregging. Just goes to show how much hormones interfere with daily life. The bleeding is a bit odd - more drawn out than a period but less heavy / clotty I thought.

Joycep and Atermis and Euro - I think IVF will feel ok once you are 'in it'. It's perculiar how the goal posts keep changing. I too dragged my heels about doing IVF. Then when I was doing it I becamse obsessed with it going as well as it could and hiding the fact I was doing it from other people. And now it has ended and failed, I would do anything to have had an IVF baby. . Does that make sense? The persepective keeps changing.

Yay to Northern meet up!

Sorry I have missed so many people and so many updates.

DH and I had nice spa thing trip today followed by some dinner (nothern for lunch) which included a new found love - queen of puddings. Totally delish and I now need to find it again.

About K Middy - I think her cheeks are slightly plumper higher up her face in some photos - oooo. Getting prepared to feel jelous and idiotic.

I am another one who doesn't ever imagine getting pregnant. This is despite having been pregnant (and mc) once already and being under a fertility clinic. I just can't believe it will happen anymore. Life is really really hard sometimes. I don't believe other people realise the deapth of pain we feel and how it is a prolongued agony. There isn't a straight forward alternative which becomes apparant over time which is often the case for other traumas - like losing a job or missing out on a dream job or dream house or even breaking up with boyfreind. It's not a grief which settles over time like the loss of a grandparent for example. I'm not belittleing any of those things, just trying to describe the the nature of TTC pain.

Sorry for rambling.

Morning ladies.

I'm back from my travels now and had a great day's shooting yesterday, despite the wind!

I had a really vivid dream last night that I got a surprise BFP. I did a very early test this morning (only 8dpo) before I start the IVF and got a disappointing BFN. The dream had seemed so real. I hope that starting the process on Fathers Day is a good omen.

'Birds and bees' wedding theme. Shivers tacky. Good luck to all with appointments and next steps. So much to catch up on.

I'll join the can't imagine being pregnant band too. SWI week wasn't, seems Mr Teu needs a diary entry , so 2ww knowing that once again it's not. Had a dream last week that I was pg shan't go into who was telling me this news because that bit was rather disturbing I do go in for vivid dreams! Felt it was rather a cruel joke. Had a lovely evening out Saturday for a talk and desserts - totally amazing desserts - horridified when the speaker stood up (I vaguely know her) and realised she was pregnant. That and bumps and announcements abounded. But what does one expect with a room full of women? Felt pretty crap. Stopping now, enough wallowing.

Waves to you all. Welcome to hocus and lotus they are a good bunch here.

Afternoon ladies! Hope you all had good weekends. I've been at my mum's, which was lovely although slightly odd as last time I was there I was pupo...

euro good luck with the DR. Do you do it for a month? Mrgin was shooting yesterday too! You weren't in Surrey were you? If you saw a group of men acting like twats and missing things, that would have been them!

Hi sarlet. Puddings and spa sound lovely. Agree with you about ttc pain. And still totally feel like it'll never happen for me. Am beginning to think it might be best if I continue to feel like this and at some point may have a pleasant surprise. I'm adapting the NHS' stance to planning for failure!

teu boo to the bumps, but the desserts sound lovely.

buzzy I too was at a maternity leave leaving do on Friday. I managed not to burst into tears at the sight if the little booties presented, so was quite pleased with myself! Your gp's statement made me

I'm also being amused my giant squid and 3d movies. The idea of 3d porn (ie giant willies) slightly scares me!

critter yay for the giant follie and hope no one accidentally ate your trigger shot!

I'm still sceptical of ivf as a diagnostic tool. Most of the time they don't know why it fails, so I can't see how it can be a great tool.

Welcome to lotus and hi to everyone I've missed (on the other page!)

I'm in shag week (suspect its actually golden egg day today), so on my way home to try to 'seduce' mrgin demand that he does me! Suspect you could actually make a frittata out of the volumes of EWCM I've had the last week . Fertility drugs must still be lurking...

Small world Gin. I was at Bisley. Shooting on the 600yd range.

Have fun tonight!

Small world indeed euro, that's where mrgin was! They had to go off site to shoot but stayed at Bisley. Do you have a horrible bruise from the gun too? He's now claiming to be too tired hungover to entertain my golden egg, grrr.

Hi all hope you have all had good weekends.
Things have been better here, now I know that I won't continue with the clomid and that's it for us its kinda brought us closer together and we have relaxed. You forget in the middle of it all how much ttc takes cover.
Totally agree with Sarlat the pain is so hard to describe it is a loss but worse when you don't have an answer.
Next appointment for us is me saying I want my endo treating if they don't agree then its back to gp and referral to gyne. I want normal periods where I don't vomit, or feel like I will faint from pain and to be able to use just tampons.
I am not looking forward to ovulation after last months pain and it should be this week, although had no burning pains so far. Still covered in spots which is getting me down, I know I'm vain but I've never had them before in my life.
Feeling oddly positive about the future and the idea of never having to worry about contraception

Gin - glad you had a good time at your mums (sorry about the PUPO reminder). Think it's my golden egg day today too. Seducing DH isn't hard at the moment as he had a 2 month ban during the whole IVF debarcle. Muchos EWCM is gooood!!

Teu - oooo that's a bit unfortunate that the speaker was preggo - no choice to look on in that situation. Hope you poured yourself a nice glass of to compensate.

Euro - I'm excited for you. Do a test on 12 dpo.

Joycep - About the antibiotic thing, google this book "Fertile vs. Infertile by Dr. Toth" Had a research day today and it appears there is definatly a school of thought that some people really do respond to antibiotics for conception. I managed to read a bit of this book via a link and I was interested to read that things like endo can be similar to PID as endo does have its own pathogens which can cause ongoing problems and attack the fertility organs. This can be helped by antibiotics. Could you have a similar pathogen condition, I wonder?? I'm not sure I ever mentioned this but prior to my IVF cycle and just after my HSG, I went to the GP and attempted to 'play up' some mild abdominal discomfort I had at the time and tried to make out I had an infection in the hope he would prescribe me some antibiotics. [embarrassed] Of course he didn't. But I have always had a niggle about this. I'm not denying that IVF may still be necissary for me due to the ? tube blockages but I do wonder if antibiotics could just help an embryo bed in nicely.

Found some new woo to try - it's called the mayan abdominal massage. A girl on another forum recommended it to me. She has similar issues to me and conceived her baby with FET having previously failed at fresh IVF cycle. I have left a message with a very wooey looking woo lady to see if she can offer me this massage.

This forum friend said I have cause to be positive due to the number of embryos despite my condition which gave me a big boost. As my situation is fairly unusual, it was good to get that perspective from someone with a similar complaint.

I do love a new avenue to explore / obsess over.

That's funny gin! I don't have bruises for the first time as Mr euro bought me a recoil pad last week. It's brilliant - no pain at all! I highly recommend them.

Oooo, new woo, sarlat. How exciting.

I've just done my first downregging injection. The jab itself was fine, but I feel a bit down about having to be here.

Quick message whilst I have a window of phone reception to say well done euro on first jab. A galling dream, the real feeling ones are the worst. It must feel very real now but just think - you could be very realistically pregnant in only a matter of weeks. Wow!

Not following on well from that at all really, I've spent a weekend in an open plan barn with a teething baby and tantrum ridden toddler. Not having babies yet has advantages. Eating out in civilised peace being up there together with sleep not broken every twenty minutes.

sarlet spooky about the maya massage!!! My yoga teacher mentioned it to me and I bought a little book on it, it's very helpful for getting the womb well positioned apparently. I'd love to hear who you found as it doesn't seem v common. I can't have it done for a few months but it looks really interesting.

Will be back later. Happy Monday people. Raise those tail feathers!

Hi ladies, hope everyone had a good weekend. I see some of you have taken up shooting... sounds like a very good way to let off steam in the midst of all this.
mrsd - the whole office was silent and didn?t respond to my outburst. The guy didn?t say anything. It was so irritating having to listen to someone say how disappointed they were in what they were getting. Sorry you have a similar situation with your colleague.

critter - great news you have a big follie....the golden egg??

artemis at rushing to watch the latest 3d porno ..haha

buzzy - i?m glad you have got rid of all the pregnant colleagues now. What a helpful comment from your GP , always a chance that you could get pregnant unless you are dead? Thanks Doc !

sarlat - did you say you felt really well whilst downregging? That?s interesting about that book. I will certainly google it. This antibiotics things is exactly what my acupuncturist was saying. So are they saying that antibiotics works because people have PID or endo? I don?t feel like I have got either of those things but I guess i wouldn?t know unless I had a lap done. I may just mention to my consultant tomorrow about how i was antibiotics when i first got pregnant and see what she says. I expect she has nothing to say on the matter because it would seem that many fertility docs in the nhs can?t or aren?t allowed to think outside the hfea guidelines. Don?t be embarrassed about trying to blag some drugs off the GP...I must say I have been wondering about how I can get some antibiotics off my doc. Not a bloody infection in site. I was stung by a wasp last week and so I have got some cream i have been rubbing in to me...it is a steroid cream so I?m rubbing in more than i should, hoping the steroids will lower the immune system! What a crazy woman I have become. Would be intersteed to hear about this new woo massage. I think i have heard of it before ? isn?t it big in the States?

euro - best of luck with the downregging. It?s thoroughly depressing to end up here but if it works, you?ll never look back.

carrie - it sounds like you are having a horrible time, poor you. why would they not try and zap your endo? Is that what they have done in the past?

Had a wedding this weekend and my friend has made no secret that she wants to have a baby asap. I know she?ll end up pregnant before me, everyone does but it seems to have set me off in to a melancholy , woeful mood. I can?t believe I have been trying for longer than she has even known her now new husband. I use to love weddings but I now find they serve as some horrible reminder that another friend will be upduffed pretty shortly and another friendship will change as they go on into motherhood. I can hear the violins playing in my head, I need to snap out of this.

Afternoon all,
Just to say hi to everyone, hope it was a nice weekend for all.
Euro thinking of you and hoping that there will be a BFP at the end of this particular road. I think you're very brave to be able to do the injections. All the very best xx
Sorry to Joy for the horrid colleague. I hope that he realises how awful his comment must of sounded and perhaps they'll all be a bit more tactful in future.
Sarlat and wine what is this magical massage of which you speak? I'm banned from google but massage is, well, a spa treatment isn't it? I'm sure I'm allowed to google spa treatments?
In other news, Friday turned out to get worse (after car towing incident - btw we have no residents permit because we live in the centre of town - OH parked in the 8pm - 9am spaces across the road from the entrance to our flat which are usually full but happened to be empty when he returned from his friends house - needless to say he didn't see the obscured bloody obvious yellow sign that said no parking mid-night to mid-night, space reserved for removals van...) I dropped my phone on a tiled floor in the kiosk of our local art house cinema and it smashed and I killed Siri . Glad I have insurance but I was questioned like a crimo and read the riot act about fraudulent claims! I'm also battered and bruised from a particularly energetic DIY sesh this weekend. Although I can recommend taking a crowbar to a partition wall with chill out in mind is very therapeutic.
Right, super busy, I'll check in properly later after reflexology Hope everyone has a lovely afternoon xx

Morning ladies! Wow, the shooting sounds awesome. I think I'd really enjoy that. I know there are plenty of shooting ranges in Virginia where you can shoot, but I think it'd be more fun to get out in the open air... I can imagine it being good for letting off steam too.

euro I can't believe that you're already doing the injections. I am weirdly excited for you, even though I know that it's crap and that you must still have mixed feelings about having to put your body through something so extreme. I am rooting for you.

joyce it's ok to feel sad, this is totally rubbish and exhausting to have to deal with, especially when you see other people sprogging without a care in the world. I think weddings often do tend to crystallise feelings that are usually internalised, and it can be unsettling - as in, they naturally make you think about your own life and marriage and children - not least because they actually mention children in some religious services.

sarlat how interesting about the massage. I'll have a google! Ttc is one of those areas where there seem to be so many factors involved that any little tip in the right direction has to be a good thing, no matter how woo it is. Mucho EWCM is absolutely great - that's promising and reassuring that your body has kicked back into action post-IVF. How are you feeling in general?

wine hope you're doing ok and that you're still healing nicely, and that you got some rest over the weekend.

carrie I sympathise about the spots. I have loads... argh. I use a gizmo called a clarisonic, which is like a little electric face brush, and it seems to help a little, but not with the big cysty ones. Sounds like you're having a really rough time, but I'm glad that you and your DH have been brought closer. It's such a stressful experience.

gin amazing again about the EWCM! I don't have any. Good luck with seducing mr gin, and I hope he perks up post-shooting. I'll have my fingers crossed that this is a lucky month for you.

buzzy your GP sounds like a proper character!

teu sorry that you're feeling blue - yay for desserts though. Pudding always cheers me up greedy fecker that I am

princess did you get the car sorted? May I have the cake recipe too? I tried your last one with the olive oil on Saturday and it was yummy!

I went back to the clinic for another scan this morning and the nurse told me that I'm ready to go and should use the trigger shot tonight. I can't believe that this might end up being the first time that I actually ovulate in seven years. I feel like there ought to be a musical accompaniment, perhaps Flight of the Valkyries or something else grandiose by Wagner.

Waves to everyone I've missed - hope you're all feeling chipper and perked of tail plumage.

That sounds positive critter it must be helpful to have scans to see the progress being made.
Joy I know its hard, a work friend is overdue her baby and we were ttc buddies it does get you down. They have never zapped the endo before just said yes its there and that was in 1999 so a while ago. I had an ectopic and cysts in 2004 but I kept bleeding so they kept surgery to a minimum. They are reluctant to do anything surgical due to me having 4 previous and I had adhesions when they last looked. I am hoping they will but at the same time I'm worried about surgery and worried about time off work and making the situation worse

Critter it is really good. You have to focus 100% on what you are doing, so it really takes your mind off things. And as a City gal, I enjoy getting out into the countryside for a day here and there. I've tried the gallery stuff too (under cover) and am likely to try to get licensed for that too because it is more winter-friendly than laying on your belly on the ground! I can't believe there won't be some hardcore outdoor stuff in Virginia though! It's quite easy to pick up too. Saturday was the second day of my marksmanship course and there were 30mph winds blowing so I was very sceptical that I would get anywhere near the target at 600 yds, but I got every shot in the target and a few in the bull!

That is great news! The trigger shot is a breeze to do as it is already loaded (or at least mine was) so you don't have to worry about loading the syringe without getting air in it.

joycep I always think the same about people getting married. I can no longer just enjoy the wedding - I am fearing the pregnancy announcement!

After one downregging injection, I haven't had any of the reported side effects like hot flushes or headaches, but I have had a few ovary twinges, of the kind I usually get in the week leading up to ov. I reckon they are reacting in some way to the drugs in my system.

Critter at the Flight of the Valkyries. That is really exciting about the egg being on it's way. The first in 7 years, surely this one has to be the golden egg?! I'm getting excited for you! Trigger shots away! Oh and yes we got the car back immediately, OH had to go to retrieve from the car pound so that he could get to house in time to take delivery of stuff for the renovations. Thanks for asking. I'm still humming by the way....du-durla-dur-dur du-durla-dur-dur du-durla-dur-dur du-durla-dur-durrrrrrrrrr!! FX for you lady! Looking like June / July could be fruitful months on this thread. Exciting! I hope you don't all start leaving me behind - Eek!

Euro glad to hear that there are no horrific side effects to speak of. Long may it continue this way.

Joy I know what you mean about weddings too. As you can tell, I'm 'delighted' about the 'bird and bees' treat lined up. I hate being so cynical as before I would have been the first to join in and have a great time (and get shit faced and eat all the cheese and cake) and now I'm just all "urgh, that's totally lame" and I'll be sober. Prolonged TTC has turned me into a bit of a grumpy teen again over certain things. However, I'm slightly comforted (in the kind of bitter way that only a long term TTCer can be) that none of the weddings I went to last year (2 in July and 1 in Dec) have yielded babies yet... (I'm rooting for the one in Dec because that was my bestie and her baby would be like a much needed surrogate child for me) ...this makes me feel a bit more normal as I approach my 2 year anniversary next month although leaves me gritted teethed and also on tenterhooks as to when the dreaded announcements will be made. At least the announcement for the July wedding is out of the way. And then wedding season is over for this year. Thank God.

I'll get the cake recipe from OHs head later. He's preparing for a presentation tomorrow and must not be disturbed today...

princess I am now pondering turning up for my portentous post-jab shag tonight wearing a Viking helmet with two horns sticking out either side, Brunhilda stylee. Speaking of costumes, the birds and the bees wedding sounds like a frickin' nightmare. Aaargh. Have you given any more thought to your sparrowhawk outfit? Sorry to hear about Siri. :( My iphone has a massive shatter in one corner. It works still and I've been too tight to replace the screen, but it does make me a little sad whenever I look at it.

euro I am totally inspired by your shooting bonanza. As soon as I've got my work done today, I am going to get googling on Virginian shooting places.

carrie how worrying for you. You poor thing, it sounds like you haven't been having very good care. What a stress. Are you in pain still?

critter yay to golden eggs and ovulation my GP is good and is supportive plus she has kids through IVF so can relate to my situation in some ways, despite the (you're getting old so have private IVF now!!!)

euro hopefully you won't have any side affects,

joy most of my friends aren't married or in any rush so I'm spared that ordeal

carrie big hugs you've had a rough ride

well after a very busy day at work, and a text from Mr B saying" job done and delivered" he has finally done his SA, i'm now waiting for the hospital to call me and tell me when I can pick him up.
I went out with a couple of friends yesterday and it was nice not to talk about babies.
I'm still delaying ERTD not sure what it will be like when it does arrive. Then I'm onto my grabbing and jabbing

waves to everyone else

Hi all no I am not in pain and most side effects have settles just spots. I haven't had the burning I had last month and ovulation should be end of the week so hopefully no pain, if I do I'm going straight to hospital no messing this time.
Birds and bees wedding sounds urgh I'm lucky most of my friends are married and have children so not expecting mush more announcments. One has just had her Rainbow baby and I wouldn't have that any other way.
All this talk of shooting and vikings is very positive in an agressive way lol.
I hope everyone on the IVF journey (we seem to have a few) are managing well

Hi all. Decided I'd better change my name back, seeing you all had! Looked a bit weird being the only 'bloke'!

carrie pleased to hear that you don't have any serious side effects this time.

buzzy hurrah for mrb finally doing his sample. Men, eh? Is ertd late, or are you delaying it with meds?

princess oh no about your phone! Tbh, I've often felt like smashing Siri up though. Mine tends to pop up when I least want him! DIY aches sounds like some seriously diying! I wanna see some pics when it's finished.

euro pleased to hear the first jab went ok but sorry you're feeling down. I tried to hold onto the whole excitement that it might lead to baby to get me through it. Also I think lots of treats and spoiling yourself are important. However, don't think I'll have such excitement next time and will just be grumpy and pessimistic!

joy I totally get what you are saying about weddings. I know that all our friends getting married this year will be trying and I'm sure will be instadifs! Having cut down on booze, I find them really hard to get through and there's almost always a pregnant lady, or people asking us when we're going to sprog. We have a big wedding next month, so have set myself a the task of getting back into drinking before then, hic! Should make it more bearable...

crittter good luck with the trigger! Do you go somewhere to get it??

Did manage to 'seduce' mrgin last night. Had to wake him up to do so, romantic eh? Don't know why I bother really, as our chances are so low. Ah well, as someone's gp said, whilst there's a womb, there's a way!

Critter - good luck with the golden egg - really feeling positive for you. Fingers and toes crossed. Would love updates about how you feel post ovulation. I'm doing ok post IVF. I am very luck as I think my cycle has fallen back in to a near normal but slightly delayed pattern.

Euro - take care and enjoy the ride - plan lots of nice trips and treats for you and DH over the next few weeks.

Joycep - sorry I didn't explain the antibiotic book stuff very well did I. I think what it is trying to say is that many women have pathogens much like women with PID. So for example endo has it's own harmful pathogens even though it isn't considered to be that type of condition, ie bacterial. And so there may be other women and other mild conditions where bacteria / pathogens (which isn't endo related) may be present. The other very interesting thing I read is how couples can be passing bacteria backwards and forwards to each other (not necissarily of the severe STI kind) and this can impact on fertility. The book makes the point about how many women report changes to their cycles once they start TTC. The Dr suggests this is due to the introduction of unprotected sex within naural cycles and / or lots of sex (which couples do get out of the habbit of). This then allows bacteria to occur along which causes some mild changes to the woman's cycle. But how many times have we read here where women have said they had regular cycles then they started TTC and 'wham' things go out of whack. It's an interesting idea.